My breath caught in my throat. I could taste her element like poison polluting the air. Panic rattled around my skull. Every muscle strummed tight with the need to run. It was only my stubborn need to protect Dawn that rooted me to the spot, that and my demon’s morbid fascination.
In the dancing green light, I caught sight of Ryder pressed against the far wall. Gun clutched at his side, he cringed back from Dawn but didn’t look away. I knew, without doubt, that he’d kill her if she lost control.
One of Dawn’s vines snapped at me, cracking like a whip at my feet. I flinched back as more separated from the river and peeled toward me. “Dawn...” They still came, rippling above the dance floor, eager and hungry. “Dawn?” I back-pedaled. “Dawn!”
She didn’t see or hear me. Her all-green eyes were locked on Levi’s mess, her little head cocked to one side as her tendrils knitted parts of Levi back together and then unraveled him all over again.
The slick touch of her power snaked around my ankle and tugged my leg out from under me. I fell hard on my ass. The abhorrent crawl of Dawn’s power yanked my demon out of me, plunging fire through my flesh. Dawn swung her blazing green eyes on me, dropping what was left of Levi. Blood and bone splashed across the dance floor. Her whip-like tendrils reared up behind her tiny body. Countless eels of energy hovered in the air, poised to strike.
“Dawn... I know you’re in there, honey.” My demon slur couldn’t hide the quiver in my voice. “Don’t let it rule you.” Her dark energy swelled, replacing the air with a sour, elemental soup, heavy with energies not of this world. She was so little. How was she supposed to fight the desires of the demon riding her? Her demon might have been physically small, but the power she wielded wasn’t. She hadn’t even drawn from the veil.
Her element broke free and lunged for me. I thrust out a retort of fire, blasting her back. A gut-churning scream pierced the roar of my fire. Dammit, I was hurting her. I recalled my element, and realized my mistake as soon as the eels plunged through the fizzling embers and coiled around my legs. Her element, whatever dark power it was, knotted around my limbs and tightened. This couldn’t be happening. Would she unmake me as she had Levi?
A gunshot punched through the air. Dawn collapsed with a cry. Her demon-form shattered. The black eels coiled around me splintered and dissolved, leaving behind a film of sticky black tar.
Shaking off my demon, I got to my feet and stumbled to Dawn as Ryder approached her. “Jesus, Ryder, you shot her.” Blood pooled beneath her fragile body. I gathered her into my arms, snatched up her rabbit, and glared over her shoulder at Ryder. “Goddamn it, she’s just a little girl.”
He had the decency to look horrified before his training kicked in. “She’s dangerous.” He jerked a thumb at the pile of flesh and blood that had once been a Prince of Hell. “You wanna end up like Legolas over there?”
Dawn buried her head against my neck. This wasn’t the time to rage at Ryder, but I’d be having a few sharp words with him once we were safe. “We have to get out of here.” She’d killed a prince. Holy hell, killing a prince would surely trigger alarm bells in the netherworld. Plus, every demon in the local area would have sensed her power-drain.
Ryder offered me a hand. I ignored it and pulled Dawn close while staggering to my feet. “Let’s get her to the car. I need to see how bad the wound is.”
“I just grazed her,” he grumbled. “I should have killed her.”
I glared at him as we made a dash for the doors. “What the hell has gotten into you?”
“She was gonna kill you, Muse.”
I uttered a string of colorful curses and shoved through the door of the club into a wall of bright light. The full weight of half a dozen spotlights blinded me. My demon reared up, poised for a fight. She tried to wench my control away. I staggered back with a snarl, fighting instincts and alarm.
“RELEASE THE HALF BLOOD.” A voice boomed somewhere behind the barricade of blinding light. Enforcers. A rich melodic growl bubbled up from my demon. I swung an accusing glare at Ryder. He’d set me up.
Hands raised, gun still palmed, he backed up. The bastard was retreating to join his ranks. “It’s for the best.”
Like hell it was. I glared hard into the lights and made out a handful of cars, maybe a dozen Enforcers, all armed, all ready to shoot me down if I made one wrong move.
“Muse...” Dawn mumbled.
“It’s okay. It’s going to be okay.” And it would be okay. Because they weren’t having her. “I want you pretend you’re somewhere safe. Somewhere warm. Think of the beach.”
