“How did everything turn upside down and then inside out so quickly?” I didn’t expect an answer from Evan, I was just thinking out loud.
“I don’t know, Jess. I guess a lot of it is my fault. I…” He stopped for a minute, trying to collect himself or figure out what he was trying to say. I didn’t know, then he started again. “I went through this once before, and it made me crazy. I forget sometimes that you are the present, and not my past. It’s been difficult on all of us, but I’ve made it worse for you than it needed to be. I apologize.”
I still didn’t say anything until after Ashley came back with the drinks. When she walked in the room and saw me leaning on Evan she looked disappointed. It was just a second, a brief glimpse, something Evan, himself, probably wouldn’t have noticed. Ashley and I were close though, and I knew that face, and I would have to talk to her about it later. I took one of the drinks from her and sniffed. It was a rum and coke.
“Bless you my child, for you are a saint!” I said to her, and then tipped back the cup and took a couple deep swigs. That was about the time I felt my phone buzzing. I put my drink down, and grabbed it out of my back pocket to take a look. It was definitely an incoming text.
Just wanted to check on you, and make sure you got to school all right this morning. It was from Mikael.
I didn’t even think before my fingers flew over the keys. I texted right back. Got there ok, but had to leave. The witch found me, and delivered a message.
WHAT? Where are you?
I’m fine. Was with Ashley. Asi brought us back to De’ Lune’s. We’re there now.
Good, stay there where someone is keeping an eye on you.
Ok.
Jess, she didn’t do anything to you, did she?
No. She just warned me that I needed to make a choice of mate sooner rather than later. I’ll tell you about it when I see you.
I’m on my way.
That’s probably not a good idea, and you know why.
I don’t really care about his feelings, when you have a witch trailing you.
“Jess? What’s going on?” It was Evan, and he didn’t look happy. He nodded at the phone in my hands that I had been furiously texting on.
“Nothing.” I said, and then I texted back to Mikael. You may not care about his feelings, but I do. And I don’t want any more fighting right now. Please!
Fine, but you go nowhere alone. Promise me.
I promise.
“Unbelievable! You’re texting him, aren’t you?” Evan’s tone got my attention quickly. It was all accusation, and I felt myself getting pissed all over again.
“What?” My fury was stewing as I snapped the one word, and just like that, his switch flipped, and he was in pissy-jealous mode again.
“You’re sitting here, practically in my lap, and you’re texting Mikael.” He hissed out, and then looked at me as if I had grown two, very hideous, heads. “I can’t believe you.”
“Excuse me?” I jumped up off the couch, and looked down on him now. “First of all, I wasn’t in your lap. For the five minutes you decided not to be a douchebag, I let you hold me. I won’t bother making that mistake again.” He flinched, now that hurt feelings were boring in through the flash of anger he had. “Second, Mikael was with me when I first saw the witch yesterday, so I thought he should know when he just checked in on me.”
“What do you mean when you saw her yesterday?”
“While we were out, she was there, I felt her presence, but she didn’t approach. She waved at me and faded off into the woods. We left after that.”
“You need to tell me exactly what happened yesterday. Right now, Jess!”
“Actually, I really don’t. That’s the only thing you need to know about yesterday. I saw the witch. She left, and then today she showed up at school.”
“Damn it, Jess! Stop playing games. What the hell were you and my brother doing in the woods?”
That was it. I lost it. “You know what, Evan, screw you!” He was so taken aback he flinched as if I had hit him. “That’s right! Screw you, because you know what? It’s not even about you. It’s not even about you being worried about the witch. You want to know if your brother and I were running together, letting our wolves bond, or whatever. Well, it’s none of your business. And if you keep it up, soon nothing about me will be your business. I hope you’re understanding what I am putting out there, because I’ve had it with your bullshit.”
Ashley and Asi had not left the room this time, but they did keep themselves out of the way as I let lose my temper tantrum. Asi tried to pretend he wasn’t paying attention, but Ashley was unabashedly watching the drama unfold. She mouthed, “you okay?”
