by Ally Thomas
***
September 2. Midmorning.
Blick’s deep voice interrupted my train of thought as he returned to the front room and I hid the book I had been reading under my backpack. It was time I got my day started. “There’s been no word. Just checked the networks. Nothing. No word from her at all. If she was alive, no one could keep her from a computer. Don’t you think, Grace? She would share her thoughts. She would find a way. She would…if she were alive. How long do we keep believing she is a…”
“Until Hell freezes over,” I spat out. I tossed my coffee cup in the sink, ignoring the sound of breaking ceramic. I gathered up my computer and notes and shoved them violently into my backpack.
I felt Blick’s presence behind me. He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. Blick was several inches taller than me so really his muscular chest hit me right along my shoulders. I patted him on the hand. “We’re not giving up. Okay?” I knew he was a sensitive soul despite his gruff exterior. He was a wolf god, a werewolf, a hellhound. And to his enemies, he was a fearsome sight. To his friends? He was big old teddy bear, and I loved him like an older brother or father.
I did not react to his outbursts. I let him do as he pleased. I had learned from my time as a vampire that one knows when to pick one’s battles. Fighting Blick wasn’t an idea I would ever execute. He was now my friend too. He needed us like we needed him. And after reading Rayea’s journals, I knew how they both cared for each other. Had I not read it, I still would have known. I saw it every time I looked up into Blick’s face, his chiseled features, his handsome dark looks. Of course, his violent outbursts of anger meant one thing; he would move heaven and earth to find Rayea. Blick had been worried about my maker ever since she had walked into Max’s bar, the Golden Skull that night trying to save J, Blick’s boss, good friend, and son of G.
Blick knew something wasn’t right. He saw the destruction. He saw the burned ashes, the blood, the clumps of Rayea’s black hair, but no body, no presence of her at all.
When she had not returned, he was beside himself. However, he knew she was in trouble. Demetri had demanded he stay with us. Had he not, I would have. I tried to hide my emotions into a stoic demeanor of a proper vampire. I tried to feel nothing about the fact that she was gone and that we were still all grieving for her. I tried to act like I did not care, but I could not do it. I thought about Rayea constantly. I comforted Blick when I could and I ignored his fits of anger. It was pointless to react to them. When he broke something in our two-story apartment, I simply went out and got a new item. Had he agreed to get his own laptop, he would not keep smashing the extra ones I had bought. That did not happen, so I went out to replace it. To date, I was on my 15th laptop and I suspected until we found Rayea, the number would continue to grow.
“I’ll see ya tonight, Blick. I’m going to take Demetri’s bike, okay?” I pulled the book I had been reading from under my backpack, pushed it into his hands, snagged my motorcycle helmet, and raced to the door.
“What is this?”
“She would want the world to know. And mark my words, we will find her!”
As I closed the door, I saw the stunned expression on his face. I had given him a copy of Rayea’s online journals. The Vampire from Hell was alive and well, at least in print.
Chapter 4
Phone Conversation (Grace and Demetri)
***
“Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.” ~ Sarah Bernhardt
***
When I saw the call coming in on the bike’s dashboard, I knew whom the call was from. I clicked my Bluetooth device wired in my helmet.
“How is he?”
“Don’t you mean how am I?” I asked, teasing Demetri a little bit. I knew he meant Blick.
“How much has he destroyed this morning and yes, how are you, sweetheart?”
Demetri rarely called me by my name anymore, but I loved his nicknames for me. Often I called him by his formal name, instead of Death, the nickname he had earned as the Angel of Death, a position he had left once the Council had told him they would be processing Rayea’s journey over to the other side and that his services were no longer needed.
“He’s hanging in there. But we need a new calendar and some other piece of furniture I think.”
“That’s all?”
I laughed into the speaker. Silence surfaced on the line.
“You okay?”
“I didn’t mean to do it, on this day of all days, but I gave him a book today.”
“Okay, what’s wrong with that? I don’t see Blick as a reader. Is he?”