“I’ve never been to a beach.”
My heart broke for her, and I nearly dropped the reins of my demon right then. “When we get out of this, I promise to take you.” I set her gently on the road outside The Voodoo Lounge and straightened to face my enemies.
“STEP AWAY FROM THE HALF BLOOD.”
Screw you.
I stepped around Dawn’s vulnerable form and lifted my hands. My eyes had adjusted to the stark whiteness. I could see the Enforcers much clearer now. Some, I knew. Adam wasn’t there. Ryder stood off to the left on the fringes of the cadre. His steely eyes watched me while the others appeared more interested in Dawn. Ryder knew where the real threat lay. He stilled, lifted his chain, and shouted an order.
In a second’s thought, my demon slammed into me. I planted both feet and closed my eyes. The veil opened with a precise mental swipe, and freedom whispered in my ear. Yes, this was right. My fire danced with me, roaring loud, swallowing the sounds of gunfire. Bullets slapped against my molten skin. I tasted melted metal in the blaze. Doubt didn’t exist. Fear had fled. When Damien’s poison seeped out of its hiding place and flushed through my veins, it didn’t matter. They would not have Dawn.
The veil pulsed, and with it, pleasure strummed through my quivering demon muscles. I had more, so much more to give. Levi’s words, Mother of Destruction—words I’d almost missed—briefly flitted through the inferno of my mind before skipping out of reach. My demon cared nothing for those words. Or those people. Or Ryder. But she recognized the half blood cowering on the floor behind us. She recognized power, and Dawn’s little human body threw off enough power to render my demon feral.
I worked fire and flame like a conductor directs an orchestra. A flick of a wrist, a glance, a twitch. It was easy, quick, and wondrous. Wildfire ran free. When the gas tanks on the cars blew, shrapnel pummeled my molten skin. I soaked up the pain, twisting it into pleasure. Screams, sirens, gunshots, alarms: they meant no more to me than birdsong at the break of dawn. I expected the madness, when it came, to be a violent thing. I’d thought Damien’s embrace would shred my thoughts and flay my soul, but the truth couldn’t be further from my fears. The insanity, the chaos, was instead peaceful. All I had to do, was let go. I wondered why I’d ever fought it.
Akil’s words drifted through the placid lake of my thoughts, ‘If you ceased battling your other half, and embraced the truth of what you are, you’d have your answer.’
It became clear as I stood in front of Dawn and flushed flames through the street, washing them clean of Enforcers, that freedom was within my grasp. Once free, nobody could stop me. Not the Institute. Not Akil. I was the mother of fire, and fire destroys. I was destruction.
Chapter Twenty Four
Chewing on my thumbnail, I paced the tiny front room in Jerry’s modest apartment. Dawn slept on a battered old couch, a blanket pulled up under her chin, bunny tucked under an arm. We’d fled the scene, and I’d called Jerry from a payphone only once I was sure the Enforcers hadn’t sent back up after us. He hadn’t asked questions, but he didn’t need to. The street we’d left behind was ablaze. Fire crews had descended on The Voodoo Lounge. I’d walked away from a hellish nightmare of my own creating. There were bodies back there. I knew it. There had to be. When I’d summoned the fire, I’d let it gorge itself. To make matters worse, Damien’s poison had crawled into my skin and stoked my lust for chaos.
I’d he
ard their screams...
What if Ryder had been one of them?
“You’re going to wear a hole in my carpet.”
Jerry’s deeply delicious voice coaxed my thoughts back into the room. I looked down. There wasn’t any carpet, just well worn floorboards. Lifting my head, I fixed a neutral mask on my face and gave Jerry the picture of restrained stoicism. His backlit, muscular frame filled his kitchen doorway.
“Coffee?” He grumbled.
I nodded, not trusting my voice. I hadn’t spoken to him, not since the call. I was afraid of what I might say. My gaze fell to Dawn. I’d been protecting her. And that would have been just fine, but it wasn’t entirely true. Not all my motives had been as honorable. The demon shifted inside me, resettling, her urges sated. I’d let go. And I’d liked it.
