by Jillian Hart
“It sounds to me like you had to give up everything.”
“Not everything, but it felt that way. One day my life was going great. The next what I’d worked for so hard for years was gone. My career, my life in Seattle, my relationship with Gerald.” Along with the chance to be married, to be a mom and raise kids of her own, but she couldn’t admit that aloud. Not to Sean. Not to anyone.
The pink glint of sunshine hitting her stowed cane was the reminder of why. Seated in a saddle, her disability didn’t show, but it would always be with her and always a part of her. She set her chin, determined to stay positive. “Somehow I have to live with those losses and not let them diminish my life. Whew, that’s a really heavy subject. I say we change topics.”
“If you want.” His expression had turned thoughtful. Nothing could be dreamier than his blue eyes. He could see right through her barriers to places she liked to keep hidden, which was the last thing she wanted.
Yes, a change of topic was definitely a good idea. An electronic chime chose that moment to fill the air, emanating from Sean’s back pocket. Wildflower pricked her ears, listening to the tune, and Eloise patted the mare’s neck in reassurance. She wasn’t noticing how attractive Sean was as he tugged his cell from his back pocket. A shock of dark hair tumbled into his eyes as he studied the screen. Her fingers itched to brush it back into place.
“A rancher’s work is never done,” she commented. “Is it your uncle? If you have to head back, I can find home on my own.”
“No, that’s not it.” He hit a button, silencing the phone, and jammed it into his pocket. He didn’t sound as breezy as he probably meant to. “Personal.”
“Personal? Oh, you so aren’t getting away with that.” She squinted against the sun as the trail wound due west where light glinted off the wide snake of the river. “Tell me.”
“It’s nothing.” A muscle jumped along his strong jaw line. He shrugged one wide, capable shoulder. “No big deal.”
“I know a big deal when I see one.” He wasn’t fooling her. She’d caught the flash of pain in his soulful blue eyes. The tension ratcheting through him was plain to see. She leaned toward him in the saddle, wanting to reach out and afraid to do so. “Avoiding someone?”
“My ex.” He concentrated overly hard on guiding Bandit through the grass.
That was it. No explanation. No elaboration. He turned to marbled stone before her eyes, shutting down, closing up. He was hurting.
Caring poured into her heart, caring she had no right to feel. She brushed a strand of windblown hair out of her eyes, debating what to do. Did she give him his privacy? Or did she express her concern the way any friend would?
“Can I ask why she is calling you?” She tilted toward him, amazed by the display of emotion warring beneath the surface of his set face. He wanted to appear unaffected but that was far from the truth. She read the wince of pain and the shadow of regret. “Didn’t she break up with you?”
“This is the second time she’s called.” Tendons corded in his neck, as if he were holding back pain.
He must have loved her very much. Of course he had, since he’d proposed to the woman. He wasn’t like Gerald, who had been able to move on so easily. Sean felt deeply and truly.
How could any woman not have wanted him? Meryl didn’t know how blessed she was to have had Sean’s love and devotion. Anger speared through her, and she had to look away, take a few deep breaths and focus on the serenity of the daisies dancing in the wild grasses. How could anyone have treated him that way?
“Seems things didn’t work out with the dentist, so she’s decided to apologize to me.” He tried to sound aloof.
He almost pulled it off. She would have believed him if she didn’t know him so well. She tried to sound aloof too, as if she wasn’t hurting and upset on his behalf. “Apologize? Or do you mean she wants you back?”
As he casually shrugged one brawny shoulder again, an attempt at being aloof, muscles rippled beneath his T-shirt and corded in his neck. Her pulse tripped over itself in the silence. Was he going to forgive the woman? Would he go back to her?
That thought doesn’t hurt at all, she told herself, ignoring the arrow of pain burrowing into her. She adjusted the reins and concentrated on getting the sun-warmed leather straps just right between her fingers.
“I don’t want her back.” Sean broke the silence, resolute. “I don’t want to be second-string. Not when it comes to being loved.”