“I don’t know,” I answered feeling the emotion I was attempting to hold back crack into my voice.
“Sweetheart, what’s wrong? What book?”
“Lynn and I put Rayea’s journal entries together and released it as a book.”
I heard Demetri gasp. “An online book?”
“No, well yes, but also a book book. A paperback. We released it several months ago actually when I was extremely volatile. I should have told you.”
The silence grew. I glanced at the speedometer. 102. I had sped up the motorcycle, flying at breakneck speed into the overcast morning. Finally, I could not stand it. “Demetri?”
“Slow the bike down. You’re probably already out of the city now.”
I looked along the highway, seeing open meadows and a few vineyards. Napa Valley, I thought. “I’m in Napa Valley.”
“I’m not mad at you. Why would I be? I think the world needs to know Rayea’s story and I know she’d want you to share it if she could not. Telling Blick that is another story completely.”
“Okay, that makes sense. I just stepped into a hornet’s nest, didn’t I?” I pulled the bike over to the side of the road and slowly turned it around, headed back towards San Francisco.
“Maybe. But as far as I’m concerned everything is fine. I will talk to Blick. Looks like the fog is really bad today so take it slow driving back. I love you. I’ll talk to you later.”
The line went dead.
Chapter 5
Communication (Grace & Lynn)
***
“Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.” ~ Sarah Bernhardt
***
When I made it to the coffee shop, I got a text. Half expecting it to be Demetri, my heart dropped when I saw Lynn’s name pop up. I waved to Sasha, the waitress.
“The usual?”
I nodded and headed to the back of the sitting area. It was my morning ritual. Most days after I arrived at the coffee shop, I’d ordered a black coffee with two creams. Today, I politely thanked the waitress as she handed me my drink. Instead of having our usual quick chat, I opened my laptop and searched for an internet connection. Other people were lounging in comfy chairs. Oblivious that a vampire had sat down beside them. I still could not get over that realization. I greedily gulped down my coffee and thought about ordering an espresso for round two. Yeah, I was a vampire, but I had been human at one point and caffeine is caffeine. I still adored it. It did not matter that blood satisfied my soul. Caffeine ignited my brain. If I tried to cut back on blood, like I often did, then my intake of caffeine increased. And that was that. As you may expect too, the hot liquid did not burn going down my throat. I had blood boiling in my veins already. What was a bit of hot coffee going to do to me?
“You’ve read that? It’s really good. But the chic dies in the end.”
I did not bat an eye when I heard the person’s comment. I carried the paperback version of Rayea’s book, The Vampire from Hell like I had a bible in my possession. The worn copy always remained in my backpack. I had heard the punch line before and of course, I knew how the story ended. But it wasn’t the end, I thought to myself as I looked up at the person spouting his drivel.
“Oh Grace, hello, how are you?”
I grimaced when I saw who it was. T, one of Nathan’s best friends and on
e of my mortal enemies. I elected not to let T get under my skin today as he has in the past. I was done with the lot of them. I was not that scared, innocent girl who clung to them anymore. I had bigger friends; I had a real man who loved me, so what if he was an Angel of Death? He still loved me. He still wanted me. He still valued my opinions and he was kind to me. Nathan and his friends like T here? Waste of space. I wanted to drain every drop of blood from their drug-infected bodies, but I wanted Rayea by my side when I did it. Revenge would be mine and hers. Instead, I refrained from freaking out on T. I smiled and nodded to him.
“T, you are looking well. What’s new?”
“You know I can’t figure it out. You don’t look the same. You don’t act the same. Nathan really misses you. It’s been months. Do you know that?”
“That’s adorable, but I’m not interested. Why don’t you go order your coffee and forget you saw me here?”
“Forget you? Hardly! Nathan will want to know I saw you. He will want to know everything!”
Fuck me, I thought. “I get that.” I decided that it would be in T’s best interest and mine if he did not remember this moment in his life. It was a decision of working a little magic on him or showing him into the bathroom and crushing his windpipe beneath my fangs. I voted for the first option while I knew my fangs hoped I’d change my mind and go for the jugular with the second suggestion.
