Did she think he’d walk away from what was as much his responsibility as hers? Yes, she’d said she was on the pill. So what? He was always a responsible lover. He should have used a condom. He always did.
Except with her.
Hell.
Nick let go of Alessia, swung around and took a long breath. Who was he kidding? Not taking her that night would have been impossible. He would have died unless he could have undressed her, kissed her, buried himself deep inside her…
Merda!
Sex was the last thing he should be thinking about right now. He’d got himself into a mess. Now, he had to find a way out and yeah, he had to find a way out of it for her, too. What was that old saying? It took two to tango.
And it sure took two to make a baby.
Well, then. It took two to deal with whatever came next. She might not like it, might consider his input another intrusion, for God’s sake, but she’d have to accept it. He wasn’t going to let her do otherwise.
“Okay,” he said, doing his best to sound calm. “Okay, what we need to do is discuss this calmly. Very calmly, because—”
He turned toward her and his heart damned near stopped.
For all that imperious air, that “do not touch me” coldness he’d seen in her when they’d first met, what he saw now was the woman he’d come to—to care about. Care about? Even now, his muscles taut, his mind racing like a hamster on a wheel…even now, he wanted her, wanted her as he had never in his life imagined wanting a woman.
Her expression was defiant but her eyes were filled with fear. She was trembling even though the room was warm and he thought of how easily he could stop those tremors, stay her tears by taking her in his arms and kissing her, kissing her until she clung to him.
A groan of despair caught in his throat as he walked past her, out the door and out of the villa.
Hands in his pockets, head down, Nick climbed the hill behind the house. The sun was setting; shadows had accumulated in the olive grove, turning the trees into otherworldly creatures with long, lean bodies and spindly arms. The hoot of an owl added to the seeming strangeness of the landscape and to the confusion in his soul.
No way could he go on blaming this on Alessia. He was as responsible as she, maybe even more. He’d seen to it that she’d forgotten everything the night he’d brought her here, not just the birth control pills but the world outside.
He was the one who’d planned everything.
Planned? Nick barked out a laugh.
Some planner he’d turned out to be. A house. A bed. His stupid brain hadn’t gone beyond the necessities. And a supply of condoms should have been part of those necessities. He’d known that since he was, what, thirteen, sitting through the embarrassment of a sex-ed class, then snickering over what it all meant a couple of hours later with his brothers.
He kicked at a small stone, watched it tumble downhill.
The simple truth was that sex had been the only thing on his mind. Having Alessia. Making love with her. Making her his, as if sleeping with a woman marked her as a man’s property.
A man didn’t make a woman “his” unless he married her. And marriage was a million light-years away.
You could double those light-years when it came to having kids. Kids were not part of the plan. The best he’d concede was that maybe someday he’d want them, but for now…
No kids.
They weren’t in Alessia’s plans, either. Not from what he’d seen when he’d opened that bathroom door. Her tears. Her disbelief. No, clearly she wasn’t in the market for motherhood.
She was young. Beautiful. So damned beautiful, with the world waiting for her to explore it.
Calmer now, he knew that whatever she decided to do—terminate the pregnancy, go through with it and keep the baby, go through with it and give the baby up for adoption—her world would never be the same again.
And it was his fault.
Nick stopped walking, tucked his hands in his pockets and gazed up at the sky. Night was coming on quickly. A handful of stars flamed against the dark blue canopy; a fat yellow moon was rising on the horizon.
Amazing.
The world changed but life went on. And, yes, his world had changed. No matter what choice Alessia made, he’d always know he’d been the reason she’d had to make that choice. He’d always know that he’d created a life that had ended before it began. Or that strangers were raising a kid with his genes, his DNA. And even if Alessia decided to keep the child, it would not have a father.
Yes, of course, he’d acknowledge the kid and support it. Maybe he’d even visit. Or maybe not. Maybe she wouldn’t want his daughter to have only sporadic contact with the man who was her father in only the most scientific terms. His son or his daughter, yes, but somehow it was easier to picture a little girl with Alessia’s features, her golden hair, her blue eyes…
What was that?
A car was coming up the long drive that led to the villa. A car, at this time of evening? Why should a car…
It was a taxi. It had to be. Who but a cabby would stop outside the house and blast his horn like that? It was the loud, impolite, “I’m here—where are you?” language of cab drivers everywhere.
A taxi.
Nick cursed and raced for the villa. “Dammit,” he said as he ran, “dammit to hell, Alessia…”
The front door opened just as he reached it. And yeah, there she was, overnight bag in hand.
She was leaving him. Leaving him! How dare she? Did she really think she could take a step like that without first asking him if he’d let her go?
He stood at the foot of the steps, fists planted on his hips, eyes hot with anger.
“Where in hell do you think you’re going?”
Alessia narrowed her eyes, gave him the same sort of princess-to-peasant look she had at the airport a million years ago.
“Get out of my way, please.”
Please? He snorted. The “please” might as well have been a four-letter word.
“Signore Orsini. I asked you to—”
The taxi horn blasted. Nick shot the cabby a furious look, then turned back to Alessia.
