by R. J. Blain
In an act founded on defiance, I propped my feet up on the coffee table. “Elevated,” I reported. With everyone’s attention on me, I drummed my fingers on my mate’s back, pretending I was playing the piano, an instrument I had no idea how to actually play. “Since no one likes my cookies, I guess I’ll have to go with story time.”
“Blood loss,” Frank muttered, and with a heavy sigh, he sank down next to my feet near my mate’s head. “It’s the blood loss. Has to be. And shock. Nicolina, if he’s bothering you, I’ll remove him to his room and lock him in.”
My mate spat curses, which I chose to ignore. Profanities beat her helpless sobbing. Some things I couldn’t lessen, and killing someone was one of them. I hoped I could either tire her out or at least stem the tide of her tears until her mother and father arrived.
Maybe she was my mate, but her parents possessed the real magic she needed. I’d be there for her, but I didn’t share what she shared with Desmond and Wendy. I never could.
I drew a deep breath and sighed. I understood. I had been in her shoes so many times, watching the life dim out of someone’s eyes, killing so I wouldn’t be killed.
I had also killed to protect, and I would again. When I could get her alone, I’d tell her of those times, letting her into secrets I hesitated to share with even Alex. It wouldn’t lessen her pain and anguish, but maybe it would help her carry the burden until she accepted what she had done for the sake of another.
“Once upon a time, a girl met a boy and she probably liked him a lot. But the big, bad wolf wouldn’t let the girl and the boy get together. She probably thought it was a stupid rule, a pointless restriction—something designed to embarrass and control. She probably resented her choice being taken away from her. Worse, she resented having some man tell her who she could or couldn’t be with. So, why bother asking? It was easier to do what she wanted.”
Alpha meant more than controlling my wolves. It meant I had to be the one to try to make things right for all of my pack—even the members who weren’t bound to me with the magic tying me to my wolves, although for the moment, I only had Frank. I shivered at the memory of them. I was responsible for not only the Fenerec, but for their mates, their puppies, and their other loved ones.
Placing my wolves into Desmond’s care didn’t change that.
I would address my mate’s actions and Simon’s death at the same time. It was all I could do.
“What she didn’t know, because I made a mistake, was that the boy had already gone after another girl at the lodge. The boy had his clock cleaned by the other girl, reminding the big, bad wolves that tiny and female doesn’t mean weak and that snowmobile helmets can be used as weapons. I don’t sacrifice puppies to rutting males incapable of being courteous to young ladies. I won’t put any puppy in that situation, ever. Each and every one of you deserves better than that.”
The only member of my audience I paid attention to was Kelsey. She met my gaze, and for the first time since I had met her, she didn’t avert her eyes, trembling as she faced off with my wolf. I leashed him, forcing him back so his pressure wouldn’t drive her away.
I didn’t smile; I wouldn’t belittle Simon’s death, but I hoped Kelsey could somehow tell I held no ill-will towards her puppy—if her puppy had been the one to let him into the house. Her eyes widened, her lips parting though she said nothing.
“When I make mistakes, people get hurt. Because I made them, Simon was able to get into the house. Because I made them, he fought with Alex. Because I gave guns loaded with silver to two people trained and licensed in their use, Simon paid for breaking the rules with his life. Alex was lucky he wasn’t killed. I didn’t build this house to control you. I didn’t make these rules to restrict you. I made them to stop history from repeating itself. I built it to protect you. That’s my responsibility. You’re all my responsibility. I built this house for you.”
Until I got close to Holly, I wouldn’t be able to tell if Kelsey’s puppy was grieving for her lost mate. She likely was. Strong, courageous, independent Holly wasn’t much different than my Nicolina. It would take a lot to drive her into hiding. I hadn’t seen her cry since she’d been five.
I could explain, I could listen, but I couldn’t heal broken hearts. No one could. If she had genuinely wanted Simon, who had been seeking his mate for years, it was possible a bond had formed between them.
Of all of us, his death had probably hurt her the most.
We were all going to need therapy before the night was out.
