by Unknown
“No,” I pulled away. “You must choose one or the other, as I have done.”
“Ata,” he sighed. “I've already chosen you.”
“Only because she wouldn't accept you,” I narrowed my eyes on him when he blanched. “It's true, isn't it? She wouldn't choose you. Who did you take her away from? What evil have you and Naye done in order to bring me back?”
“We did what we had to do,” he stood and gripped my waist tight before pulling me against him. “And I'd do it again. I'd choose you over and over because I've never known love like I have with you. You are my Moon now.”
“I...” I had a vision of a wolf, head lifted to the moon, howling a lonely cry. “Trevor,” I whispered and Toby jerked in shock.
“What did you say?” He asked with a deceptively quiet tone.
“I don't know,” I blinked and refocused on him.
“You're mine now, Ata,” he turned and lifted me onto the bed, quickly following after me. His body pinned mine to the mattress. “There will be no others. I won't let you go and I won't share you.”
He ran a hand over the core of me and I went wet from his magic. A finger trailed over my skin and everywhere it ventured, the water in my flesh responded to his call. The moon may hold sway over the water but my body was mostly made of water and he was master of it.
I moaned as tingles spread through me, ecstasy rising suddenly like the tide. I was lifted up on it, screaming, and he'd barely touched me. When I fell back to earth, shaking and gasping, he was above me. His eyes were full of satisfaction as he angled between my thighs and slid within.
“There is only you and I,” he whispered against my throat as the garden went dark. “You're my Moon and I am your Darkness.”
“I do not fear the dark,” I whispered but I wasn't sure who I was trying to convince. My body seemed to quake in response to the words, knowing something I didn't.
“I want more than that,” he lifted his face to mine as he pushed deeper inside me. “Tell me you love me.”
“I love you,” I said automatically.
“Say my name, Ata,” he persisted. “Speak the words into the darkness and give them life.”
“I love you, Tobadzistsini.”
“I love you too, Vervain,” his voice was barely a whisper but I heard it clearly and pain flashed through my chest. I wanted to scream a denial but my body was already cresting that wave of desire and instead, I screamed with ecstasy.
Chapter Forty-One
My dreams that night were strange. The man with black wings was back and he'd brought others with him. A wild looking man with eyes like warm honey, a man with hair even longer than mine and eyes bluer than Tobadzistsini's, and a sweet faced angel with eyes like diamonds. Each pair of eyes were different but they stared at me the same.
“What do you want?” I edged away from the men, afraid of their intense stairs.
“We want you to come home, Vervain,” the diamond-eyed one said.
That name again. The one on Toby's lips. How many men loved her? Why couldn't I have just one to myself? I hated her then, that other part of me. I hated that she was so loved and that I wasn't. It made me hate them too.
“My name is Atahensic of the Iroquois,” I lifted my head proudly. “Goddess of the Moon. I have risen again and your Vervain is gone, lost in my shadow.”
The men gaped at me, two of them started to growl. The one with honey eyes stepped forward but the misty-eyed angel stopped him with a hand on his arm.
“Vervain!” the honey eyed one snarled. “I know you're in there. Don't let this bitch win. I need you. Look at me! I'm dying without you. I need to touch my soul.”
“Your soul?” I frowned as the angel let go of him.
“Touch her,” the angel said to the wild man. “This image is a direct connection to her soul, and therefore to yours.”
The wild looking one glanced sharply at the angel and then smiled. He leapt forward and grabbed me around the waist, casting us both down onto the soft grass. I gasped as he sighed, sinking his face into my neck. He seemed to brighten and when he lifted his face, I saw the shadows beneath his eyes lightening and his cheeks filling in until he looked vibrantly healthy.
“Vervain,” he sighed. “We can't reach you. You have to fight this. I'm sorry, Minn Elska, so sorry I can't help you fight. This battle is yours alone. Be strong for all of us and push this intruder from your mind. I know you can do it.”
“Get off me,” I growled and the man was flung backwards as if he'd been thrown by a giant hand. I inhaled sharply and stood, watching him pick himself up with shock. Did I do that?