“No, I want to go home. Right now. Can you take me to my Jeep?”
Ashley agreed immediately, but both Asi and Evan said, “NO,” at the same time. I looked back and forth between them, and then at Ashley, whose face was reddening. She clearly couldn’t go against her mate’s wishes on this, because it was his job to do what Evan asked, and besides, she didn’t have a car of her own here either.
“Fine.” I picked up my phone, and dialed a number, when it was answered I asked a simple question. “Can you come get me, please?” My voice broke on the please. I was holding on to my dignity by a string, but that little string was beyond frayed and ready to break. Hell, I would damn the wind if it attempted to blow right now, because pieces of me would scatter off and be lost.
About fifteen, very uncomfortable, minutes later there was a knock on the back door of the club. I went to the door, but Asi beat me there. He opened it, looked out, and turned to me. “Your ride is here.” I nodded, grabbed my bag, and headed the rest of the way to the door.
Evan caught hold of my arm before I could get two steps. “Don’t do this, Jess. Don’t leave like this.”
“I wouldn’t have. I was happy to sit like we were earlier, you know when you apologized for being a complete dick. What I’m not going to do is have this continue in a cycle. Not ten minutes after your apologies, you were losing your temper with me again. You need to stop looking at me as the bad guy here, and go look long and hard in the mirror. Seriously, don’t even bother talking to me again until you do.”
“Jess…” he all but whispered my name, but it was thick with pain, longing, and regret. I could hear it all there, and I couldn’t turn back to him. What we had now was toxic, and I couldn’t handle any more of it.
I just shook my head, and walked to the door. Asi was wise enough to close it behind me when I left, and I was pretty sure he probably stood guard there for a while too. He didn’t want Evan to see that it was Mikael who had come to my rescue. He would know, of course. But at least he could live with a little bit of denial for a while.
Mikael was straddling his bike, and as I got closer, I realized that my helmet was in the backseat of my Jeep still. “I don’t have my helmet. The Jeep is still on campus.”
He took his helmet off, and handed it over to me. “You wear it until we get to your Jeep. I’ll check your car out, and follow you home. That way you won’t be stuck again, okay?”
“Thank you,” I took the helmet, and put it on. His was one of the full-face helmets, so it hid the tears that started to fall down my face. It also wrapped me in his scent, which I was starting to associate with being calming and having choices that were actually mine. This is what I would have wanted Evan to do. I climbed on the back of the bike with Mikael, and we took off for the college campus. I held on tighter to Mikael than I probably needed to, but he didn’t seem to mind. When we pulled up next to my Jeep, he grabbed hold of my hands with his, and held me there for a minute. Then, he let me go.
“I’m sorry things are still so out of control for you, Jess.” He took the helmet I handed back to him. Then he walked over to my Jeep and gave it a good once over before I got in it. When I was sitting in the driver’s seat, he leaned in the window to talk to me. “I’ll follow you back, and make sure you get in the house with your parents befo
re I take off, okay?” When I just nodded at him, he added, “I just want to make sure you’re safe with someone who can protect you.”
“Thank you.” I looked up at him then, his vibrant green eyes were full of concern, and I felt something pulling at my heart as he stood there, just waiting on me. “Not just for the ride, and seeing me home safe, but for treating me like…” I didn’t know how to say what I wanted. “Well, for not treating me like shit, I guess. For not making everything out to be my fault.”
“None of this is your fault, Jess.” When I looked down at my hands that I was wringing in my lap, he reached in and tipped my chin back up. “You have to understand that. This is not your fault. Evan’s issues, they aren’t your fault. They’re his.”
“Yeah, I know. It just feels… well thank you for not being like that.”
“Start your Jeep. Let’s get you home. I think you could use a hot chocolate, and maybe for your mom to just put her arms around you, and give you a hug.”
“Seriously? You’re sending me home to my mommy?”
“Hey, don’t knock it. I think mom hugs are medicine you never grow too old for. Enjoy it while you have it.” He got ready to walk away, and then turned back around, “did you tell your parents about the witch, yet?”
