a novella
by
* * * *
Smashwords Edition
* * * *
Promise Me Forever
Copyright © 2014 by Sarah Ashley Jones
Cover design by Sarah Hansen of Okay Creations
Edited by Stacy Sanford
Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above author of this book.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
For other titles by Sarah Ashley Jones, visit Amazon
Table of Contents
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Epilogue
The Lost Scenes
Playlist
Acknowledgements
About the Author
This book goes out to my writing partner, one of my best friends, and my peanut butter to my jelly.
Michele, if it weren’t for you, I would be in the loony bin and this book would be in the trash bin.
Thank you for all your continued support and love and for keeping me grounded.
This book also wouldn't have been made into what you are about to read if it wasn't for all the late nights and long talks with my amazing Alpha Reader, Melissa.
Thank you for everything you have done for me over the last few months. Your support means so much to me!
Sunlight shone through the newly hung sheer drapes above the sliding glass door, filling the bedroom with a soothing blanket of warmth. My bare legs extended in front of me, causing the comforter to puff underneath them. I leaned back against the solid headboard and shut my eyes while basking in the rays of light that danced over my exposed skin. Despite the last few weeks of constant rain, it was a gorgeous spring day - just warm enough to wear a dress and not need a sweater.
Sucking my lip into my mouth, I bit down hard to try and contain my growing excitement. It took everything I had to sit still. I wanted to get up and jump around and scream like a crazy person. I’d waited for this day to come for a long time.
Turning to the side, my gaze drifted to the framed picture of Cameron and I at our high school graduation. A new kind of smile fell over my lips. It was one tinged with sadness, but also a little contentment, too. There was a time I thought I would never be completely happy again, but I proved myself wrong. My heart may have been a little bruised, but it was full of love, passion and new found adventure. There would always be a place for Cameron in it, but I realized it didn’t need to be a sad one.
I studied his smile, the way his shaggy golden hair poked out in an unruly mess under his purple cap, and his unzipped matching gown that exposed his ‘epic’ rule-breaking casual attire of jeans and a t-shirt. He held his diploma up in the air with one hand while the other draped across my shoulders. I stood right beside him, my arms wrapped around his waist, in my white cap and gown and matching heels. I remembered in that moment, I didn’t want to let go. There were some days I wish I didn’t. Maybe if I’d held on a little longer, he would be beside me again. But then I think, maybe a little selfishly, that if he were still here I would never have gotten a chance to start living the life I always wanted.
“I did it, Cam,” I whispered into the still room. “I’m happy.” A chill shot down my spine and I drew my legs up into my chest, resting my chin on my knees. I was happy. So happy that sometimes, I couldn’t help but question if I deserved everything that was happening to me, but my reassurance always lay in the fact that between Cam and I, I was the lucky one. I was the twin who got a second chance, and because of that, I made the choice to listen to only my heart – not my head and not my parents – just my heart that only beats for one person.
It was somewhere between the fight with my parents and the walk to Jhett’s door when things changed - I changed. I decided to live my life exactly the way I should have all along - for me - and it all started with finding my way back to the hippie-looking yellow house and the maroon door in hopes there was someone waiting for me on the other side.
I inhaled deeply as I stood before the bright door. There was one single piece of wood standing between me and my uncertain future. With shaky fingers, I reached out and pressed the doorbell; anxiously counting down the seconds until I would be forced to find the words to express everything I felt in my heart but could never admit out loud.
Jhett appeared in the doorway looking just as broken as I felt. Our eyes met, and I saw their usual glistening amber hue was gone. He hurt. I could tell with once glance.
We stood there unmoving as we stared at each other, and the uncomfortable stillness in the air could be felt all around us.
“Hi.” My voice was almost unrecognizable when I spoke. I inhaled an unsteady breath and prayed he would say or do something, because there wasn’t much holding me together anymore. It didn’t feel like I was standing in front of the same man I once knew…that man was long gone. In his place stood an empty shell of the man I loved and it was my fault.
Jhett’s lips parted as he started to speak. His forehead creased a little more each second longer he stared at me, but no words ever came. Instead, he shifted his weight uneasily from one foot to the other.
The familiar prickling sensation of hot tears overwhelmed my senses. I knew there was a risk coming back to him. I knew that not every story had a happy ending, and the idea that my story might be one of them was something I honestly wasn’t prepared for. I bit my lip and looked down at the concrete patio, my leg bouncing in anticipation.
Jhett reached down, cupped one finger under my chin and lifted my gaze back up to meet his. The man looking down at me was no longer the stranger who opened the door. I finally recognized Jhett – my Jhett. As his hand moved to my cheek and his features softened, his signature lopsided smirk made its long awaited appearance. He traced a path across my warm flesh with his thumb while his eyes darted back and forth to my lips, to my arm wrapped in its yellow cast, and finally ended up staring back into my eyes.