“Your name is Vervain Lavine,” the second angel strode forward, the one with diamond eyes like twin stars. “You're the Godhunter. Beloved of a Froekn Prince, a werelion Ganza, the Angel of Death, a Fey Dragon King, and the ruler of Asgard. You are Tima to the Intare and the Queen of the House of Fire. Inside of you lies the Trinity Star and you are more powerful than this.”
“Odin is on the verge of insanity,” the wild man with honey eyes growled. “He used his new ability to drain Tawiskaron's magic and now that magic is too much for him. We need you to come home and help us drain it away.”
“Odin?” I snarled. “He's the one who killed my son and now you ask me to help him? I hope the madness consumes him! I hope he dies screaming!”
“Vervain,” the diamond-eyed angel gasped. “You love Odin. You brought him back from the Void.”
“Then he can return there and take my son's magic back to him.”
“Tawiskaron is not your son,” the angel sighed. “You've been brainwashed somehow. This isn't you. Please, Vervain, fight this.”
“Nayenezgani and Tobadzistsini have started a var vith ze US Government zat zey von't be able to vin,” the man with very long hair added in a strange accent. “You vill fail your people if you stay vith zem. If you really are Atahensic, you must see zat it vould be better for you to release Vervain. Zat is ze only vay you vill help your followers. Please give her back to us.”
“I'm not going anywhere,” I snarled. “You will never have your woman back. Forget her. I'm done living my life for others, this time I'll live for myself. If Tobadzistsini walks a path, I'll follow him, no matter if it leads our people to ruin. I'll still be happy by his side.”
“Tobadzistsini? Vhat is he to you?” The long haired one cocked his head at me and I suddenly remembered where I'd seen him before. He'd been the one who I'd seen a vision of, in place of Toby. He'd looked at me with so much love but then it wasn't really me he'd been looking at.
“He's the Dark to my Moon,” I smiled grimly. “My lover and the other half of my magic.”
Those deep blue eyes closed in pain as the others gave varying degrees of denials. Curses, growls, violent declarations of vengeance. Oh no, that didn't make them happy at all. I lifted a brow and smirked at them.
“Angry that she could be happy with just one man?” I rubbed salt in their wound. “Or angry that he isn't one of you?”
“She isn't happy, you cold, dead, bitch!” The wild man growled, pointing an accusing finger at me. “You are. You've given her body to a man she doesn't love. Not your body, hers! You're a thief and a rapist. You've stolen our love from us and now you stand there looking smug about it. You could never understand what we share with her. You're nothing but cold, unfeeling moonlight given form. A empty entity that needed our Vervain to make her real, to make her feel!”
“Call me what you will but I'm in control now. Say goodbye to your lover and move on,” I felt the anger rising up in me, a violent eruption like molten lava. Fire. It spread through me and dropped me to my knees. I screamed in agony as memories of these men rushed over me. Another me was rising and she was just as angry as I was. “Trevor!” I screamed and fought my way free of Ata's memories. I broke through the surface and gasped. “Kirill,” I fell back to the grass as the men lunged forward. “Azrael,” I named the diamond eyed angel and he smiled down on me, the strange writ
ing on his cheek glowing blue. “You found me.”
“Morpheus brought us into the Realm of Dreams,” Azrael waved a hand back to Morpheus and the dream god grinned.
“Hey, you,” I whispered.
“Hey back,” he grinned.
“Vervain, where are you, do you know?” Azrael asked quickly. “The rings you made us stopped working as soon as you were taken and even Mrs E can't find the twin's territory anymore. She's been blocked completely.”
“I...” I groaned as Atahensic tried to overpower me again. Her memories had become a living force, their own separate entity, and it had a strong will. It was like being possessed. I was there, I was her, but I had no control over myself. The memory of Atahensic made all the decisions.
“Fight her,” Kirill took my hand. “Tima, ve need you.”
“Toby vanquished my magic,” I gasped out. “I can't fight them.”
