by Meg Brenner
“Principal Nelson,” I interrupted. I almost didn’t understand why I was about to do what I did, but I realized that sometimes things have to come from your heart, not your brain. “I would like to give up my title as valedictorian.” Brenda stared at me, her jaw open wide.
“But –“ Started Principal Nelson.
“I’m not going to college in the Fall. My grades have slipped. I’ve not been showing leadership this semester, I became pregnant, and I honestly don’t believe that I should be the face for this year’s grads.”
“Life happens, Jenna…” Principal Nelson looked shocked. “You can’t blame yourself. You’ve shown great dedication to your schoolwork since a young age –“
“I have…but so has Brenda. And, after careful thought and consideration, being valedictorian really isn’t as important as I thought it was going to be. There’s a lot of responsibility that I don’t know if I could handle right now. That’s why I think Brenda should do it.”
It was quiet in the office for what seemed like five minutes – though it was probably only about ten seconds. Finally, Brenda spoke up. “Are you sure? I’ve been nothing but mean to you this whole time.”
“That’s true,” I laughed. “But I could have conducted myself better too. Besides, this means more to you that it did me. And, well, no matter how mean you are…you’re still a person. You have feelings. And I’m sorry that I didn’t realize that until now.”
“Wow, Jenna,” Principal Nelson exclaimed. “Seems like you really matured this semester.”
“I’ve had to mature, Principal Nelson.” I smiled to myself at the thought of the semester. So much went wrong, but now so much was going right. I just had to believe that things would get better.
By the time the end of school came along, I could hardly wait to get home. I sat in Keiffer’s car, waiting for him to meet me so we could leave. However, he must have been taking his sweet time because by the time ten minutes passed, I was getting a bit annoyed.
“Hey, Jenna.” Lacey walked up to my car. She and I had hardly talked since I broke up with Brad a week ago. It was obvious that our friendship was based on popularity. It had once been an honest-to-God friendship, and then high school happened which made it change. Once Brad and I were over, we dropped each other faster than we could say “see ya.”
“Oh! Hey, Lacey!” I said happily. “Haven’t talked to you in a while. How have you been?”
“Good. For the most part.” She nervously fidgeted with her jeans. “So I guess we won’t be spending much time with each other now that you’re with Keiffer.”
I buried myself deeper into my seat. “I don’t have a problem hanging out with you. You’re still my best friend.”
“Oh,” she looked down at her shoes. “Well, I just wanted to know if I could…ya know…date Brad?”
“Excuse me?” I snapped. I had literally been broken up with him for a week and she was already macking on him. Uh, duh! Of course I had a problem with it. “What about Alex?”
“Well, he’s not exactly my type. I was kind of hoping this would happen. I’ve always really liked Brad…”
“Fine,” I turned my attention away from her. I was in love with Keiffer, but that didn’t change the fact that I didn’t want my best friend dating him.
“Thanks,” she smiled. “Because we already have a date set up.”
“You know what, Lacey?” I turned to her, feeling the anger run through my blood. “I think it’s best that we just don’t speak. Okay? Because what kind of a person does this to their best friend?”
“I just thought –“
“You just thought that because I broke up with him, you could weasel your way in. Well, you did. But you lost me as a friend.”
“I lost you as a friend months ago, Jenna.” Lacey said quietly. “And besides, we were only friends because we had the same popularity status. Now that I’m about to be Queen Bee... well, there’s nothing keeping us together.”
“Fine.”
“Fine,” she repeated. “I’ll see you around, I guess.” She walked away, and as she was, I made sure to look at her one last time. She and I had spent so many years together. She had known all my secrets. She had trusted me with hers. And in only thirty seconds we ended a friendship.
“Are you okay?” Keiffer asked once he got into the car. He started the ignition, but quickly looked over at me…he needed to evaluate my emotions first. “I saw Lacey talking to you. Did you guys get into a fight?”
