Dark Lust: An Alpha Billionaire Romance (Books 1-5)

by Kira Matthison

Book 3: Treacherous Lust

  Chapter 16

  Lily

  I was aching with how much I needed him. There would be bruises from his fingers on my hips, but I didn’t care—more than that, some depraved part of me wanted this. I wanted his mark on me.

  Slut. Chris’s voice echoed in my head and I stiffened.

  “Lily?” Donovan’s voice had changed. His hand came to rest in the small of my back and he tugged the blindfold down. “Are you all right?”

  I looked down, trying to catch my breath.

  “Lily.” He slid onto the couch and pulled me down. His arms were firm around me, but gentle. His fingers lifted my chin so he could meet my eyes.

  “Chris said…” My voice trailed away. I had hoped he would interrupt me.

  He didn’t. He was going to make me say it out loud.

  “Chris said it was shameful of me to sleep with you so soon after him.”

  He raised an eyebrow, and I knew he was thinking about everything Chris had done.

  “I know,” I said, nettled. “I know it doesn’t make any sense. He’s the one who—” I buried my face in my hands. “But he was always so ashamed of me,” I whispered. “And every time I talk to him, I remember it and no matter what I say, it all gets turned around and—”

  “Then don’t talk to him.” Donovan was smiling when I looked up. To him, it was the simplest thing in the world. “Ever again.”

  I looked away with a sigh. “I can’t just cut him out of my—”

  He took my chin in his fingers and pulled my face around again. “I said,” he told me softly, “don’t talk to him every again.”

  “But you don’t understand—”

  “That’s an order, Lily.”

  I blinked. “What?”

  “I told you there would be rules. This is one.”

  “Why?”

  His lips curved. “See if you can figure it out. In the meantime…” He pulled me close, tongue thrusting into my mouth and his lips hot on mine. He gave a growl of satisfaction when I melted against him. “You are mine,” he whispered, when he tangled his hand in my hair and pulled me a scant inch away. His eyes were burning. “You are mine. Nothing you do to obey me is shameful. You were made for me, Lily.”

  I wanted, more than anything, to believe him.

  I couldn’t.

  “Why do you even want me?” I whispered. “I’m not elegant. I’m not—”

  His fingers tightened in my hair and he shook my head slightly. “Not only will you not speak to Chris, you will not say his words. Do you understand me?”

  I broke off, swallowing.

  “Chris,” he murmured softly, “never knew what he had. I do.” He stood, holding me easily against his chest before depositing me gently on the floor. There was nothing gentle in his eyes, however. “Come with me.”

  It was another order, and I obeyed it without question. I followed him to the bedroom and shivered while he drew my clothes off entirely. His breathing was harsh, and when he stepped away at last, his chest was heaving.

  “Hold your hair up.” His voice was rough. “Turn around. Slowly. I want to see all of you.”

  I closed my eyes as I turned. I could feel myself blushing fiercely. When I thought of the women he must have slept with, women with personal trainers, with perfect bodies, with money and diamonds and thousand dollar high heels and blonde hair, it was difficult not to run away. No one had ever wanted to see me like this.

  Or had they? For the first time, I began to doubt. Had Chris really been right about everything? About how the other guys made fun of him because I wasn’t pretty enough? About how he was ashamed of me all the time?

  I opened my eyes, and the look on Donovan’s face left no doubt of what he thought.

  I moved as if in a dream. I was at his side a moment later. My fingers trembled as I unbuttoned his shirt and undid his belt. I undressed him carefully, aware of his eyes on me, skimming my fingers over his skin when I dared. Muscles rippled, smooth and hard, under my touch. I let my fingers drift over his knuckles when I drew his shirt off.

  “What is it?” He was smiling.

  “You’re a boxer.” I looked up at him. “Right?”

  “Yes.” He smiled and drew me close for a kiss. He seemed pleased.

  But his face changed when he broke the kiss, and I shivered. He was looking at me now like I was prey…and he was on the hunt.

  “Bend over the bed.” The order was almost careless. He was already turning away; he didn’t check to see if I obeyed.