“Richard?” Amy swept into the room to take the other arm of the couch next to Kelsey. “Can I interrupt?”
“Of course.” Settling into the soft cushions of my couch, I arranged my mate better on my lap, peeking into my robe to check on her. She hissed and cursed at me until I covered her up. I reached for the back of the couch and grabbed the blanket draped there, pulling it down so I could spread it over her.
If my mate wanted to hide, I’d let her for as long as I could.
“Poor girl,” my brother whispered in my ear. “You know it’s bad when she considers you a safe haven.”
I huffed, but said nothing.
Simon had been my wolf, my Third, and she knew it. So long as I held her, she knew I wasn’t going to reject her for doing what was necessary—I hoped. I’d never reject my mate, no matter what.
“Before Richard came along, the pack’s Alpha didn’t care what his wolves did during the full moon. There was a pack hunt, but otherwise, everyone did exactly what they pleased,” Amy announced, lifting her chin. “Before Phillip, I was married to a cop. He was killed in a car accident. I’d been a widow for three months before the first full moon of winter. That fucker performed the ritual on Phillip and let him loose.”
I drew in a deep breath, though I kept my attention on Kelsey, Amy, and my mate. All I could smell was dismay and growing fear and horror from the scents of the Normals and Fenerec-born puppies listening in deathly silence.
“Phillip was everything I thought I needed at the time; he made me feel like a woman again. Little did I know it would become a permanent arrangement. I didn’t have a clue what a Fenerec was, and his so-called Alpha didn’t care a bit for the Normals caught up in the rut of his wolves. I became another trophy among many. Worse, I was too old to breed and make new puppies for his pack.”
Kelsey flinched.
She, too, had first mated during his reign, I remembered. She had been a young beauty, and the years had refined her. Reaching over to her, I rubbed her bulging belly and was rewarded with a tiny foot kicking me. She covered my hand with hers and squeezed.
“Since Richard came with his baby brother, no more women have been attacked. He…” Amy stared at the floor, swallowing visibly as she fought to compose herself.
“I executed pack justice on the wolves who took mates against their wills. The ones who were abused, like Phillip, got off lightly,” I said when Amy remained silent. “I made him swear to take care of his mate and treat her like the goddess she is, of course. You don’t want to know what happened to the willing participants. If I could have torn down this mountain along with his house, I would have,” I snarled.
“Gently,” Frank chided, nudging my leg with his elbow.
“He rebuilt the pack,” Amy said, still refusing to lift her eyes from the floor. “What’s here today wasn’t here twenty years ago. He put an end to uncontrolled courtships. He refused to let our babies become fodder for rutting wolves. Some of us are Normal, some of us are Fenerec-born, but we’re not castoffs, not anymore. Especially me, who couldn’t have any children anymore. So we have rules, but they’re for us.”
“It was me. I did it,” Holly whispered from somewhere behind me.
Alex jumped to his feet, whirling around. “Holly.”
“Come here, girl,” I ordered, letting my wolf out to make it a command she couldn’t refuse.
Her breathing hitched with her tears. I tilted my head back to watch her come. She approached the back
of the couch, her eyes wide and her face pale. I sniffed, fighting to isolate her scent among so many in close quarters.
I couldn’t until she was close enough to touch.
While faint, the lingering hint of Simon’s scent clung to her, overwhelming the cinnamon of her heritage, which was far weaker than my mate’s telltale scent. I patted the arm of the couch. “Sit, Puppy.”
Once again, I leaned on my wolf and bound her to my command. Tears streaked down her cheeks as she obeyed. There’d be a lot of lonely nights ahead of her, her body craving Simon and what only his touch could provide. I’d seen it before when Fenerec died, leaving me to console those left behind.
Nothing but time or a new mate could heal her, and I’d do everything I could to help her survive it. I held out my arm for her, ignoring the throb from where my mate had shot me. While she hesitated, I waggled my fingers at her. “Silly puppy, come here.”
