by L. E. Wilson
“You shouldn’t be here,” she told him. “If the others caught you—”
“They won’t.”
“Your scent is everywhere. They will know you were here. Luukas will recognize it.”
He gave a small shrug, completely unconcerned. “Possibly.”
“What am I supposed to tell him?”
“Whatever you’d like.”
Why was he making this so hard for her? Shea closed her eyes. “Jesse, please. Just go.” I couldn’t stand it if anything happened to you.
He was silent for a long time, then suddenly his mouth quirked up in a semblance of a smile. “Worried about me, Shea?”
She shook her head. Yes. “No. I’m worried about me when they find out I allowed you into my apartment.” The lie was bitter on her tongue. She was terrified for him. Luukas was healing from his ordeal well with Keira’s help, though lately he seemed to be backsliding. But he would rip Jesse apart if he found out he was here, and he had five witches and four other vampires to help him.
The fact that she didn’t include herself in that group didn’t escape her, but it wasn’t something she was willing to examine too closely at the moment.
Tipping the bottle up to his mouth, Jesse never took his eyes from hers as he drank, his Adam’s apple sliding up and down with each big swallow. When he had quenched his thirst, he set it on the counter and leaned back in his stool. “I came to invite you on an adventure.”
She crossed her arms over her chest again when his golden stare fell and lingered. Shea didn’t want to feed into the idea of going anywhere with him, but to distract him—and herself—from the way he stared at her breasts, she asked, “An adventure?”
“Yes.”
“Why in the world would you think that I would want to go anywhere with you?” It was a reasonable question. But the answer, when it came, completely floored her.
“I think you know.”
“No, I don’t.”
“Shall I spell it out, then?”
“Please.”
“Fine.” He leaned forward in his chair, pinning her to the spot with the heat glowing from his eyes. And though he never raised his voice, each word cut into her like a knife, whittling away her defenses until there was nothing left but a wall as thin as paper between them. “Because I sensed you in that altar room before I even knew you were there. Because ever since I first laid eyes on you, I’ve needed you near me. Because I long to touch your skin and hear your voice—all the time. Because I crave the feel of your hands on me with everything inside me. Because I nearly come when I imagine you feeding from me—and I imagine that quite often.” He paused. “Because I’ve never felt such a loss as the day you walked away from me.”
The paper ripped, leaving a jagged hole. “Stop.” She threw up her hands, halting any more words he’d been about to say.
“Why?”
“Because you’re talking crazy.” But the thing was, he wasn’t. Everything he said…she had felt those things, too.
“Is it crazy, Shea?”
His chest rose and fell rapidly beneath his sweater, the show of emotion unusual for him. Shea had never heard so much as a flutter of his pulse to give away what he was feeling before. But she heard it now. Loud and clear.
“I’ve missed you,” he told her simply.
The world tilted around her again. The way he looked at her, the longing in his voice, the scent of his desire for her, his words…but she couldn’t be with him. “Jesse, no—”
“Come with me, Shea. Be with me. Even if just for a little while.”
Despite the slight thread of fear that still tangled its way around her gut, the urge to touch him was so strong she took a step forward and started to reach across the island before she caught herself. Curling her hands into fists at her sides, she shook her head. “I can’t. We can’t.”
“Why not?”
She laughed, the sound ugly and raw in her own ears. “Why not?” She practically spat the words at him. “Because you kept me a prisoner for weeks. Because you tried to kill Luukas! Right after you drove him so completely mad, he believed he had killed Keira—his mate! And you did it with nothing but the power of your sick mind. Because you helped that she-bitch unleash the hounds from hell, and you don’t seem to have the slightest remorse about any of it!”
He was irritatingly calm after her outburst. “You know nothing of my remorse, or lack thereof. I have my own reasons for everything I do, Shea.”
She crossed her arms and leaned back against the counter. “Oh, yeah? What would those reasons be? What possible excuse could you have for any of those things?”