“But you don't need magic to fight Atahensic,” Trevor insisted. “You're stronger than her. She's just a ghost, not real.”
“If only that were true,” I knew I'd be strongest there, in the Realm of Dreams, where all I was were my thoughts, but as soon as I woke up, she'd be back, angrier than ever.
“Just tell us how to get to you,” Kirill offered.
“I don't know how,” I sighed. “It's not like I can draw you a map of the Aether and the only time I've left their territory was to go to the Navajo Nation.”
“Yes, we saw what happened there,” Azrael shook his head. “I was called in for some of the souls.”
“I'm so sorry,” I hung my head, “I wish I could have stopped them.”
“It's not your fault,” Kirill leaned his cheek against mine.
“Do you know when they might take you back to the Human Realm?” Az asked.
“I'm not sure,” I frowned. “I know they're trying to get a wall built around the perimeter of the reservation.”
“Ask them to show it to you,” Trevor urged. “We'll watch the borders for you and when you appear, we'll take you from them.”
“I'll try,” I agreed, “sometimes I can influence her with my emotions.”
“It's about as good a plan as any,” Azrael sighed. “Know that we'll be watching for you. As long as it takes, we'll wait for you to appear.”
“Wait, what did you say about Odin?” I suddenly remembered. “He's going insane?”
“Tawiskaron's magic is fighting with his for control,” Trevor nodded. “Teharon is trying to help him but he can only calm him for short periods. Teharon says that Tawiskaron's demon powers like Odin's war and death magics too much, they're enhancing each other to the detriment of all,” Trevor swallowed hard. “His eyes are slowly turning black.”
“I'll do what I can to get back to you but for now, keep him safe. I love you all,” I held out my arms and they tightened in around me. As the love rose inside me, so did the pain. Not my pain but hers, a blinding white light, blocking out my thoughts with her own. Taking me over again.
She screamed and woke us up.
I blinked away the tears coursing down my cheeks and focused on Toby's sleeping form beside me. His strong profile, his smooth chest, his thick arm around me. I sighed and laid my cheek to his heart again. The steady beat calmed me. Like tribal drums in the night, it spoke to my soul and reminded me of who I was. If only my soul could be more certain.
Chapter Forty-Two
“Ata,” Toby whispered as I woke up.
I looked up at him, he was holding me against his chest and I had to angle my head back to do it. Then I pulled away completely and sat up. His expression was too sad and serious. It made my heart start to pound wildly.
“What is it?” I asked as he sat up too.
“I'm so sorry for how I behaved last night,” he took my hands and rubbed my palms gently. “There's no excuse for being so rough.”
“Rough?” I let out a short bark of laughter and then clamped a hand to my mouth, shocked at my own response.
“You didn't think I was rough with you?” He frowned. “I practically forced myself on you.”
“Not hardly,” I shook my head. “Toby, you were aggressive, yes, but I know what rough is and you weren't that. You were angry, passionate, maybe a little forceful but I kind of liked it.”
“I didn't,” he let go of my hands and ran his fingers through his hair. “I don't want to be like that, like...”
“Naye?” I offered quietly.
“Yes,” he whispered. “I don't want to hurt you.”
“Toby, you forget that you're opposites,” I reclaimed his hand. “You could never be like Naye because your very magic compels you to be contrary. The mere fact that you're concerned about it shows that you will never become like him.”
“So I didn't scare you?” He started to relax.
“Only when you called me by her name,” I whispered.
He closed his eyes in regret and bowed his head over our joined hands. When he looked back up at me, his eyes were sad once more.
“Sometimes I think I'm as confused as you are,” he sighed. “I don't know who I've fallen in love with. I look at you and see her, hear her voice, yet it's your words that fall from her lips. At first those words were so different from what she would have said that it was easy to separate you from her but now it seems like you've slowly become more like her and there are moments when I forget that you're not her.”
“Moments like last night?” I wasn't sure if I was upset or scared or relieved.
“Yes,” he kissed my cheek. “Please try to understand how difficult this is for me. I love you both.”