“No. I didn’t really get a chance to.”
“Okay. Let’s make sure they know before I leave then.”
“Okay.”
Once we got back to the pack lands, and to my house, I parked the Jeep, and waited for Mikael to come walk me in the house. He was nice enough to make sure I had an escape hatch from his brother’s bullshit, and to see me safely home. The least I could do was humor him in making sure my parents knew about the latest possible risk.
“Mom, dad?” I yelled when we came through the front door.
“In the kitchen, Jess,” my mom called out.
I reached back and grabbed Mikael’s hand. The gesture surprised him, but he went right along with it, as if it were a normal thing for us. He closed the door behind us, and locked it, then we headed into the kitchen. My mom was working on a stew for dinner tonight, and the smell wafting out to us was mouth-wateringly good. “Oh God, your stew! It smells delicious already!” I dropped Mikael’s hand to go over and take the lid off the pot and sniff. Actually, I was in the process of trying to taste test it, but the minute I attempted to pick up the spoon my mom was there smacking my hand.
“Not until it’s ready, Jess. You know my rules.” She looked over at the man standing behind me. “Mikael,” she acknowledged. “Will you be staying for dinner?”
“No ma’am. Jessica has something to talk to you and Jameson about, and I wanted to make sure you both understood what happened before I left.”
“That doesn’t sound good,” my mom said as she wiped her hands off of on the towel she picked up.
“No, it doesn’t.” My dad had come in behind us. “Let’s sit down, and clear the air, then.”
We all sat down together, and I told them what happened when Ashley and I got to school. I still left out the part about the growing power, and about Ashley knowing who I should be with, but I told them the rest about me having to choose a mate soon, and how one would destroy me, but the other would help me. My parents, of course, looked at Mikael as if he were the destructive force. I hadn’t really been filling them in on how horribly Evan was treating me, or for that matter how well Mikael had been. He noticed my parents’ looks, and behaved as if it never happened.
“Listen, the only reason I stuck around is to let you know, this is serious. When the witches get involved, big things start happening. This particular witch is the same one that dissolved my parents’ binding.” He cleared his throat when my mom gave him a pitying look. “I’ve never known her to purposely hurt a wolf, without being asked to, but you never know. We need to make sure Jess is being looked after, and at the same time, not smothered. She’s an adult, and I think she’s just about sick to death of other people telling her what to do and when.” He looked at me and offered a week smile again. I was fighting back tears, because it was like he spoke from my own heart. I had been feeling caged lately. “Rest assured when she’s with either myself or my brother, she will be well looked after. I do believe Asi is going to start looking after the girls when they’re in school as well. I know you’ll do your best here too.”
“Of course, we will.” My father said, and for once he didn’t have attitude about it. I’m not sure what changed in the time Mikael had been talking, but my dad was looking at him a little differently. When Mikael got up to leave my father offered to walk him to the door, and I figured that was one scene I was going to stay out of.
“Good luck,” I mouthed to Mikael when he looked back over his shoulder to wave goodbye. He winked at me, and then he was gone.
My mom sighed to get my attention back on her. “What on Earth are you going to do?” She laughed as she tossed her towel down on the table. She had been twisting it in knots throughout the entire conversation with Mikael. “I think I may have judged that one too quickly.” She smiled at me, and grabbed my hands. “Time to tell me everything that’s been going on, because I know you were leaving things out about the witch. More importantly, you’ve definitely been leaving things out about Evan and Mikael.”
“Yeah, I have. Can I get some hot chocolate, first?” I thought back to the suggestion Mikael made earlier, to get hot chocolate and a big hug from my mom. That man was wise beyond reason, because suddenly, that was exactly what I needed.
“I’ll get it. You sit, and start talking.”