I leaned into his palm, needing to feel more of him around me. My free hand landed on top of his and I pressed it harder into my cheek. Jhett’s lips lightly grazed my forehead, making my heart beat wildly in my chest.
My eyes shut as I simply took in the moment unfolding around me. I was satisfied. I knew that whatever happened next didn’t matter as long as I could remember the moment just that way - his hand burning into my cheek while he flashed his smile that could melt me into a puddle in mere seconds.
The raw emotions flowing through my veins made me feel alive once again. If the next thing out of his mouth was I can't do this, at least I got to feel his love one last time.
Jhett’s warmth pulled away from me, sucking any idea of hope away with him. My body already missed the close contact, but it didn't have to wait long to feel it again. His warmth returned as he threaded one arm around my waist and pressed my body close to his; lifting my feet up off the ground. With one fluid movement he had me over the threshold of the front door and standing in the foyer of the house.
I heard the door click shut behind him but I wasn’t looking in his direction. The sta
te of distress the kitchen was in was painful to see. The disaster that stood before me was mesmerizing; I couldn't look away. The beautiful, happy oasis we once found in the kitchen was trashed. Chairs littered the hardwood floors amongst shards of glass that sparkled in the sun filtering in from the window. It was a dangerously beautiful sight.
In the battle that must have took place between the house and Jhett, Jhett won. I imagined him coming home from the hospital after the spoon fed lies from my mother and not knowing where to turn next. It was as if he tried to rid himself of everything that reminded him of me. From the looks of it, almost everything in the house must scream my name when he sees it. I understood that. Memories of us were all over. You didn’t have to look for them either; they were felt, too.
It was Jhett’s turn to grab my hand and embrace me, just like I’d done in the same hallway what felt like an eternity ago. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders, trapping my one good arm underneath his as I gripped onto his shirt tightly, not ready or willing to let go. With my head tucked under his chin and my cheek resting on his chest, I became undone in his arms. The tears came without warning, and he did the one thing I needed so badly. He held me tighter and let me cry.
Neither of us spoke. There was no need for hushed words or soothing voices. Being together was enough to start the healing we both craved. My body shook as I sobbed into Jhett’s chest, only vaguely aware of the same stifled sounds also coming from him. All the tears I cried in the hospital had nothing on the ones that flowed down my face. There was something different, something more satisfying, about crying with the only other person in the world who truly understood your pain.
I broke free of his grasp and propelled myself upward. The impact as my lips crashed down onto his was both surprising and welcomed. No hesitation was left in either of us. He needed me just as much as I needed him.
Heat rose up from my toes and through my belly, but this time it was different; it was deeper than anything I’d ever felt before. It wasn’t the attraction for Jhett that caused the fire anymore. It was the knowledge that neither of us was perfect, and yet we were perfect for each other.
With one deep breath through my nose, I broke the kiss between us and raised my hand to Jhett’s face. My fingertips blazed a trail from his jaw, up his cheek, and into his dark hair. I smoothed back a few rogue hairs and relaxed my stance as our foreheads came together.
A smile finally teased the edges of my lips as I looked down the bridge of my nose and into Jhett’s eyes.
“Hi.” The sound of his voice filled my ears, putting me completely at ease.
“Hi,” I answered, and the world fell back into place around me.
Tears continued to roll down my cheeks as we stared at each other; taking one another in as if it was the first time we’d ever been so close. I wanted to say so much more than hi. I wanted to tell him how sorry I was for everything I put him through. That I forgave him and that I wasn’t planning on leaving like that ever again, because I loved him with every fiber of my being. But when I opened my mouth to tell him all of those things, nothing came out.
His eyes darted back and forth over mine, and the crease in his forehead slowly faded as his boyish smirk tugged at his lips. “Kiss me,” he whispered, his face so close to mine his breath tickled my cheeks. There was no fight left in me. Without hesitation, I did as I was told.
Rolling onto my toes, I let my mouth explore his; the salty taste of our tears mixing together on both our tongues. Every emotion I’d kept bottled up inside during my stay in the hospital came crashing down - from hate, to love, to lust, and finally trust.
I guess that was how I knew I was wrong in thinking I loved Jhett before that moment. I thought I’d already fallen for him because I needed him around to be happy, but standing in the middle of the trashed house, I truly fell in love. I realized that you don’t love someone because you need them, you love them because you choose them. I wanted him to be a part of my happiness, and what made it even better was that he chose me, too. That was love.
Jhett’s lips left mine and he pulled his arms tighter around my waist. A soft mew of pain escaped my throat, but I refused to let him release me. My ribs were still sore, but I didn’t want the embrace to end.
“You came back.” His face nestled into my neck.
My eyes squeezed shut at his words, and my heart weighed heavy with the thought that he believed he might not ever see me again. “No,” I whispered. “I came home.”
