by Merry Farmer
She bit her lip and was saved the embarrassment of spelling it out as Marjorie strode up to the mouth of the cave.
“Danny, Grace,” she nodded to them, panting.
“Marjorie,” Danny nodded. “Can I help you?”
“Yeah.” She planted her hands on her hips and caught her breath. “Lauren and I were just down at the river. It’s really muddy out there right now, which gave us an idea. Is it all right if we borrow the book to see if it has anything to say about making mud bricks?”
“Sure.” Grace perked up. “That sounds like a great idea.” Bricks would mean they could build strong, solid walls, houses. It was exactly the sort of thing they should be thinking of. Permanence.
“I’d rather you didn’t take it out in the rain,” Danny added.
“Oh.” Marjorie dropped her hands to her sides. “Right.”
“If my lab is dry enough, you can read it in there.”
“Thanks. I’ll check.”
Marjorie nodded to Danny, then to Grace, and turned to jog off to the center of camp.
“See, now that’s the kind of thinking we could use,” Grace said, nodding after her.
“And you don’t think that Kinn or Kutrosky are thinking like that?” Danny countered.
It was hard to tell if he was agreeing with her or challenging her.
“No, I don’t.”
She set her work aside with another sigh and scooted to sit between Danny’s legs with her back against his chest. He finished his tea and put his arms around her. Their hands twined. The problems in front of her seemed smaller with him beside her.
“With all the challenges facing us, Kinn is only concerned with one thing,” she said ominously.
“What one thing?” Danny chuckled. He was goading her now.
She frowned. “He’s waging this whole war, refusing to let the past stay in the past, because he wants women for his soldiers.”
“Is it so bad for a man to want a woman?” He freed a hand from hers and traced his fingertips up his arm.
“Stop it, Danny, this is serious.”
“Very.” He pressed his lips to her neck.
If she could just let go, let someone else solve all their problems….
“And Brian isn’t even trying to form a colony,” she forged ahead, skin tingling. “He’s just sitting there, playing King of the Castle, as Mina put it.”
“Who’s Mina?” Danny asked, straightening.
“I told you, she’s the woman from Brian’s camp who said she and others would be willing to move across the river with the squadron.”
“Oh, that Mina.”
She stifled her urge to catch Danny’s playful mood.
“It’s just so frustrating. It doesn’t make any sense. Would a man really disregard the welfare of the people in his charge just so that he can feel, I don’t know, important? Powerful?”
“I can see how a man would act from his own selfish ends to get what he wanted, yes.” He reached for her skirt, balling the material in his fist and pulling it up her thigh.
“Stop it.” She laughed, breath catching in her throat all the same. “We have problems to solve.” Her concentration began to slip into her core.
“Forgive me if I have other things to think about besides Kutrosky’s ego and Kinn’s libido,” he whispered near her ear. “I have enough of both myself.”
She ignored his innuendo and twisted in his arms to face him, resting her hands against his chest. His heart beat in double-time.
“That’s what I don’t understand,” she went on, regardless of the flush warming Danny’s face and the longing that pulsed through her. “What possible use does it serve for Brian to prevent his people from forming a proper society or to perpetuate this conflict with Kinn or to make accusations against you—”
She clamped her mouth shut a moment too late.
Danny’s eyes flared wider behind his glasses before narrowing. “What accusations?”
“Nothing important.” She covered the prickles of doubt those accusations had raised by looking down.
Danny slid his hand under her chin and forced her to meet his eyes. “What accusations?”
Grace frowned. She opened her mouth to give an excuse but closed it again with a huff. His eyes bored into her like a judge demanding truth.
“He connected you with the Consistory,” she said after a pause. “Which is ridiculous since the Consistory is a myth.”
She waited for him to agree with her and dismiss the whole thing.
The smile left his eyes.
Pin-pricks of panic raced along her skin.
“Even if it isn’t a myth, it doesn’t matter.” She pushed back from the edge of the proverbial cliff gaping under her. “That’s the one thing that I wish everyone would understand. The Terra Project, the Consistory, Earth, they’re all gone as far as we’re concerned. Why can’t anyone let it go?”
Danny rolled his shoulders with a wince, adjusted his position. He cleared his throat. “What did Kutrosky say about the Consistory?”
“Nothing.” Grace sighed. “But that’s not the point.”
“What is the point then?”
“The point is that I’m scared, Danny. I’m scared that we won’t be ready when winter comes. I’m scared that we’ll all starve or freeze to death if we continue choosing sides and feeding factions.”
“I promise that I won’t let you die.” He met and held her eyes. “I would do anything to keep you safe. I’d give my life for yours.”
The joy that filled her heart at his words was matched only by the sting of frustration caused by everything else around them.
“Then you have to help me bring people together. You have to help me figure out a way to end this conflict. You keep mentioning my mother, so fine, I’ll admit it. I want to build the world that she deserved but that we never got. Confession over.”
“Grace.” He brushed a strand of hair from her cheek. “I don’t know if it’s within your power to do that.”
