by Lee, M. A.
“Yeah. I guess today I got a little emotional thinking about everything that has happened between us,” I added.
Ryder sat back, his smile fading. Realizing he probably thought I was going to offer to stop dating, I rushed right into what I was going to say. “I think you don’t understand. Melanie had her heartbroken years ago, but she overcame her tragedy. When I think about us-- you and me, it makes me so nervous. What I feel for you is strong and intense and honestly, it scares the hell out of me. But, I know that’s a good thing. It means I’m alive and finally living my life again. Wade’s death broke me, but I know that Wade would never want me to be sad and alone. I’m sure if I could see him now, he would be fussing at me for being so dramatic,” I said, laughing a little. “Part of what scares me about you is your job. You put yourself at risk every single day and the thought of losing you…” I trail off.
Ryder remained silent as I took a second to get myself in check.
“As much as I tried to fight my feelings for you, I just can’t. I just want you to know that I am willing to see where this relationship goes, but please, don’t break my heart.”
Ryder is silent and I swear I think we can both hear the rapid beating of my heart as I wait for him to do or say anything. Suddenly, he stands and crosses the room. I’m taken aback at first, but when he lends down and places my hand in his, I feel my body begin to react.
His lips press against mine and my breath is momentarily taken away. Closing my eyes, I take in this moment as Ryder slips his tongue inside my mouth. Our kiss is like a rhythmic dance and I love the way our bodies are moving in sync.
When we break, I am panting as his eyes bore deep into mine.
“Meghan, I won’t break your heart,” he says, lifting me up in his strong arms.
I wrap my legs around his waist and crash my lips back to his again. At this moment, I can feel all of the desire swirling between the both of us. Maybe this is too fast, but I don’t care. I need this man inside of me. I need his body on mine and I need to feel his heart against my skin.
I want him to stay with me tonight, but at the same time, I know that would be asking a lot right now. We began to move and I pointed toward my bedroom as I held onto him.
His kiss never wavered as we stumbled down to the hall to my room. He kissed me with a hunger so intense, I let out a small moan. The smell of his sweet and musky scent made my head swim.
Crashing down on my bed, my hands quickly began loosening the button on his jeans as I struggled to kick his pants down to his knees. His hands roamed from my neck and then gently tugged my shirt as he quickly lifted it over my head before making his way down to my white lace bra. Taking a moment, Ryder released his grip from my lips and he began to admire my now bare chest. Only the moonlight filtered in through the window blinds and the glow seemed to illuminate his beautiful face. As he watched me carefully, I took the opportunity to remove the rest of the fabric on his body so there wasn’t anything between us now.
Tugging on his jeans, Ryder removed them in one quick movement that had me giggling before he crushed his lips back down on mine.
Ryder’s hands began to roam down my neck and to my waist as he placed small kisses over every inch of my trembling body. As I allowed my body to be taken over by Ryder. My eyes roamed over his body, examining every muscle, curve, and...tattoo. Now that was an exciting find. Licking my lips, I felt an urge to reach out and lick the colors inked into his arm.
Glancing up at me again, Ryder took in a deep breath. “Are you sure about this?” he asked, breathless. “I don’t want you doing anything you aren’t ready for.”
Nodding my head yes, I allowed that to confirm that I wanted him as desperately as he wanted me. Kissing me again as he used his legs to open mine wider. “Yes, I need you,” I breathed.
Crashing his lips to mine, Ryder allowed his tongue to push past my lips. Once inside my mouth, I began to suck on his tongue, in a slow rhythm that drove him insane. My body throbbed with the need to please him as I continued my slow taunt of his mouth. I could feel him growing hard against my leg and from what I could feel, he was working with a lot.
Ryder’s eyes grew wide as he gazed at me. I knew my actions were driving him wild, and that was exactly what I wanted to do. As his hands roamed over the most sensitive parts of my body, I allowed a loud moan to escape from my lips. I arched my back and threw my head back as I inhaled a breath.