Whew, that was a relief. Tension rolled out of her and she almost slumped in the saddle. “I’ve been there, done that, bought the T-shirt.”
“I have that shirt, too. I was a fool letting her dupe me like that. I didn’t even realize she was seeing someone else.” He tugged his Stetson a notch lower to shade his eyes against the sun, but it also hid the emotions he had to be fighting. “My mom and stepdad have one of the best marriages I’ve seen. I never really thought about it. All those years growing up and watching them, I just thought that was how relationships went. You got along, you were happy and you put the other person first.”
“That was my experience, too.” It felt as if they were in sync as they rode the gently sloping hillside together. Copses of cottonwood and groves of pine cast shade here and there and hid them from the houses popping up at the edge of town. “I just assumed any relationship I had would be the same as my parents’.”
“That’s what I did. I was probably naive, but I couldn’t see the little things that were wrong. When I did, I argued them away.” He guided his big black horse off the trail, turning onto the residential road. His long, wide shadow fell across her. He cleared his throat, but his emotions lingered in the deep notes of his baritone. “If I’d paid attention, maybe I could have ended things earlier and saved myself a lot of agony. I tried too hard to make it work.”
“Me, too.” It was really hard to think straight with Sean at her side. She had to resist the pull of his attractiveness. She had to hold down wishes that could not be brought into the light. “There were little things that were off, things I told myself not to be so picky about. Gerald always wanted things his way, he forgot the courteous little touches, he always picked the movie we watched. Now and then I worried I was an afterthought to him.”
“You told yourself he was busy or had a lot on his mind or that no one is perfect and that you weren’t being accepting enough?”
“Exactly.” That was it. “Gerald was good to me, not great, but good. I could explain everything away because of the stress of our constant training and competing. We were world champions. Maintaining our title was hard work and pressure. The excuses I made for him came very easily and I didn’t even realize it.”
“I understand. Once my eyes were opened, I felt stupid because I settled for so little. I couldn’t see her behavior for what it was. She didn’t want me to see it, but she was biding her time with me.” His voice steeled, rising powerfully above the knell of the horse hooves on the paved street. “When she thought she could do better, she did.”
“She could not do better, Sean. Not by a long shot.” For all his manly strength, he was as vulnerable at heart as she was. He had been devastated as thoroughly. Heartbreak played no favorites but hurt equally. “You loved her truly.”
“I thought so, but now I’m not so sure. If it were true love, then my feelings toward her would never fade. They did.” He shrugged, sitting taller in his saddle, his chest up, his shoulders straight, his dignity showing.
She admired him so, so much. She feared she liked him even more.
The leisurely dance of a country sunset was deepening with its last chorus. The underbellies of fluffy, marshmallow clouds blazed with bold purples, pinks and reds. Sunset cast jeweled tones into the light that enveloped them like a sign from above. Tall trees cast long shadows over the land and over the occasional house lining the road. Her driveway came into sight and she sighed with sadness. Their ride was at an end.
She hated drawing Wildflower to a stop. For a wh
ile, for the length of the ride, she had been able to forget about the cane tucked into the saddle straps. She dismounted, struggling to keep the smile on her face and to hold on to their moment of closeness. She gripped her cane tightly and handed over the reins to Sean. “Thanks for riding with me home.”
“I could have taken you in the truck.” He tied a loose knot in the end of the reins and looped them over his saddle horn. “But I thought this would be nicer.”
“It was.” Nice. That was one word for it. Illuminating was another. She tried with all her strength to keep from feeling a single thing as Sean tipped his hat to her.
“Good night, Eloise. I’ll see you.” He wheeled the horses around to retrace his trail home, sitting so strong and tall in the saddle he took her breath away. “My horse trailer is ready to roll any time you need it.”
“I’m still keeping Cheyenne as an option.”
“Funny.” He held up one hand, riding away into the shadows and the dying rays of light.
Do not fall, she warned herself. Do not even start to fall for the man. He was certain heartbreak waiting to happen.