“It has to be.” Her heart pounded harder. “Kutrosky can’t sit on his hands, ignoring the welfare of his people forever. Kinn and his men have to think of something else other than their—”
Danny cradled her face and pulled her into a searing kiss before she could finish her sentence or her thought. His mouth slanted over hers with a possessive passion that left her stunned and limp.
He broke the kiss, kissed her one more time lightly, and said, “There. Now you tell me whether you can think of anything else.”
It took her too long to come back with, “You think you’re that good? That I’ll abandon reason and sense and start a war just to—”
He kissed her again, his arms sliding around her back this time. He didn’t rest there. Before she could consider reacting, he rolled her deeper into the cave and laid her on her back, stretching over top of her. She closed her eyes and soaked in the sensation, so safe on the one hand, so dangerous on the other.
“Is this something you would go to war over?” he murmured, leaving her lips to rain kisses on her nose and cheeks and neck.
She shook her head, sliding her hand up his chest to rest against the side of his face. In spite of their rough conditions he still managed to shave every day.
“It doesn’t matter how much I want—”
He silenced her protest with a kiss so complete it left her liquid with desire. The heat and pressure of his body over hers, the tender caress of his hand over her breast, her own instinctual need to wrap herself around him, were all too much for her argument. She wanted to be with him, in spite of conflict and responsibilities.
“Do you understand, Grace,” he whispered, nibbling on her earlobe, “that a man would do anything, fight anyone, kill anyone, for this?”
She caught her breath as his fingers deftly undid the top buttons of her dress.
“Don’t tell me you’re defending Kinn,” she panted, losing the train of her argument before her sentence was half-finished.
“Never.”
His mouth followed where his hands played. He wedged his knee between her legs, pulling at the hem of her skirt. His calloused fingers tested the soft flesh of her thigh.
“I think we’ve waited long enough, don’t you?” He dipped down to kiss her again.
The pulse of his body above her was a revelation. She could feel his desire for her and hers for him like a brilliant new concept coming clear in her mind. What had she been waiting for? She moved a hand to thread her fingers through his short hair. His hands explored the curves of her body with nothing but tenderness. Forget wars, she would rearrange the stars for him.
“Grace! Grace!”
Sean’s desperate shout split through the tension in the cave, dousing her like a bucket of cold water.
“Grace. I need you. Now.”
“Dammit.” She sighed and rolled out of Danny’s arms. They were more tangled together than she realized and she smacked his chest with her knee as she struggled to her feet. “Sorry.” She had so much more to apologize for besides a little bruise.
“It’s all right.” He forgave her for more than she wanted to think about.
“What, Sean?” she snapped as she straightened and rebuttoned her disheveled dress and brushed back her hair.
Sean wavered to a halt in the mouth of the cave when he saw the state they were in. Danny stood ominously behind her, eyes narrowed in threat. Sean panted and wiped the rain and sweat from his flushed face. His fists clenched at his sides. The possessive anger radiating from him served to focus Grace on the cold realities before them.
“What do you want, Sean?” she repeated.
Sean shifted his stance, his anger for Danny dropping as he faced Grace.
“Kinn and about a dozen of his men are up by the wreck. He’s got one of Kutrosky’s women with him. She’s saying something about, I dunno, an insurrection. He’s asking for you and he wants you there now or else he’s going into Kutrosky’s camp with weapons blazing.”
Urgent fury flooded Grace. She shot a look to Danny, frustration and regret choking her. As much as she wanted to, now more than ever, she couldn’t abandon the crisis before her.
“Kinn knows better than that,” she hissed.
She scrambled to the back of her cave to grab her boots and to put the box away. Danny turned away from staring murder at Sean to watch her, dark caution shading his eyes.
“Will you come with me?” she asked him as she stamped into her boots and bent over to tie them.
“Grace, I don’t think—” Sean began.
“Of course.” Danny cut him off.
She had hesitated for only a moment before taking her lunch tray to the small table against the wall where Sean chewed his sandwich alone. His frown had been a warning for people to stay away. It had darkened when she approached.
“Anyone sitting here?” She asked with cautious cheer.
He shook his head, swallowing and glancing briefly up to her. “Thanks to you, no.” He took a large bite of his sandwich, elbows on the table.
This was going to be harder than she had hoped. She set her tray down and settled in the chair opposite him. “Still mad at me I see.”
He chewed, eyes fixed on his sandwich, swallowed, took a breath and met her eyes. “I’m not mad at you.”
“Yeah, you are.” She stirred her soup. “And I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.” He stared flatly at her. “I was only standing up for what I believed in. I never intended to hurt you.”
“You never do,” he clipped, mouth full.
She started. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means that what you’ve tricked yourself into thinking is nice and noble is, in fact, dangerous and foolhardy.” He burst as though he’d been burning to speak those words for months.
“When have I ever done anything remotely dangerous?”
“Daniel Thorne,” he shot back.
Her tension dissolved into a smirk. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were jealous.”
He narrowed his eyes, as if his sandwich had gone sour, then swallowed and started to stand.
“I’m sorry.” Grace stopped him with a hand on his arm. He took his seat again with a grudging glare. “Look, Sean, the sentencing hearing was over a week ago. I’m sorry if you didn’t like the way it turned out. People have forgotten about it already. We’re back to business as usual.”
