by Violet Duke
âYou want to come with?â Eric, one of Jamisonâs friends from his old department in Atlantaâand the man responsible for strong-arming Jamison into coming on this camping tripâbroke into his thoughts.
Jamison glanced up, surprised to see Eric and Freddie had finished eating, while his own plate was still half full of ribs and potato salad. âGo where?â he asked, not missing the look Eric and Freddie exchanged across the table. âSorry, I was zoning out.â
âDoes it have anything to do with that girl youâve been staring at all day?â Eric asked, a smirk on his face Jamison didnât care for.
With his thick blond hair, bright blue eyes, and gym rat physique, Eric looked like the kind of guy who would have no trouble picking up girls. But there was something about him that turned off all the genuinely cool women he encountered.
Probably because Eric valued women about as much as he valued the fish in the custom tank he kept in his apartmentâthe ones he never remembered to feed and simply replaced when they went belly-up. Cool women were generally smart women; they saw through Ericâs facade and steered clear from the get go.
âHer name is Maddie.â Jamison did his best to keep his tone light, but knew heâd failed when Ericâs smirk spread wider and Freddie laughed beneath his breath.
âMaddie,â Freddie mimicked with an exaggerated sigh, batting his eyelashes. âWhat a pretty name.â
âShut up.â Jamison threw his wadded up napkin at Freddieâs face, but the other man dodged it easily.
Freddie was smaller than both Jamison and Eric, but he was lean and fast, making him one of the best tillermen Jamison had ever met. Heâd also been through a rough divorce last year, and didnât seem quite ready to jump back into the dating pool. More than one attractive woman had approached him while they were goofing off on the beach, but Freddie hadnât been anything more than polite.
âRelax.â Freddie held up his hands in surrender. âSheâs cute, man. I say go for it.â
âSheâs got amazing tits,â Eric said, earning a scowl from Jamison. He and Eric had never been as close as he and Freddie, and hearing Eric talk about Maddie like she was a piece of meat reminded him why.
âManners, man,â Freddie said, beating Jamison to it. âYouâre not at a strip club.â
âNo, if I were at a strip club, I wouldnât be surrounded by sixes and sevens.â Eric sighed as he cast a bored glance around the picnic tables, where the crowd was thinning as people finished their meals and retreated to the beach or down the trails for one last hike before darkness fell. âOr if I were, at least theyâd be topless.â Eric shifted his attention back to Jamison. âSo are you coming or not?â
âWe were going to head into town,â Freddie supplied. âThought we might hit that honky-tonk we saw near the exit to the highway, get a few beers, see if Eric has better luck with the ladies there.â
Eric leaned across the table to punch Freddie on the arm hard enough to make the smaller man grunt. âHalf these women are closet dykes, man,â Eric said. âThatâs the only reason Iâm striking out.â
âIâm going to stay here,â Jamison said, resisting the urge to tell Eric his attitude was probably more to blame than any of the womenâs sexual orientation. He had better things to do than fight with Eric, namely finding Maddie and putting an end to the suspense that had kept his stomach in knots all day.
âAll right. Good luck with your girl,â Freddie said, clapping Jamison on the back as he stood and grabbed his empty plate.
âYeah, at least one of us should get some action this weekend,â Eric said as he rose and followed Freddie.
As the two other men walked away, Jamison sent up a silent prayer of thanks that neither Eric nor Freddie had heard anything while Maddie was in his tent last night. Jamison didnât want to share those sexy little sounds Maddie made when she came with anyone.
Speaking of Maddieâ¦
Jamison did a casual survey of the remaining diners, heart leaping when his eyes met Maddieâs across the picnic tables. Sheâd been watching him. Hopefully that was a good sign, and not an indication she was thinking about ways to let him down easy.
Jamison grabbed his plate and tossed it into the garbage bin, trying not to feel guilty for leaving it half-full. Heâd been too nervous too eat.
Too nervous to eat? What are you, a sixteen-year-old girl?
âApparently,â Jamison muttered to himself, downing the rest of his beer and tossing the bottle into the recycling container, pulse picking up as Maddie excused herself and crossed the picnic grounds to meet him.
In a dark blue sundress and pair of athletic-looking sandals, she shouldnât have taken his breath away, but she did. He couldnât keep his eyes from skimming over herâfrom the curly brown hair swirling around her shoulders, to her curves, to her toned legs disappearing into her sensible sandals. She looked good enough to eat, and Jamison suddenly found heâd recovered his appetiteâ¦though this particular appetite wouldnât be satisfied by ribs or potato salad.
âWant to walk on the beach?â Maddie asked, a cautious look in her eyes that did nothing to allay Jamisonâs fears.
So what if she tries to let you down easy? That doesnât mean thatâs the end of it. You donât go down easyânever have, never will.
âSounds good.â Jamison fell in beside her as she set off toward the sound of the ocean waves pounding the shore.
It was true, heâd never gone down easy, but that wasnât always a good thing. If heâd backed off the first time Wendy had rebuffed him, he could have spared them both so much guilt and heartache.
