Tales from the Dead Man Inn

by Daniel Schinhofen

  NPC’s Lives

  Tales from the

  Dead Man Inn

  Daniel Schinhofen

  Copyright © 2019 Daniel J. Schinhofen

  No parts of this book may be reproduced in any form by an electronic or mechanical means – except in the case of brief quotations embodied in articles or reviews – without the written permission from the publisher.

  The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarities to real persons, living or dead, are purely coincidental and not intended by the author.

  Copyright © 2019 Daniel J. Schinhofen

  All rights reserved.

  Table of Contents

  Into the Dead Lands

  Lilith’s History

  Bob’s Tale

  Stewart’s Upbringing

  Erin’s Story

  Deirdre’s Story

  Marian’s Story

  Demon Lord’s Armor

  Skippy’s Tale

  Bob’s Tale Part Two

  Magiblood

  Into the Dead Lands

  Stewart stretched, waking with a mighty yawn that popped his jaw. Rubbing the joint, he blinked his eyes open before crawling out of bed. They were at Alistern’s family inn, having come back to the city to resupply and train. They wanted to take a full week off before heading out for the Dead Lands, the deadliest place on the continent. They had celebrated their eightieth level last night in the tap room and had spent a good bit of gold buying drinks for the entire place. Alfonse Crowley, Alistern’s father, had even been in a celebratory mood.

  Finally prying himself out of bed, Stewart got dressed, wondering how much shit he was going to have to deal with today. Being a Half-blood Infernal in Stormguard meant he had to put up with being sneered at frequently. Twenty-six years of life in the city and he was still treated with distrust, despite being known by a good number of people.

  If not for Alistern and his family, the Dark Lord only knew what he would have done. Putting his armor and weapons on, he left everything but his coin behind. He headed downstairs and nodded to Cora behind the bar, slipping into the back and down the passage into the tunnels. Walking down the path he had walked so often for all of his training, he eventually came into the cavern where Necromancers and Summoners could learn their arts. It was the only place of its kind in the city, and despite being shunned by all but those two professions, it really helped the inn flourish.

  Alfonse was glaring at Alistern at the back desk, the training book open between them. “Ya can’t be doin’ this. Who will take over the place iffin ya die out there?” Alfonse demanded, his mouth puckered in anger.

  Shaking his head, Alistern pushed the book back toward his father after choosing his Ability. “I will be back. Ya worry too much, ol’ man. We have all died at least three times and we have always come back. The last death comin’ more often ta adventurers is a myth. Besides, Stew and the rest of the gang will be with me. We’ll be fine. Have a bit o’ faith that the Dark Lord will watch over us.”

  Alfonse shook his head, his grey beard shaking vigorously. “Ya be too flippant, lad. The Dead Lands are the worst place on the continent, and goin’ there is like askin’ for death to claim ya.”

  Stewart approached the desk on soft feet. “Alfonse, I promise I will watch out for him like always. Don’t fret. If worst comes to worst, I will push him to run while I buy time. It is the least I can do for you.”

  Alistern spun on his friend. “Don’t you dare! I would be pissed if you died and I lived, Stew. Da’ just be over cautious like always. I’ll see ya later.” He stalked off to the rune, vanishing as soon as he put both feet on it.

  “Watch out for him, Stewart,” Alfonse said softly, collapsing into the chair behind the desk. “He do nay understand how much worry he causes me. What would become of this place iffin me line does nay continue ownin’ it?”

  “I understand, and I will watch over him like normal. Let me grab my Ability. We both know that no one will stop him from going. I will need everything at my disposal to keep up with him.”

  Alfonse pushed the book to Stewart. “Aye, tha’ be the truth, lad. A more hard-headed, stubborn child I have never known. Takes after his ma’.”

  Laughing, Stewart chose the Ability he wanted. “I won’t tell her that. I want to keep my head attached.”

  Alfonse gave a small laugh, “Aye. Alright lad, off ya go. Will ya all be in town long?”

  “A week was the original plan, but with Alistern in a mood right now, who can tell? I’ll see you tonight in the tap room, I’m sure.” Stewart gave a small wave as he went to the rune, teleporting to the graveyard in front of the inn.

  Alistern was leaning against a nearby headstone. “What took ya so long?”

  “Your father, what else? He wanted to see if I could dissuade you as normal,” Stewart fell into step with Alistern so they could proceed into town. Stewart hunched slightly and pulled his hood up to cover his red skin, feeling self-conscious in public.

  “Bah, we will be fine, just like we have been for the last two years. So, did ya take care of Tabitha last night? Darkness knows she was beggin’ for it when we was huntin’ last,” Alistern chuckled as he nudged his friend.

  “Yeah, I gave her what she wanted to tide her over. It causes problems with Flora, though. It’s not like I fuck Tabitha… I just have to prove I’m in charge of her, but Flora still gets upset. I’ve tried to explain the complexities involved with keeping the minions happy, but all she sees is me spending time with another female. It doesn’t help when you and Lilith go on for hours in carnal depravity,” Stewart said blank-faced, looking at his friend.