“Here,” I said to T. “Let me show you this. Have you seen this?” I pointed to my laptop screen with every ounce my former human side could offer. Fourteen months as a vampire was taking its toll on me. As far as I was concerned I had been a vampire my entire life. I did not need a transformation to tell me I was at home with my new self. I knew and I loved the blood more than I’d care to admit.
“You have some interesting artifacts on that screen? What’s so grand about it?” T asked as he moved in close to me. The early afternoon sun shone on his face through the window and I felt his heart skip a beat as he leaned in near me. I knew when the prey was frightened. I felt it in my bones. I did not have to learn it. It was instinctual. My entire vampire life was one sensory impulse after the other. I had no regrets for my actions at all. But the question if my maker would approve did float through my mind now and then. Was I a ‘good’ vampire?
When I wrapped my long fingers around T’s hand, I felt his fear surface. His eyes glistened and a few tears formed around the edges. The fiery effect of my deadly vampire nature on this cool morning took control of his lukewarm blood. It drilled its heat into his essence, right down to his beating heart.
“I would like to think that Nathan has forgotten me. You know?”
He nodded. He grimaced in freakish amazement as the sensation spread across his chest and up to his face. A sickening fear of unimaginable horror clutched his hand in broad daylight and T did not understand it. I did not understand it, but I knew with mortals I got my way. I controlled any being in my grasp and T was in my clutches.
“Don’t speak to Nathan about me. Don’t remember this. Instead, recall a waiter spilling hot coffee on the floor, nearly hitting you in the face with a flying spoon or something. Leave it alone, T. Leave it be.”
As he fled the shop, I watched him go. He’d probably call Nathan and explain to him some incoherent spew of insanity. He’d mention my name and remember nothing about the encounter, giving Nathan nothing he could use to find me.”
I did not want to come across Nathan, not now or ever. I was not afraid of him. Instead, I was afraid of what I’d do to him if I had my hands around his neck.
In Rayea fashion, I cracked my neck, stretched my jawbone, low and proud, and unlocked my smartphone. I read Lynn’s text.
“Talk?”
I wanted to go over a few notes I had made the night before. I wanted to ignore the thirst rising in me and I wanted to text Lynn and tell her I was in traffic, a comment she would not believe. Against all hope, I prayed she had a lead. She was Rayea’s best friend, a human, but a very cool person who got things done. We had become friends in the last months. When I could not get Demetri or Blick to hear me, she’d listen to me and I really enjoyed that. I needed someone to listen to me, especially these days. And yeah, Lynn knew I was a vampire. She knew Rayea was a vampire. Is a vampire, I should say. It was a secret Rayea had kept from all of her friends on Earth for a long time until Lynn and Ashton were kidnapped by Stephanie, Rayea’s sister, and taken to Hell. After Rayea rescued them, I had confirmed what they had suspected. Granted, they had seemed pretty cool about the outlandish ordeal and thought having a friend, who was a vampire, was amazing. Having two vampire friends was a bonus! I was surprised by this because the events they retold to me, and then reading it in Rayea’s journal later, still freaked me out. Rayea had almost killed Stephanie and had destroyed the blood god, Typhean. Yeah, you read that right. I really wish it had been the other way around, but I knew we’d find Stephanie again, if she was still alive. I hoped Rayea was by my side when we did. Anyways…as I was saying…
I motioned to Sasha for a refill and dialed Lynn’s number.
“You’re at it early.”
The sizzle in her voice never amazed me. Lynn was intense, a hard-core personality who if you were lucky enough to be her friend you were on the ‘good list’ for the day. If not, watch out. I had been through more of Lynn’s rants at the universe than I wanted to recall. “Couldn’t sleep.”
“I bet I know why. Look, I may have something. You online?” Lynn asked.
Like any respectable 21st century kid, I replied, “Always.”
“Cool. I have a link to send you. I think it’s from Rayea. It’s a posting on a website called Deadit.”
