‘And what of you, Eliza? You, too, started the ball well. You danced with Mr Darcy.’
‘You mean Mr Darcy did his duty and danced with his sister’s companion, who would otherwise have been a wallflower!’ said Elizabeth teasingly.
Charlotte smiled at her sally but said, ‘I think it was more than that. I have seen him looking at you once or twice in a way that suggests there is more to it than that. I think he admires you.’
‘Charlotte! You make me laugh. Mr Darcy is a very proud man. I confess, I have found him to be kinder and more considerate than I expected, but the idea of him admiring me is ridiculous. He never thinks of me except in connection with his sister. He adores her and he likes anyone who makes her life more agreeable. That is all.’
‘I think you are wrong, Lizzy. If you have any moments alone with him you must make the most of them. Even a man as great as Mr Darcy is capable of falling in love, and if you encourage him there is no saying where it might lead.’
‘I can tell you where it will lead, if I play the coquette,’ said Elizabeth. ‘It will lead to the loss of my self respect, and the loss of Mr Darcy’s respect. He will no doubt dismiss me if I do anything so foolish. He does not like those who play up to him. Believe me, I have seen it happen. Miss Bingley has set her cap at him and he despises her for it.’
‘I do not suggest you play the coquette. I only suggest you make the most of your opportunities to dazzle him with your wit and make him aware of your intelligence.’
Elizabeth shook her head with a smile.
‘You mean well, Charlotte, but you would do better to pay attention to your own opportunities, than to manufacture them for Jane and myself. You, too, began the ball well. I saw you dancing with Mr Jones.’
The conversation moved on to Charlotte’s partner.
Elizabeth continued to chuckle to herself over Charlotte’s suggestion that Mr Darcy admired her, until one moment when she happened to look round and found his eyes upon her. He quickly averted his gaze but she began to wonder if what Charlotte said could be true.
She found the thought perplexing but exciting. If she was honest with herself, she was attracted to Mr Darcy. He had many amiable qualities, besides being handsome and rich. He was intelligent and, when he chose, he could be a very stimulating companion. He was also a man she could admire and respect.
But above all this there was something else, something extra. She did not know exactly what it was, but when he walked into a room she felt the colours were brighter, the sounds clearer, the scents stronger – all her senses were heightened. And when he helped her into a carriage, her hand tingled. She remembered it even now. It was something she had never felt before. She had never been so attracted to a man before.
Her eyes rested on him as she thought all this, but as soon as Sir William Lucas came over to her, and started talking to her, the spell was broken. She remembered that Mr Darcy was her employer, and she remembered that he had a much higher social standing than she did. It had been true even when her parents had been alive. It was much more so now, when he was her employer. Even if they were attracted to each other, it could go nowhere, and so she reminded herself that she must not think of something that could never happen.
She felt deflated, but she did not let it show.
She must not let anyone guess her feelings, particularly Miss Bingley, for it would expose her to ridicule. She must concentrate on being the best companion she could be to Miss Darcy, and that must be the end of it.
Chapter Twelve
The following morning, Mr Darcy called Georgiana into the library. He asked her about the ball and talked to her about her forthcoming visit to Longbourn.
‘What did you think of the Miss Bennets?’ he asked.
‘I thought they were very pleasant,’ said Georgiana.
Mr Darcy nodded, then said, ‘You are of an age now to start learning how to judge people, Georgiana. I will always be there to give you advice and look after you, but I cannot be always with you. You must learn how to protect yourself as well, so that when we are not together you will be able to guard yourself from those who would do you harm.’
Georgiana flushed.
‘I grieved you greatly in the summer. I am sorry for it. I believed Mrs Younge when she said that you would approve of my marriage to Mr Wickham but I should have known better.’
