by Wahida Clark
Bullet and Whitey both knew it would be foolish to say a word. Just let Snake vent and hopefully he would let it go. But as usual, Whitey couldn’t resist. “Yo, Unc just said you wanted us to come and chill. So how was we supposed to know? Cut us some slack.”
“What?” Snake looked at him in disbelief. “You challenging me, you white muthafucka! Yo, Bullet, pull over, man. Get the fuck out!”
Whitey cocked his head at Snake. “Get the fuck out? Nigga, you put me out and I don’t know where the fuck I am. I’m from tha South. Got me all the way up here in New York. Shit, I just got a call saying Snake need you. I ain’t ask no questions. I ain’t even know where the fuck I was going until I got to the airport. I’m at your beck and call, nigga. The only thing Unc told us was that you wanted us to chill with you. You the one sent for me. Now you wanna put a muthafucka out? And over a bitch? I wish the fuck I would get out. Put me out. You trippin’, man.”
“Get this fool out of my ride,” Snake said nonchalantly.
They were on Route 1 and 9. Bullet pulled into a BP gas station. Whitey got out and before he slammed the door he warned, “You need me, nigga.”
Bullet pulled off. “Where to?”
“Just drive, nigga. I gotta get geared up for this work we gotta put in.” He leaned back into the seat and thought about it. At the first exit he said, “Turn around and go back and get that white nigga.”
“You know you was wrong.”
“Man, shut the fuck up!”
“Aiight, Snake. You can’t keep disrespecting us like that. Get us down here and acting all grimey. You shut the fuck up!”
Three days later, low on funds and her suitcase still in the trunk of Snake’s car, Carmen found her way to her mother’s house. Embarrassment swept over her face as she rang the bell.
“Carrrrmen,” her friend Shae called out. Carmen rang the bell again, waved at her but kept her back turned.
“C’mon, Mommy,” she mumbled as she willed her mother to come to the door.
“Who is it?” Mrs. Smith called out.
“It’s me, Mom.” Carmen held her breath as she felt her mother pause. She exhaled as her mother slowly took the locks off the door.
Mrs. Smith cracked it, looked at her daughter’s bruised face, and almost fainted. “Oh my heavenly father.”
“Mom, please. Save the drama, the prayers, and the speeches, because I don’t want to hear them. I just need a place to stay for a couple of nights and I need to pack a few things. So just open the fuckin’ door.” She pushed the door open so hard it damn near knocked Mrs. Smith on her ass.
Lil’E and Papi Chulo were seated in Kaylin’s office, discussing Papi Chulo’s album release party and Lil’E's remix single just turning gold, when Angel walked in. Even though she was eight months pregnant, when she felt the urge, like today, she would still wear a pair of stilettos, despite Kaylin’s never-ending protests.
Papi Chulo jumped up and gave Angel a hug.
“Hey! Hey! Stop trying to feel on my wife, man,” Kaylin teased.
“Mrs. Santos, will you marry me?” He got down on one knee.
She slapped him in the head with the folder she was carrying and everyone burst into laughter.
“See, you kiss-ass. That’s what you get,” Lil’E scolded.
“Mami, I have to kiss ass. I’m not prego like you. You two are road dawgs.” Everyone laughed again.
“I need to talk to my husband. Are you guys done here?” Papi and Lily stood up. She was now six months pregnant and was doing well. “Both of you guys are doing extremely well. I’m proud of the both of you.”
“Does that mean you’ll marry me?” Papi tried again.
“Sorry, Mr. Chulo, I’m already married.”
“Even if she wasn’t she wouldn’t marry you,” Lil’E snapped.
“Well, will you marry me? You can become Lil’E Chulo. You like that, huh?”
Lil’E rolled eyes at him. “I’m not sure if you know your ABCs.”
“Is that sumthin new?” Angel asked.
“Ms. Angel, nowadays you gotta make sure that, a, your man don’t have an attitude, b, no baby mama drama, c, not a convict and, d, don’t like dick.”
“Oh my God! Baby, did you hear that?” Angel asked her husband.
