by Dawn Doyle
“Me too. I could barely focus on what you guys were talking about.”
“I saw.” He chuckled.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. You were talking about the expansion and the next thing I was imagining ripping off your shirt with the buttons flying everywhere.”
“Really?” his eyes widened and his smile grew wider.
“Yes.” She nodded.
“I was imagining a lot more than that. I was thinking about lifting up your skirt and ruining another pair of panties.”
Emily had to cross her legs with the surge of fire that flowed to her centre.
“Not long to go, baby.”
Nick started the car and they drove to the club.
They walked through the club and Nick looked happy with the progress.
Johnny and Ray walked over, noticing their interlocked fingers.
“Hundred bucks.” Ray said.
“Fuck.” Johnny replied, handing over a bill.
“What’s all that about?” asked Nick.
“I bet him that the next time we saw you guys, you’d be together. Like together together. This dipshit said you’d take too long.”
“What?” Emily asked. She didn’t think they’d given any indication that they liked each other that way.
“It’s just a bit of fun. We could tell you two were gaga over each other. Hell, you’d have to be blind not to see it.”
Johnny and Ray chuckled and then turned to each other, making lovey dovey eyes at each other and sighing.
“Hey, we didn’t look like that.” Complained Nick.
“Maybe not at the same time. Just when you thought the other wasn’t looking.” Johnny winked.
“Shut up.” Nick said and he tugged on Emily’s hand, leading her around the construction.”
“Nick, if they could tell then…” Everybody else could tell also. They hadn’t been as convincing as they thought.
Oh so what.
Emily loved him and hiding was a bit ridiculous. She knew Nick wouldn’t hurt her and so what if people thought one was using the other? They’d soon be corrected.
“Nobody else, apart form Edna and Joel, knew. Nobody has said anything to me.”
Edna and Joel had obviously spotted something the last time they were there, proving that when they’d walked into the café.
“When you were eating the crêpes the last time. I was watching your mouth and Joel nudged me before you noticed.” Nick added, his eyes on her mouth.
Emily stood on her tiptoes and softly kissed his lips.
“What was that for?” He asked.
“Because I want to and because I can.” She said, repeating his words to her.
Nick laughed, then his expression changed.
“Cora knows.” He said with a smile. Then he told Emily all of the things Cora had said, assuring him she would keep his secret. Nick had denied everything but Cora had been insistent.
So that’s what she was talking about in the café. She’d noticed it then.
Finishing at the club, the pair took off. Nick was taking her to therapy.
*****
Nick felt nervous as he pulled up outside the Doctor’s office. He was about to go through a session with Emily present. He’d gone there, last time, to introduce them and tell her what happened but now he was going to be questioned like a normal session.
“Are you ok?” She asked as they walked through the door.
“Yeah.” He stopped in the foyer and lowered his voice so Tyler wouldn’t overhear. “When we go in there, the Doc might bring up details about that night and what’s happened because of that. I don’t want you to get upset, Emmy.” He ran his thumbs over her cheeks as her blue eyes looked into his soul.
“I will, but I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me, I just want you to be ok.”
Emily was thinking about him being ok… again. Even if she didn’t know it, she was always considerate of his feelings.
When Harry had asked for more money, the rumours and the women talking about him, Rochelle’s lies, when he’d confessed his ordeal, and also not wanting people to think he was an ass by using her or being used himself.
She didn’t give herself any credit for the sweet things that she did for him.
“I will, Emmy. Ok, let’s go in.”
They entered the room and sat together on the sofa, facing Doctor Wilkinson.
“Good afternoon.” He said as they sat.
“Hi, Doc.” Nick said. He placed his arm around Emily’s shoulder and his other hand took hers.
The doctor looked between them and smiled warmly.
“I see you’ve both admitted your feelings to one another.” He said, looking satisfied with himself.
Obviously their attraction hadn’t gone unnoticed by a guy trained to spot emotions.
“Yes.” Emily replied before him, squeezing his hand gently.
“That’s great. I’m pleased for you.” The doctor clicked his pen and put it to his notepad. “So, Nick. How have things been, the past couple of weeks?”
“When we got back, I was angry. I told Emmy what had happened, the day after.” Nick continued to tell the doctor about his telling her and that Emily didn’t turn away from him like he’d feared.
Emily looked upset that he thought that. Knowing her, he realized she would never have done that to him.
“I know that what happened wasn’t my fault. It was completely out of my hands. If I had have come forward sooner, the girl would have turned it on me. I would have been punished instead and she would have continued anyway. Being in prison wouldn’t have helped anybody. Emmy helped me see that.” He turned to her and smiled, gently gripping her shoulder.
“Nick’s been coming here for a well over a year and it took you one conversation to help him. I think you may be in the wrong profession.” The doctor joked to Emily. “So how about the dreams? How often are they now?”
Nick saw Emily’s head snap in his direction. He hadn’t told her about them. He didn’t want her to worry.