“You are not to move,” he growled.
She laughed. Laughed, damn her, and came down the steps. He caught her arm, leaned down, his face an inch from hers.
“I’m warning you, princess. Do not take another step.”
“Who are you to give me orders?”
“I’ll tell you exactly who I am. I am Nicolo Orsini. And unless you want to find out what that means, you will not, under any circumstances, move from this spot. Capisce?”
“How dare you give me orders? I am a princess. I am descended from kings. And you—you—”
Nick kissed her. Hard. Deep. He forced her head back and she gasped and struck him with her free hand and he caught that hand, brought it behind her back and went on kissing her until she moaned into his mouth and her lips parted to the possessive thrust of his tongue.
Then he let her go.
She stood motionless as he trotted down the steps, dug out his wallet and stuffed a handful of bills into the cabby’s extended hand. The taxi roared away. Nick stood still for a couple of seconds before he returned to confront Alessia.
“Where,” he said grimly, “did you think you were going?”
“It’s none of your—”
“You tell me you’re having my baby. Then you turn tail and run.”
She drew herself up. “What is this ‘turning tail’ thing?”
“It means you were afraid to stay and face me.”
“I am not afraid of you. I was—I was simply going away.”
Nick folded his arms. “I’ll ask you again. Where were you going?”
Where, indeed? Alessia swallowed hard.
“Away.”
“You’re going to have to do better than that.”
“You do not have the right to—”
Nick clasped her shoulders again, his touch harsh.
“I have every right! Where were you going? What are your plans?” His mouth twisted. “Dammit, that’s my child you’re carrying.”
Her eyes flashed with bitterness. “Are you sure?”
Okay. He deserved that. Nick took a deep breath.
“Just give me a straight answer. What are you going to do about the baby?” His eyes met hers; he could feel his anger draining away. “Listen. This isn’t easy for me, either. Talk to me. Tell me what you’re thinking, what you want to do.”
She went on glaring at him. Then, suddenly, the fight seemed to go out of her and she slumped in his hands.
“I don’t—I don’t know.” She looked up at him, eyes pleading for understanding. “Do you think I can decide something like this in an hour? In a day? My life has changed, Nicolo. Whatever I do, nothing will ever be the same again.”
It was exactly what he’d been thinking in the olive grove. Everything had changed for him, for her. Forever. And, just that quickly, his anger was gone.
“Come here,” he said softly, gathering her to him. She fought him, but only for a second. Then she gave a little hiccup of a sob. His arms closed tightly around her; she laid her head against his chest.
“You’re right,” he said, one big hand gently stroking her hair. “Nothing will ever be the same again for either of us. We have a decision to make, princess, maybe the most important decision of our lives.”
Alessia shut her eyes. Nicolo’s touch was so soothing. She longed to wind her arms around his neck, let herself lean into him, let his strength seep into her.
She didn’t. She couldn’t. This was a time for rational thought, not for dreams. And letting herself fall in love with this man had been a dream.
He was not hers. He never would be. But it was a comfort to know she had not been wrong about him. He was a good man. A kind man. That he had refused to let her leave, that he spoke of the decision that came next as having to be made by them both, even that he was holding her now with such tenderness, proved it.
But it didn’t change the fact that their relationship was over. What else could it be?
“Alessia. Come inside. We’ll sit down, have some coffee, talk about this.” He tipped her face to his. “We can work this through, sweetheart. You’ll see.”
She let him hold her hand and lead her into the villa, take her straight through it to the terrace at the back and out into the warm night. How fitting that they should come outside to discuss what would happen next. She’d sat outdoors on a warm Tuscan evening a few short weeks ago with her father. It was where she had first heard the name Orsini.
Who could have imagined that Nicolo Orsini would become her lover? Who could have imagined his child would lie sleeping in her womb?
Nicolo led her to a love seat, drew her down next to him, held her hands so that they faced each other.
“So,” he said softly.
She couldn’t help offering a little smile.
“So,” she said.
Nicolo freed one of his hands, used it to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Tell me what you’re thinking. About what you want to do next.”
She took a deep breath. “There are public clinics. Private doctors. Abortion is legal in my country.”
“But?”
“But, it is not a good choice for me.”
“You want to have the baby.”
She nodded.
“And then what?”
Alessia caught her bottom lip between her teeth. This part wasn’t as clear yet. She was a career woman. Was it right to bring a child into a life like hers? To raise it without a father? Or was it better to give it up for adoption?
There were plenty of couples who were eager for a child—but could she do that without wondering about her baby for the rest of her life? Was he happy? Was he well? And yes, already, she thought of the baby inside her as “he,” a little boy with Nicolo’s features. His dark hair. His beautiful eyes.
“And then what?” Nicolo said again, his voice a low rumble. “After the baby’s born…what do you want to do with her?”
“With him,” she said, without thinking.
Nicolo smiled. “With him. What next, princess?”
Alessia took a deep breath. The answer had been there all along. She just hadn’t seen it clearly until now.