His hands moved to the sides of my face, forcing me to look up at him, as if I could ever look away. “I love you, Charlie. More than you will ever realize.” His thumbs caressed my wet cheeks. I should’ve told him I loved him too, but my voice was completely gone from the constant crying. It didn’t matter though; he didn’t wait for my reply. He scooped me up into his arms and made his way down the hall and to our bedroom.
I stole one last glance over his shoulder as he passed through the doorway, taking in the wrecked remains of Jhett’s emotional wrath in the kitchen, before looking back up into his amber eyes. He was my proof that broken pieces didn’t always remain that way. I knew, because I wouldn’t let them.
The wooden door to our bedroom wasn’t made for eavesdropping. Charlie’s hushed words were impossible to make out through the thick wood. I wasn’t spying on her; I know I could’ve just knocked and gone right in. But that wasn’t the ‘right’ thing to do. So instead I stayed trapped outside with my ear pressed to the door, hoping to catch some kind of audible clue as to what she was doing or how she felt, but I got nothing.
Sighing, I pushed away from the door and turned until my back hit the wall next to me. Why was this so hard? That was a stupid question. It was hard because it was Charlie and she was the only woman I’d ever met who could make me act like this. She was full of unexpected surprises, and that in itself made for interesting outcomes from otherwise normal situations.
I rubbed the back of my neck and slid down the wall; my arms resting on the tops of my knees when I finally reached the floor. My head hit the hard surface behind me. A few months ago I sat there with Charlie, but things were much different then.
After she came back to me, she wasn’t the same. She appeared healed to everyone else; she was good at fooling people. But I wasn’t everyone else. I was the one that was there every night when she woke up in a cold sweat and screaming. I was the one who listened to her cry in the shower when she thought I couldn’t hear. I was the one that couldn’t fix her when she broke down over things I couldn’t understand.
I imagined Charlie sitting on the bed and I wanted nothing more than to be on the other side of that door. She was okay alone in there, I repeated to myself. The rational side of me knew this was the case, but the other side of me wanted to make sure. The last time I let the door separate us was a day that would stay engraved in my mind forever. It was the day she almost slipped through my fingers for a second time, but also the day I promised her she would be mine forever.
I stilled. A strange muffled shout came from behind our closed bedroom door. It could be heard even with the sounds of the TV in the living room. I set the knife down on the counter and listened.
It happened again, only the second time was much louder. Our late lunch would have to wait. I crept towards the bedroom as an uneasy feeling washed over me. It was the middle of the day, and the last time I checked on Charlie she was asleep.
Another noise, this time a pain-filled groan that echoed through the house. My fingers wrapped around the gold handle and turned, but the door wouldn’t budge. Was it locked? Or stuck? The house was older, and sometimes the doors had a mind of their own.
I tapped my knuckles against the door. “Charlie?”
“NOOOO!”
My heart plummeted as her terrified shrieks kept coming without any signs of stopping. She was only supposed to be napping. Charlie didn’t have nightmares during the day. Something wasn’t right.
The bedroom door easily flew open from the wei
ght of my shoulder being thrust against it, revealing Charlie’s hunched over form in the middle of our bed. She refused to look up at the sound of my entrance, and her sobs continued to wrack her entire body. I carefully calculated each slow step, approaching her as if she were an injured animal. If Charlie was still lost somewhere between the world of dreams and reality, I knew that rushing her and pulling her into my arms was wrong, even if that was what my instincts screamed at me to do.
Cautiously sitting on the edge of the bed, I placed a hand on the small of her back. She struggled to breathe as cries tore through her defenseless body, but she didn’t shy away from my touch.
“Shhhh. It’s okay, Charlie.” She sat crying, refusing to make any sort of contact with me. “It’s just a dream,” I cooed to her like a helpless child. When she didn’t respond, I pulled her against my chest and stroked the hair that fell around her face. I rocked her in my arms; her frail body shook in my grasp. She didn’t say a word to me.
She was a fighter, but it didn’t mean she wasn’t hurt. I tried to be what she needed me to be, but seeing her come so far, only to be broken back down by losing something so important to her – to us – pained me more than she could understand. Charlie may have the rest of the world fooled, but she couldn’t fool me because I was just as broken inside.
I ran my fingers down her bare arm as it draped across my chest. She answered in mumbles I couldn’t make out. “Shhh. Everything is all right.” I repeated the same words to her every time we went through this. Neither of us were strangers to the demons that plagued our dreams.
An earth-shattering scream pierced the silence, followed by more uncontrollable sobs. I pressed a kiss onto her forehead. Sweat greeted my lips on her skin. “Wake up, baby. You’re okay.” I tried to coax her back into reality.
Her eyes flew open; the terrified look on her face made more intense by the last few minutes of eerie sunlight trickling in through the curtains. She pulled away from me and tried to catch her breath.
Promise Me Forever Page 1