“Yeah,” I said, adjusting my seatbelt. “She’s just a bitch.” He smiled but didn’t say anything. “What?” I asked. “Did I say something funny?”
“No,” he said. “I just remember how you used to be. Lacey used to be your clone, remember? She acts just like how you did.”
That thought hadn’t even come to mind. “Was I really that big of a bitch?” I asked. He nodded his head. “Well, I’m glad I grew out of that.”
We didn’t go straight home like we had planned. Instead, we headed off to the County Library to get some of our paper done. We decided to sit in a closed off room so no one could hear us as we talked. Besides, these papers were going to be personal. They would be about two strangers who met and fell in love. We wanted them to be as true and factual as possible. This was practically our bibliography that we would be giving our unborn children someday.
Keiffer had his feet up on the table and his iPod on. He wasn’t writing his paper, even though I had been slaving over mine for a few hours. Writing was easy for me. However, trying to write a three page paper on someone else is actually pretty hard. I felt myself grow annoyed as he sang to his music. I needed it quiet if I was ever going to get it done.
“Do you mind?” I asked after taking his ear buds out. “I’m doing my paper.”
“Fine, neighbor.” He kicked his feet off the table and took my notebook so he could see what I was writing. “What makes a perfect person? Is it charisma? Is it the way that they conduct themselves on a day to day basis? Or is it the way that a person takes life’s challenges and turns them in a life lesson?” He looked up at me, a smile upon his face.
“What? Too cheesy?” I asked.
“No, not nesseccarily. Just don’t forget you have to say this in front of the whole class.”
“Oh, I haven’t,” I laughed. “I’ve been reminded about that since the beginning of the semester. Do you know what’s funny? The first day I met you, I had told Lacey that I was going to make your life a living hell when I had to read my paper out loud. Boy, have things changed.”
“Yes…you were a mean girl,” he laughed. “I’m so glad my Jenna has changed.”
‘Your Jenna, huh?” I flirted.
“Yes,” he smiled before giving me a kiss. “And I hope it’ll always stay like that.”
“Me too,” I answered. “But for right now, we have a huge paper due in three days that I seriously need to get done. Why don’t you start on yours too?” I passed him a couple pages from my notebook.
“I’m doing a video.”
“Come’on, Keiffer. I thought you were joking about that. I actually thought you were being a jackass.” He always did that kind of stuff. He always had to do everything opposite than me. However, that’s what I loved about him. He was always surprising me in ways that Brad couldn’t.
“No, I want to do a video. It’ll be fun. Besides, I’m already done.”
“Didn’t you hear Mr. Thomas? He wants you to write a paper to go along with it.”
“Done,” he smiled. “Besides, we have better things to do.” He stood up from the table and walked over to the closed door. I shook my head quickly.
“No way, sir. I need to finish this. As much as I want to go make love with you – I need to do my school work,” I teased. After about a week of dating, we hadn’t even made love once. Before we could hardly keep our hands off each other. But now, after falling pregnant, we realized that our relationship was more than sex. It was actual love. We didn’t need sex to de
fine our relationship.
“I didn’t say we were leaving to have sex. It’s nearly eight. The sun is down…and…well, I’m hungry!” Now he was begging me. It was kind of funny to see him whipped.
“Fine, one more sentence,” I answered. Then, without warning, he grabbed my notebook and left the room. With a smile on my face, I ran after him, sliding my notebook out of his grasp. “Okay, guess we’ll do what you want to do.”
“Thank you,” he replied.
“Anytime, neighbor,” I laughed.
We decided to grab a quick bite for dinner. Nothing too fancy. It was nice to be able to just go out without having people stare at me. With Brad, teens would always stare at us. They’d know who we are and they’d come up for small talk. But with Keiffer, everything was much more low key. It wasn’t until after dinner did we have a chance to finally just get away from people. We walked hand-in-hand down the beach, the stars being our guide.
“Did you ever think that you were going to be with me tonight,” Keiffer laughed.