“I’ll keep my baby.”
“Good,” Nicolo said, gathering her against him. “That’s what I hoped you’d say.”
Ah. Now his questions made sense. He was going to offer to support the child. She didn’t want that. A clean break was best. She would work hard, earn enough money to give her baby everything he needed….
“It’s good,” he said, “because that’s what I want, too.” He cupped her shoulders, held her at arm’s length and looked into her eyes. “Alessia. Will you marry me?”
Her mouth dropped open. It made Nick want to laugh. Or kiss her and that, he decided, was the far better choice. Slowly, he bent to her, brought his lips to hers.
“Marry me, princess,” he whispered. “And we’ll raise our baby together.”
Alessia stared at him. “Marry you? No. It’s a wonderful gesture, Nicolo, but—”
“We owe this child more than a gesture.”
“I know. I mean, I understand that. But marriage…”
“Is it such a horrible thought? Marrying me? Becoming Mrs. Nicolo Orsini?”
Horrible? She fought to keep from saying the words singing in her blood, that she loved him, adored him, that spending her life with him would be the dream she’d been afraid to dream.
“Princess?”
He was waiting for her answer. She wanted to say “yes,” but could she marry a man who didn’t love her, no matter how noble the reason?
“What?” he said. “What are you thinking?”
Alessia touched the tip of her tongue to her dry lips.
“I’m thinking…I’m thinking, what about love?”
Nick captured Alessia’s lips with his. He kissed her again and again and when he raised his head, her eyes were glazed, her lips rosy and swollen.
“What about it?” he said gruffly.
What, indeed? she thought.
And then he began undressing her and she stopped thinking about anything but him.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
THEY would have a civil ceremony.
It was the fastest way to marry. Even so, Alessia said, they would have to wait two weeks.
“Tomorrow,” Nick said the next morning, as they lay in their rumpled bed.
Alessia laughed. “Impossible.”
“Because?”
“Because, this is Italia. There are laws to obey. Are there not laws in America?”
“We’re not in America,” he said, brushing his lips over hers. “We’re in Italia, just as you said. And I am an impatient man.”
“Well, signore impaziente, there is nothing you can do about it. The law is the law.”
“And you know the law, princess?”
“I do,” she said archly.
She was in public relations. She had made marriage arrangements for others. Nicolo, as an American citizen, could marry simply by filing the necessary papers. But it was different for an Italian national. For her. Banns would have to be posted for two Sundays prior to the day of the ceremony.
Nick rolled her beneath him.
“We’ll see about that,” he said.
“Nicolo. There is nothing to see. The law is the law.”
She sounded like a schoolteacher correcting a recalcitrant pupil. It made him smile. He loved her all-knowing tone, loved the slightly exasperated look on her face. He loved—he loved…
“What are you thinking?” Alessia said softly.
“Let me show you,” he said huskily, and he ended all further discussion the best possible way, with kisses, with his mouth on her breasts, with his body hard and demanding inside hers.
As he had done to find their villa, Nick made a couple of phone calls.
“What?” Alessia said.
His grin widened. “Time to shop for a wedding dress, princess.”
Her breath caught. “You mean…” She nodded at the open envelope and the papers spilling out of it. “Is that about the banns?”
“What banns?” Nicolo said and kissed her.
He took her into the heart of Florence, to a boutique he’d noticed one evening as they’d strolled the street after dinner at a small café.
“We want a dress,” he told the clerk.
The woman looked from Nick to Alessia, then at him again. “Is it for a special occasion?”
“Very special,” Nick said solemnly. His arm tightened around Alessia’s waist. “We’re getting married tomorrow.”
Nick smiled. Alessia blushed. The clerk grinned. An hour later, they left the shop with a pale pink silk dress and matching jacket, a tiny gold purse and gold stilettos.
It was dusk, and the temperature had dropped. Perhaps that was why Alessia shuddered. “Cold, sweetheart?”
She nodded and Nicolo drew her closer as they made their way to the Ferrari but the truth was, Alessia wasn’t really cold. She’d shuddered because a thought had crept into her mind. Things were moving so fast. Was Nicolo hurrying the arrangements because he didn’t want to give her time her to change her mind? Or was it because he didn’t want to give himself time to change his mind?
She shuddered again, because she didn’t want to think about it.
Nick knew he was rushing things, but he had a good reason.
Any delay and his family might somehow learn what was happening. The Orsinis, especially his brothers, were good at uncovering secrets. And if they uncovered this one, the wedding would become a circus.
His mother and his sisters would shriek with female delight and go straight into action. He’d seen it happen with Rafe, Dante and Falco. The church. The music. The reception. The cake. The menu. The flowers. The gowns. The tuxes.
And his brothers. They’d go straight for the jugular. You know her two weeks? What, did you knock her up? Well, yeah, he had. But as well-meaning as the question would be, he’d have to answer with his fists because this was Alessia and whether she was pregnant or not wasn’t their concern. She was going to be his wife, and his decision wasn’t up for a vote.
Nicolo: The Powerful Sicilian Page 14
