My eyes well up with tears. This wasn’t the confession I expected at all. It was amazing that he wanted me to know this no matter the outcome. "I love you, so much Derrick." In reality, I'd known I'm in love with Derrick for a while. Neither of us had come right out and said it which left me feeling like his feelings may not be as deep as mine, until now.
Derrick's smile lit up the room. Bending down, his arms enveloped me, lifting me up off the floor as he kissed me fiercely. When he sat me down, he pushed the robe off my shoulders, replacing it with his tongue along my skin as his mouth began its exploration at my collarbone. I tugged on his belt, luring him toward the bed. Falling back against the soft mattress I opened my legs and pulled Derrick close to me. He wore a pale blue polo shirt that was keeping me from tasting his skin. Tugging it free from his pants I lifted it and made my way across his chiseled abs with my lips, darting my tongue out periodically.
His leather belt slides easily through his belt loops. I unfasten the top button of his pants and press my lips to the soft line of hair that led down to his happy place. He groaned and I felt his excitement pressing against his boxer briefs. He stood to remove his shirt completely, and then rejoined me on the bed by hovering above my body. His left hand slid up my thigh, fingers tickling my skin as they travel further north. His mouth finds mine, our tongues dance together. Derrick's fingers find the hem of my lingerie to find the other surprise awaiting him.
He groaned, "No panties? Damnit Mary Jane, I want you."
Scooting down the bed again, his mouth replaced his hand and I shivered as his lips moved their way up the inside of my thighs. When he reached my core, I arched my back at the most intense pleasure I've ever experienced.
Derrick moved the silk negligee up and pulled it over my head. His mouth instantly found my nipple next. I moaned and breathily said, "Wait, let me…let me take care of you." Not that I knew what I was doing at all, this was the most intimate I'd been with anyone. Somehow though, I felt confident in my skills as a lover.
Derrick sat up and said, "This is your first time. I want this to be the experience you never forget. Let me please you. You can take care of me next time." Who could argue with that reasoning? He stood up to remove his pants and I gulped with anxiety. He positioned himself over me once more, "You're sure this is what you want?" I nodded my affirmation silently. With a soft hot breathy whisper against my ear he says, "Let me know if I need to stop." His tongue flicked out to lick my sensitive earlobe. Then his teeth grabbed a hold of my lobe and bit down gently at the same time he pressed himself inside me. I cried out in a combination of intense pleasure and pain.
He paused to look at me for reassurance. I pressed my hands against his strong chest and growl seductively, "Please, I want you Derrick; don't stop."
For the next few hours we explored each other's bodies over and over again. We took turns pleasing the other, both reaching climax several times a piece. My inexperience didn't seem to be noticeable. Everything seemed to happen naturally. There were no fumbling or awkward moments, only moments of pure bliss. Finally we collapsed on the bed out of breath and spent.
Derrick is an attentive lover before, during, and after. He draped the sheet across my body then kissed me chastely. "I love you, Mary Jane." Before I could return the sentiment, my stomach let out a long fierce growl of hunger.
"Well that was super sexy." I said, mortified at the ruined moment.
"You must be starving. How about I order us some room service? Or would you rather go out?"
"Room service. The longer I can keep you naked, the better." I said, suddenly feeling very comfortable. There isn't much to be nervous about once someone has been that intimate with you. It was always curious to me how couples could meld so well together in certain situations. Now I realize that sex has a lot to do with that. Nothing can be more embarrassing then the faces and noises you make during sex.
"You know, I was thinking the same thing. I'm fine if we stay naked all weekend." He grinned against my lips as he kissed me again. He leaned across the bed to grab the room service menu on the nightstand. "Give me a second." He dialed the restaurant downstairs and orders us each a full meal, an appetizer, and a dessert. Normally I wouldn’t eat that much in front of a guy but I felt so comfortable with Derrick it didn’t matter.
As soon as he hung up the phone, he rolled back over to hover above me. "They said it will be at least an hour. What will we do to pass the time?" The grin on his face was sly and full of innuendo.