Smaller than the average Normal man and far smaller than most Fenerec, I really wasn’t equipped to deal with two girls at one time, especially when my mate refused to be dislodged from my lap. I ended up with Holly pressed to my side. I shuddered in reaction to the pain in my arm. When I held her close enough I could get my mouth near her ear, I whispered, “It’s not your fault. Your mate was stupid. It won’t make it hurt any less, but you’re a tough girl. If you’re sorry, you’ll help your mom with her new puppy and you’ll let me find you a new mate, one who’ll take care of you like you deserve. And no, I’m not going to tell your mother and father he was your mate. That’s for you to do when—if—you’re ready.”
Unlike Nicolina’s quiet weeping, Holly’s sobs tore through her until I thought she’d crumble to pieces as I held her. I had to use both hands to keep her from collapsing on top of Nicolina. My mate stiffened, her hands clutching my shirt.
Holly wrapped her arms around my neck in a death hold, her tears hot on my throat and shoulders. I sighed.
Grief didn’t need such an audience. “Frank, Kelsey, Nicolina, and Amy, stay. The rest of you, go watch a movie in the theatre.”
“Richard,” my brother protested.
“Alex, go.”
He grumbled, sighed, and muttered curses at me under his breath, but obeyed, helping the other adults herd the puppies out of the room. Once they were gone, I considered how I was going to deal with Holly and my mate.
Frank solved the problem for me by peeling Holly off me. I saw his nose flare as he breathed in Holly’s scent. Taking on a green shade, he scooped Holly up and carried her to the armchair, settling her on his lap, rocking her back and forth. I relaxed, and reached down to rub my mate’s back while peeking into my robe again.
“Mine,” she hissed at me.
Unable to help myself, I smiled at her and let my robe close over her. Heaving a heavy sigh, I rested my head against the back of my couch, staring at Kelsey. “Hell of a night. Want cookies?”
William’s mate reached out and took my hand, setting my palm against her belly. Lifting her wrist, she checked her watch. I sucked in a breath at the tensing across her belly. She didn’t say a word, arching a brow at me.
“You were right, Frank. I should have kept my mouth shut. How many minutes and how long?” Exhaustion and elation warred with each other as I wondered how I’d get through an early labor when Kelsey’s mate was not nearby.
“Four-One-One,” she reported.
Amy snorted, and it took me a moment to remember what Kelsey meant. Four minutes between contractions, one minute duration over the course of one hour. Sighing, I slumped against the couch. “No rest for the wicked. Up, Nicolina.”
“Don’t wanna,” my mate mumbled.
“Suck it up, Miss Desmond. You get to go punch in your fancy emergency code while I trot myself upstairs and see if I can get the helipad cleared off.”
“It’s already clear,” Kelsey said, smirking at me. “Alex did it last night when the first contraction hit. And as if you’d clear off the helipad after being shot. Men!”
“You bitch. You didn’t tell me!” I made throttling gestures at William’s mate. “Damn it, Kelsey, that’s not funny.”
“I learned my lesson with my first born. Fenerec-born babies are stubborn. Nicolina, don’t bother getting up. You just stay there if he makes you feel safe. He does that to all of us. The baby’ll come along when she’s good and ready.”
I could smell the faint sourness of a lie in the air.
“She? Already decided it’s a girl, have you?” I frowned, wondering if I should call her out on her lie. “You’re waiting for William,” I stated, narrowing my eyes at her.
“Damn fucking straight I’m waiting for William.”
~~*~~
When a Normal and a Fenerec mated, the unexpected happened. Sometimes delivery proved easy, quick, and relatively painless in the grand scheme of things. Because True-born children happened, we didn’t dare to use ultrasounds.
We couldn’t explain away a human mother bearing a wolf puppy.
To make matters worse, Fenerec-born children either came to term or didn’t; preventative medication didn’t help. If the bitch’s life was in danger, I called in Inquisition doctors from the United States.
Thankfully, while it was harder for us to reproduce, severe problems were rare. Miscarriages were more common, something I faced year after year with hopeful couples. On a bad year, there were no births at all. I’d only seen a good year once since becoming Alpha. No pairs lost their puppies, and by the time the twelve of them had been born, I had been worn as ragged as the bitches determined to bring their little ones into the world alive.