But he hadnât backed off, heâd used the heated glances Wendy shot his way when she came to visit Art at the station as an excuse to cross the line, to apply another round of pressure one night when they were walking to their cars after a mutual friendâs party. Sure, Wendy had caved without more than a few whispered words, but still. Jamison knew things could have been differentâwould have been different, if he had simply taken no for an answer.
But he didnât want to take no for an answer with Maddie. Last night had been more than insanely hot sex, it had been one of the best nights of his life, period. It wasnât simply that heâd finally met a woman who was his match sexually, it was because that woman was Maddie, a person who had been a friend since he was too young to understand that the warm, safe feeling that filled his chest whenever he was around the Whitehouse girls was a kind of love.
And look how you confused that kind of love for something more with Naomi. Look how that turned out. Now you can barely say three words to her without wanting to make a run for it. Keep this up, and youâll wreck things with Maddie, too.
Jamison sighed as he and Maddie stepped onto the sand, grateful the sound was swallowed by the roar of the waves. It was true; he could be on the verge of ruining one of his longest-standing friendships.
But then, heâd meant what heâd said to Maddieâhe could never go back to the way things were. The memory of her riding him in the moonlight filtering through his tent was permanently etched upon his brain. They were either going to move forward as more than friends, or they werenât going to move forward at all.
The knowledge was enough to make his palms sweat as Maddie turned back to him, the setting sun catching the caramel streaks in her hair, making her even prettier than sheâd been a moment before.
âSo?â Jamison asked, after an uncomfortable moment of silence. âWhatâs the verdict?â
âWhatâs your end game?â Maddie asked, answering his question with a question.
Jamison blinked. âUm, nothing. I want to spend time with you.â
Maddie shook her head, the skin between her eyebrows wrinkling. âNo, I mea
n, with dating. Why do you date? Whatâs your end game? Do you even have one?â
Jamison fought the urge to pull Maddie into his arms and kiss the frown from her face. It was a decent question, and one that deserved an honest answer. âI donât know. I mean, someday Iâd like to find someone, get married, I guess. I donât want to play the field forever.â
âBut youâre already thirty-one. By your age, most men who are looking for Mrs. Right have either found her, or found her and divorced her, â Maddie said, clearly not willing to let him off easy, but then Maddie never did. It was one of the reasons Jamison had always respected her, even back when they were kids.
Jamison nodded. âYouâre right. And Iâm the first to admit that in the past, I wasnât looking too hard for Mrs. Right. I was more concerned with Mrs. Right Now. Then I moved to Atlanta and I was so busy with work I didnât have much time for dating.â He hesitated before pushing on, wanting Maddie to know at least part of the truth. âThere was a woman last year who I thought⦠We cared a lot about each other, and I was hoping weâd have a future, but it didnât work out.â
âWhy?â Maddie asked, pinning him with her unflinching gaze.
He sighed. âA lot of reasons, the main one being that moving forward with me would have meant a big life change for her, and she wasnât ready for that. In the end, she decided sheâd rather stay in a familiar, less-than-perfect situation than try for something more.â
Maddie pressed her lips together, appearing to take a moment to digest what heâd said before she spoke again. âI can understand that. I think thatâs why Serge stayed with me for so many years, even after he knew that he didnât love me in that way. Our marriage was familiar, and good in a lot of ways.â
Jamison nodded, wishing Maddie hadnât had to go through that with her ex. She seemed to be at peace with it, but he knew it had been painful, and he didnât like the thought of Maddie hurting.
âBut I donât want good anymore,â Maddie continued, a vulnerable look in her eyes that made it harder to resist the urge to draw her into his arms. âI want passion and fun and friendship and someone who is open to dating becoming something more. I came to this retreat promising myself this would be the beginning of a new me, that I would learn to let my hair down and have a little fun while I was waiting to find the right guy, but Iâve been thinking all dayâ¦â
She sighed, turning to stare out at the water, where the waves crashed into the shore in a burst of foam. âThatâs not me,â she said, almost too softly to hear over the sound of the surf. âIâm not a casual kind of person, and I donât want to date someone whoâs only after a good time.â
Jamison placed a hand on her shoulder and gently turned her to face him. âWho said Iâm only after a good time?â
Maddie shrugged, nibbling at her lip for a moment before she said, âFrom what Iâve seen, your dating relationships donât seem to last too long.â
âThatâs not always been my choice,â Jamison said. âThere are a lot of women out there who arenât up for anything long-term, either, especially with a guy they think is a dumb meat head.â
Maddie smiled. âYouâre a lot things, but a dumb meat head isnât one of them.â
âAnd youâre not some random woman,â he said, letting his fingers slide up to curl around the back of her neck. âYouâre Maddie. I know the type of person you are. If I wasnât on board for something more than casual, I wouldnât be here right now. I wouldnât have asked to date you. And when I say âdate,â I mean exclusively, you and me giving this a shot to see if we work as more than friends.â
Maddieâs brow furrowed again. âReally?â
âReally,â Jamison said with a smile.