  Chuckling, Alistern shrugged. “What can I say? Lilith is a right little bunny always ready for a tumble. I had no idea she was going to be so demandin’ when I got her. Still, we seem to connect better than any of the others I’ve slept with. So, about you and Flora… have ya finally gotten her to tumble?”

  Shaking his head sadly, Stewart sighed. “No. She says I will wait for her to be ready if I love her. It doesn’t help when she wants to cuddle when we are out hunting… talk about purple balls. I’ve tried to explain that to her, but she just tells me it will help me build my self-control. I swear, I’m going to do something I will regret next time.”

  Alistern laughed, “Aye, then she’ll use her vines to secure ya to the ground before she rips ya pride from ya body. Do nay fuck with a woman who can bind ya with plant life, be my advice. It still be fucked tha’ she does tha’ to ya.”

  Stewart sighed and shrugged. “Yeah. Are we meeting up with the others to buy new gear, or are we just meeting back at the bar at the end of the week?”

  “Meetin’ back up. Grimgar went back to Rockstrong last night, Almira went to Brightgrove this mornin’, and Flora is back in Wildwood. They all wanted to see family before we head out again.”

  “Fair enough. I wonder what that is like,” Stewart said, only a trace of the old pain he felt at being abandoned as a child coloring his voice.

  “Bah, ya see me all the time. Me and mine be ya family. It nay be blood tha’ is family, it be the ones tha’ stand by ya regardless of the trials.” Alistern said, slapping his friend on the back. “Now, let’s get some new leathers and staves today so we can spend the rest of the week enjoyin’ life.”

  Shaking off the gloom, Stewart nodded. “Thanks, brother.”

  ~*~*~

  The week flew by with Stewart and Alistern spending time away from the inn, hoping to stop Alfonse making any attempts to fight Alistern’s decision. The morning of their departure came, and when Stewart made it downstairs, he saw the others all waiting for him. “Sorry,” he muttered to the smirks on his friends’ faces
. “I’m ready to go when you are.”

  Alistern thrust a chunk of bread at him. “Eat that on the way to the Portal Guild so we do nay have to listen to ya belly later.”

  Grimgar chuckled. “Always the last one ready to go, Stew. One day, ye are goin’ to be late to ye own funeral.”

  “You are one to talk?” Almira chuckled. “I had to drag you out of your bed this morning.”

  Blushing slightly, Grimgar coughed, “Well, I was up late the night before helpin’ the clan with the shop.”

  “Likely story. By shop, do you mean the brothel down the street from the smithy?” Almira smirked at him. “You had powder from their makeup still on your chest when I rousted you.”

  Grimgar looked to Stewart, his face red. Stewart sighed silently before helping out his beleaguered friend, “I heard that brothel has a number of fine elven women working there, so he could hardly be blamed.”

  Almira laughed. “So you’re telling me he likes my kind, then?”

  Grimgar let out a wordless cry. “Arrrgh! No, no, no. Tha’ be not wha’ me be sayin’. Ugh, forget it. Pointy eared women would nay understand the problems they cause.” He stomped off ahead of the group, growling at people who got too close to him.

  Almira raised both brows before glancing at Stewart for help. Shaking his head, Stewart explained, “You do know by now, right?”

  Almira sighed, looking away. “Yes, but I don’t know what to do. Neither of our families would be pleased if we got together.”

  “Then maybe it is time to ignore family and do what makes you happy instead,” Flora offered from behind them. Her tail swayed in counterpoint to her hips as she walked. “Men sometimes need a woman to be the one to lead them. Goodness knows they are stupid, lazy creatures otherwise.” Her lips quirked up. “They can’t even take a hint most of the time,” she said, looking directly at Stewart.

  “Then again, maybe if some women would just give the man a chance, they would come to understand more,” Stewart shot back before he stalked off to join Grimgar.

  Flora came up next to Almira. “I don’t understand him.”

  “You and Stewart confuse me to no end. One day, you are both all puppy dog eyes and sweet words, and the next, you’re sniping at each other like today,” Almira shook her head.

  “We have issues, mostly stemming from his Succubus and him. He refuses to do as I ask and until he does, we will not be advancing what I think would be a wonderful relationship. No, he has to play with the hussy once a month to ‘keep her happy,’ he says. Who cares if she’s happy? I want to be happy too.” Flora sighed as she looked down, “We could be so happy if he would just stop caring about spending time with her. We don’t even need her anyway, not with Lilith around.”

  Almira patted her friend’s shoulder. “Flora, I understand what you’re saying, but you should consider his side of things a bit more. You know he was abandoned on the doorstep of the Dead Man Inn as an infant. How do you think he sees just cutting all ties with one of his minions?”

  Her eyes clenched for a moment of frustration as a single tear slid down her cheek. “I know. I know, and I still hate it. I just want him to myself, not to have to share him even for an hour with her.”

  Putting her arm around Flora’s shoulder, Almira wondered if she should talk with Stewart. As she considered it, they reached the Portal Guild and filed inside. They were greeted by a new receptionist named Kathy, who was all smiles and bubbly personality. A young girl sat beside her, a name tag declaring her as Kim.

