It's In His Heart (A Red River Valley Novel)

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It's In His Heart (A Red River Valley Novel) Page 21

by Shelly Alexander


  “Ella?” he murmured into her ear.

  “Hmmm?” she said against his shoulder, her voice sleepy and content.

  “Do you want to know why I didn’t visit Bradley very much? I want you to know because it must’ve bothered you.” It bothered him, and he still carried guilt over it.

  She lifted her head off his shoulder and stared into his eyes.

  “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” she said. “I know you loved him like a brother.”

  “I want to talk about it with you.” He pulled in a gravelly breath. “I care about what you think.”

  Ella tucked a wet strand of his wavy hair behind his ear and caressed his cheek with the back of her hand. “I wondered at first. I was angry for a long time because I thought you abandoned him. But then, when I came to Red River and got to know you better, I think I figured it out.”

  His brow wrinkled.

  Ella stroked a soft fingertip across his forehead to smooth out the tension. “Coop, I had to sit and watch him wither away in that bed, not even in his right mind toward the end. I was his wife, and I loved him, and even I wanted to get away from seeing him like that. I’d have done anything not to have to watch it. I couldn’t stand it. It almost killed me right along with him.”

  “I’m sorry, Ella.” Coop’s voice was a plea. “I should’ve been there for both of you, but when I saw him in that bed the first time, I couldn’t handle it. He was the best guy I ever knew, the best friend I ever had, and there was nothing I could do to save him.”

  Coop choked back the pain that stabbed at his heart.

  Ella put a finger over Coop’s lips. “Shh. He wouldn’t have wanted either of us to keep suffering. It’s time for both of us to let him go.”

  “Is that why you left Albuquerque?”

  She inhaled, and nodded. “There were just too many bad memories there. I didn’t want to remember him that way. You know, the way he was at the end. I wanted to remember him when he was young and healthy and happy. Like when he came here to Red River.”

  “You made him happy, Ella.”

  She rubbed her cheek against his. “Thank you. That means a lot coming from you.”

  He waded around the pool with her snuggled against his neck, wrapped around him like a second skin. He caressed her back with his fingers, and she brushed soft kisses across his shoulder.

  They were silent for a long time, just soaking in the therapeutic waters. Just being. Coop loved the way she molded into his arms, against his chest. Yes, the sex was great, but he loved the simple quiet time they spent together, too. It made him aware of how badly broken he’d been. Severed in two, in fact, but Ella was the glue that had put him back together and held him there, allowing him to be whole and content for the first time.

  “Coop?”

  “Yeah, sweetheart.” Sweetheart. He’d never called any girl that before. He purposefully used their real names instead of terms of endearment.

  With Ella, it sounded good. Sounded right.

  She brushed kisses up his neck to his cheek, and his heart thrummed in his chest.

  “Do I make you happy?”

  He pulled her head up and found her mouth. After a long, deep kiss that involved a lot of sensuous sounds, he pulled away. “Yeah, you make me very happy.”

  Her face shone like another star in the clear New Mexico sky.

  “Let’s go home, and I’ll show you just how happy you make me.” He nuzzled her neck.

  “Okay, but let’s stop by the drugstore first.” She giggled.

  “Already taken care of, babe.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  When Coop finished his early shift at Joe’s, he sat down at a table to talk to Hank and Andy. “What’s up with you two?”

  Hank swilled his beer. “My wife’s turned into a sex fiend because of those darned books.”

  “Mine, too.” Andy shrugged with a smile.

  “And that’s a bad thing?” Coop asked, a little confused.

  “I’m good with it,” said Andy.

  “Well, I’m not,” Hank retorted. “Some of the toys she’s been ordering online are just a little too twisted. People will think I’m a sex maniac.”

  “How will people know?” asked Coop.

  “In this town? Are you serious?”

  “I see your point.” Coop rubbed his jaw. “I’ve seen several of those books around, so I don’t think you’re the only husband suffering.” He grinned at Andy. “Sounds like a good problem to have.”

  “Now they’re driving into Taos to get the new book next week when it’s released. It’s been on the news and everything. I drew the line when Donna wanted to get me a C-ring,” mumbled Hank.

  “TMI, dude,” Andy said.

  Coop’s cell phone rang. “Saved by the ringtone.” Cal’s picture popped onto the screen, and Coop hit the green button. “Hi, Cal.”

  “Hey, Big Bro. Dad and I picked up Ella earlier. She’s at our house tutoring me. Want to come over for dinner?”

  “Sure. I just finished my shift, I’ll be there soon.” Thank God, because the conversation with Hank and Andy had gone beyond bizarre. “All this tutoring is going to help you get into college. You’re going to be a senior this fall. It’s time to start thinking about where you want to go.”

  The line was silent.

  “Cal?”

  “Yeah, about that.”

  Coop got an uneasy feeling. “I’m listening.”

  “I don’t think I want to go to college.”

  “Of course you do. You can’t go to chiropractic school unless you go to college first.”

  More silence.

  “Cal?” Coop drew out his brother’s name into three syllables.

  “I don’t think I want to be a chiropractor, either.”

  “What? Of course you do. We’ve been planning this for years.”