His eyes darkened, narrowed in challenge. “Yes, I kept you prisoner in my room. To protect you. It was the only way I could be assured that Leeha wouldn’t get her hands on you. The spell that kept you a prisoner in my room kept her out. Although she couldn’t possess you without me, she was spiteful and temperamental, and not ever to be trusted. And yes, I fought with Luukas. Fought with him. I was ordered to kill him, and his witch. Did you know that? But I didn’t.” Jesse took another drink from his water. Staring at the counter in front of him, he said quietly, “I only had to make it look good, before I allowed them to escape.” He sighed heavily, like the weight of the world was on his shoulders, and finished off the bottle.
Shea continued to give him the same stony stare, but she wasn’t feeling quite so self-righteous anymore. “Okay, fine. But what about the rest of it? That doesn’t excuse the fact that you played a very large part in Leeha’s insane plan to populate the earth with actual demons from hell.”
“I have my reasons for that, also.”
She waited, honestly curious as to what possible reason he could have for doing such a horrendous thing.
Getting up from the counter, he began to pace. “It’s a long story. Too long to get into right now.”
“I have the time.” She wasn’t very successful at hiding the snide tone of her voice, but she wasn’t about to let him get out of this one without hearing his reasoning behind it.
Jesse suddenly veered from his path and came to stand before her, so close she could feel the heat from his body. His heart pounded in her ears. “Come with me, and I will tell you all of it.”
A deal. He was offering her a deal. The scent of his skin—and his blood—engulfed her, making her muscles tense, her fangs ache, and her throat burn. More than that, she could feel the power of his will and the answer he wanted to hear from her. His golden gaze bore into hers. Shea did everything she could to keep him out of her mind, to no avail. Her head began to pound from fighting him. Sliding out from between him and the counter, she paced over to the floor-to-ceiling window that made up her outer living room wall, breaking the connection. Turning her back to the view, she shook her head. “No, Jesse. I can’t.”
He took a deep breath, running a hand through his dark hair much like Nikulas did when he was feeling anxious. Then he stilled. His eyes narrowed in challenge. “Not even if it meant you would be helping me hunt down the demon’s blood before they could find it themselves?”
Shea eyed him with suspicion. “What did you just say?”
He sauntered toward her, all lean muscle and masculine confidence beneath his expensive clothes. Stopping just out of reach, he said, “We can stop the demons, Shea. You and me. We could bring the blood back to Luukas and let him do with it what he will.”
She searched his features, wanting to trust what he was saying, but knowing she’d be an absolute idiot to do so. “Why would you do that? I thought you wanted them here. Why would you help me after everything you’ve done to achieve that?”
“Because more than anything else, I want to be with you.”
Shea froze, his frank admission throwing her off again. He was telling the truth this time, she had no doubt. For a brief moment, the butterflies returned as she stared up at his handsome face, and she dared to hope.
But then reality came crashing down upon her, and she gave him a sad sm
ile. Her heart deflated in her chest; aching for a future with this dangerous male she hadn’t admitted to herself that she wanted, until this very moment when she realized she could never, ever, have it. “That’s impossible, Jesse. We can’t be together.”
“We can, Shea. Leeha is dead. And I can”—he rolled his eyes on a loud, suffering sigh—“come to a mutual understanding with Luukas. We’ll work it all out.”
“No.” She shook her head. “We can’t.”
He raised a hand to touch her face. “Shea—”
She stepped back. “No! Don’t touch me. You can’t touch me, Jesse.”
Chapter 5
Jesse dropped his hand, but didn’t back away. He cocked his head to the side so he could see the reflection of the overhead light on her face. Shea’s pulse was beating rapidly and her forehead had a sheen of sweat covering it. He finally understood why she was so frightened of him. But he would never do anything to physically harm her. “I swear to you, I would not touch you unless you wanted me to.”