"Hmm…well you ordered a lot of food; maybe we should work up a bigger appetite."
His whispered, "You read my mind," before his lips found mine once more.
We were able to get in two more times before there was a knock on the door. Derrick covered me with a sheet and slipped his pants on quickly before answering the door. The waitress brought in the food and kept her eyes glued to Derrick's naked chest. She didn’t notice I was there until he turned and asked if I was hungry. The waitress's head twisted so fast in my direction, and then her hopes fell when she spotted me in my undressed state covered only in a sheet. After that her demeanor changed and she was suddenly in a hurry to leave.
Under the first silver lidded plate that Derrick brought to the bed was fresh fruit; watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew melon, and strawberries. He lifted a piece of watermelon toward me. "That's a big piece." I said, leaning back away from his hand.
"Trust me, open your mouth," Derrick said. He placed the watermelon halfway between my lips, leaned forward, and then put his lips over the other half. Biting down together, the sweet juices coated our lips as our tongues moved to capture more of the sweetness. "Damn, I'll never get tired of the taste of you." The watermelon juice dripped down, Derrick moved his tongue over my chest catching the excess juice from the fruit and making me want to forego eating.
After filling our stomachs and working the food off a couple more times, we fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms. The next morning I opened my eyes and smiled as I felt Derrick's body pressed up against mine with his arm across my stomach. This was the first time I'd waken up in bed with a man; a girl could get used to this real fast.
"Good morning, beautiful," he whispered a moment before his teeth captured my earlobe. When I rolled over to face him, he smiled brightly. "Damn woman, you're stunning even first thing in the morning." There was no way to respond to that without sounding cheesy or stumbling on my words so I pressed my lips to his instead and tossed my leg across his waist to lay on top of him. I was surprised when I felt him easily slide inside me. I gasped and sat back, the sheet falling from my body, exposing me to him. His hands roamed my breast as I moved up and down. He relaxed his head back on the pillow, closed his eyes and sighed with content.
Afterwards I moved back on my side of the bed. He leaned over and pressed light kisses along my cheek. "How do you feel?"
"Amazing." Even that word was not enough to accurately describe everything I felt in the last several hours.
"So I made your first time memorable?" He asked, with hopeful patience for the answer.
"I'll definitely never forget this, Derrick." My body certainly wouldn't forget the pleasure, my mind won't forget the way he looks, and more than anything my heart will never forget how gentle he was with me.
For the next few days we rarely left the bedroom. All our plans to sight see were gone in favor of spending all our time together without any interruptions. We didn’t spend the entire time having sex. For most of the time we talked about our favorite things; movies, music, books. Then Derrick told me about Katelyn's infant years and his struggle with being a single dad. In between our talks he'd stop to call and check on Katelyn. Derrick is drop dead sexy, sweet, funny, and mature, a perfect man that any woman would kill for. I loved all of those things about him, but the thing I loved most is seeing him with Katelyn. The thought of having a child when I was sixteen scared me to even think about. I'm not sure I could've done as well as a mother as he's done as a father. The b
eautiful thing is that he's never considered her a nuisance or a mistake. Even in the privacy of our room where he could tell me anything he wants, he admits that he never wished he'd given her up.
On the last morning of our trip, we awoke in each other's arms as usual. "This has been the best long weekend of my life." Derrick planted kisses on my skin after each word he spoke. "I need a shower, care to join me?"
"Tempting as it is, I think I'll order us breakfast. After your shower, I want to talk to you about something."
Derrick's forehead creased with worry, "Nothing serious, right?"
"Well it's serious, but not bad." I teased him with my riddles. Shoving him playfully from the bed, I say, "Go get your shower, stinky."
"Ouch, harsh." He winks as he streaks through the hotel room.
Derrick's phone rang while he was in the shower. It was Gracie's number so I answered it. "Hey Gracie!"
"MJ? I wasn’t expecting you to answer. Where's Derrick?" She sounded concerned and it worried me that something bad had happened. We'd all been through a lot of rough patches in the last year with Gracie. Her abusive stalker boyfriend Hudson tried to kill Ashton and Gracie on more than one occasion. One attempt ended up leaving a bullet wound in Derrick. Hudson is dead now, but bad luck seemed to follow Gracie a lot.