“No,” I admitted. “Life sure is funny like that.” I looked up at him, watching his blonde curls swirl in the night wind. “But I’m glad life’s like that. I mean, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I’m so completely happy, Keiffer.”
“I’m happy too.” He took a deep breath. “When I first saw you, I’ll admit that my heart fluttered a bit,” he laughed. “And when you answered that question about existentialism, I knew that I needed to get your attention. So I decided to argue, and now it looks like my evil plan worked.”
“That was pretty evil! I loathed you for it!” I said seriously.
“Yes, but now look where that’s gotten us.”
I touched my stomach. I was probably only about six weeks along so I didn’t have a baby bump or anything yet. However, it still felt so unreal. We had made an appointment for next Monday.
“Are you ready to be a dad?” I asked.
He didn’t answer for a while. I actually thought that maybe he hadn’t heard me, but before I could repeat my question, he finally spoke back up. “No, I’m actually not. This whole thing has scared me but I’m going to be the best dad that I can be.”
“I’m scared too,” I admitted. “But I’ll have you and that keeps me strong.”
“We’re in this together,” he smiled.
“Together,” I repeated.
After a while of walking, we decided to take a break. We sat up on a sandhill, secluded by a few trees. It was peaceful where we sat. I sat between his legs, resting the back of my head on his chest. We both stared out into the water, letting the crashing of the waves upon the shore fill our ears. He was perfect. Absolutely, without a doubt, perfect.
“We should come up with a name,” he suggested.
“We have almost eight more months,” I laughed. “Besides, we don’t even know if it’s a boy or a girl.”
“Well, we should always be prepared in case something happens to one of us. You know, in case one of us has to move or something.”
“What do you mean?” I questioned. Dread began to fill me. He couldn’t still be talking about suicide could he? I thought the medicine had cured him.
“I mean, before you leave for Yale.”
“Oh,” I sighed in relief. At least he wasn’t still thinking about suicide. “I’m not going.”
“What?” His reaction was something that I had expected. “But you have to go. You’re so smart. Honey, I’ll help out in anyway. I’ll get you a house, a car, whatever you need.”
“I just need you,” I said. “I just need you.”
“Honey,” he repeated.
“Keiffer, the moment I realized that I was pregnant, I realized that my dreams weren’t that important anymore. I can get a degree anywhere. Whether it’s here or in Florida. I just want to be with you.”
“But you need to go to college.”
“I will –“
“Yale,” he interrupted. “It’s been your dream.”
“But sometimes dreams change. And I’ve changed so much this semester.” I didn’t really want to talk about it. I made my decision way before I even told him. I understood how he felt. I knew that he wanted better for me. Hell, I wanted better for him. But, at that moment in my life, the only thing that mattered to me was Keiffer.
He sighed after a few moments of silence. “What do you think she’ll look like? I hope she has your brown eyes. They’re beautiful.”
I shook my head. “I hope she has your blue eyes. I could lose myself in them forever.” I ran my fingers through his blonde hair. “And I hope she has curls like you. Wait…how do you know that it’s a girl?” I laughed.
He shrugged his shoulders. “A daddy’s conscious, I suppose.”
“I suppose so. And when we graduate, we’ll get a house.” I loved imagining our lives together.
“With a pool,” added Keiffer.
“Yes. And we’ll celebrate Christmas downstairs by the fireplace –“
“That I would have already started before opening our presents,” he smiled. “And on weekends, we’ll take our daughter to the park.”
“And then out for ice cream,” I agreed. He squeezed me a little tighter, placing his hand on my stomach as we talked. Time stood still as we sat there on the dune that night. Nothing else mattered. We were there, alone…alone with our dreams and our futures. Nothing, not even college, could ruin what he had at that moment.
“Have you ever thought about us?” He whispered into my ear. Chills ran down my back as I felt his hot breath against my neck.
“Of course. I think about us all the time,” I responded.