“Yes, I did. What up, Papi? I know you know the a, b, and c. What’s up with d?” he teased.
“Man, Mr. Kay, that is my cue to leave. I’m Audi 5000.” Everyone laughed as he whizzed out the door.
“Lily, don’t forget our doctor’s appointment tomorrow,” Angel reminded her.
“I’m not. We’re gonna take separate cars, right? Because I gotta hit those two Philly stations for interviews.”
“That sounds like a plan as long as you have someone with you.” Angel was being overprotective as usual. “And make sure you go straight home and chill out.”
“Don’t worry, Ms. Angel, I will. Later, Mr. Santos.”
“Be easy, Ma.”
Lil’E left, closing the door behind her. Angel walked over to Kaylin, stood in front of his chair, leaned over seductively, and kissed him.
“Mmmmm,” Kaylin moaned. “What was that for? And why am I seeing you for the first time today?”
She kissed him again, this time longer and harder, making her pussy wet. “Which question do you want me to answer first?”
“The latter.”
“I went to visit Trae, I had that meeting with Puma, then I spent the rest of the day working at home. And this kiss was to let you know that I’ve been fantasizing about sucking your dick all … day … long.” She kissed him hungrily, leaving no doubt in his mind that she was definitely ready to fuck. When she wasn’t getting the response that she would usually get, she slowly stood up, placed her hands on her hips. “What’s up? What’s the matter?”
“I want you to save all this pussy for me until tonight.”
“Noooo,” she whined. “I wanna suck your dick.” She pecked him on his lips. “And fuck now.”
“What’s the rush?”
“When you ready to fuck, I don’t offer you any resistance, so why am I getting some? Plus, we’re having company tonight.”
“Who?”
“Your son. I told him I would pick him up tonight.”
“What! Malik! Awww, that lil’ nigga … sumthin gotta give,” he joked. “That lil’ nigga always blockin’. Why does he have to spend the night? What’s his excuse this time?”
“I promised to let him go to the Lamaze class with us in the morning.”
“Aww, hell nah. I might as well stay my ass home and let him take you.”
“Kaylin, I’ma ask you to stop acting like a big baby. What are you going to do when the baby comes?”
“It’s a girl, that’s different.”
“Boy, stop it.”
“Yo, for real, though, me and Malik gonna have to talk.”
“Let me find out you’re jealous of a six-year-old.” When he didn’t say anything, she tried not to laugh. “Awww, baby.” She hugged him and patted him on the back like you would a baby. “You’ll always be my baby, okay?” She kissed him on the lips. “Be good and after you tuck Malik in, Mommy’s gonna give you sumthin really nice.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Oh yeah.”
His mood changed to somber. “Come here.” He held his hand out and she took it. He pulled her gently onto his lap. “There’s sumthin I’ve been wanting and needing to talk to you about, but I had to wait until I looked further into the situation before I told you. So, before I begin, please keep an open mind, hear me out, and draw on the faith that you have in me, your husband, who needs you to understand what I’m up against.”
She got comfortable in his lap, while looking at him with skepticism. “All right, talk already before you scare the shit out of me even more. Baby, you know that no matter how crazy I get about things, or what the situation is, I’ll always have your back. Now what’s up?”
“The people that came to the crib,
yo, they are made men. We worked for them. When we thought it was our attorneys who got us back over here and scott-free, it wasn’t. It was them. We got snagged up in Mexico when we were over there, overstepped our boundaries, and they let it go until now. I need you to trust me. I gotta do sumthin that comes with some … risks.” He cleared his throat.
She glared in his eyes. “All I’m hearing is risk, Kaylin. That’s all I’m hearing. What do you mean risk?”
“Risk, baby. You know what that means. I can’t sugarcoat or change the meaning.” He watched Angel as she got up, walked around the desk, and plopped down in the chair in front of him.
“Fuck,” she spat. “I think I would have been better off if you had kept this little bit of information to yourself.”
He shrugged his shoulders. “You damned if you do, and damned if you don’t. You just said you had my back no matter what.”