“I’m clean,” he advised.
Shit, I hadn’t thought about sex in so long, I didn’t have any condoms available.
“Me too,” I replied. “I could go check the bathroom for a condom, if you want,” I ask.
I am hoping he says no. While reckless, I don’t want him to get off of me right now. We are so close to crossing that line of no return.
“Would you hate me if I said I didn’t want you to use one? I’ve never been inside of a woman without a condom and I want to experience that with you,” he says.
I suck in a breath as his statement both shocks and exhilarates me.
“I want to feel you inside of me,” I moan, giving him the ok to move on.
Ryder smirks and then I feel him move my panties before he begins to move inside of me. My clit retracts and opens for him. I gasp as he moves deeper inside of me.
I buck my hips, taking him in as far as I can get. As he begins to rock in and out of me, I hold onto him like he is my lifeline.
My climax builds with each thrust and just when I think I am not going to be able to last any longer, he slows his movements and slips a finger down to rub my clit. I lean in and barely nibble his shoulder to keep from screaming so loud, the neighbors may call the police.
I can feel Ryder’s erection throbbing as he, too, is about to find his release.
“Faster. Harder,” I plead, letting my head fall back.
Ryder begins to move at a quick pace, while trailing kisses down my neck.
“I’m about to come,” he shouts, pulling out of me and shooting his come on the bed.
I climax too, falling back on the bed and smiling as I catch my breath.
Ryder rolls over and props his head on his elbow. His dangerous and flirty smile makes me blush as he looks at me. I am vulnerable right now. Naked and all of my emotions already displayed for him. There is nothing left hidden with this man.
Ryder leans in again and places a soft and sweet kiss on my lips. “That was incredible. You are incredible,” he says.
I brush his hair out of his face and allow my fingers to trail down his cheek. The stubble on his chin feels funny beneath my fingers, but I realize it’s something I want to feel over and over again.
“That was unexpected, but amazing,” I breathe.
“Can I stay the night?” Ryder asks.
I nod, yes, as I fall into his arms. Together, we fall asleep together cradled in one another's arms.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Waking up, I feel a light tickle on my arm. Opening one eye, I spot Meghan’s beautiful face smiling down at me. She doesn’t realize I am awake yet, so I am going to play along with her for a minute.
She gazes at my tattoo. It’s a frog skeleton, outlined in black. For most people, it is a strange image to have inked on your arm forever. For me though, it represents so much. In the SEALS, a frog skeleton tattoo means you have lost a SEAL brother. It holds so much meaning and memories for me. It’s a reminder to never forget where I’ve been, where I’m going, and those who lost their lives to protect us all.
Finally, I can’t stand not speaking to her. “Do you like it?” I ask.
Meghan almost jumps, alarmed that I am awake now.
I chuckle at her surprised reaction.
“I do. What is it?” she asks, examining the design.
“It’s a frog skeleton,” I say. I go on to describe to her what it represents. She nods along, smiling as I tell her the story about how we all got drunk one night when we returned home and all of my brothers went and got the tattoos.
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br /> “I think that’s sweet,” she says.
We sit there silently for a minute, just enjoying the moment. That’s when it hits me. I didn’t wake up in a cold sweat this morning. Now that I think about it, I don’t recall any terrifying dreams filled with gunshots and screams.
“What are you thinking about?” Meghan asks, examining my face.
“This is the first morning in years that I have woken up without having a nightmare,” I tell her. It sounds silly, but Meghan opened up to me, so I will always be honest with her, too.
Her eyes glisten and for a moment, I think she is going to cry.
“I was thinking the same thing, too. I have woken up countless mornings, yelling and crying after having a dream about a fire or Wade’s death. But, today I didn’t,” she says, smiling at me.