  I did, though. I was shuddering with sudden fear. I jumped when his fingers brushed against my back, trailing down over my ass and along the sensitive skin of my thighs.

  “What are you afraid of, Lily?”

  “Disappointing you.” The answer came too quickly to deny.

  He gave a quiet laugh that set my blood on fire. “Good.”

  A blindfold, a real one this time, slipped over my eyes and the world went dark. I could hear him moving nearby, but I could see nothing. My fingers tightened on the coverlet, and when I heard the whistle in the air, there was no time even to turn my head. The whip hit the backs of my legs almost lightly, but hard enough to leave a line that stung. I jumped and gave a gasp.

  “Say you’re mine, Lily.”

  “I’m yours.”

  Again, the whip fell; again, I gave a little cry.

  There was nothing I could do to anticipate it. He was clever, never falling into a rhythm I could pick out, waiting until I began to relax and laughing when I jumped. The first lines of pain along my skin disappeared, but a deeper ache began to grow. My skin was tender all over, and time the whip landed, I cried out. It was pain, I knew that—but I wanted it as much as I shrank from it.

  He was behind me suddenly. His fingers slipped inside me without warning, without asking—taking me casually. Already yearning for him, I felt something in my core ignite. My hips rocked back against his fingers and I heard my own moans mingle with his laughter. His fingers disappeared and I whimpered, but he thrust inside me the next moment with an oath, sheathing himself deep.

  “Don’t move.”

  I tried to obey, but my hips wouldn’t stop. I cried out when he slapped my ass hard.

  “I said don’t move.”

  How I held myself still, I didn’t know. It was torture, having him inside me and being unable to move on his cock. My breath came in whimpers.

  The touch of his fingers shocked me. He probed up, to another opening, lube cool against my flesh. I clenched involuntarily.

  “You’ll make it harder.” It didn’t sound like he cared much either way.

  “I don’t think I can—”

  “I told you I’d take your ass.” He drew away for another slap, but then his fingers were back, with something else this time. Cool plastic pressed at the opening and—I gasped—slid inside me. I shuddered and he laughed.

  He took his time, sliding it in and out, a little deeper sometimes, and sometimes shallow, circling my ass before he slipped it back into me. I lost myself in it, eyes drifting closed under the blindfold. I had never felt anything like this before, him inside me in two places. It felt…

  Right.

  “Your hips are moving again.” He wasn’t angry any longer. “You’re asking for more. Do you want more, Lily?”

  The fear returned, sharp. He was almost too big for me—how could I take him?

  “What’s…more?”

  His fingers were at my neck, yanking me up for him to whisper in my ear.

  “Whatever I say,” he said simply.

  He released me down onto the bed and took me hard, then. He thrust deep, harder even than he had fucked me in his living room, and I lost myself. I was crying his name, begging for more, desperate for the feel of him inside me.

  He stopped long before either of us was done, and the toy was back at my ass, or—

  Bigger. A different toy, one that gave a touch of pain as it slid inside me.

  “Fuck yo
urself on it.” The order was rough. “Do as I say, Lily. Take all of it.”

  Some part of me had questions, but something more, deeper, wanted nothing more than to obey. My hips were moving before he’d stopped talking. I took it as deep as I could and drew away, biting my lip. But I couldn’t stop. I rocked my hips back again, and again. I was riding his cock and the toy, both, and I couldn’t stop, I couldn’t stop.

  I couldn’t stop. When at last I felt his fingers at the base of the toy, I cried out.

  “Good girl,” he breathed. “Good girl. Perfect, Lily. Do you want it again?”

  “Yes.”

  He fucked me with it, the toy meeting my thrusts. He took my ass with it, his voice whispering encouragement as my cries grew.

  “Fuck. On the bed.” He drew away, the toy still in my ass, and flipped me over onto my back. I couldn’t see him, but a second later he pulled my knees apart and sheathed himself in me again.