“Don’t get smart, Kaylin. Look at this shit from my point of view. I take ‘risk’ to mean that one day I’ll get a phone call saying, ‘Mrs. Santos, you can come and identify your husband’s body.’ Baby, I take ‘risk’ to mean, Mrs. Santos, you have been served an indictment for three hundred kilos of … whatever. Jump in here anytime, Kaylin. I take ‘risk'—”
“Angel, I asked you to trust me on this. I didn’t want you to hear this from anyone else.”
They were staring each other down. Kaylin hoping for some understanding, Angel wishing that they weren’t having this conversation.
“Come here, baby.” She remained seated. “Come here, please.” She wouldn’t move. Couldn’t move. He stood up and made his way to her. He pulled her up and hugged her.
“Why did you tell me this, baby? I’m trying … I’m honestly trying to digest it to be positive. Tell myself everything’s gonna be all right. But damn, you gave me a little too much to swallow. What’s our options, or do we have any?”
“Yeah, move out of the country, go into hiding. But, baby, come on. I’m asking you to, I need you to trust me on this one and to be positive.”
“Well, answer me this, if all goes well, is it over? There won’t be anything left that can be held over your head? And are you going to be here when the baby is born? Is that sumthin I have to worry about, Kaylin? Because if you’re not going to be here when the baby is born, then I don’t wanna hear nothing else you got to say.”
“Ma, I can promise you I’ll be here when our daughter is born. I can’t believe you’d even ask me that. You don’t have to worry about anything. I really need you to trust me on this. Don’t I always come back to you?”
“So far, baby, but—”
“No buts. Trust me on this one. You know Daddy will never and can’t leave his Angel. Come on now.”
As she thought about it a little more, a small smile crept up on her lips. “And you know I’ll always have your back, baby. But that doesn’t stop me from worrying.” Her voiced cracked even though she tried to stop the tears from falling.
“Miss Angel, your mother’s on line three and she says it’s urgent,” Bobbi’s voice surged over the speakers.
Angel immediately reached over the desk and pressed line three and then hit the speaker button. “Ma, is everything okay?”
“Your sister is here, and if you don’t come here now, I’m going to call the police. I honestly don’t know who this child is. She had the nerve to tell me to ask you for a thousand dollars, that it was important. And, Angel, her face is all bruised up. Looks like she got run over by a Mack truck. And she hasn’t been here a good three hours and two of my credit cards are missing. I don’t know whether to cancel them or let her keep them, because she looks like she’s been living in the streets … and she’s so skinny.” She choked up.
“Oh my God, Mommy. Tell me you’re joking.”
“I wish I was.”
“Hold her there until I get there.”
“She said she’ll pay you back and for you to wire it to her because she can’t stay. She only came by to get some clothes and money. The clothes she’s wearing look as if she’d been sleeping in them.”
“Tell her I’ll give it to her but I’m not wiring it. I’ll bring it down. I’m on my way, Mommy.”
“Please hurry,” Mrs. Smith pleaded.
Angel looked at Kaylin, disgust and hurt all over her face. “Let me lock up my office. Call Malik and tell him sumthin urgent came up and if I don’t get back too late I’ll swing by and pick him up.” She stormed out of Kaylin’s office, forgetting to disconnect the speakerphone.
By the time they made it to Trenton, it was almost eight. Kaylin pulled up into the driveway and turned the engine off. “Hey.” He turned Angel’s face toward his. “You gonna be all right in there?” He gazed into her eyes, looking to see something.
“I hope so.”
“Red, you are eight months pregnant. I don’t want any arguing or fighting. Your sister is going to do what she wants to regardless. Do you understand?” She nooded yes. He leaned in and gently kissed her lips. Angel sat back into the seat, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath, not knowing what to expect. Kaylin opened the door and helped her out.
Mrs. Smith was standing in the doorway with the door cracked.
“Hi, Mom.”
“What are y’all doing sitting out there? Come on in.”
“I was trying to tell your daughter not to get all worked up. You know how she can get.” He leaned over and kissed Mrs. Smith on the cheek. Her eyes were puffy and he could tell she was crying.
“How are you, Kaylin?”