I sit up and pull her onto my lap. Meghan’s ample breasts fall in my face as she straddles me. There is nothing between us right now, and my dick is ready for more action. Glancing down, Meghan bites her lip, an act that she knows drives me wild, and then she kisses me.
We spend the next thirty minutes making love again.
* * *
After Meghan and I shower together, I left her apartment in time to go home and change my clothes. We have a staff meeting this morning to discuss the events that happened at the Port last night. When Meghan began opening up to me last night, something strange came over me. I had never wanted someone as badly as I had wanted her. And, it broke my fucking heart that she worried about me. Yes, my job came with risk, but everything did. You could get hit by a car crossing the street. I never lived my life with fear, but I also didn’t want to make Meghan worry about me. She trusted me enough to open her heart up to me, there was no way I was going to fuck that up.
Now, sitting at Cole Security Forces for a morning briefing, I sip a cup of stale coffee I got from the break room.
Jackson had left for Virginia, so we are left in the trusty hands of Brett, the new second in command here at this office.
Matt takes a seat next to me and he holds his own styrofoam cup of coffee. Brett makes his way to the front of the conference room and we all get quiet.
“From yesterday’s notes, it appears that one of the Port workers is aiding in the illegal shipment of contraband. Ryder and Matt witnessed an argument take place and two other security details noted that they had witnessed suspicious activity. We believe a new shipment will come in tonight. Because of this, I want everyone on duty. Ryder and Matt are already scheduled for a shift, so everyone else will serve as undercover officers and be waiting for the takedown with local law enforcement,” he stated.
I felt my adrenaline spike as I realized I would finally get to utilize my skills. Taking down the bad guys was what I was trained for.
Chapter Twenty-Three
I walked into MLA Publishing feeling like I was floating on cloud nine. My body was satisfied, my mind clear, and my heart swelled with adoration for an amazing man.
Kirsten and Ashley had returned home late last night and had gone straight to bed. Ryder was up and gone before either one of them stirred. I would tell them tonight what had happened between me and Ryder, but for now, I was enjoying the news as my own little secret.
Waking in Ryder’s arms was unlike anything I could have ever imagined. I guess I hadn’t realized how much I missed being in a man's arms, until I felt that warm sensation again. It was the first time in forever that I felt safe and protected. It was nice and something I could definitely get used to.
I knew I would be seeing Ryder again tonight for our scheduled date, and that had me skipping through the office this morning.
“Someone is in a good mood,” Melanie stated, as she smiled at me.
I walked into her office for our rescheduled meeting to work on our feature article about Ryder and the rest of the ex-navy SEALS.
As I sat down in one of her chairs, I crossed my legs and placed my notebook in my lap. I had felt so good when I got dressed for work today, I went the extra mile jazzing up my look with a form-fitting blush pink dress that fell just above my knees. Silver pumps and a dangling silver chain completed my ensemble.
“I am in a good mood today,” I said, blushing a bit. “In fact, I owe you a big thanks for your advice yesterday,” I add.
Waving me off, Melanie sits down across from me and shakes her head. “No need to thank me. I want you to be happy.”
“Well, I am. Ryder and I had a great talk yesterday and we are finally moving forward with this relationship,” I sighed. I did, however, leave out the fact that we had amazing and mind-blowing sex. I didn’t feel like that would be very workplace appropriate, but by the huge grin smothered on my face, something told me that Melanie could figure that part out on her own.
“I am glad to hear that. Now, we can get back to the article,” Melanie said, getting back into work mode.
Happy to begin feeling useful at work again, we delved right into the article. First, we began comparing notes on the interview questions that Melanie had sent out to Ryder and the other guys. They were pretty standard questions: ages, years of military experience, family, and hobbies. The idea was to give the reader a glimpse of who these guys were as people first then jump into their roles as SEALS. I began reading over the responses to the questions on what it was like during combat. To be honest, I cringed a few times reading over lines where the men described being attacked by enemies, wearing heavy layers of clothing and protective gear in the scorching desert heat, and how they would at times, question if they would ever return home. Ryder’s responses were raw and honest and I had to fight back the urge to cry.