âBut why?â she asked, obviously still struggling. âWhy now, after all these years of you teasing me like Iâm your bratty little sister? What changed?â
âI guess I finally woke up,â Jamison said, bringing his face closer to hers. âAnd Iâm glad I did, because you are the sexiest friend Iâve ever had.â
Maddieâs breath feathered out, caressing his lips, making him hungry for another taste of her. âYouâre pretty sexy yourself.â
âThanks,â Jamison said softly. âSo can I kiss you now? Are we good?â
Maddieâs tongue swept out to dampen her lips, making it almost impossible to resist claiming her mouth, but Jamison forced himself to wait. He wanted to be sure they were on the same page.
âI still want to keep it a secret from Naomi and Jake until after the wedding,â Maddie said, her arms twining around Jamisonâs neck, sending a wave of relief and desire sweeping through him. âAnd I want us to promise we wonât let anything that happens between us interfere with being good godparents to Noelle. She deserves the best from us, not any drama.â
âI agree,â Jamison said, pulling Maddie closer. âNow can I kiss you?â
Maddie smiled. âNot if I kiss you first.â
And then she kissed him, banishing any lingering doubt that last night had been a fluke. Her kiss still destroyed him, leaving him raw and stripped bare and starving for more of her, though heâd practically gorged himself on loving her the night before. But when it came to Maddie, he had a feeling he wouldnât ever get enough of her taste, her touch, the way she moaned when the sparks between them ignited.
As her tongue danced with his and her back arched, pressing her breasts tighter to his chest, Jamison swore he literally felt the earth move. She shook things loose inside him, leaving him different than he was before. But it wasnât a bad different, it was the kind of change that made you wonder how a world without the person in your arms could ever have been enough.
By the time they pulled apart, Jamisonâs heart was pounding and his body crying out to get closer to Maddie, to get as close as two people can get and then closer still, until there was nothing separating them but skin.
âThis is crazy,â Maddie said, her breath coming fast.
âWhat?â Jamison asked, sliding his hands down to cup her bottom, pulling her closer to where he ached.
Her lids fluttered before she met his eyes with a desire-filled look that took the last of his breath away. âI want you more than I did last night. I was pretty sure that was impossible.â
âAnd I want you so much, Iâm tempted to take you right here on the sand.â
She bit her lip. âWhy donât we try somewhere a little more private? I saw a lifeguard stand about a mile down the beach earlier today. I checked the door and it wasnât locked.â
âYou checked the door?â Jamison took her hand, letting her lead the way across the sand. âSo you were thinking about having your way with me again, were you?â
âAll. Day. Long,â she said in a husky voice so sexy Jamison couldnât resist picking her up and spinning her around until she giggled.
âPut me down,â she said, kicking her dangling feet.
âOnly if youâll race me to the lifeguard stand,â he said, loving the feel of her arms wrapped tight around his neck.
âOkay, but you know youâll win.â
âWeâre both going to win,â Jamison said with a wink as he set her on her feet. âNo doubt in my mind.â
Maddie grinned as she set off across the sand with Jamison in hot pursuit.
CHAPTER SIX
MADDIE HAD NEVER kept a secret from her sister, not once in her entire nearly thirty years of life.
Maddie and Naomi had been tight since the day Maddie was born. Sheâd grown up idolizing Naomi. Maddie was Naomiâs number one fan long before Naomi was a famous celebrity chef with her own TV show and a mult
imillion dollar line of gourmet products. Maddie shared everything with her eldest sibling: hopes, dreams, heartachesâeven Naomiâs extensive shoe collection.
In other words, Maddie had no idea how she was going to keep her relationship with Jamison a secret from her sister, but she was determined to try. She didnât want to cross the Telling-Naomi bridge until she and Jamison were certain they were going to last longer than a few weeks.
Though if Maddie were honest, it was hard to imagine calling things off any time soon. Even if Jamison were to suddenly turn into an insufferable jerkâwhich she seriously doubted was going to happenâshe would stick around for several months for the sex alone.
The sex wasâ¦AH-MAY-ZING.
Maddie had had her share of lovers when she was studying in Paris, and been satisfied with the quality, if not the quantity, of her sex life with Serge, but nothing in her past had prepared her for the mind-and-body-blowing experience of being with Jamison. Their connection was so intense it allowed for nothing less than complete abandon.
Even stone-cold sober, in the harsh light of day, Maddie was incapable of giving less than everything when she was in bed with him. The moment Jamison pulled her into his arms, her inhibitions vanished. So far, theyâd had sex in the ocean, in a tent with people mere feet away, in a deserted life guard stand on a public beach, and in the closed bakery after Jamison caught a ride back to Summerville with Maddie and her friends after the singles retreat.
Maddie was secretly relieved that Jamison had asked for a ride, ensuring she wouldnât be pressured to spill all the intimate details of their steamy weekend. She loved Shelley, Dawn, and Piper, but she didnât want to share what sheâd experienced with Jamison with anyone but Jamison. When they were together, it was special. It would have felt like a betrayal to let anyone else into their private world, even people she cared about as much as her oldest friends.
The only person she would have even considered telling was Naomi, but her sister was absolutely off-limits, a fact Maddie repeated like a mantra as she opened Icing the day after her return from the retreat.