‘You had not had a chance to develop your own ability to judge people, but I want to make sure you have it now. Judging people is not the same as sitting in judgement on them, or criticising them. It means listening to what they have to say; seeing how they act; deciding whether their opinions and actions are ones you can esteem. It also means developing your own notions of right and wrong so that you can be strong in the face of temptation and preserve your own pride and self-respect. Now I am going to ask you about the Miss Bennets and I want you to give me your honest opinion of them. Whatever you say will not go beyond these four walls. Do you understand?’
‘Yes, I do.’
‘Very well. You spoke to all the Miss Bennets. What do you think of them?’
‘I like Jane – Miss Bennet - very much. She is kind and gentle, with never a bad word to say about anyone.’
‘Is that a good thing, do you think?’
Georgiana was startled.
‘I . . . I do not know. Perhaps not.’ She blushed as she remembered Mr Wickham. It would have been better if someone had said a bad word about him, to warn her against him.
‘Would you accept her word about someone, or would you temper it with your own judgement?’ he asked.
Georgiana hesitated, thinking. Then she said, ‘I would think about what she said, and ask myself if her sweet nature made her too generous.’
‘Good,’ he said approvingly. ‘You are thinking for yourself. Now tell me what you thought of Miss Mary Bennet.’
‘She is very serious.’ She paused and then said, ‘But also rather dull. Where her sister Miss Jane sees too much good in people, Miss Mary Bennet sees not enough.’
‘That is so. And the other Miss Bennets?’
‘Miss Kitty and Miss Lydia are both lively companions. I like them, though I would not follow Miss Lydia as Miss Kitty does. I think Miss Kitty should stand out against her sometimes. Miss Lydia has high spirits but she is too noisy.’
Mr Darcy smiled.
‘I can see that you are already starting to learn about people. That is a good thing. It will help to protect you when I am not there. Very well. You may go and get ready. I know you are due at Longbourn this morning. You should continue to use your judgement. Your opinions of the Miss Bennets might change as you get to know them better. Never be afraid of changing your mind if you find you have been wrong.’ He saw her expression and she looked surprised. ‘What is it?’ he asked,
‘It is just that I have heard you say that your good opinion, once lost, is lost forever. And yet now you tell me I must not be afraid of changing my mind. Those two things seen to be opposite.’
He shook his head.
‘No, they are not,’ he said. ‘The reason is that I am very careful about withdrawing my good opinion. I do not do so hastily, and I only do so with ample proof that I am right.’
‘I will remember,’ she said. ‘But you have not asked me what I think of Miss Elizabeth Bennet.’
‘I think I know your opinion there,’ he said. ‘You like her. I can see it in the way your spirits have lifted since knowing her. Your confidence has also grown.’
‘Yes, I like her. I think you like her, too.’
Mr Darcy stiffened. He did not want his sister to suspect he might have an unusual liking for Miss Elizabeth, nor did he want anyone else to suspect it. A man in his position had to be very careful not to raise expectations.
‘She is a very good companion, and for that I like her,’ he replied. ‘She does not encourage you in foolishness, but at the same time she allows you more freedom than you were accustomed to. It has been good for you, and I am glad tha
t you and she have become friends.’ He felt he had said quite enough about Miss Elizabeth. To say more would prolong the conversation and he was wary of where it might lead. ‘Now off you go to Longbourn. I can hear the carriage being brought round to the front door. Enjoy yourself, but remember: you must listen to the people you are with, and watch them, and not accept them at their own valuation, for not everyone in the world is good.’
‘I will take care,’ she said.
She gave him a dazzling smile and then ran lightly from the room.
A few minutes later he saw her going out to the carriage, accompanied by Miss Elizabeth.
Georgiana was right when she said he liked Miss Elizabeth. He did. He was attracted to her independent spirit and her sense of fun, which her personal tragedy had not been able to quench. He admired her courage and her ready wit. But he reminded himself that he did not yet know everything about her. He gave a slow, lingering smile as he thought that he was very fortunate, for the coming weeks would allow him to know her better.