But she just gave him a sad, nervous smile. “No. You don’t understand. You can’t touch me. Not ever. You would hurt me, Jesse.”
He recoiled from her words. “Shea, I would never harm you.”
“Yes, you would. It would be unintentional, but it would happen.” She took a deep breath, hugging herself, like she was trying to make herself smaller. “Something happened to me when Luukas disappeared. I didn’t know it until the day Nik told us his brother was missing. He was so upset, and as I was about to leave, I reached out to hug him. As soon as I touched him, something…happened. I nearly ended up on the floor.”
“What exactly are you saying?”
She paused a moment. “I’m saying I can’t touch you. I literally can’t. And you can’t touch me. If I even so much as brush up against a male, I feel like”—she glanced around, like the words she was looking for were written on the walls—“I’m being electrocuted or something.”
Jesse studied her, taking in every small movement of her eyes. Every breath. She wasn’t lying. It suddenly all began clicking into place. He’d heard her hiss in pain when the others had brought her into the altar room that first time. Although he hadn’t realized what the sound was at first, it had traveled up the corridor to him, distressing him and hurrying his steps. And the way she’d recoiled from him in his room when he’d only been trying to console her. And the way she’d tried to avoid the dancers at the club, hissing in pain when they accidentally bumped into her. His earlier pondering had been correct.
It was Keira’s curse. Leeha had bragged about it to him in one of her more talkative moments. “But, how do you feed?”
“Females don’t affect me, only males. I can…touch females.” She wouldn’t look at him.
Jesse studied her guilty expression. “You do other things with the women as well, other than feed. Sexual things.” It wasn’t a question, or an accusation. Just an observation. His blood heated at the thought of her with another woman, but not in the way he would expect. The thought of her with someone else, anyone else, had him grinding his teeth together and clenching his fists at his sides. He’d never felt such possessiveness with anyone else. Yet, in the weeks he’d had her in his home, he’d come to think of this female as his own.
She lifted her chin and straightened her spine. “Sometimes.” The word was said defiantly, despite the spots of color decorating her cheeks. Her discomfort with the conversation told him all he needed to know, even if he hadn’t just plucked it from her mind.
“Have you been with anyone since you left me?” He didn’t know why he asked. He really didn’t want to know.
She stared at him a moment. “Not like that. No.”
Jesse swallowed his ire. He knew what it was like to feel alone. He’d spent most of his life that way. “That’s not something to be ashamed of, Shea. Everyone needs to be touched, to be held and loved. It’s human nature, and vampire also, I would imagine. It doesn’t matter what gender you are with.” However, he intended to see to it that she would be touching no one else from this moment forward.
Shea crossed her arms and tilted her head in a way that he was coming to recognize as her telltale defensive gesture. “Yeah, well. Tell that to my father. He’s probably rolling over in his grave as we speak.”
“Your father was old-fashioned, then.”
The snorting sound she made was definitely not ladylike. “You have no idea.”
“And yet, he has such a heathen for a daughter.”
An adorable crease appeared between her brows as she scowled, until she realized he was teasing her. The lines relaxed, to be replaced by a forlorn expression. “He actually never knew of the thing I became.”
Jesse approached her slowly. Distracted by her memories, she held her ground this time, and warmth filled him that she trusted him to get so close, whether she realized it or not. Very carefully, he picked up a tendril of her dark hair from where it lay over the front of her shoulder. It was just as fine and silky as he’d always imagined. No wonder his raven was so enthralled with it. Catching and holding her gaze, he lifted the strand to his nose. “You are not a ‘thing’, Shea. I don’t ever want to hear you calling yourself that.” Her hair smelled wonderful. “What is that smell?”
“Pantene.” The sarcasm was back. Turning her head so her hair slipped out of his fingers, she put distance between them, taking on a casual mien as she walked past him to stand by the cold fireplace.