Chapter Thirteen
In the heat of the mid-afternoon sun, Frank Granger strolled into the main horse barn, whistling. His sons were busy walking the north herd’s fence line checking wire. Autumn and Addy were working horses in the arena; he could hear the faint ring of his daughters’ laughter as he ambled down the breezeway. The stalls were empty this time of day, smelling of fresh straw and hay, the horses out grazing in the shade of the cottonwoods. It felt good knowing everything was going fine, his kids had the place running like a top and for the first time in years he had leisure time. May as well make good use of it.
“Got Rogue saddled and ready,” Scotty called out, giving the gelding a pat. The ranch hand had been working for the Granger family for too many decades to count. “You’ve been taking off a lot lately.”
“That I have.” Rogue gave a deep-throated nicker, one of welcome and friendship. He and Rogue had been together a long time, too. He loved his horse because Rogue didn’t toss him the knowing grins everyone else in this town did. Rogue held his tongue and didn’t ask questions about a certain lady Frank was seeing. Rogue understood a man liked to keep some things private.
“Going to see Cady again?” Scotty stood there grinning, silvered hair slicked back. He crossed his arms over his barrel chest, expecting a confession that wasn’t going to come.
“Thought I’d take Rogue out on the river trail.” He untied the rein from the wall ring and stroked Rogue’s nose. The gelding leaned in, a whicker rumbling deep in his throat.
“The river trail. That goes all the way to the other side of town.” Scotty didn’t give up. His grin broadened. “Cady’s inn is on the other side of town right along that trail.”
“What’s your point, Scotty?” He swung into the saddle. With a touch of the reins, Rogue backed and moved into the aisle.
“You’re spending a lot of time with that fine lady.” Humor twinkled in dark eyes. “When are you gonna get up the gumption and propose to her?”
“Just you mind your own business.” Frank laughed, shaking his head. Wasn’t that everyone’s question these days? “I’ve been a bachelor a long time. I might just be stringing her along, unable to commit.”
“I say it’s soon.” Scotty, more friend than employee, belted out a laugh. “You’ve been bitten hard. You’re in love with her.”
“The better question everyone should be asking is how she feels about me.” That concerned him. Heat stained his face as Rogue trotted into the sunny yard. His romance with Cady Winslow was as sweet as could be, but it was hard to know if the hopes taking root in his heart matched hers. He nosed Rogue out of the barn and down the hill.
“Dad, are you going to see Cady?” Addy’s singsong alto lilted across the fields where horses grazed. She sat on the back of her dappled mare, ponytail askew and grinning wide. Looked like she’d been racing barrels.
“Where else would he be going?” Autumn sidled the mare she was working on up to the end of the arena, opened up to let in the fresh air and sun. She beamed happiness as she waved. It was good to see his girls on top of the world, Autumn about to be married, Addy home graduated from college. “Have fun! Give Cady a hug from me.”
“And from me, too!” Addy chimed in.
“Will do.” He held up a hand and kept riding, glad for the expansive distance of the fields because they made a long conversation impossible. Horses looked up from their grazing and whinnied, others bounded across the grass toward him. On his other side the yearling calves bawled and leaned against the wooden fence. Buttercup and her troop joined in.
“No time to chat, ladies,” he called out to all the creatures on both sides of the fence. “I’ll make it up to you later, promise.”
Buttercup mooed as if her heart would break. Jasmine and Daisy joined in, their lows rising above the horses’ disapproving neighs. Cheyenne would spoil them appropriately in his stead after her long day at the vet clinic was done. He swelled with pride at his daughter, who was doing so well. Mrs. Gunderson climbed the porch steps with a basket on her hip, done with her work in the garden.
“Looks like it’s just you and me for a bit, Rogue.”
The gelding answered with an agreeable nicker. Larks sang, robins hopped along searching for an early supper and on the far rise of the hill he caught sight of the faint figures of his sons bent to their work stringing wire. He swelled a little more with pride in his boys, working the land. Justin happily married, Tucker about to become a husband. Life was good.
The Lord had blessed him richly in all his children, no doubt about that.