  Cal sighed. “No Coop, you and Dad have been planning it. I’ve got other plans.”

  “Like what?”

  “Like being a firefighter. Look, we can talk about this later. Did you know today is Ella’s birthday?”

  What? “No, actually, she didn’t mention it.” Why wouldn’t she tell him? That was kind of an important detail to overlook.

  “We offered to take her out, but she didn’t want us to make a big deal about it. To celebrate, Dad’s cooking on the grill and I’m churning ice cream. It’s the best we can come up with on such short notice.”

  “Sounds good. Give me a little bit, I’ve got to make a stop on the way.” Coop hesitated. “And Cal, we’re not finished discussing college.”

  The line went dead, and Coop stared at his cell.

  Coop pulled into Butch’s drive and parked in front of the house. He got out and walked around to the backyard. Ella and Cal sat at the picnic table again, their favorite tutoring spot, and talked.

  “I’m not smart enough to go to college anyway.”

  The familiar sadness Coop had felt growing up hit him square in the chest like a hammer.

  “You are smart enough to go to college. Don’t use your disability as an excuse.”

  Coop had to stop himself from applauding Ella’s comeback, because that was exactly the right thing to say. Smart and wise. And gorgeous to boot.

  “The question is, do you want to go?” she asked Cal.

  Cal shrugged. “I’m not sure. I don’t think so. I’m happy here in Red River, and I really want to be a firefighter. That’s my dream. I don’t want to be a chiropractor.”

  “My family wanted me to be a veterinarian so I could stay on the ranch and work it, just like they all did. It angered them that I wanted something different. I was the Judas that broke away.”

  Coop hadn’t thought of it that way—Ella’s family resenting her just because she wanted something different
. Something more.

  “I love my family, and I liked where I grew up, but I wanted to experience a little bit more of the world, and I wanted to give back because my life had been so blessed. So, I moved out here and became a teacher.”

  “Did your family ever forgive you?”

  She nodded and patted his arm. “Sure they did. They still miss me and want me to move back to East Texas, but that’s just because they love me.”

  “Did you regret becoming a teacher?”

  “Never. I loved my job. Loved teaching kids like you, even if they did act like knuckleheads sometimes.” She ruffled his hair. “Being a firefighter is an honorable profession, just like teaching. Just be sure that’s what you really want, and you’re not giving up on an opportunity to go to college because you’re afraid to leave here or because of your reading disability. If you do decide to go to college, you can still be a firefighter, and you could move back here when you’re done with school.” She elbowed him. “Besides, dyslexia can work to your advantage in college.”

  “No way.” Cal shook his head in disbelief. “Really?”

  “Girls will think you’re complicated. They’ll line up to help you study.”

  Cal looked stunned, then a mischievous smile spread across his face. “That could work.”

  “Don’t discount college just yet. Just think about it, that’s all I’m saying.” Ella’s schoolteacher voice was so solid. So exactly what Coop’s little brother needed to hear right now.

  “UNM is only a few hours away, and we’ll all be waiting here for you when you come back.”

  We. Here. Coop liked the sound of those two little words more than he thought possible.

  They drove home after dark, full from the side of beef ribs Butch had grilled and the homemade ice cream. Infinitely better than Cap’n Crunch. Ella sighed, happy and content.

  “You okay?” She reached for Coop’s hand. He grabbed hers in return, almost urgently, but he didn’t say anything. Just looked ahead at the road.

  Her free hand went to her throat, and she fingered the small gold heart he’d given her as a birthday present. How did he find something so quickly? She’d purposely not told anyone about her birthday, especially him, because she didn’t want him to feel obligated to buy her a gift. After losing someone she loved, Ella didn’t care much about material possessions. It was time, quality time, she craved. And since she didn’t know for sure how much time she’d have with Coop, that’s all she’d wanted that day.

  But the dainty heart that nestled in the hollow of her throat just above her collarbone was perfect. Simple. Elegant. It represented love.

  When they got back to the cabin, he hurried her to the door. The dogs barreled past them as soon as Coop opened it. He pulled her inside and kicked the door shut with his foot.

  “The dogs—”

  “Can wait.” His lean body closed around her, enveloping her with need. His desire so obvious, so apparent, it vibrated through him and prickled over her skin like a maestro conducting a concerto. “I need you. Now.”

  Without warning, he picked her up and carried her into his bedroom.

  Placing her on her back, he lay next to her. He didn’t kiss her yet. Just ran his warm palm from her neck down her stomach, and massaged her sex through the thick fabric of her shorts. Then, gentle and slow, he undressed her. So carefully, like she was a doll that would break in his hands. When he rubbed the lace strip between her legs, she moaned. A small shudder of a noise escaped from somewhere deep inside him. It cut to her soul and made her ache to her core.

  “Coop.” She tried to clear the sensual fog from her head, but it gripped her senses and clouded her consciousness. She needed to tell him, say the words, so he would know how she really felt about him.

  She loved him. Fully and completely.

  And it terrified her.

  He was none of the things she’d wanted in a man. Yet she loved him and wanted him just the way he was now. Not the man he’d been before, but the man he’d grown into. The man she never knew existed.

