by L. A. Casey
That felt better.
“Well, well, well. If it isn’t me forever disappearin’ ex-girlfriend.”
I cringed when I heard his voice, but plastered on a smile as I slowly turned myself around. “Heeeeey, you. What’s up, homie?” I asked Skull as he stood before me with his large arms fold across his chest, and a grin stretched across his mouth.
He laughed, “What’s up, homie? Really? Where the hell have you been? I’ve been tryin’ to get in touch with you for ages. Did you change your number?”
I instantly felt shitty for not calling him for a chat like I usually would. I was a bad friend.
“No, I’ve just been busy.”
Skull playfully winked. “I thought you might’ve been avoidin’ me.”
I frowned. “Avoidin’ you? What for?”
“The last time we were together we decided that we were done for real, so I figured you wanted me out of your life when I couldn’t get in touch with you.”
My face fell. “That’s the furthest thing from the truth, Trevor. I love you, you know I do.”
I never used Skull’s real name unless I was serious, and I was being deadly serious right now. I wanted him to know I would never try to cut him out of my life. Ever. He was a huge part of my life.
Skull’s face softened. “I love you, too.”
I smiled and relaxed my features. “What are you doin’ here?”
“I work weekends so my drinkin’ nights are weekdays. I’m here with some lads from the club.”
I bobbed my head but said nothing.
“Are you okay?”
I snorted, “Depends on what you mean by okay.”
Skull stared at me, hard, as he waited for me to explain.
I sighed, “I’m fine. Things are just a mental for me right now.”
“Let’s go back inside, and I’ll buy you a drink. We can talk about it.”
“I would, but I can’t drink.”
“Why not?” Skull asked, perplexed.
I didn’t know how to tell my ex-boyfriend, who at one point was my world, that I was pregnant with another man’s child. So I decided to make a joke out of it. I placed my hand on my stomach, rubbed it around in circles and smiled wide.
Skull looked down my hands and then back up to my face. “Why are you smilin’ and touchin’ your stomach like that? You hungry? Wanna get some food?”
I burst into laughter. “Not hungry. I’ve a human being to think about in there now so no more drinkin’. Not for another few months anyway.”
Skull chuckled but stopped when I made no motion of telling him I was joking. He stared into my eyes and when he saw no traces of a lie he gasped, “I don’t believe you!”
I shrugged. “It’s true.”
“Shut the fuck up!”
I again burst into laughter, “Now that’s just rude.”
“You’re pregnant?” Skull asked, his eye bugging out his head. “For real?”
Could he not see my big belly?
I nodded my head. “Yep.”
“For who?” he asked worriedly.
I chuckled, “It’s not you, don’t worry.”
Skull relaxed. “Sorry, it’s not that I don’t want kids, I do, but you know. Wow.”
I giggled. “I understand. I was pretty shocked when I first found out, too.”
“I can’t believe it,” Skull said dumbfounded. “You’re really havin’ a kid?”
“I am.” I beamed.
“Fuckin’ hell. Me little baby is havin’ a baby,” he laughed. “Congratulations, sweetheart!”
I squealed when Skull stepped forward, wrapped his arms around me and lifted me up off the ground. I latched my hands onto his shoulders, closed my eyes and laughed.
“When are you havin’ the brat?” Skull asked when he set me back on the ground a few seconds later.
I held onto him because I didn’t fully feel steady on my feet.
“January,” I said, smiling up at him. “I’m due on me ma’s birthday.”
“No!” Skull gasped and beamed. “That’s incredible.”
He gave me a big kiss on the cheek that made me laugh. I was about to step back away from him now that I had my bearings, but I remained put when I heard the commotion from my right.
“Kane. No!” I heard Nico’s voice bellow.
Kane?
I looked at my right and widened my eyes when I spotted him storming towards myself and Skull, his face was twisted in rage, and I had no clue why. All I knew was he was pissed, and his focus was completely on Skull.