“Actually, Doc, the first time I stayed with Emmy, they didn’t happen. I hadn’t taken any pills either, when I was supposed to.”
“Pills?” Emily asked. Now she sounded really worried.
“I didn’t want you to worry, babe. I’ve been on medication for a while. The Doc’s been lowering my doses but I haven’t been taking anything for a couple of weeks.”
“Do you want to talk about the dreams? Explain what happens in them?” The Doc asked and Nick wanted Emily to know. To know how she helped him more than she knew.
“You don’t have to.” She said beside him and he could see her glaring at the Doc. Clearly she didn’t want him thinking about what had happened to him any more than necessary.
Another sweet thing.
“I do, Emmy. I want you to know.” He hooked his hand round, from her shoulder, and stroked her cheek with his fingertips.
“They start when I go into the house…” He began and he felt Emily stiffen. He had to tell her.
“I walk through and the room is full of faceless people. I’m looking for Ryan, to take him home, but I can’t see him. Then a girl comes up to me saying she knows where he is. In my dream, she doesn’t give me anything but I can’t stop myself from going with her. I fight with my body to turn away, but I can’t. Like I’m outside of myself, screaming at me to run. She opens a door and everything goes black. I open my eyes and she’s on me…”
“Nick, stop. Don’t do this to yourself, babe. You’ve lived it and you don’t need to talk about it anymore than you have to.” Emily’s voice was shaky. Her eyes were tear filled and she looked scared.
“Babe… I want to carry on. You have to know the rest.” He assured her. Emily just nodded her head in resignation.
“I look up and she’s… I can’t move. Just like it actually happened. I couldn’t speak, I could only watch as she violated me. I wanted her to get off. I wanted to hit her. A young girl, and I wanted to beat her for w
hat she was doing to me. In the dream, she gets off and laughs at me before walking out the door. That’s when I wake up.”
Nick swallowed and took a calming breath. He’d been reliving what had happened to him every night before he was put on his sleeping medication.
“A couple of months ago, the dreams changed. The girl leading me up the stairs had no face too. I could hear Emmy shouting my name and I would call out for her to help me…”
Nick heard Emily’s gasp and her hand flew over her mouth. He looked at her, letting her know there was more to come.
“She couldn’t find me and the same thing would happen. But then they changed again. A couple of nights later, when it was a pill free night, she found me. I couldn’t move, but the girl was gone. Emmy held me tight and told me everything was going to be ok. I woke up relieved.”
Emily flung her arms around his neck, sobbing. He wrapped his arms around her as she cried. He felt bad that she was sad but he also wanted her to know how much she affected him, and his life.
“So, have you had any more nightmares?” the Doc asked, scribbling away on his pad.
“No.”
“And, how have you been sleeping without the pills?”
“Really well. No problems at all.” He said, stroking up and down Emily’s back, soothing her as her sobs quietened.
“Have you had any side effects from your sudden withdrawal?”
“None that I’m aware of, no.” He hadn’t felt anything other than the normal reactions to Emmy’s presence.
“So, I gather you’re in a sexual relationship?”
He felt Emily stop breathing. She turned back to her seat, red eyed and looked nervous.
“Yes.” He wasn’t about to give details so that was the only answer the Doc was getting.
“Any problems there?”
“Oh dear God!” Emily squeaked, her face flushing, and Nick couldn’t help chuckling at her reaction.
“No.”
“What about the position you were in when you were attacked. Have you done that? I’m sorry, I know that’s personal but I have to ask.”
“No.” He replied. His laughter dying out instantly. That was something neither of them had attempted. He was afraid he would freak out and scare Emily. He knew he would have to address it at some point but the amount of times he’d opened his eyes and saw the brown psychotic ones looking down at him, he hadn’t wanted to chance it.
Maybe it was time.
“Do you still have any flashbacks or other stresses from that night?” The Doc continued.
“Sometimes, but I only have to think of Emmy and they go away.”
Emily had saved him. In his dreams and in his life, on more than a few occasions. He loved her with every part of himself and he wouldn’t survive without her, that much he knew.
“Emily, how do you feel about what Nick has told you?”
Nick wanted to know too. He was anxious as to what she would say about hearing that he was on medication for nightmares.
“I feel sick.” She said, holding her stomach. “That girl… That fuckin’ slut-whore did that to him. Hurt him like that, and he’s had to live like this! Flashbacks, nightmares… pills just to be able to sleep! The only thing happening to her is that she’s cosy and safe in a mental hospital. That’s it! She’s not paying for what she did to Nick, to my sister, to her fiancé, or the others!”
Emily’s voice rose the more she spoke. Tears leaked from her eyes.
Nick reached to the tissue box on the table and began to wipe Emily’s face. Her reaction was more than he expected. Emily could overreact but the look in her eyes was terrifying.
“Nick…I am so sorry that happened to you.” She sniffled.
“It’s ok, baby, I can get past it now. I have you.”
Emily wrapped her arms around him again and Nick held her tight.
“It’s good to see that you’re progressing forward, Nick. Have you mentioned anything to your family?” The Doc asked, still scribbling away.
