by Nora Snowdon
There it was. His lip curled up in a grin. Her glorious scent. His nose pinpointed the tree and he glanced up. He could barely see her high up nestled between the trunk and the limb. How’d she get up there? She’d hear him transitioning, but it couldn’t be helped. He couldn’t climb a tree in wolf form. He hurried the process as much as he could, but by the time he’d finished she was down from her perch and standing beside him. How the hell did she do that so fast?
She eyed him warily, taking in his nakedness before focusing on his face. “What are you doing here?”
“Really?” He shook his head in disbelief. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you. If you don’t want my help then let me get Rosie or Anna for you.” He bent to retrieve his phone.
“No.” She placed her hand over his to stop him.
He took her hand to his lips and kissed it. “I want what’s best for you. Tell me how to help you.”
Wordlessly she slipped into his embrace, her jeans rough against his bare skin. The tension drained from his body. She was still his. At least for now. He glanced up. The stars danced behind a thin layer of mist but still revealed their secrets. “We have a couple of hours before midnight. Want to go out for a steak?”
Her stomach rumbled but she scrunched up her nose. “Seafood?”
“Sure.” He grinned. She was probably being contrary but as long as she was with him, that was fine. “I’ll switch back when we get nearer to my car.” As a wolf he’d be more protection than as a naked man. He kissed her, and once again for good measure, and then hunkered down into the downward dog position. She watched him transition in silence and once his tail was in full fluff, they set off.
In the local restaurant he broached the subject with caution. “I know you say you’re not, um, changing. But will you maybe humor me by pretending to try?”
She sighed then nodded.
Hallelujah! He was finally getting through. “Unfortunately I can’t take you to our private property. It’s a two hour drive from here and there’s just not time.”
“Don’t make a big thing out of this. You transitioned in my house just last week, so surely it’ll be fine for you to try to turn me there.”
He clenched his jaw to keep from responding. Jesus. Don’t overreact. She’s agreed to try transitioning. He shrugged and unlocked his jaw. “It is a big traditional thing in our culture. Unfortunately coming into the pack after puberty, you don’t get all the stories and celebrations. But sure, your house is fine. Ready to go?”
“Okay. Let’s do it.”
He paid the bill and walked her out to his car. He’d won, so why was he back to feeling on edge? God, if this was what true love does to your nerves, maybe he was happier with simple lust
****
I can’t believe I let him talk me into this. Robert was acting very solicitous. Maybe he worried if he said the wrong thing I’d change my mind. Nope. No going back now. The neighborhood felt unnaturally quiet as we pulled up to the curb outside my house. From the lack of lights shining through windows it appeared as though everyone was asleep. Not even the dog next door rallied for a disgruntled bark. I took Robert’s hand as we walked up the pathway to my front door. We couldn’t end our relationship being this distant to each other. When I let go to unlock the door, he slid his hands around my waist and kissed the back of my neck. Mmm, that’s more like it.
I led him into the living room, turned on the lights and closed the curtains. “I guess we get naked?”
He nodded so I moved toward him and started to undo his pants. He laughed and slid his hand up under my shirt. Then he kissed me. Not the gentle caring kiss like when he found me in my tree. No this was one of those brain-frying kisses that shuts down every thought but one. And jeez that was what I needed.
“Now. Please.” I begged as he backed me over and onto the couch. He nuzzled my neck as his fabulous hands seemed to be everywhere on my body stroking and teasing me until I was just on the verge. Then he slid inside, filling me, rocking me, electrifying me until I was lost in a fiery explosion.
“Holy—”
“—Crap?” he finished for me.
I just nodded, too spent for more conversation. He edged over onto his side, wedging himself between me and the back of my couch. Peering into my eyes, he leaned forward to kiss my forehead. His arms enveloped me in a comfortable hug.
“You don’t have to answer, but you do have to believe me. I love you, Ella.”
I kissed his neck and snuggled in closer.
Too soon he loosened his grip. “It’s time.”