But she didn’t fool him. He could hear her heart pounding and see the flush of her skin. And he could sense the battle she was fighting with herself in her mind. She was not as unaffected by his nearness as she tried to appear. “Come with me, Shea.”
She shook her head, but when she looked at him, her green eyes were bright with longing and unshed tears. “Why? It would only be torture for us both.”
Her words gave him hope. “To be so close and yet so far away?”
“Yes.” The word tore from her on a hiss.
Ah. Finally. Some honesty. “I have quite a few tricks up my sleeve, Shea. Perhaps I could figure out a way to alleviate your pain.”
Hope flashed across her lovely features, but it was gone before he could appreciate it, to be replaced by a cynical smile. “And what if you can’t?”
“I still want to spend time with you,” he told her sincerely.
Throwing her arms out to the side, she looked to the heavens. “Why? Why the hell would you want to be with a female you couldn’t touch?”
“Because I care for you.”
“You barely know me.”
“Then give me the chance to do so.”
“Jesse—”
He stormed over to her, stopping close enough that her spine stiffened, and she looked up at him with a hiss of warning and a flash of her fangs. Gods, she was beautiful when she was vamped out. It made him instantly hard. “Give me a few days of your time, Shea. That’s all I ask. Give me a damn chance to try to help you.”
Indecision battled in her thoughts.
He pressed his advantage. “Come with me. Let’s save the world. Together. And maybe we can save you in the process.” He waited with bated breath as she fought with her decision. Gently, Jesse pressed harder into her mind, amazed at the speed of her vampire brain as she thought of and discarded every side to her arguments.
Finally, she relaxed. Her decision had been made.
“Okay.”
Backing off slightly, he smiled. “Okay.” Her decision, he knew, had little to do with him, and a lot to do with helping Luukas and the other Hunters. At least, that’s what she chose to believe.
She rubbed her forehead with the fingers of one hand, as though her head hurt. “I just need to pack a bag.”
He glanced out the window. If they hurried, they would have just enough time to make it back to his home for the day. “I’ll wait.” There was no way in hell he was letting her out of his sight until he had her safely away from here.
Then, and only then,
would he tell her the truth.
Chapter 6
Shea finished packing a small duffle with a few changes of clothes and other necessities. She’d changed back into a pair of jeans along with a black, long-sleeved, cotton shirt. Her boots and rain-resistant pullover would complete the ensemble. Picking up the bag, she glanced around her room to make sure she hadn’t forgotten anything.
What the hell am I doing?
She’d gone round and round with that question ever since she’d agreed to this insane trip. And it all kept coming back to one thing:
What if he can help me?
But even if he couldn’t, there was an even better reason to do this.
What if we can find the blood before the demons do?
Those three thoughts had been fighting for dominance ever since she’d agreed to go with the dark warlock. She was taking a huge chance, but she couldn’t deny she felt something for him, something so strong she was willing to put her life in his hands. Something that made her willing to disobey Luukas, her maker. And, maybe, just maybe, if they were successful in their endeavor, the Master Vampire wouldn’t lop off Jesse’s head when they returned.
Or hers.
She wasn’t fooled by what Jesse had told her. He wouldn’t give up what he’d been working toward that easily, just to be alone with her. He had no intention of helping her stop the demons. However, if she went with him, maybe she could put a wrench in his plans. Perhaps she could even talk him over to their side.
Hopefully, Luukas wouldn’t find out what she was up to and call her back before she could accomplish what she was setting out to do. If he did, she would have to obey. It was the nature of the relationship between a Master Vampire and his children, though Luukas rarely implemented it. Now she just had to think up something to tell the rest of the Hunters: a good reason for her to be going off on her own without telling them about Jesse.
“Tell them you need some time away.” Jesse’s voice came from behind her. “Tell them that watching all of them running around with their mates is upsetting to you as the only one still alone, and how you probably will never find someone of your own…etc. etc. Act the part of the emotional female and those boys will be more than happy to give you a little space.”