Watching Dawn’s chest rise and fall, a resolute calm settled over me. I couldn’t go back to the Institute. I’d burned that proverbial bridge. I didn’t want to anyway. Not like this, so close to madness. I would take Dawn, and we’d go away, just the two of us. But I didn’t want to leave the life I’d made for myself. I liked my home. I enjoyed chatting with Rosa about her time in England. Lacy was like a breath of fresh air in my otherwise stale existence. After Stefan had blown my workshop to smithereens, I never thought I’d find somewhere to call home again, but Southie was as close as I was going to get. To keep Dawn safe, I’d have to walk away. To keep my neighbors and friends safe, I couldn’t go back. What would Stefan do in my shoes? As soon as I wondered as much, I smiled. He’d already done it. He’d walked away to keep those he loved safe.
I moved to the kitchen doorway and leaned against the frame. Jerry’s mountainous bulk filled the tiny galley-style room. I watched him fix two coffees, tracing my gaze over the swirl of tattoos marking his scalp. “You always been a demon doctor, Jerry?”
“Nah. I was a warrior in another life.” His deep voice filled the kitchen just as well as his muscle-bound body. Warrior was an obscure word. I was about to ask him what he meant when he planted a steaming hot cup of coffee in my hand. “Get that in you.”
I had to crane my neck to meet his eyes. For a warrior, he had curiously beautiful eyes. Beguiling. He regarded me with detached indifference. “Have you ever killed anyone?” I asked. It’s not the sort of question you can ask in passing. How was your day? Have you killed anyone lately? But Jerry was different. I might not have known him well, but I recognized strength when I saw it and not just physical strength either. He’d helped me before. He knew about half bloods. He’d seen a lot of things, knew a great deal about demons. There was more to him than a backstreet vet.
That fact was made all the more clear when he didn’t react at all to my question. The mask of tattoos didn’t move. He raised his mug, took a sip, glanced through the doorway behind me, and then leaned his bulk back against the countertop. “Well, I guess you aren’t as dead as the Institute made out, huh?”
“Looks that way.” I tasted the coffee. Strong. Black. It would deliver the kick of caffeine I’d surely need to keep marching forward. I’d have welcomed a shot of whiskey with it.
Jerry’s gaze roamed over me, assessing my new post-death transformation, complete with blond hair and short pink skirt. “Not sure about the pink and black...”
I arched an eyebrow. “Says the man wearing a mesh tank-top over gray sweatpants.”
He snorted a laugh but quickly sobered. “That lil’ girl asleep on my couch is Carol-Anne’s half blood, Muse. How’d you get her, and what happened at the Lounge just now?”
I flinched, not entirely surprised that Jerry knew who Dawn was. Clamping both hands around my mug, I brought it to my lips. Hot, aromatic steam wafted over my face. “I think I killed them,” I mumbled. I’d said the words. They were out there, as though speaking them made the truth all the more real. I’d expected to be afraid of the facts, but a cold weight of acceptance settled in my gut. Was this what Stefan meant when he said he didn’t care? A part of me cared. That part cared so much that I was afraid to acknowledge it for fear I might break down and let the demon in. I could crawl into the corners of my mind and hide while she took control. She wanted to. She hungered. It would be easier that way. I hide, and she wins.
Jerry slowly blinked. Even his eyelids were marked. “You’ve changed since you asked for help to control your demon months ago. You’re not that same woman. I see that. There’s steel in you now. If you killed, that’s your burden. It’s how you deal with it that will define you.” His steady tone and even stare could only come from experience.
I nodded. “I think Levi might be dead.”
His eyes narrowed to slits.
“Yeah.” Keeping my gaze trained on him, I gulped coffee, and welcomed the heat searing my tongue. “I don’t suppose that’s going to go unnoticed for long.”
He rubbed the palm of his hand over his shaved head. “You killed a Prince of Hell? A creature that can’t be killed? An immortal chaos demon?”
My eyelids fluttered as I looked down. The lie felt right. Dawn didn’t need the fallout from that coming down on her. If she had any hope of escaping all this crap, she’d need to stay off the demons’ radar. “Yeah. He had it coming. Nobody puts half bloods in cages. Not anymore.”
Jerry shifted, planted his coffee on the counter, and crossed his thick arms over his chest. “Shit. You really are something.” A smirk broke out across his lips, brightening his eyes and lessening the effects of those intimidating tats. “You know what they’ve started calling you across the veil?”