“Why don’t we split up the guys and each of us writes about two of their stories. Then we can work together on the first few paragraphs of the feature which describes the need for Cole Security Forces to bring in ex- SEALS,” Melanie states.
I nod as I continue taking notes and then once we feel like we are ready to branch off and work independently, we debrief and then I head to my office.
As I write my portion of the article, I feel a sense of pride just knowing Ryder. His life has been spent at war and working to protect others. He is such a noble and honorable man and I can’t help but feel myself falling for him.
* * *
After lunch, I get a text from Ryder.
Ryder: Are we still on for our park date tonight?
Me: Of course!
Ryder: Perfect, I will be there at seven. I have to work tonight, but not until 11. We have plenty of time to spend together.
Seeing that Ryder had to work late at night at the Port had my anxiety spiking, but I had promised both of us that I would trust Ryder. He survived war, I shouldn’t have to worry about him doing a routine security job.
Me: Wonderful. I will be ready.
My flirty text had me smiling to myself as I put my phone away and dived back into my article. More than anything I wanted to capture Ryder and his friends in a way that would make them look like the amazing heroes they are, and make Melanie proud of me.
As I sat back in my chair, I realized that my life was finally on track again. I just hoped nothing would happen to derail my happiness.
Chapter Twenty-Four
My shift tonight will begin at 11. But, until then, I am going to spend as much time with Meghan that I can get. When she left work, she had texted me so I could meet her at her apartment. I drove so fast on my way there, I was sure I had broken most speeding limits.
I was waiting by her door when she finally arrived. She looked amazing as usual and my hands were desperate to touch her.
The evening sky was clear with not a cloud in sight. A slight breeze added a nice chill to the air and I was certain tonight would be a perfect evening for our park date.
“Hey,” Meghan said, walking up to me and placing a chaste kiss on my cheek. “Let me just change my clothes and then we can go. I’m starving,” she added, unlocking her apartment door.
I followed her inside and my hands q
uickly found her sultry hips. “I could help you undress if needed,” I smirked, pulling her body against mine.
Laughing, Meghan spun in my arms so that we were now facing one another. “If I let you do that, we would never make it out of here,” she giggled.
“Fine by me,” I said, my tone deep and filled with need.
I saw her eyes considering the proposition for a minute, but then she shoved me aside and laughed to herself as she walked back to her bedroom.
Ten minutes later, she returned wearing a pair of denim jeans, a black silk shirt, and black flats. She looked beautiful even when she dressed down. I think Meghan could wear a paper bag and still be the most beautiful woman in the world.
We left her apartment and stopped at a small deli and picked up sandwiches, potato salad, and chips. It would be the perfect dinner while sitting under the stars and watching a movie in the park. I loved how in the summer months, the city would play movies in the park.
When we arrived at the park, there were already a ton of people filling the space. My senses went on high alert. Even after leaving the SEALS, my training kept me always on the lookout for danger. Big crowds were always a place that made me nervous, but I didn’t dare show that to Meghan. I knew she worried enough about me, so the last thing I would want to do is add more worry for her.
“Where do you want to sit?” Meghan asked, glancing around for an open area.
My instincts told me to sit where there was easy access to leave if needed. I spotted an open area near the sidewalk. Two large trees provided shade for the remaining sunlight that was slowly fading away. “How about over there,” I ask, pointing to the area.
Meghan nods and we make our way to the spot. Sitting down, we begin taking our food out of the bags. A large screen is displayed on the stage that on the weekends has live concerts here in the park. As we began to eat, I watched as Meghan looked so peaceful as she sat on the grass. I was beyond grateful that she was low maintenance like myself. She didn’t require a fancy restaurant to be happy, she was perfectly content sitting here in the park with me.