Fuck.
Time slowed down then as I stepped backwards just as Kane collided into Skull, taking him up off his feet and spearing him to the ground. The noise of Skull hitting the ground struck me like a physical slap, and I heard my ear-piercing scream before I realised the sound even left my mouth.
“Stop!”
I stupidly rushed forward to try and stop Kane from hurting Skull, but Nico was on me in a second. “I don’t fucking think so!” he snapped at me. “You’re pregnant, stay back!”
I blinked my eyes and nodded at him.
He was right, and I hated that it took another person to remind me not to rush into a fight. I should have already known that—I was the one who was pregnant after all.
“Eejit,” I hissed at myself.
I lifted my hands to my face and covered my ears with my palms to block out the sounds of all the chaos around me. I could hear Skull trying to get through to Kane, as well as Nico. I widened my eyes when Nico jumped on Kane’s back and wrapped his arm around his neck. For a few seconds nothing happened. Kane continued to hit Skull, but then ever so slightly his movements slowed and I realised why.
Nico was suffocating him.
“Stop!” I screamed. “You’ll kill him.”
Kane rolled off Skull with Nico still attached to his back like a monkey, and it was only when his eyes closed that Nico released him and pushed himself up off the ground. Kane wheezed a little as he caught his breath back and blinked his eyes open. He stared up at the night sky and laughed like a crazy person.
I stared at Kane then Nico.
“You fuckin’ eejit!” I shouted and stalked forward, shoving Nico in the chest. “Don’t ever do that to him again. You were suffocatin’ him!”
Nico grunted as he slightly stumbled. “It’s the only way I can get him to stop when he starts.”
“Starts what?” I asked.
He looked me in the eye. “When he starts fighting... he blacks out and doesn’t stop until he is forced to.”
Like when he was fighting James a couple of months ago.
I swallowed and looked away. “Bring him home. I have to make sure me friend is okay.”
“He had a few drinks more drinks when you went to the bathroom. Your brothers challenged him to a shot contest. He is drunk and saw Skull kiss you on the cheek, he got the wrong idea,” Nico said when he grabbed my arm to keep me put in front of him.
“Why’re you tellin’ me this?” I asked.
Nico shrugged. “So you go easy on him when he is sober.”
“Fat chance of that,” I replied.
Nico smiled. “Come with me, I’ll bring you home.”
I looked over my shoulder for Skull, but he was gone, and the crowd that gathered outside the pub was already breaking up.
I sighed, “Comin’ here was a stupid idea.”
“Tell me about it.”
“I have to tell everyone goodbye-”
“I’ll text Bronagh to make something up. She’ll say goodbye for you and Kane.”
I sighed but nodded my head.
He turned away from me and helped his stupid older brother up to his feet then slung an arm around his waist as he guided Kane to their parked Jeep in the car park. I silently followed behind them.
Nico settled Kane in the back of the Jeep, buckled his seatbelt and muttered curse words when Kane fell to the left and instantly began snoring. “Heavy bastard,” he grunted.
&n
bsp; I smiled to myself as I rounded on the passenger side of the car and climbed into the front seat, buckling myself up. When Nico was settled in the driver’s seat, he started the fifteen-minute journey to get us home. For the first few minutes, we were silent until Nico began to talk.
“He likes you. You know that right?”
I didn’t reply because I didn’t know what to say.
“He does. He just has a funny way of showing it, but he likes you.”
My heart thudded lightly against my chest.
“He can’t stand me, Nico.”
Nico laughed, “Get real, Aideen. He only argues with you because he doesn’t know how else to approach you.”
That was stupid.
“So he’s just a dick to me because he likes me? That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”
“I never said he was smart.”
I grinned a little at that then frowned when Kane snored behind us.
“I... I don’t know if I can spend time with someone like him. His temper... it scares me. I like him too, but I don’t know if it’s enough.”