For Normal and Fenerec-born mothers, the first four months proved life or death for their puppy. For Fenerec bitches, every month after the first or second mattered until delivery, and it fell to me to protect mother and puppy.
Kelsey was blessed with an easy labor. Trouble showed her face three minutes after the first little girl was safely delivered. Amy bit her lip so she wouldn’t laugh.
I cracked first, snorting in my effort to contain my good humor. After meeting my mate, I wouldn’t wish twins on anyone. With the job of cleaning babies and dealing with their cords, I cooed at the little girl I held, wrapping her in a baby blanket before handing her over to her mother.
“Perfect little puppy number one,” I said, kissing Kelsey’s sweaty brow. “Good work.”
Amy handed the second girl to me, shaking her head. “You’re not done yet, Mr. Murphy, and neither are you, Mrs. Brooks. Are you hiding any more in that belly of yours? Going for a full litter?”
Kelsey spat curses at Amy.
“Breastfeeding, bottle, or both?” I asked, cradling the second girl in the crook of my left arm.
“Don’t ask rude questions, Richard,” Amy snapped.
“Amy, she has twins. While she has two breasts, I don’t think she’d appreciate having an infant latched on every moment, waking or not,” I retorted. With my most dignified sniff, I continued, “I ask because I, in my infinite wisdom, happen to have a pump. I also have bottles, formula, and other things babies might require.”
The intercom buzzed, and careful not to jostle the baby, I headed across the room, pressing the button. “Yo.”
“Yo?” Frank demanded. “What the hell, Richard?”
“Let me in,” Desmond demanded.
“First floor only,” I replied, unlocking the front door remotely and shutting off the intercom. “Kelsey, may I kidnap your second born?”
“Guard her with your life,” she demanded. “And bring her back for her feeding or there will be hell to pay.”
I snorted. “Was there any doubt? I’ll be back with her—and hopefully your mate—very soon. Come along, Nicolina. Guard my bitch and puppy, Frank.”
“Roger,” Frank replied, saluting me.
My mate hurried over, staring at Kelsey with eyes so wide I worried they might pop out of her head. I punched in the code for the first floor, sending Nicolina down the staircase first. I followed her
, cooing at Kelsey’s puppy to keep her quiet. “Hold on a second,” I hissed at my mate. Once the door was closed, I smiled at her. “Come here.”
Nicolina glared at me. “What?”
“You okay?”
Her scent betrayed her distress long before she replied, “No.”
“Good. No one would be after that. I told Holly this, and I’m telling you this. It’s not your fault. You did exactly what you were supposed to. My only criticism is the fact you held onto the gun and scared the liver out of all of us.” Before she could reply, I nipped her neck. She sucked in a breath. “Now, go down there, act like everything is okay for a few minutes, lure your parents off, and have a nervous breakdown, as is proper and appropriate. I will use the newborn puppy to distract everyone else.”
“But I hurt you.”
“You’ll have to try harder than that to get rid of me. I told you. You’re mine. Claim it as one of your victories. I will be quite proud I survived your very good attempt to rid the Earth of me. Scoot, woman, before Desmond tries to figure out how my house works, fails, and starts tearing holes in my walls.”
“You mean holes in my walls.” She wrinkled her nose at me, and acting more like her vibrant self, she headed down the steps. Reaching over her shoulder, I punched in the code to open the bottom door.
A cacophony of voices in the entry and gusts of cold air warned me of a lot of trouble in the form of cranky Fenerec. The stench of anger bit my nose.
“Shut the door, you cretins,” I bellowed.
It took Desmond less than fifteen seconds to barrel down the hall. When he caught sight of Nicolina, he skidded to a halt, his eyes widening as he took in his daughter’s tear-splotched face, red eyes, and breathed in the scent of her misery.
“What have you done to my puppy?” he snarled.
“I did nothing. Please take her into your capable paws with your mate. Raise your voice to her even a bit, and I’ll wipe the floor with you,” I swore. Drawing a deep breath, I boomed, “William better be here and he better get his mangey tail in here this minute.”