I sighed. I felt it too. Almost like a cloud had settled just above us waiting to unleash a huge electrical storm. I slid off the couch reluctantly and went down on my hands and knees as I’d seen him do. “Okay.” I wasn’t sure what to expect, or even what to hope for. Could I become a wolf?
He crouched beside me. “The first thing I’d like you to do is close your eyes and envision a wolf. See the wolf in front of you. Now picture the wolf’s hind legs and feet. Think of the muscle structure, the bones…”
His voice was deep and melodic and I almost started drifting off as he went through describing more wolf parts. Then there was a loud cracking noise like a bone or cartilage breaking. A squeaking, bending noise and more, louder cracks and pops. Robert kept speaking low and rhythmically going through the whole sequence of how to become a wolf. Then there was silence.
An almost deafening silence.
“What the fuck?” Robert’s shout ripped through the air.
I sat back on my haunches and stared at him. His eyes bulged in disbelief. Then I lifted a golden paw to my mouth and casually licked the fur into the proper semblance. His jaw was slack and he was silent. I shifted to wash my shoulder.
Then he yelled, “You can’t be a cat! That’s not possible.”
My heart pounded, but I continued my ablutions waiting to see what he’d do next. I’d wondered what it would be like to be a werewolf, but I was kind of glad to find I was still myself. After twenty seven years as a werecougar, I didn’t think I’d know how to be anything else. I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he paced my small living room, shaking his head and muttering.
“Is this because I was neutered? Did that damn vet destroy my bite? I can’t be in love with a cat. It’s not possible.”
Well that was enough. A girl’s self-esteem can only take so much. With a swish of my tail I jumped to my feet, slunk from the room and out through a small hidden door off the kitchen. Three blocks through the back alleys until I was back in my beloved park and in my tree. Damn him!
I continued washing. I didn’t know what else to do. Even if I hadn’t told him I loved him, it didn’t make it any less true. In a way, when he started to coach me, I almost wanted to become a wolf. It would be so much easier to be part of a loving pack. Not that I quite got their rowdiness, but his family seemed so much goofier and friendlier than the few other werecougars I’d encountered.
Mom was right; I was going to die alone. I’d rejected the European Cougar Mom had found him on-line for me. I didn’t even like him, so how could I ever fall in love with him. But to Mom, lineage and babies were my only purpose and if I wasn’t going to produce a litter, she had no use for me.
I‘d been so sure love was a better reason for living. I guess I was wrong. As always, the joke was on me.
CHAPTER 7
Robert burrowed into the soft leather couch in his darkened den—he hadn’t really articulated it as a hiding spot until Ella asked him—and listened to Lucas painstakingly picking his lock. Obviously he should’ve used a better security device as the tumblers clicked into place.
Robert blinked as Lucas flipped on the lights.
“Aha!” His brother looked inordinately proud of his prowess. “I guess you know mother is trying to get a hold of you.”
Robert rolled his eyes. “So, what else is new?”
“I’ve been a little concerned myself. It’s been days since we heard from you.”
Lucas glanced at the used food delivery containers and empty beer cans littering the glass tabletop, his lips thinning in disapproval. “How did Ella’s transition go? And why are you avoiding everyone?”
“Ella didn’t transition into a werewolf.” Robert shrugged. “I guess Dr. Galloway’s surgery snipped other abilities besides just procreating.” A few white lies seemed the best way to go, although God he dreaded the, “Poor Robert the Impotent Biter” looks when word got out. He had to keep Ella’s safe from his pack. He owed her that much.
“What? Oh god, I’m so sorry, Rob. Was she terribly upset?”
“Yup. We broke up.”
“But she’s your mate! You can’t let her go.”
“She wasn’t my mate.” Robert tried to keep the bitterness from his voice, but Jesus, if she hadn’t been a werecougar, he would’ve been the happiest man on earth. Even if she hadn’t transitioned and stayed a human, he could’ve dealt with that. But a cat? No way.