  “Where are you all off to?” Kathy asked, her voice full of good cheer.

  “The Dead Lands,” Alistern replied with a smile. “Off to see the wastes.”

  Kathy’s smile immediately disappeared. “Are you sure, sir?” The terror in her voice was clear to anyone nearby. “They say that the place is overrun by powerful undead and demons.”

  Chuckling, Alistern dropped a small pile of gold onto the counter. “Aye. This should cover the lot of us.”

  Quickly counting it up, Kathy nodded and put the gold away. A middle aged man with a boy in tow walked down the stairs, approaching them. “Ronald, this group is ready. They are going to the Dead Lands.”

  Ronald let out a whistle. “Hero types, eh? Braver than me, that is for sure. Follow me, brave souls. Oh, and when you get back, please drop by and tell me and my son all about it.”

  Grimgar chuckled, “Aye lad, tha’ I will, if ye be willin’ to buy the ale.”

  Ronald grinned. “Oh, that will be an expensive tale, then. I will do so, brave Dwarf.” Ronald led them up to the top of one of the spires, his son following. “Rolland, why don’t you tell them the next part?”

  “Here is the rune you wanted. Good hunting to you all,” the young boy said.

  Stepping aside, Ronald and Rolland watched the group march past them. Rolland was entranced with the gear the group was wearing, eagerly memorizing the sight of this group of adventurers.

  The party started through with Alistern in the lead, his grey leather making him look like a rogue type and only his staff giving him away as a caster. Stewart was next: his dark red leather and staff marking him as another caster. Flora followed them, her stiff green leather and sickle proclaiming her a Druid to anyone with two brain cells to think with. Grimgar trailed after, his black leathers and twin blades surely marking him as a rogue of some kind. The vials glinting on his belt hinted at poisons, suggesting the Dwarf was an Assassin. Lastly came Almira, who handed Ronald a gold before she also stepped onto the rune. Her plate mail and shield meant she could be either a Defender or Paladin. Just as she was about to touch the rune, Rolland noted the leering face of a demon carved onto the shield, marking her a Paladin of the Dark Lord.

  “What an odd group,” Ronald muttered as he pocketed the gold to split with Kathy later. “Two casters, an Assassin, a Druid, and a Paladin of the Dark Lord. That is the oddest combination I’ve ever seen. Oh well, hope they survive.” With a whistle, he went off to wait for the next group that wanted a portal. “So what did you think of them, Rolland?”

  “I want to grow up and be an adventurer someday, dad! Maybe I'll get to see the Dead Lands firsthand,” Rolland chirped, his voice bright.

  “Maybe one day son, but for now, you should focus on your schooling. No adventurer worth his salt got middling grades,” Ronald replied, tousling his son’s hair. “Why don't you grab Kim from Kathy and go get some breakfast, okay?”

  “Ah, but she's a girl. Girls don't understand how to have fun,” Rolland complained.

  “You will change your tune one day, my boy. Now off you go.” Ronald gave his son a little nudge in the back. “Come back after you've eaten. Today is take your child to work day after all, and we should have at least another couple of portals during my shift.”

  ~*~*~

  The group found themselves just outside the last fort Stormguard had built. The massive structure was heavily fortified, with twenty-foot-thick walls and ballistae every twenty feet along the ramparts. The double gates of adamantine banded ironwood were closed, with only the sally gate opened in one of the doors. Five grim faced guards stood outside the single door, their halberds held up but obviously ready to be brought into play if need be.

  “State your business?” One of the guards asked in a flat tone, eyeing the group. His hand tightened on his weapon when his eyes fell on Stewart.

  “We be goin’ out into the Dead Lands for adventure,” Alistern replied, motioning the party back. “We have no need to enter at this time.”

  The guard nodded, keeping his eyes on Stewart. “Be mindful that any with demon blood in their veins will be kept under close watch inside the walls.”

  Stewart turned away from the guard and summoned his minions; the Imp Illos, the Destroyer Waltrim, the Succubus Tabitha. “Greetings, my friends. We are going out into the Dead Lands, okay?”

  Illos shrugged. “Sure thing.” He flexed his wings as he stretched to his full four-foot height.

  “I will sl
ay them all,” Waltrim rumbled. He shrugged his shield off his back, looking over it and his axe before checking the chain armor he wore.

  “Thank you for the evening the other night, master,” Tabitha said as she plastered herself against Stewart's side. Her soft leather outfit flattered her lush curves. A pair of daggers in matching sheaths adorned the belt riding low on her hips.

  Flora sneered at Tabitha. “Hey, slut. Hands off. We have things to do.”

  Tabitha smiled sweetly at Flora. “Now, now dear flower. Any time you want to join master in keeping me sated, you are welcome to.” Tabitha’s smile was half mocking, as she knew Flora wouldn’t take her up on the offer.

  Flora’s hand went white on the hilt of her sickle. “Maybe I’ll just help you slim down those ridiculous curves the easy way.”

  “Ladies,” Alistern said loudly, “enough. Stew, dismiss Tabitha please. Iffin we need her later, we can bring her back. Right now, she’s only going to aggravate things.”