“When my wife stresses, I stress. How are you? You need anything?”
“A strait jacket. That girl in there is trying her damnedest to drive me crazy. I want to commit murder.”
“You can’t let her do that. I know it’s easier said than done. Especially since I only have a six-year-old and one on the way. What do I know?”
They watched Angel head straight for Carmen’s bedroom. She knocked and eased the door open. Carmen had just got out of the shower and was getting dressed. Angel came in, shut the door behind her, and locked it.
“Why did you lock my door? Don’t think I’ma let you hit me again. Pregnant or not I’m hitting your ass back.” She smirked.
It took every ounce of strength she had to remain calm. Carmen’s left jaw was swollen and discolored. Her eye was healing. It was bloodshot and all around it was black. Her lips were still swollen. To make matters worse, the way she was fidgeting and the glaze in her eyes let Angel know that she was high.
“Who did that to you, Carmen?”
“Look, I’m not in the mood to have you playing twenty questions. I don’t get into your business so stay the fuck out of mine,” she spat.
“What business do you have, Carmen? You are only seventeen.”
“Why do you give a fuck?”
“I don’t believe you. You are my sister, Carmen, that’s why I give a fuck. Why can’t I care about you?”
“Why start now? Are you gonna loan me the money or not?” she asked impatiently.
“Not until you tell me where you been and who did that to you. Do you even care or think about how much we, especially Mommy, have been worrying about you?”
“Angel, please. Mommy only worries about you. She doesn’t give a damn about me or Mark. That’s why he never comes around. So that’s why I won’t be around either.”
Angel was shocked beyond words by that statement and was beginning to look at Carmen as if she were sprouting two heads.
“Close your fuckin’ mouth, Angel. You know this is true.”
“I can’t believe you said that.”
“Well, I said it and please believe it.”
“And please believe that you and I both know that that is not true. You’re just using that as an excuse to run the streets and get high.”
“Oh, it’s true. It was always, Angel is doing so good in school, she’s going to law school, she pays all of the bills, if it wasn’t for her this family would be naked and out o
f doors. Angel, Angel, Angel!” she spat. “She was acting like you were her only child, and God’s glory. And you, you didn’t care about anyone but yourself. You couldn’t wait to up and leave. Then when you left it was still Angel this, Angel that, she sends me money, she bought me a house, she gotta a good man, she’s getting married, she lives in a nice house. Ugghhh … I hate hearing your name,” she screeched through clenched teeth.
Angel was trying to hold back the tears. She was beginning to see just how sick her sister really was. “All of my struggling was for you and Mark as well. You benefited just as much as anyone else, if not more. Not just Mommy, Carmen. So you can save all the theatrics and just keep it real. If you was feeling like this, why didn’t you ever say this before?”
“What for? You and Mommy were so in love with each other. Y’all couldn’t've cared less about what I said or did. Plus, it’s too late now. I can’t front anymore. I hate your uppity ass. You may be the apple to Mommy’s eye but you wasn’t shit to me then and ain’t shit to me now.”
Angel shook her head in disgust. “That is such bullshit. You need to stay off the fuckin’ drugs, Carmen. The drugs are eating up your brain cells. You are really sounding stupid.”
“Say what you want. Are you gonna give me the money or what?”
“Not until you tell me who did that to you and where you have been.”
“I got into it with my man. Okay? Now are you gonna give me the money or what?”
“What kind of man would beat a seventeen-year-old’s ass?”
“You should know. He used to beat your ass.” Carmen regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. She didn’t even see Angel get up off the bed, but she was now standing in front of her face.
“What the fuck are you trying to prove, Carmen? Don’t you see Keenan ain’t shit? He’s using you to get at me, Carmen.”
“He doesn’t want your stuck-up ass. I’m younger, prettier, and my pussy is much tighter, you bitch!” Carmen shrieked as she shoved Angel, and on instinct, Angel smacked her.
“Angel, open the fuckin’ door,” Kaylin demanded as he banged on it.
“Yeah, younger and dumber, Carmen. Perfect to turn your dumb ass out.”