“The hell she wasn’t. I saw the way you two fit together. You’ve never looked at any woman with so much reverence; it was like she brought out a whole new gentleness in you. Even Rosie said that Thursday night was the only time she’d ever seen you truly happy.”
Robert snorted in denial as he went to the sidebar to grab himself another beer. “That’s not true.”
“It is and you know it,” Lucas persisted. “Do you want me to go talk with her? Maybe it’s just a misunderstanding.”
“No!” Robert slammed his unopened beer on the bar. Hmm, better not open it now. “Just leave it alone, Lucas. I mean it.” He glared at his brother until Lucas took a step back in submission.
“Okay. But then you’d better shape up and go after her. I’d hate to see you slip back into that drunken mess you were after the effing surgery.”
“I won’t.” Robert tossed Lucas his beer. Who knew how long beers stayed ready to blow after being shaken? He grabbed another beer then changed his mind and put it back. Lucas had helped him sober up on his last binge, he owed his brother some consideration. He softened his voice. “Thanks for caring, Lucas. I’ll be fine.”
“Sure.” He didn’t sound convinced. “Hey, did you read the council news alert?”
“No.” He hadn’t done much of anything other than mope since he’d left Ella’s house. God, he was pathetic.
“The Pack Council is up in arms. Daryl, on the Parks and Wildlife Board, says there’ve been cougar sightings in the ravine and a few of the parks. Pets have gone missing and now conservation officers are coming in droves from neighboring counties.”
“A cougar? I’ve never heard of a cougar sighting this far west.” Oh shit. Ella? But she wouldn’t attack pets. She’d even mentioned that she’d wanted a pet. He winced, remembering. Jeez, a pet cat. He shook his head. She’d given him so many clues about her feline form; he just hadn’t picked up on them.
“Yup. If the heat doesn’t come off by next full moon we may need to take the run out of town. Regular people might be fooled that we could be wolf crosses, but I wouldn’t want to run into one of those wildlife experts.”
“Why wouldn’t one of us have sensed a cougar in our territory?” Like me, for instance. Shit. He had to do something. Robert picked up the phone and then swiftly replaced it. Obviously he couldn’t warn Ella in front of Lucas. He drummed his fingertips on the bar. How fast could he get rid of his brother?
“Don’t know,” Lucas watched him carefully, probably checking for signs of drugs. “But it’s here now and it sounds vicious. All we need is one bad public incident and then it won’t be safe for us to transition anywhere.” Lucas put down his unopened beer and absentmindedly stacked several of the Styrofoam containers. “We might go out as a pack and track that sucker down.”
God, no! He’d worried how his family might react to Ella’s secret, but he hadn’t even considered that others in the pack might want to kill her. “That’d be too risky. In a pack you’d be even more likely to run up against some fool with a gun.”
“Maybe. But we have to do something, and soon.” Lucas picked up the beer cans from the floor and lined them up on the counter next to the containers.
“Hold off two days and let me back to you. I have a plan.” He wished he did, but at least he could buy Ella some time.
“Sure. I wasn’t too thrilled with the hunting pack idea either, but you know how aggressive some of the younger unattached males can get.”
“Yup.” Robert stood. He needed to let go of his dream of leading the pack. He’d been keeping them in line as his dad’s dementia increased, but they would never accept a neutered wolf as their alpha. Lucas had to step into his rightful position. “The pack needs a new leader or those young hotheads will usurp the power. Tell Dad tonight that you’re taking over. I’ll convince Council and have you sworn in by next moon. And don’t worry about the cougar. I’ll take care of it.”
“Really?” Lucas had always deferred to him.
This should be an interesting dynamic having to obey his little brother. Robert knew he wasn’t going to like it.
“Trust me.” Robert put his hand on Lucas’ shoulder and walked him out toward the front door. At least with Lucas running the pack, Robert would be free to figure out how to protect Ella.
****
A low mist muted the last dying embers of the setting sun as Robert transitioned inside the thickly wooded area of Ella’s park. Hmm, he didn’t even think of it as Woodside Park anymore. Everything he’d emotionally connected to Ella had somehow become sepia-toned and imprinted with her memory. Then he’d suddenly remember how she broke his heart and ache for what might’ve been, all over again.