He stood up and went over to the window. The carriage was just departing and in the back seat he could make out Miss Elizabeth. As he watched the carriage rolling away, he found he did not know whether he wanted to find some flaw in her which would break his unsuitable attraction, or whether he hoped he would not find any, for Miss Elizabeth Bennet was becoming one of the most important people in his life.
The trip to Longbourn was the first of many. The young ladies talked over the ball and Georgiana found the new experience exhilarating. For the first time in her life it was as if she had sisters. On returning to Netherfield Park, she asked her brother if she could invite the Miss Bennets to tea the following day. He gave his permission and it was arranged.
Those meetings were often repeated. Over the following weeks, the inhabitants of Longbourn and Netherfield often met, sometimes by design and sometimes by accident whilst shopping in Meryton, or walking in the country. There were many social gatherings at neighbouring houses which included both the Netherfield and Longfield inhabitants. The landed gentry were eager to make Mr Bingley welcome, and where Mr Bingley went, Mr and Miss Darcy went, too. Where Miss Darcy went, Elizabeth went, and although she was a companion she was never made to feel like a servant. Instead she was treated as a trusted friend.
Mr Bingley’s attentions to Jane continued. Charlotte Lucas often commented on it, and Elizabeth saw it with growing pleasure. It was evident whenever they met that Mr Bingley admired Jane. To Elizabeth it was equally evident that Jane was yielding to the preference which she had begun to entertain for Mr Bingley from the first, and was in a way to falling in love. However, she teased Charlotte whenever Charlotte mentioned it, for Elizabeth did not want it gossiped about until Mr Bingley had declared himself, which she felt sure he must soon do.
The subject arose again some weeks later, when they met at a dinner hosted by the Purvises.
‘Jane should encourage him,’ said Charlotte, looking at Jane and Mr Bingley, who were once again sitting together. ‘She has such a calm character that he might not discern her feelings, and it is a brave man indeed who will persist where he finds no encouragement.’
‘It is not in her nature to encourage him, at least not as you mean it, but her feelings are there for him to read,’ said Elizabeth. ‘He has spent a great deal of time in her company over the past few weeks, and if I can see her partiality for him then he should be able to see it, too.’
‘You forget that Mr Bingley does not know Jane as well as you do. What is obvious to you might not be obvious to him. When they are together they speak of commonplaces. She should lead him to speak on deeper subjects.’
‘On love, I suppose you mean,’ said Elizabeth.
‘No, not on love, that would be unmaidenly. But she could ask about his family and ask him if he means to settle here – oh, there are ways for a woman if she wants to fix a man.’
It did not occur to Elizabeth that Charlotte might be talking about Charlotte’s own situation, as well as Jane’s, for Elizabeth did not know that Charlotte had set her mind to marrying Mr Collins. Charlotte was now almost on the shelf and as she hardly ever met any new gentlemen, her chances of marriage were dwindling into almost nothing. Therefore, she had been very interested to see Mr Collins come into the neighbourhood. When it became known that he was not to marry Jane, Charlotte had set her mind to becoming Mrs Collins before the year was out.
If Elizabeth had known of Charlotte’s plans she would have been shocked and horrified. Luckily for her peace of mind she did not, and so she continued to talk of Jane and Mr Bingley.
‘Jane is incapable of trying to fix a man,’ said Elizabeth. ‘But she is getting to know Mr Bingley in her own way.’
She, too, was watching Jane, who was speaking without reserve to Mr Bingley. The two made an attractive couple. Jane’s beauty outshone every other woman there, and Mr Bingley’s attention to her was delightful to see. They always had a lot to say to each other, and conversation never ceased between them.
‘She has plenty of opportunities to develop their intimacy,’ said Charlotte, following Elizabeth’s gaze. ‘She should use them.’
‘I think she uses them very well,’ said Elizabeth. ‘She is getting to know him better with every day.’ She added mischievously, ‘Why, only yesterday she told me they both like Vingt-et-un better than Commerce!’
Charlotte did not smile.