“Except that no one takes me seriously anymore. After giving up everything for the Project, I’m in danger of being demoted.”
She sighed. “It doesn’t do anyone any good for us to be at odds. And if it had just been about me and you and Brian Kutrosky, I would have taken a different route. But the simple fact of the matter is that what we do here, on this journey, sets the tone for the entire mission.” She slid her hand across the table to touch his. “It’s not right to let one person suffer when the opportunity to compromise arises.”
“Grace, you don’t have to tell me all this,” he insisted.
“I think I do have to tell you.” She shook her head. “You and I, the people on the Leadership Team, we’re in a privileged position. Being a leader is not about ordering people around and using power to get your way. Being a leader is about being the first person to make a sacrifice for the benefit of the whole. The greater your authority, the greater the sacrifice. It’s our duty.”
Sean replied with a bitter laugh. “Grace, you’re a leader on this mission because you come from a wealthy family who could buy your way into the top levels of the Project. People follow you because of that and because you smile while giving them orders. And now you’re lecturing me about duty and sacrifice?”
He shook his head and shifted in his chair. “Do you even know what sacrifice is? Was it making a sacrifice to move Kutrosky closer to the general population? Closer to where his followers can communicate with him? I wouldn’t call that a sacrifice, I would call that a mistake. God knows what’ll happen next.”
Grace frowned and took a sip of her soup as she formulated her thoughts. “I just want you to understand that I didn’t do it to contradict you, I didn’t say all those things to change the panel’s mind, because I think you’re incompetent, or even because I think you’re wrong.”
“So you think I’m right then?” He sat up straighter, radiating indignation.
“Who knows? All I know is that I don’t believe it’s right to impose a punishment that will damage someone’s sanity, no matter what the alternative.” She let out a breath and shifted in her seat. “I guess what I’m saying is that I think we, as leaders, have to sacrifice our pride if it means doing something humane. But I hope my actions didn’t sacrifice our friendship.”
She stared hard at him to see if her words had any impact at all. He reluctantly raised his eyes to meet hers. He was fighting it. Whatever grudge he had been trying to carry since the sentencing was on its last legs. She smiled to reassure him.
His scowl softened until with a frustrated growl he let it go. “Goddammit, Grace. I can’t stay mad at you. I want to, but I can’t.”
“Good.” She smiled and reached for his hand across the table. “Friends?”
“Yeah, I guess. If that’s what you want to call it.” He heaved a wary sigh and took her hand. His brow twitched as the intent of his thoughts changed. He ran his thumb along her knuckles.
“Where’s Danny?” he asked.
She pulled her hand away. “He has a meeting with Governor King.”
“Governor King?” Sean blinked then narrowed his eyes. “Why? What’d he do?”
She shook her head. “He didn’t do anything. He won’t tell me.”
His stare grew pointed.
“I’m sure he’ll tell me later.”
“No one has a meeting with the governor for nothing. What has he been up to?”
“I told you, nothing. He’s a scientist. For all we know they have meetings with the governor on a regular basis.”
“They don’t.” Sean bristled with impatienc
e. “You shouldn’t be spending so much time with someone who’s not a participant in the Project anyhow, Grace.”
“Excuse me.” She sat straighter. “Since when did you decide who I can and can’t spend time with?”
“Come on, Grace.” His alarm melted into a sly grin. “You’re talking to someone with access to the Secondary Protocol here. Anything happens and you become my direct responsibility.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He took a bite of his sandwich and gestured to her bowl. “Eat your soup.”
The rain picked up as Grace, Danny, and Sean raced out of the forest near the spot of the wreck. Grace’s dress was soaked and muddied at the hem, and her hair hung in wet tendrils, sticking to the sides of her face and her neck. She wiped it aside as she stepped into the clearing.
Kinn and half a dozen of his men stood with weapons in hand while Mina sat huddled on a log beside a feebly flickering fire pit. Stacey and Gil had come down from the other side of the hill and stood near Peter’s grave, watching the soldiers with thinly veiled alarm.
“Kinn.” Grace nodded to him as he stood straighter and strode to meet her. She glanced past him to Mina. “Mina. You look cold. Has anyone offered you a blanket?”
“I’m fine.” Mina’s teeth chattered and she hugged herself tighter.
“What took you so long?” Kinn frowned, his voice deep and gravelly. He sent a sharp glance past her to Sean, narrowing his eyes. Sean bristled in response.
“The rain slowed us down.” She wove some truth into her lie. Kinn still had no idea where they’d moved their camp and God help her, she wanted to keep it that way. “Sean mentioned something about an insurrection?”
“Insurrection?” Kinn laughed. “You told her that?”
Sean took a threatening step forward. “That’s what she told me.” He pointed at Mina.
“Okay, so insurrection’s a bit of an overstatement,” Mina confessed from her seat on the log.
“She showed up at the bridge saying she had a plan to get some women out of Kutrosky’s camp and over to ours.” Kinn filled in the gaps.
Grace fought down a wave of anger. She and Danny had been interrupted for this?