“He would never hurt you,” Nico assured me.
I nodded my head. “I believe that, but his ability to hurt other people frightens me just as much.”
Nico set his jaw. “It’s not his fault that he’s the way he is.”
I blinked. “Whose fault is it then?”
His hands tightened on the steering wheel of the car. “People from our past.”
“Ah,” I said and snapped my fingers. “Marco? He made you a fighter and Alec an escort, right?”
Nico mutely nodded his head.
“What were Ryder and Kane’s jobs for him?”
He glanced at me. “You don’t know?”
I huffed, “No. The girls are all about ‘respectin’ their men’s privacy’ or some bullshit like that.”
Nico laughed, “I bet that kills you.”
“You could say that,” I admitted.
With a smile he said, “You aren’t missing a lot by being in the dark, trust me, Ado. Being in the dark when it comes to my family is a kindness.”
I groaned, “Not when I’m havin’ a baby with a man who is lost in that darkness.”
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Ado. Kane is my brother, but even I don’t fully understand or know the things he was put through. He doesn’t talk about it. Ever.”
I began to feel sick.
“You mean the cause of his scars?” I asked, my voice low.
Nico nodded and kept his eyes on the road. “He doesn’t talk about how he got them, and we don’t push him on it.”
I leaned back. “Why not? If you understood what he went through, you could help him now.”
“He is fine,” he assured me. “He rarely gets into fights... it’s only since... well, since-”
“Since I got pregnant?”
Nico glanced at me then back to the road as he bobbed his head up and down.
“I know you’re adjusting to your life suddenly changing, Ado, but you have no idea how huge this is for Kane.”
I remained silent as Nico gave me more insight into Kane.
“He has a low tolerance for people. He accepted Bronagh, Branna, Keela and even Alannah because my brothers and me love them, and luckily he grew to love them too. He is a funny and kind person... but he is fucked up, Aideen. I’m not going to sugar coat it—things won’t be easy with him. But just... just remember how difficult this is for him.”
I lifted my hands to my face and rubbed. “I need to know what made him the way he is. It’s not right that he blacks out when he fights—it’s dangerous as hell. He is like a machine.”
Nico was quiet for a few minutes until he said, “Ask him why. Just pick the right moment.”
Until we fully trusted one another to open up and really talk, I just wasn’t sure if the ‘right moment’ would ever happen. Kane had a lot of layers to him, I didn’t know if he would ever let me get to his centre.
“I can’t believe you paid people to move everythin’ into me new apartment for me. Me old apartment is empty, I just have me bed, a few clothes and that’s it.”
I was currently sat on my bed looking around my bare bedroom. I would be moving out of it for good tomorrow, and I wasn’t even sad about it. I was ready to be moving on to a new chapter in my life.
Keela snorted through the receiver of my phone. “It was all Alec’s idea, but yeah, I was totally on board with it because there was no way in hell we were havin’ a repeat of movin’ day. No, thank you.”
I shivered. “Amen, sister.”
Keela was a little quiet before she said, “Did you ring your landlord yet?”
I nodded my head even though she couldn’t see me. “Yeah, I rang him this mornin’. He knows I’m leavin’ here tomorrow. He was a little surprised I wouldn’t be renewin’ me lease, but he was fine with lettin’ me out of my current lease two months early if he could keep me deposit I paid him when I first moved in.”
“I’m glad that’s sorted for you. I’m even happier you’ll be livin’ in Upton. Two minutes away, too!”
I squealed in delight. “I know! I can’t believe me apartment. It’s stunnin’.”
“I can’t wait for a sleepover.”
I laughed, “Neither can Kane from the way he carries on.”
Keela murmured, “Nico told us what happened with him last night. Are you mad at him?”
Was I?
I exhaled. “Yes and no. I’m mad he hurt Skull—who I still have to call, by the way—and how he behaved, but I understand that he got the wrong end of the stick. He thought Skull kissed me.”