Whore. Abomination. Filth. I’d heard it all. “I can guess.”
“The Mother of Destruction.”
Jerry’s words slammed into me. I attempted to hide my reaction by freezing my expression somewhere between mild curiosity and indifference. The result probably looked as though I was having a stroke. Levi had called me the same. When demons start calling you the Mother of Destruction, shit gets real. Titles have power in the netherworld. They’re not just words. They’re a purpose.
I blinked and laughed. “That’s insane.”
“Yeah well, you’re dead, so I guess you got a posthumous rep or something. Although, from what I hear, didn’t you nuke a few hundred demons not so long ago?”
I recalled that event well. The ash-strewn images, boiling flames, and acrid smells stalked my dreams. I’d leveled a few netherworld buildings and turned on the Prince of Greed too. “Yeah.” It wasn’t something my human half was proud of. My demon, on the other hand...
“Alright. So let me get this straight.” He lifted his hand and started checking off my sins on his fingers. “You ruined the Prince of Greed, one of the First chaos demons... You killed the Price of Envy, also immortal, although not-so-much. You nuked a flock of demons. Killed your owner. Wiped out a cadre of Enforcers?” He raised his eyebrows. “For such a little thing, you’ve got some serious issues.”
I choked on a splinter of bitter laughter. It was so ludicrous that the only sane thing I could do was laugh. “You offering to be my therapist?”
“I would if I wasn’t scared of you.” He flashed me pearly white teeth.
A rich bubble of laughter burst from me. There I was, a tiny half-blood thing dressed in pink and black, standing in front of the formidable Jerry, and he’s telling me he’s afraid of me? I laughed so hard I had to put my coffee down. The demons believed me some kind of harbinger of destruction? Hilarity flirted with insanity. Laughter wracked me so damn hard my sides hurt, and my eyes watered.
“Laugh it up, Muse.” Jerry spluttered between bursts of his own laughter. “’Cause once the princes realize you’re alive, they’re gonna be coming for you.”
Chapter Twenty Five
The bus ride to Salem was a painfully slow experience. Dawn had receded into a quiet shell and refused to speak to me. I wasn’t entirely sure if the silent treatment was due to what she’d done or my own monumental fuck-up. As I watched the scenery outside the bus windows change from urban sprawl to leafy green t
rees, I was also acutely aware that my brother would soon realize Levi was dead. Would he suspect his supposedly deceased half-sister? He knew about Blackstone—where Dawn and I were headed. It wouldn’t take him long to find us. Once inside, we were safe. It was the only sanctuary left. I couldn’t risk exposing my neighbors to the likes of Val. I needed to get away, to regroup and collect my thoughts. Blackstone was my last chance to figure out my next move. The Institute would be looking for us. Jenna had likely told them about Akil’s house in the country. That meant I’d have to plan my next move quickly.
Security lighting puddled around Blackstone. Dawn and I had trudged up the driveway, wrung out, saying nothing. Her power coiled around her and throbbed like the dark thing clenching my heart. What a pair we made.
The night was quiet and calm. It soothed my wrung-out thoughts, but my demon stalked too close to the surface of my mind for comfort. The devil on my shoulder, she whispered, coerced, and tingled my human senses. I would need to shut her down if I wanted to pretend everything was fine and dandy. Another confrontation like the last could tip the scales of my control indefinitely.
I’d expected Blackstone to be empty, but as we rounded the bend in the driveway, I saw that someone was clearly home. A sleek, black and silver Lamborghini had gouged out four grooves in the loose gravel before being discarded outside the house. I glanced at the car as we passed. Low to the ground, shaped like an arrow, its sleek lines and undulating curves gave it the appearance of travelling a hundred miles an hour while parked.
Two steps past the Lambo, a wall of heat blasted across my skin. I jerked back, pink human flesh firing off pain receptors in my brain. A rich curse followed. If I taught her nothing else, Dawn would have a colorful new vocabulary. Between us and the house, a wall of almost tangible heat blocked our path. I could call my demon, but I really didn’t want to risk having her back in my skin so soon.
Darkest Before Dawn: A Muse Urban Fantasy (The Veil Series Book 3) Page 18