His phone rang, proof his day was never done. He hoped it wasn’t a problem that would pull him back to the ranch. He dug his phone from his pocket and checked the screen. It wasn’t work, which puzzled him. “Sandi Walters, what can I do for you?”
“You have the nicest housekeeper, Frank. I just talked with her up at the main house. I invited her to our Bible study at the church on Thursday.” Sandi Walters worked at the diner and had always been as friendly as could be to his kids. Hard not to appreciate that, even if she’d always been a tad too friendly to him ever since her divorce.
“It’s awful kind of you.” He leaned back in his saddle guiding Rogue onto the stretch of the county road. The empty ribbon of blacktop was framed by overgrown grass nodding in the wind. “I’m sure Mrs. G. was glad for the offer.”
“She was. Say, the reason I’m calling is about the rumor I’ve been hearing.”
“Which one would that be?”
“That your nephew and the youngest Tipple girl are taking in unwanted horses?”
“For once, a rumor in this town is true.” Frank chuckled, relieved he didn’t have to try to dodge any rumors about his personal life. “You wouldn’t happen to know of a needy horse?”
“I do. Would the kids be interested?”
“I’m sure they would. I’ll let Sean know.”
“Wonderful. It was good talking with you, Frank. I suppose everything is going well with your family?”
“Just fine. Hope everything is well with yours.” Rogue turned down Tucker’s dirt access road, already knowing where they were headed. Not much got past that horse. The gelding lifted his head, scenting the air, and swiveled his ears. Sean must be nearby. Rogue was an eavesdropper from way back.
Frank said goodbye, pocketed his phone and patted Rogue’s neck. “As you heard, we are on a detour. Sean must be around here somewhere.”
The spread Tucker had bought shone like an emerald in the sunshine, green fields, growing crops, reaching trees. A small herd of sheep dotted the hillside like dollops of white fluff. Lambs played tag, running and frolicking under the watchful eyes of their mothers. A figure rose out of the herd and lifted a hand.
Sean. The boy had a way with all creatures, cattle, horses, even sheep. He scribbled on a notebook. Must be updating records now that the lambs
were tagged and their inoculations were due. Frank urged Rogue up to the fence line. While Sean hiked across the field, Frank texted him Sandi’s number. “Found another horse for Cady’s stable,” he called out.
“Great.” Sean might think he was fooling everyone, but the only one he was fooling was himself. The young man’s eyes didn’t light up because of a horse. No, a certain young lady had something to do with that. Sean hauled out his phone and glanced at the screen, acting casual, as if the gal was no big deal. “I’ll give Eloise a call. She’ll be pleased.”
“Sure, and it’s fortunate you have a horse trailer to help out.” He held back any teasing remarks because he knew what it was like to be a man deeply in love.
“Looks like Cady is going to have a full barn if this keeps up.”
“This economy has been tough on horses, too.” Sean moseyed up to the fence, shoulders wide, unaware of the sheep, Cotton Ball, trailing him. “Do you think Tucker will mind if I take off?”
“No, I’ll give him a call for you. You just go with Eloise and rescue that horse. That’s important.” Frank tipped his hat in farewell and reined Rogue away from the fence. Cotton Ball gave a protesting baaah.
“Then I’d better get my trailer hitched up.” Sean probably figured he’d kept the anticipation out of his voice and the twinkle from his eyes, but he would be wrong.
The boy was head over heels. It took someone in the same spot to recognize it. Lord, please watch over my nephew. He might need a little bit of help.
Frank shook his head, chuckling to himself as he and Rogue headed in the direction of Cady’s inn.
See how he didn’t feel a single thing when Eloise breezed into sight? Sean grinned to himself, pleased his strategy was working. He opened the truck door for her as she padded down the inn’s front steps, leaning on her cane. He hardly noticed the dip of her gait, for her beauty outshone everything. Her hair was down, unbounded, falling across her slender shoulders like liquid gold. She’d pulled on blue jeans, although she wore a ruffled blouse, which obviously had been meant to go with a classy blazer and a skirt.