“Well, he does have a right to be angry if he thought it was a real kiss.”
“What?” I gasped. “You know we aren’t together.”
“Officially yes,” Keela replied. “But you have both been actin’ like a couple for weeks now—you just don’t kiss and have sex.”
“I don’t think-”
“I think just get with him already. You’re torturin’ the poor lad,” Keela griped as she cut me off.
“Keela!” I snapped. “You’re supposed to be on my side.”
“I told you I’m on the side of love.”
I groaned, “What does that even mean?”
“It means,” she guffawed, “that you two clearly like each other but are either too stupid to realise it or too stubborn to admit it. It’s one or the other.”
I growled, “Are you callin’ me stupid?”
“Yes!” Keela cackled.
I seethed in silence until she stopped laughing at me.
“I’m sorry,” she said through her muffled laughter. “I just love that you’re in this position.”
“Why?” I asked, appalled.
“Because,” she sassed, “being with Kane is what you want deep down, and how he acts around you is forcin’ it out of you and you hate it. It’s interestin’ to watch it unfold.”
“You’re un-fuckin’-believable.”
“I know.”
I pressed my free hand to my face. “I’d smack you if I could.”
Keela snickered, “I don’t doubt it.”
I thought about what she said for a couple of seconds and frowned. “I’m not goin’ to lie, I do like him. I like him so much, but say we get together... what if we fuck things up? I can’t risk it with the baby comin’.”
“That’s a big ‘what if’, babe.”
“You’re not helpin’ me see sense here,” I whined.
“I am,” Keela countered, “you’re just tryin’ to convince yourself what I’m sayin’ is bullshit. You know it’s not. I wouldn’t suggest givin’ things a go with Kane if I didn’t think you’d both be great together.”
I knew what she was saying was true. Keela always had my back.
“I guess so.”
“Does that mean you’ll give you and Kane a chance?”
I thought hard about it.
I knew I liked Kane. He gave m
e butterflies by just looking at me, and he made me so happy. We still argued, but we were so close now that not being with him would eventually become a problem. My feelings for him were developing fast, and the longer I didn’t give into him, the harder I was making things for myself.
I grunted to Keela, “I suppose.”
“Good, because he left to go over to talk to you ten minutes ago.”
“You fuckin’ bitch!”
I heard Keela’s laughter just before she hung up.
Evil.
She was pure evil.
I shook my head and threw my phone onto my bed. I laid back and sighed as I looked up at the ceiling. I couldn’t get comfortable, the person who rang my doorbell made sure of that.
Kane.
I sat upright, got up from my bed, and walked out of my bedroom and down the hallway to the door. I opened my door without looking through the peephole because I knew who it would be.
He walked into my apartment and closed the door behind him. I turned and walked over to my kitchen table. I rooted for the tube of lipgloss Keela left in my bag, and for my tube of super glue.
“What are you doing?”
“Adding glue to Keela's lip gloss.”
Let's see her trick me again.
Kane stared at me for a moment then asked, “Why?”"
“Have your ever head the term 'some people need glue stick instead of chapstick'?”
Kane nodded. “Sure.”
“Well, that term applies here. If Keela won't shut her mouth, I'll shut it for her.”
Kane blinked. "You can be quite scary sometimes, you know?”
“Even the nicest people have limits, Kane.”
He swallowed. "Noted.”
I sighed.
“What are you doin’ here?” I asked Kane as I put both tubes back into my bag and turned to face him.
“I needed to see you.”
I folded my arms across my chest. “Why?”
Kane stuffed his hands into his jean pockets. “I’ve to get my insulin shot... and I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry.”
I ignored his diabetes for a minute.
I raised my eyebrow. “Are you really sorry?”
He set his jaw. “Why did you let him kiss you?”
That was a no then.
“He kissed me cheek because he is a friend who was congratulatin’ me on me pregnancy.”