  I could feel him everywhere as he fucked me this time. His chest pressed against me as he thrust, his hips held mine down, the toy was his reminder that he could have me anywhere, any way he wanted. The backs of my legs were still sore from the whip and I wrapped them around his waist to pull him deeper. He was everywhere, lips hot on mine, tongue thrusting into my mouth. I couldn’t see him, but I could feel him. I was writhing on his cock, crying out, whimpering.

  “Donovan—Donovan, please.”

  “Please what?”

  “I’m going to come. I need to come.”

  “And?” He slammed into me, driving me against the bed.

  “Don’t stop.” Don’t ever stop.

  I felt his rush of satisfaction.

  “Come.” A harsh order. His hands grabbed my wrists and pinned them over my head. “Come on my cock, Lily. Show me how much you like it when I take you everywhere.”

  “God, yes.” I so close. I jerked my arms against his hold, instinctively, and new I could never move him.

  It was that, that tipped me over the edge. Taken hard in every way, blindfolded—and held down. I came so hard I saw stars, and I was screaming his name, not even caring if anyone else could hear. I hoped they did. I hoped they knew how much I loved this, how much I didn’t want it ever to stop. I shuddered around him and his lips were at my ear, breathing words that only made me come harder:

  “You’re mine, Lily. In every way.”

  The hot water stung on my skin. I patted myself dry and turned to look at myself in the mirror. I bit my lip at the faint lines of red on the backs of my legs. They would fade soon, I knew, within the day. For now…I liked seeing them.

  I was gloriously sore this morning. I was also a bit overawed. Waking up in Donovan’s apartment had been a surprise. I sat up to sun streaming in the windows and silk sheets soft on my skin. Donovan was gone, and a fluffy towel was laid on the bed.

  A sound outside made me jump and I wrapped myself in the towel before peeking out of the bathroom. Donovan, sweat shining on his skin, gave a smile as he came into the bedroom. His knuckles were red. He’d been boxing.

  “You’re up—good. There’s breakfast in the kitchen. I’ll be there in a few.” He pulled me to him for a kiss, one that made my knees go weak, and gave a low laugh when I whimpered slightly.

  It was a disappointment to put my clothes on. I wanted to go back to that bed and feel silk on my skin. Instead, I had an old tank top and a skirt. I resolved, for the first time I could remember, to go shopping. How long since I’d picked out something for myself, for how it would feel or how it would look?

  I couldn’t even remember if I’d ever done that.

  I was spreading jam on a bagel when he came out of the bedroom. He was perfectly dressed, once again, in a grey suit with silver-and-blue cufflinks. He smiled as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

  “So.”

  “So?” I was blushing.

  “It’s time we talked about the rules.”

  I paused, bagel halfway to my mouth.

  “I told you there would be rules.” He smiled, entirely at ease as I bit my lip. “I even told you two of them last night. Do you remember?”

  Last night came back to me in a rush, and I felt my face heat. Then I remembered what he meant.

  “Never to speak to Chris, and…” I cleared my throat. “Never to say the things he said to me out loud.”

  “Good.” He nodded. “In addition, you will tell me where you are at all times. When you arrive, when you leave. There will be no negotiation on this point, do you understand me?”

  I swallowed and nodded. I understood. I just wasn’t sure if I agreed.

  “Now. If I tell you to leave somewhere, you will obey me immediately, is that clear? You will keep your phone on you at all times.”

  “Why do you get to decide these sorts of things?” The words burst out of me before I could stop them.

  “Because I am the one who knows the risks.” His voice was flat. “And because I say so. Because you are mine.”

  Defiance kindled, somewhere deep.

  He must have seen it in my eyes because he was there, my hair in his grasp and my head wrenched back.

  “Mine,” he repeated. His fingers tightened. I was squirming, but there was no getting free. “Will you follow the rules, Lily?”

  I couldn’t see anything but his eyes, and there was no warmth there. I struggled uselessly, and he kissed me hard, his tongue thrusting into my mouth before he pulled back to bite my lower lip. He released me and I swayed. My fingers brushed over my lip.

  “Will you follow the rules?” he asked again.

  “Yes.” I didn’t understand how he could go from hot to cold in a moment like this.