SPA DAY
When I woke up in the morning it was to the realization that I didn’t have any plans for the rest of the day. The thought of a stress-free day to myself made me extremely happy. I lie there for a while thinking about the talk I had with my mom the night before. She made me hot chocolate, she listened, and then I got lots of mom hugs with promises that things would work themselves out. I was beginning to think Mikael was psychic, because he had called it. Just hanging out with my mom was the perfect thing to calm my nerves, and settle me down. For a change, I managed to sleep through the night without the usual nightmares plaguing my dreams.
I rolled out of bed, and looked at my alarm clock. It was 9:30 am. Compared to normal, that was sleeping in. I jumped up, tossed my night clothes off, and threw my robe on. The coffee brewing downstairs in the kitchen called to me, and my mom was there handing me a cup as I walked in.
“Thanks.” I took the cup, leaned in, and gave her a kiss. “And thanks for listening last night. I felt so much better afterwards that I actually slept for once.”
“You’re welcome. You know you can talk to me any time about anything, Jess.”
“I know.”
“Jess, why haven’t you at least been talking to Ashley?”
“I don’t know. I have, and then again so many things happened all clumped up together, that I haven’t had a minute alone with her. Plus, you know, she has Asi now, and I don’t want to have my complaints getting back to Evan.”
“Maybe you should let them get back to him.”
“I suppose, but I don’t want to talk about that right now. Today is for me. I’m going for a run after I suck this wake-up juice down, and I’m thinking that the hot springs in the caves sound like the perfect way to spend my morning.”
“Do you think it’s wise to be so far out, on your own, with everything going on?”
“Mom, I get a weird and tingly forewarning when the witch comes around. Besides, I am not going to live in fear for the rest of my life. I refuse to let what Marcus did to me, what Antoine is doing, or what a witch may decide to do keep me from living and being happy. If I do, then what’s the point in any of it?”
“You are going to make a wonderful ruler one day!” She kissed the top of my head. “Be safe, and get gone before your dad gets back. He’s going to be upset enough that I let you go.” She winked at me, and went back to her bedroom.
I knocked b
ack the rest of my coffee, rinsed the cup out, and was out the door in under two minutes. Once I hit the porch, I shed my robe, felt the familiar warmth tingle through my body as it prepared for the shift, and then like a weight lifted off my soul, I was free to run. My four legs carried me into the forest by the house, and I ran with wild abandon, something I hadn’t done in a very long time. The wind ran its chilly fingers through my fur as I picked up speed, while I enjoyed the stretch of my muscles. I wasn’t completely oblivious as I ran. My senses were at their peak, heightened by the form I was in. The underbrush, with its morning dampened earth was the pervading scent, along with pine, and a hint of deer. I almost lost track of what I was doing then, when my wolf tried to veer off course to go hunt. I refused though, hunting could come later. The hot springs were still calling to my human body, and I wasn’t going to miss out on the relaxation and self-indulgence today.
When I finally broke free of the forest and wandered up close to the mouth of the cave, I threw my senses out one more time to be sure the closest caves were empty, and that no one was around in the surrounding parts of the forest either. When I was sure the coast was clear, I shifted back into my human form, and walked into the cave closest to me. My favorite set of hot springs and a thermal pool were just inside the opening of this particular spot. I walked into the geo-thermal pool from the shallow end that was only about ankle deep. It had a shelf system to it that made perfect steps so that you could gradually walk into the water. By the time I was near the bottom the water was up to my abdomen, and I bent my knees and sunk down from there. I leaned back, letting my hair flow free into the water, feeling the heat relax my muscles further. I always forgot to bring some candles or something with me when I came out here. Mostly, because I ran it in wolf form, which made carrying things a hassle, and impossible when you were solo. Only the barest of light found its way into the pool from the mouth of the cave, so it was dark in here. The dark, combined with the warmth of the water wrapping around me was going to be a dangerous combination. I swam over to the edge of the pool and climbed up on the shelf for leverage, and to rest my head there. Since my biggest worry today was going to be falling asleep and drowning myself, I figured this would be a safe position. I was still shoulder deep in the water, as I lie back and closed my eyes to relax.
Falling into the White (The Ancients Series) Page 7