“No, like us. Have you ever imagined yourself being my wife in the future?” Keiffer asked me as though I was about to run away. But that was the last thing from my mind. I knew he felt uncomfortable talking about this because I had just been given a ring by Brad. But, with Keiffer, it was different. Everything was different. I loved him more than life itself.
“I would be your wife in a heartbeat,” I smiled.
“Then do it!” He said excitedly. I could feel his heart beat fast. I sat up also, looking him directly in the eyes. As soon as I didn’t respond, he started to explain himself. “Jenna, marry me! We’re having a baby…getting married is the next step.”
“I don’t know…” I couldn’t believe that he was asking me this. Having a baby with him was one thing, but actually tying the knot? Marriage made me sick. After watching what happened between my parents, I honestly didn’t think that any marriage would work.
“What don’t you know? I love you. You love me. We’re having a baby. There’s not much to think about.” He embraced my face between his hands. He put his lips close to mine, feeling him breathe against me. “You’re the best thing to ever happen to me.”
“You are too,” I smiled. “But we’re both seventeen. We have to be at least eighteen –“
“Not unless our parents allow us to get married before we’re eighteen. I know my mom’s cool with it. And your dad? Well, your dad’s taking this whole pregnancy okay. You’re mom may be a bit of a challenge, but we can do it. Jenna, please marry me. I want to wake up to you every morning. I want to take care of you when you’re sick. And I want to support you through everything that you do in life.”
Looking into his eyes made my heart start to melt. Just seconds ago we were talking about how wonderful our future was going to be. He loved me. I saw it in his eyes as he embraced my face. He knew me better than I knew myself. How could I not marry this man? He made me happy…all the time.
“I’ll marry you, Keiffer!” I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled me into a hug. We sat like that for a while. I took in his cologne, and he nestled his face deeper into my hair. “I want to grow old with you…” I whispered into his ear. He didn’t respond, but I knew he heard me.
Chapter Fifteen
The next day at school, it was like everyone knew about our sudden engagement. Yes, I’d told my dad, but it wasn’t l
ike I told anyone else from school. But, as we walked hand-in-hand down the hallway, I didn’t really mind the whispers about us. I was getting pretty used to it. No one was particularly happy when I was with Brad, yet, they all hated the fact that I was with Keiffer…and I didn’t care.
It wasn’t until we were in the gymnasium after school did someone finally approach me about it. He sat up in the stands as I led the Cheer Squad in another practice. This was the last one until graduation, which was just in a week. I was a little nervous because we had been working on this routine for like months. But just knowing that Keiffer was there made me feel more confident.
“Why do we have to do this?” One of the girls whined. They were all sitting on the ground doing stretches. All twelve pairs of eyes looked up at me…they obviously all had the same question.
“Well, if we didn’t stretch then you’d pull something –“
“No,” the girl interrupted. “I mean, why do we have to continue practice when you’ve done nothing but sit on your ass this whole semester?”
“Excuse me?” I said, shocked that she would say something like that to me.
“Well, really…you’ve just been bossing us around. You got kicked off the squad, came back, got preggo, and now you’re still bossing us around as though you’re better than us. Obviously, by the looks of things, your ass should’a stayed off the damn team.”
“Yeah, Jenna,” another girl piped up. “You’re not exactly a leader, are you?”
“A leader wouldn’t dump the hottest guy in school and then fuck around with some weirdo surfer wannabe…” Another one said. Pretty soon the whole squad was yelling out insults at me. From up in the stands, Keiffer couldn’t hear anything that was going on. Yet, I wished that he would come down and punch each one of these girls in their pretty little faces.
“And you all think that you’re leaders?” I spun around, coming face-to-face with Brenda. She walked up to me, placing her hands on her hips. “What makes you guys so perfect?” She asked the squad. “LaQuisha, last I knew you had been dating a thirty year old married man.” The squad looked at her and she hid her face suddenly. “And Molly…you think your abortion went unnoticed. Well, it didn’t. Maybe you should talk on your phone outside of school. Your mouse voice travels empty halls quite well.”