"He's in the shower. What's wrong?"
"Katelyn's sick. She's running a fever and we're at the hospital having her checked out right now. Luckily these Collins' boys are prepared and he has Ashton listed as a guardian who can approve healthcare services. I need to let Derrick know though. He thought it was a small cold when he left. He said she gets it every time the weather changes because of…"
"Because of her asthma? He told me. What's different this time? Is it serious?" I stepped toward the bathroom door listening to see if the shower was still running.
"She woke up this morning with a fever and the doctor said based on her symptoms it could be the flu or possibly pneumonia as a worst case scenario."
"Hang on, Gracie." I knocked on the bathroom door. "Derrick?"
Derrick opened the door and tugged me inside, pressing his lips to mine. "Couldn’t wait another second for me, could you?" He teased as his mouth moved to my neck.
Pushing him away gently, I leaned back and held the phone out to him. "It's Gracie."
Instantly he took the phone and panicked, "Is it Katelyn? What's wrong?" He nodded as Gracie relayed the same information to him. "I can't believe I haven't called you guys in over a day. I got distracted."
Distracted? I distracted him from thinking of his daughter and pulled him two hundred miles away from her when she needs him. This is my fault and I needed to fix it. Katelyn is the most important person in Derrick's life and she always should come first and if our relationship is interfering with that then I have to end it.
While Derrick finished his phone call, I packed his bag and placed it by the door. I heard him say goodbye and he came rushing into the bedroom. "I need to pa…" He stopped when he saw his bag sitting by the door. "Oh."
"You need to go. I'll check us out of here and take care of everything. Katelyn needs you." To say I wasn’t disappointed to end our weekend would be a lie. We would lose a few hours together but Katelyn's health was most important. While he goes home to take care of Katelyn I'll use the time to really think things over about whether or not we can even continue this long distance relationship.
Derrick wrapped me in his arms and kissed me. "I love you, MJ. Thank you for understanding. You're amazing, you know that?" I smiled and Derrick grabbed his backpack and threw it over his shoulder. "I'll call you when I get home and I'll let you know how Katelyn is because I know you'll be worried."
And once he walked out that door, I wouldn’t see him face to face again for another year. We tried to continue our long distance chats, talking on the phone every night for a little while. Things were going fine except for the fact that we missed each other so much. Then two months after our Atlanta trip and after a long conversation with Cameron, I came to a decision on what needed to be done.
With a trembling hand, I dialed Derrick’s number. It took me four tries to hit the correct name in my contacts list. When it finally went through, Derrick answered on the second ring, “Hey baby. I was just thinking about you.” The emotions I’d been holding in, spilled out in my voice. “What’s wrong MJ? Are you crying sweetheart?”
“Do you have time to talk?” I managed to ask.
“I always have time for you. What’s wrong? Hold on a second,” Derrick set the phone down for a moment. He was talking to Katelyn. He said, “Sweetie, MJ’s upset right now and needs to talk to daddy about grown up stuff. I’ll let you talk to her another time, ok?”
I heard Katelyn’s small voice say, “Maybe I can cheer her up. Please let me say hi, daddy.”
It broke my heart to know what I was about to do. Talking to Katelyn could make this decision that much harder. Even hearing her voice right now was making me question what I really wanted.
Derrick picked up the phone, “Do you mind if Katelyn says hello?”
“Of course not,” I lied.
“Hi MJ. Daddy said you’re sad right now. I wanted to come on here and tell you that I’m going to draw you a picture and have daddy text it to you. Is that ok?” How could I tell her no? Once this call ended I knew I’d never see that picture, but I couldn’t turn her down.
“That would be wonderful Katie-cat.”
Her next words tore my heart in two. “I love you MJ.” I loved Katelyn as though she were my own daughter. “Does that make you smile?”
A smile, that if seen would be heartbreaking to a small girl, spread over my face as the tears fell. “Yes, baby girl, that makes me smile so much. I love you too, never forget that.”