“No.” Nick shook his head. He still wasn’t ready for that. He wasn’t ready as he thought Ryan may blame himself for what happened because Nick wouldn’t have been there if he hadn’t. “I will, one day, but not right now.”
“Do whatever you feel is right for you, Nick. I understand it can be difficult to tell people when you think they may look at you differently or treat you as a victim instead of helping you come to terms with what happened. A lot of sufferers feel that way, as I have told you before.”
“I know. Thanks, Doc.”
After the session, Nick took Emily’s hand and led her from the office. He didn’t book another appointment. He didn’t think he’d need to go again.
“Are you ok, Emmy?” He asked her as they got into the car.
“I don’t know. I should be asking you that.” She said.
“I’m fine, babe. It really is getting better. I promise you.” He reached for her hand and held it in his. Bringing it to his mouth and kissing her knuckles.
“You really don’t have bad dreams anymore?”
“Not since the day I told you.” He smiled and waggled his eyebrows a little. Reminding her of what came after that.
Emily smiled too and he was relieved.
Chapter 21
It only took five minutes to get to their hotel and Emily was glad to be back behind closed doors with Nick.
As soon as the door was closed, she pulled him into her, cupping his head and pulling his mouth to hers.
She moaned when his tongue entered her mouth and she gently sucked on it, then licking across his lower lip before kissing him again.
“God, baby.” He whispered, walking her backwards to the bed.
Emily felt her knees hit the end of the bed and they both came down on top of the covers.
Nick paused above her, stroking her hair back and looking into her eyes.
“I’m glad I told you everything.” He said. Stroking his thumbs across her cheeks. “I wanted you to know.”
“I’m glad you told me.” She replied. And she was. Even though she felt like she was dying inside at the pain she’d caused him; Holly, Alex and the other victims too.
“The pills you took. You really don’t take them anymore?”
Nick shook his head.
“I never needed them again. Every night with you, I’ve had no problems.”
Emily’s heart swelled. If what he was saying was true, then being together had kept away the bad dreams. She wondered if taking the pills had had other effects on his sleeping.
“Did the pills stop you talking in your sleep?”
“I don’t talk in my sleep.” He said, with a little smirk.
“You do. I heard you a few times.”
“What did I say?” He asked, his eyes narrowing.
If he hadn’t known that he did, meant that maybe he wasn’t ready.
Emily felt stupid at mentioning it and she didn’t want to say anything else. She would just leave it and hope that he would say it again. Even it was only when he was sleeping.
“It doesn’t matter. You were asleep.” She said. Pulling his mouth back to hers.
“Emmy.” He whispered, breaking their kiss.
He didn’t say anything else. His hands got to work opening her blouse.
His fingers opened her buttons one-by-one and opened out the sides, exposing her red bra. Her nipples already hard, he looked over them, licking his lips.
“I am so lucky.” He dipped his head down, between her breasts and kissed into her cleavage. Up and over the swells to her chest, and up to her neck.
Between kisses, he pulled on her blouse. Slowly taking it over her shoulders and down her arms, her back arching so he could.
Emily felt the tickles across her skin as goosebumps broke out and tingles ran down her stomach, settling between her thighs.
Nick dropped her blouse on the floor and she lifted her shaking hands, trying to undo his buttons. Nick watched and waited patiently for her to
finish. She lifted up and copied as he had done; pulling his shirt over his shoulders and down his arms.
She caught a flash of his tattoo. She hadn’t seen it properly because every time she tried to see, it was too dark or he was lying on it.
She saw something red and some legs.
He noticed her looking and, with one finger, turned her head back towards his.
“You will see it Emmy. Just… not yet.” He said in his gravelly, aroused tone and her breath quickened.
She nodded.
Nick’s hands found the zipper on her skirt and pulled down. Slowly, over her hips, her thighs and then her feet, pulling off her shoes; dropping them to the floor with her clothes.
His eyed zeroed in on her matching red underwear and he swallowed. The lace fabric was sheer and he could see everything through them.
“Holy fuck, Emmy. You look fucking spectacular.”
Emily watched as his eyes took in every inch of her, laying before him, exposed.
Her hands stroked down his hard stomach, over his V-line and found his belt. Loosening it, she opened his button and zipper.
She pushed her hand inside and stroked along his hard length, causing his breath to hiss between his teeth.
“Mmmm” She moaned when he twitched in her hand, thickening further.
“All because of you.” He whispered, leaning over her.
Nick darted out his tongue and flicked the tip over lower lip. His hand gliding up her ankle, to her thigh, before reaching her butt and gripping her.
“You drive me crazy.” She whispered in reply.
Nick helped her to remove his pants when she lifted. She stroked up his muscular legs and round to his perfect rear and continued moving up until her fingertips were glancing across his upper back.
Laying back down, Emily felt Nick’s hands at her shoulders, pulling down her bra straps, reaching round and unclasping the back. He pulled that from her and threw it over his shoulder.