  When he slipped his hand under her lace panties, she arched toward him. Under his touch, her body ebbed and flowed, quivered and undulated, until she was begging him to take her. To relieve that violent demand that she felt climbing inside her.

  She tore at his shirt, and he didn’t seem to mind. When she couldn’t get the buttons undone fast enough, she ripped them off, and they popped and flew in every direction. With the barrier gone, Ella ran her palms over the hard planes of his chest. He stared down at her with the look of a conqueror, and she very much wanted to be conquered by him. Only him.

  He still hadn’t kissed her. Just drank her in with eyes blazing with lust, scorching every inch of her bared body from head to curled toes. And she did the same to him.

  Ella couldn’t remember how his pants came off, or her panties and bra, nor did she care. He laced one set of fingers through hers and pinned her hand to the pillow over her head. When he entered her, she cried out and buried her face in his shoulder. The ecstasy of him filling her so completely was unbearably sweet.

  “Ella,” he grunted, going still. “Baby, you’re biting me.”

  And, oh heavens, she was. She released his shoulder from between her teeth and kissed the same spot, running her tongue over the teeth marks.

  “Sorry,” she murmured against his sinewy neck. “I’ll make it up to you.”

  “I’m counting on it.” His voice held a smile, and Ella pulled him deeper inside her.

  His strokes were urgent and fast at first, but then he found a slow, sweet rhythm that bespoke pure, tender emotion.

  At that moment, Ella knew Coop loved her, too. He hadn’t said it in words, but he was communicating it to her now through an unspoken language—with his body, with his touch, with every movement that he so carefully orchestrated. It wasn’t just sex. Their bodies, their souls, their hearts were mingled and entwined into one until she wasn’t sure where she ended and he began. Because there was no beginning and no end to them as individuals anymore. It was just them. One entity, bound together by something so much bigger than just sex.

  Ella shattered into a million tiny pieces as an orgasm overtook her, washing her over the edge of complete and utter bliss. A moment later, Coop found his release and whispered her name as he did.

  They lay there for a long time, the sounds of night filtering into their room through the silence. When their breathing returned to normal, Ella caressed down his rib cage, over his hips, gently massaging. Then she traced a circular pattern over to his spine and down to his buttocks.

  Swelling inside her again, he moaned. “How do you do that to me?” he ground out. “When you touch me, I go crazy.”

  A smile spread across her lips, and she nibbled sweet kisses over his shoulder and neck.

  His breathing grew ragged, and his cock grew thick and hard again. “When we’re in a crowd, sometimes I want you so much I could take you to my truck and make love to you right there. Even in broad daylight.”

  Ella giggled. “Would you really do that?” she asked, moving her hips into him gently.

  “Of course not.” His teeth, jaw, and eyes all clenched as she moved harder against him, and he lifted onto his elbows to hover over her. “You deserve better than the backseat of a car.”

  “What if I were willing?” she asked, her voice taunting and seductive.

  His eyes flew wide, and he stared down at her.

  She shrugged. “I’ve never done it in the backseat of a car, but I’d do it with you.” She bit her bottom lip. “It might be fun.”

  His eyes glazed over with desire, he began to move in her with slow and gentle strokes. “So, Miss Straight-Lace wants to live on the edge? With me?”

  Her laugh was coupled with a moan of pleasure as his strokes grew more determined.

  “Only with you.” She stared u
p at him. Her breath caught when he sank so far into her, her insides began to quiver on the brink of another orgasm.

  In a movement so smooth and quick she squeaked, Coop had her on top, guiding and moving her hips in a circular motion with one hand while he stroked her cleft with a thumb.

  He lifted her to his tip, then plunged her down on him again. The sexual tension built and roiled inside her with every stroke. Close to the brink, Ella reached up and grabbed the headboard, taking control of the force of her body pounding into his. He murmured her name, one hand clamped to her hip, the other still stroking her sex, and he rose to suckle one breast, then the other.

  She came with a desperate cry of his name, which pulled him with her, and she collapsed against his heaving chest.

  In sweet silence, Ella slid down his body to cuddle against his side. He bundled her onto his chest and pulled the covers up around them. After feathering sweet kisses across the top of her head, he settled into his pillow, still wrapped around her like a straitjacket.

  When Ella heard his soft snore, she murmured against his chest, “I love you, Cooper.” Then she drifted off into a peaceful, content sleep, hoping this would last forever.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Coop and Ella pulled into a parking spot in front of the post office and got out. In a town the size of Red River, the post office served as a social gathering point just as much as Joe’s did. If the crowded parking lot was any indication, the locals were out in force.

  “The gossip must be flowing today,” Coop said, nodding to another car that inched into the lot off of Main Street. “Donna’s got a full house.” He opened the door for Ella.

  Ella laughed as she walked through. “She’s the best source in town.”

  Two older women chatted it up about their last visit to Doc Holloway’s office, while people milled in and out of the post office buying stamps, mailing vacation postcards, or picking up mail. Ella stopped to talk to Donna behind the front desk, while Coop went to his box and dialed in the combination. He picked a few envelopes from the box and thumbed through them, walking over to the counter.

 

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