Derrick came back on the line and said, “She’s a great girl isn’t she?”
“Definitely. She takes after her daddy for sure.” I said.
“Yep, you know what else we have in common. I love you, only it’s probably a lot more than she does.” He whispered the last part and my heart shattered. It was too much to handle doing this over the phone. “You’re quiet, sweetheart. Did I say something wrong?”
“Nope. You never do. I’m sorry Derrick.”
“Sorry for what?”
“The reason I’m calling is that this isn’t working for me.” My confession was answered with silence. “The long distance thing, it’s too difficult. I can’t ask you to give up time with Katelyn to come see me and I can’t afford to come see you all the time either. I think it’s best if we stay friends. When my internship is over, we can explore this again if there’s still a chance for us. For now, I think it's best we don't talk for a while.” More silence. With a quick glance at the phone I knew he hadn’t hung up. “Derrick, say something, please.” Still nothing.
After a moment I heard a sniffle and I choked back more tears knowing that he was crying on the other end of the line. Nothing made me cry more than seeing or hearing a man cry. Men are supposed to be so strong, so when one cries it seems that much more devastating.
“Daddy?” I heard Katelyn’s voice call out. “Are you sad now too?”
I heard Derrick’s hand slide across the speaker as he tried to muffle the sound. It was barely audible but I heard him say, “Yeah, daddy’s pretty sad sweetheart.” He grunted as though something fell on him. He dropped the phone and then I heard him say, “Hugs from you always make it better.” His voice was still laced with such sadness though that I knew even at her young age Katelyn didn’t believe him for a minute.
A few moments later he picked the phone back up, “I’m here, MJ.” He sighed, “I want to fight you on this. I want to fight for us. The thing is I know you, and you’re stubborn. So this is my proposition to you. Take a while to think this through. In a few months, if you change your mind, I’ll be here. I’m not going anywhere and I don’t want anyone else.”
“I can’t ask you to wait on me, Derrick. You should start
dating again. You may meet the girl of your dreams.”
“I already did, she’s on the phone with me right now.” Derrick sighed again, "Cheesy but true lines aside, I love you Mary Jane. The best things in life are worth waiting for and you're worth it."
"Promise me one thing and mean it. If you meet a woman who sparks your interest, don't hesitate. Ask her out and make sure you're not giving up your happily ever after on me."
After that phone call, we went our separate ways for the most part. At first Derrick called once a week and then it fell to every couple of weeks. After a while we kept in touch through Gracie only. It was odd the way things changed so quickly. One day he called me asking if he could come see me. There was no way I could let him do that though so I told him no. It's as though that set things straight for him. The next time I called him he was cold and aloof.
I missed Derrick but there was nothing I could do about it. He needed to be with his daughter and I needed to finish my internship. Our lives were on different paths now. We both had come to terms with that and were moving on.
Chapter Nine
**Derrick**
It was a nice spring day, the first after a long bitterly cold winter that saw way too many single digit temperatures for the South. The weather was warm with a nice cool breeze, a perfect day for fishing. Sitting on the dock, I cast my line out first. Ashton took a seat next to me and cast his out next. Fishing with him is something we did as kids with our father running the show. Being a single dad, I didn't get to go much anymore. Gracie was kind enough to take care of Katelyn so that we could enjoy some brother time.
Ash took a deep breath and let out a sigh of delight. “Last time I was here was with Gracie. You know she fell in and my fishing pole was tugged under by her catch?” I listened to him, but every time I heard Gracie’s name I thought of MJ and it made it hard to concentrate on anything else. He didn’t seem to notice my lack of interest in his story. “In a few years I want to bring Autumn and teach her how to fish. You should bring Katelyn sometime. She’s at the right age.” I nodded, still staring ahead at the water battling the thoughts in my head. The next words he spoke, stirred something inside me. “Gracie is going down to Florida in a few days. You should think about going with her. Spend some time with Mary Jane. I know you miss her.”
Curves in the Road (The Southern Devotion Series Book 2) Page 6