‘It is all very well joking, Lizzy, but Mr Collins will move in to Longbourn at the end of the year and then where will you go? I would like to see Jane settled by then, or at least betrothed. It would relieve my mind to know you will all be able to live at Netherfield Park.’
‘Dear Charlotte, you are very good to think of us, but I believe we must leave Jane to manage her own affairs in her own way.’
If she had known that Charlotte was anxious about where the Miss Bennets would live in the New Year, because Charlotte intended to be the mistress of Longbourn by then, her friendship towards Charlotte would have cooled at once. But, as it was, the two of them chatted in a friendly fashion until it was time for dinner. Georgiana was escorted into dinner by young Mr Purvis, a gentleman who was a year her senior. She was now much more confident in company and had blossomed as she had grown accustomed to adult society. Although she was too young to be formally out, it was permissible for her to attend small, private gatherings. Mr Darcy continued to allow her to attend the local assemblies as well, saying she must learn to mix with people from all levels in life, and remarking that the assemblies allowed her to do this in safety.
Mr Darcy escorted Miss Bingley into dinner, and Mr Grandison escorted Charlotte. The other guests were all paired off with their dining partners.
Elizabeth found herself sitting near to Mrs Purvis at dinner and the conversation turned once again to Jane.
‘There will be a wedding there before long,’ said Mrs Purvis, looking towards Jane and Mr Bingley.
‘I beg you will not speak of it,’ said Elizabeth. ‘Nothing is certain, and it does no good to speak of these things prematurely.’
It was one thing to speak of it openly to Charlotte, when the two of them were standing alone in a corner of the room. It was another to speak of it at the dinner table, where their conversation could be heard by others.
‘How right you are,’ said Mrs Purvis. ‘My lips are sealed. I will not mention it again. However, we will all be pleased to see her settled at Netherfield Park.’
Elizabeth, looking up, saw that Mr Darcy’s eyes were upon her. She hoped he had not overheard the conversation. The people of Meryton were fond of Jane, and for that reason they wished her well. But the world in general looked askance at young ladies who fell in love before the gentleman in question had declared himself, and Elizabeth was fervent in wishing it unnoticed as yet. She did not want any undue pressure placed on either her sister or Mr Bingley.
Luckily, Mr Darcy was at the other end of the table and most probably had not heard. In fact, his eyes re
sted on her only for a moment and then went to his sister, who was conducting herself in an elegant fashion.
Elizabeth was well pleased with her charge. Georgiana was the sweetest girl, and Elizabeth could not have wished for more congenial employment. Then, too, she had the satisfaction of knowing she was doing Georgiana good. Georgiana had lost her hesitant manner and was now able to converse with strangers without blushing. It was delightful to see.
After dinner, the ladies withdrew. The gentleman joined them soon afterwards. Miss Bingley sat down at the piano and entertained them all with a rattling sonata, after which Elizabeth persuaded Georgiana to play. Georgiana was equally proficient, but there was a lightness of touch about her performance which set it far above Miss Bingley’s.
Mr Darcy joined Elizabeth when Georgiana gave way at the pianoforte to Mrs Hurst.
‘I want to thank you for everything you have done for Georgiana,’ he said. ‘She has become a different girl under your care. I may say, a different young lady, for she is growing up before my eyes. I tried to keep her as a child for as long as possible because I was afraid of losing the endearing little girl I knew, but she is becoming an admirable young lady, and it has helped me to let the little girl go.’
Elizabeth breathed a barely audible sigh of relief.
‘I know it is difficult to see those we love growing up,’ she said. At that moment there was a commotion at the far end of the room. Lydia was demanding some dancing, and she was doing it in a typically noise and ebullient fashion. ‘Although I could wish my own sister would grow up sooner rather than later,’ she admitted ruefully.
Mr Darcy smiled.
‘It is a wonder to me how different you all are. Five Miss Bennets, and yet only one Miss Elizabeth.’
She looked at him in some confusion. What did he mean by it?
A Companion For Miss Darcy: A Pride and Prejudice Variation Page 13