He shook his head to clear his thoughts and loped toward her tree. A strange scent caught his nose. He lightened his footsteps as he headed off in a different direction. His hackles rose as the scent became muskier and more repugnant. He slowed to a silent crawl. In a small break in the woods a massive cougar played mercilessly with a small hapless creature. Robert hoped as hell the victim wasn’t someone’s pet.
Robert froze as the cat raised cold eyes to stare in his direction. The cat sniffed and then returned to kill and devour its prey. Robert slowly exhaled the breath he’d been holding. Another cougar? Could it have scented Ella and tracked her down? Robert lowered himself to the ground to wait. If he found where the cat was sleeping, he could alert the conservation guys and they could trap it.
After finishing most of its meal, the feline washed itself and then picked up the leftovers and stealthily slunk off in the opposite direction. Following from a distance, Robert watched astounded as it transitioned mid motion into a tall, muscular man with sandy brown hair cascading down his shoulders. He pulled on some beige Dockers and a hunter green polo shirt from under a bush, placed the half-eaten carcass in a shiny gift bag, and then casually strolled barefoot from the park.
One of Ella’s relatives? But according to his research on Ella and what she said, she didn’t have any family other than her estranged mother. Could he be her mate? Robert’s stomach turned at the thought. The man looked like a fucking underwear model and probably could have his choice of mates. Plus he was also well endowed in cat form. Robert let out the growl he’d been suppressing.
Doubling back, Robert found Ella’s tree but it was empty. Shit. Now he really needed to talk to her. Whatever her relationship with that asshole, he had to leave town before he ruined the city for all of them.
****
The doorbell rang at the same moment as my microwave dinged. I eyed my fish sticks with dismay. Could I ignore whoever was at the door and just eat the meal while it was still hot? Not that I was hungry, but at least food was something to do. I’d always been alone before but I’d never experienced such depths of loneliness. Now I understood all those sappy love songs. My life had been sucked out of me.
With a grumble, I tip-toed over to peek through the peephole. My jaw dropped in shock. Robert? He seemed to be peering off to the left. Last time I saw him do that I�
��d assumed he was embarrassed to be seen at my door. Now I just wondered what he was looking at. Well, that and why the hell was he there?
I stared at him a little longer, taking in his image like an alcoholic enjoying a drink after forced abstinence. His eyes looked drawn and his face held a gauntness I’d never seen. My hand reached for the doorknob. I stopped myself.
No. He’d said he could never love a cat. He probably just wanted his family photo back. Well if I couldn’t have him, I was at least going to keep that one small memento from our affair. I crept away from the door, my throat constricting with yet more tears.
****
At dusk, Robert entered the park near where he’d seen the guy exit the previous night. He found the cat swiftly and followed it. This time the cat left the park still in cougar form and snuck through the trees to Ella’s place. There he uncovered a gift bag, filled it with his half-eaten kill and left it on her back porch. A feline’s method of wooing? Robert wanted to rip the cougar’s throat and eviscerate his innards, just imagining him with Ella.
Slinking back into the trees, the guy transitioned then pulled his clothes from within the thick branches of a Hemlock. The neighbor’s corgi/terrier cross let out a ferocious roar and it took all of Robert’s skill not to react to the incessant noise. The cougar/man curled his lip in a sneer at the small dog and strolled through the alley until he came to a shiny black Porsche SUV.
Great. The jerk is loaded, too. Damn car probably costs more than most the mortgages around here. Robert memorized the license plate before heading back to Woodside Park. That should give him enough info on the guy.
Re-entering the park, Robert loped toward Ella’s tree. She hadn’t responded to his phone messages or answered her door and he was running out of time. Lucas could only stall the pack for so long. A multitude of new and disturbing scents greeted him as soon as he ran a couple of miles into the park, human sweat, oil, amongst them. He quickened his pace until the odors almost overwhelmed him. He stopped abruptly.