I crushed my paper coffee cup and glared at my iPhone in disbelief. I ended the call and clinched the phone as I waited for Lynn’s text message to come through. When I did not see the text, I sent her a message instead. I watched my fingers as they composed my next text and I attempted to remain cool and cool.
“Is the posting by her or about her? Is she alive?”
“I think she is! ALIVE!”
This time it was me who pulled a ‘Blick.’ I crunched my iPhone in my hands and saw the plastic, electronics, and glass fall on the table. Fuck. I paid for my coffees and asked Sasha for a phone. “It’s an emergency and my phone is broken.” A true statement, I thought.
“Sure, hun. Boyfriend troubles? I see that all the time. Smashed a few phones myself. No worries.” She smiled and pointed to the back where a landline phone hung on the wall.
“Can you meet me? I’m at the coffee shop on Beach Street, Hyde and Beach Street.” I did not start with any pleasantries to Lynn as I made my demands through the phone.
“You bet,” she said, then paused for a moment. “The one by Macy’s and Saks’, across from Union Square?
“That’s it. Can you be here in thirty minutes?”
“Fifteen!”
“Done.”
Chapter 6
Deadness (Posting by Rayea)
***
“Life is but a dream for the dead.” ~ Gerard Way
***
Posting on Deadit.com
Title: Deadness
User Name: FirenFangs11
The best way to begin this posting is probably by starting with the first day I woke up which was a few days ago. Being dead is a lot like sitting all by yourself, inside your own head. No light. No noises. No interaction with others. Nothing except blackness before your eyes. Silence. It is a far greater hell than I would ever want to wish on anyone, even my enemies.
Now as I gain access to this discussion board on the Internet, I can put my thoughts together. I can share them with anyone who is out there. I can make sense of what’s happening to me and what will become of me. Officially, and unfortunately, all I know now is that I’m dead. I still seem to be a vampire. Not sure what is up with that. Oh and I am going to have to pay for my sins. More on that later. For now I am awake, so I think that’s a good thing.
As I was saying, the deadness. Probably the one thing that kept me going during my prison in darkness was the dreams. The images of my being with a man I hope to meet someday. Maybe I have met him before. I don’t know. In my dreams, he was taller than me by several inches. I’d enjoy staring up into his gleaming gold eyes and tan complexion. His black hair framed his face nicely, and I’d giggle to myself when his long bangs fell into his eyes because his hair seemed to annoy him, but not enough to cut it. His voice was deep. A sound I dare say comforted me. When I dreamed of him, I felt safe in the darkness. I’d spend hours staring off into my black abyss, and when sleep finally took me, he was there, holding me in his arms, or sitting with me, or listening to me talk.
He rarely spoke. Sometimes he did, but I could not understand him. Mostly he’d whisper in my ear or along the inside of my neck. I did not really see him speak. It was more like an awareness. I heard his thoughts. His touch was soft and warm, very inviting. He was always so near to me when I dreamed of him. Even though I did not know his name, I knew I could trust him. I did not recognize him and that disappointed him. I wish I did know him. I enjoyed that feeling of contentment. In my hole of despairing death, I clung to that one feeling. Dare I say, I survived because of that one decision I had made, to trust the man in my dreams, for absolutely no reason except that I felt I could. When you’re in a situation like this, isn’t going with your gut feeling the best course of action you have?
I stayed like that for months, or years, I suppose. I don't really know how long it was. I just know I woke up like this a few days ago. I woke up to new challenges. New realizations. New situations. A whole lot of questions, and a room filled with walking and talking skeletons.
The kicker?
I don’t know who I am. I have no memory of anything before that first day. I woke up in a dead void, a wasteland of skeletal people or creatures of every description that surrounded me. Humans, wolves, dragons, lions, dogs, cats, large and small whose faces surfaced before my eyes, popping up in front of me like they were all, one at a time, trying to get a better view of a movie show being played. I was the main attraction when I finally became alert and conscious.