“I guess I can live with that,” I bit at my lip and he smiled and hugged me.
“Thank you,” he whispered and then a sharp bark interrupted us. “I love you too, Doba,” he reached out to the dog who was sitting patiently at the foot of the bed and scratched her behind her ears. “Okay, we'd better get back to Naye before he loses his patience.”
“And his mind,” I muttered.
“What was that?” He looked back at me with a grin.
“Nothing,” I feigned innocence.
“Uh-huh,” he laughed and led us all back into the tunnel, where he traced us out to the lake shore. Then we held Doba between us and traced over to the mountain house.
“The walls are going up,” Naye said as we walked into the kitchen. “Everything is going as planned.”
“Should we go down and check the borders?” Toby asked as he went to put the kettle on the stove and start cooking breakfast.
“I think I'd like to go down and give our people some encouragement,” I said without thinking.
“Really?” Naye lifted his brows. “You didn't seem so pleased with the way things happened at the Council House.”
“What's done is done,” I waved it away. “I must accept it and move forward for the good of our people.”
“Wonderful,” Naye smiled broadly. “I think that would be good for them. They need to see their goddess as well as their gods.”
“Good,” I sat back happily, unsure why I was so satisfied with the result.
After breakfast, I changed into a beaded leather dress, Naye insisted that I wear something traditional. A goddess had to project a certain image and cotton wouldn't work for our purposes, even if it was the fabric of our lives. Wait, what? I blinked away the strange thought. Then I put on a pair of moccasins and frowned again when I realized I was wearing all white. It felt familiar, like I'd worn a dress just like it recently.
“Ata?” Toby stood in my doorway looking concerned. Doba was beside him, she went everywhere with him now. “Are you sure you want to go down there?”
“Do you think I should stay here?” I countered, slightly panicked at the thought.
“No, I think Naye's right,” he sighed. “I think it will do the people some good to see you. Tensions are high now that the US Government has gotten wind of the takeover. They've sent in military to man the roads leading into the Navajo Nation. They haven't a
ttacked yet, the barricades and weapons have held them off, but I think it's just a matter of time.”
“Then we need to bolster the spirits of our soldiers,” I nodded.
“Yes,” he agreed. “If we can.”
“I'm ready,” I stood up and we went out to meet Nayenezgani.
We traced over together, Doba too, coming out of the Aether onto an open patch of dusty land. We were in front of a makeshift wall constructed of rusted cars, pieces of fencing, lumber, trash, and whatever could be found to pile on top of it. It looked apocalyptic but it seemed to be doing the trick. There were men set at holes along the barricade, watching intently with weapons at the ready. Several of them left their posts when they saw us but were commanded back by others.
A group of men approached us and bowed their heads reverently. They started to speak but before they could manage more than a few words, a huge number of people appeared around us. Gods. I gasped as I recognized the men from my dream. How had they found me? Toby's arm went to my shoulder as he pulled me back but before he could trace us away, a large, dark-skinned man leapt toward us, transforming into a lion mid-air. He knocked into Tobadzistsini and I fell back, away from them.
I was up again immediately but Doba was faster than I. She launched herself at the lion, latching onto his shoulder tenaciously. The lion merely swatted her away and she fell, skidding to a stop in the dirt. I had a moment's concern for her but it was Toby I was really worried about.
“Toby!” I screamed as I leaped forward. Our combined magic rose inside of me like the night, reaching to him, touching him before I could. The lion lifted his head, mouth bloody from where it had torn into Toby's neck, and backed away. As I reached them, it whimpered, then turn and ran. I would have given chase but Toby called to me.
He had both of his hands clasped to his neck, blood pouring out from between his fingers. The wound was massive, nearly decapitating him. His body was struggling to heal itself and I watched in horror as the flesh slowly tried to knit together. I dropped to the ground beside him and put my hands over his. Doba came up behind me, whimpering, and part of me spared a thought of gratitude that she was okay. Then Toby's eyes softened as they focused on me and more blood poured through his fingers as he tried to speak.