  When I looked up, he saw the question in my eyes.

  “If you’re with me,” he told me simply, “you’ll have to accept it. I’m not someone who’s going to tell you everything—or most things. I’ll tell you what you need to know.”

  Every instinct told me to cut and run. I was wavering when he cupped my face in his hands.

  “I will never harm you,” he told me seriously. “Do you understand? I will keep you safe. But you have to do as I say.”

  I swallowed. My nod was jerky. “Yes. Okay.”

  “Good girl.” He kissed me.

  My phone buzzed and he smiled as he released me. He went to get a pastry, waving at me to answer it.

  I didn’t recognize the number. “Hello?”

  “Lily Harris?” The voice was ever-so-slightly accented.

  “Yes. Who is this?” I saw Donovan look up in interest.

  “This is Officer Moua. We met the other day.”

  I couldn’t think of anything to say to that. I waited, holding the phone, my heart pounding in my chest.

  “Ms. Harris, I need to talk to you. I have reason to believe that Donovan White may be involved in the death of Chun-mei Ko, and that you may be able to tell us information that could help us find her.”

  Donovan was staring at me, his eyes hard.

  “I’m not sure.” I tried not to meet his eyes.

  “Miss Harris, this woman deserves justice.” The officer’s voice was hard. “Do you not agree?”

  “Of course, I—”

  “Then help us find her. If Mr. White is innocent—” his tone made it clear that he strongly doubted that “—there will be no danger in it for him. Trust me.”

  “I see.”

  “Come down to the fifth precinct office,” he instructed me. “Do not tell him where you are going. Make sure you are not followed.”

  A chill traveled down my spine, and I hung up with a muttered goodbye.

  “Who was that?” His tone was too casual.

  I opened my mouth to tell him the truth, and a lie came out: “One of the people in my class is insisting we need a study group for this test.”

  The test I hadn’t studied for. I couldn’t bring myself to care, though—school had never seemed less important.

  “Don’t go if you don’t want to.”

 
“Bei will want me to.” The lying came too easily. “And since I’m staying with her…”

  “You should be staying here.”

  “It’s fine.” I met his eyes, and saw the order in them. “Please. It’s fine. After everything, I just need…” Something to stay the same. Anything.

  He hesitated. “For now, then.” He held up a hand. “I make no guarantees. If I think you’re in danger there, you’re coming to stay here.”

  I nodded. It was hard to argue with that. “All right. I should go, though. The test is on Monday and we’ll be meeting a few times.”

  He nodded easily.

  “I’ll…see you again soon?” I didn’t know what to say. I still wasn’t sure what this was—just that, as I stared at him, I felt desire welling up in me.

  “Oh, you will. After all…you still have so much to learn.” He stayed where he was, but his eyes said he knew how my blood was heating under his gaze. He knew how much I wanted him.

  That was what made him dangerous. I forced a smile and left. It was a struggle not to run.

  “Miss Harris. Thank you for coming to see me.” Officer Moua was stiff and formal as he came into the tiny room. “Would you like any coffee? Water?”

  “Coffee, please.”

  “Of course.” The coffee machine was just outside, and he poured me a styrofoam cup of it and came back to place it in front of me.

  “Thank you.” I wrapped my fingers around it and savored the warmth. It was cold in this room—probably by design.

  Officer Moua sat down and fixed me with a clear-eyed stare.

  “I’m going to be honest with you, Miss Harris. You’re involved with a man who might be a murderer.”

  I tried not to swallow, but my fingers tightened around the cup. “I don’t believe that,” I said.

  Did I? I wasn’t sure. When I was with Donovan, it seemed impossible that he could have killed someone. When I wasn’t…

  “I see.” He did not seem particularly surprised, though his lips tightened slightly. “Are you aware of his involvement with a man named Sheng-li Tat?”

  What did he know? If I were to lie, and he knew I was lying… I nodded slightly.

  Officer Moua opened the folder he had brought in and slid several photos across the desk to me. It was unmistakably Sheng-li, with Donovan in two of the pictures. I looked, not sure what I was supposed to be seeing.