The alternative was a lot bloodier, and I would never forgive myself if something happened to my dad just because I didn’t want to go to another one of the Gromley’s stupid dinners.
“I could eat,” I said, voice sounding much too small for my liking.
Wes relaxed his grip on my throat, and something akin to tenderness took the place of malice in his eyes.
“You shouldn’t rile me up like that,” he said. “We both know you have to do whatever I say. Why do you have to make it so hard for yourself?”
He didn’t step back, didn’t give me the space I so desperately needed in that moment. Without my heels, Wes was at least six inches taller than me, and he used every single one in intimidation like a pro. When he was like this, though, he slumped over as if being cruel to me took a physical toll on him. His face was right in front of mine, eye to eye. His were bloodshot. Mine were blurring with tears. I blinked them away as he waited for my answer. I hadn’t cried in a long time, but something about tonight was getting to me. Maybe I was just breaking after all.
“You know why,” I replied.
Wes’s thin lips curved bitterly. “Because you think you’re too good for me.”
“Because a man who demands affection doesn’t deserve it.”
He backed away, and I felt like I could breathe again. Shaking his head, Wes walked to the door and stood with his hand on the handle.
“That’s where you’re wrong. A man who takes what he wants in life is the one who deserves it most.” He looked back at me. “You’ll see that someday. Someday very soon.”
“I won’t, Wes. As soon as my father’s debt is paid, I’m out of here.”
It was the frankest discussion we’d had regarding our “arrangement” in a long time. I blamed it on my sudden and unwelcome spike in emotions. A stupid part of me hoped that if I could make him understand, if I could make him believe that I would never love him, he’d realize it was pointless and let me go. He wanted my whole submission—not just my body, but my heart and soul as well. The twisted fucker wanted me to love him. Surely if he saw that wasn’t possible, he’d give up.
His eyes turned hard, and I thought he might come back to throttle me again, but he opened the door.
“You’ve got fifteen minutes,” he said. “Don’t keep us waiting.”
Wes slammed the door behind him so hard it rattled the glass bottles strewn about my vanity. I didn’t waste any more time standing by the wall and bustled back over to the mirror to finish the job of removing my stage makeup as quickly as possible. Afterward, I put on some mascara and a little lipstick, knowing that Preston would only get pissed if I showed up completely natural, and changed into a form-flattering dress and a pair of modest heels for dinner.
I made it up to Preston’s office with a minute to spare. He was a stickler for punctuality, and I’d already poked enough bears tonight. I just wanted to get this dinner over with and go home to check on my dad. He probably hadn’t eaten since this afternoon and would be up late working. These days that was practically all he did.
Preston smiled approvingly as I walked into the room. Two men in suits occupied the leather armchairs across from him at his desk. This office was similar to the one at his house, just smaller. Even though the club itself was a complete dive, Preston made most of his money managing loans and other shady shit, and he liked to look the part.
“Excellent show tonight, dearest,” drawled Preston. “You’ve earned yourself two new admirers.”
He made it sound like a coveted prize. Preston loved to taunt.
The men in the chairs craned their necks to look at me, both showing off crooked sets of teeth in matching licentious grins.
Wes crossed the room and threaded his arm through mine. “Anybody who sees her can’t help but admire her.”
“That’s true.” Preston rose languidly from his chair. “I could never have dreamed that a burlesque show would bring in so much business, but Dallas knows how to draw a crowd.”
One of the men laughed. “Well, with a body like that...”
I was used to being talked about like I wasn’t in the room, but it still annoyed the hell out of me. I glared at the two men, and the one who’d spoken about my body wisely didn’t say anything else.
“Let’s go,” said Wes. “I’m hungry.”
“Yes, let’s.” Preston ushered us all out, and we passed through the club on our way outside. The girls always danced a little sexier when they saw the Gromleys passing by, and the guys always stared in awe. Everyone wanted a piece of the Gromleys. Everyone except me, ironically.
We stepped outside, and a couple of smokers across the street cheered when they saw us. I usually tried to keep my head high and my sights distant, but something just beyond the stumbling smokers caught my eye. Someone. We passed by too quickly, but I could’ve sworn I’d glimpsed a familiar face, one I hadn’t seen in years. Hair that was darker than I remembered but still familiar, chiseled jaw, devilish mouth. Could it be?
A blast of cold wind knocked the foolish fantasy out of my head. Shane wouldn’t be here. He couldn’t be. Nobody had seen or heard from him since that awful night at Preston’s party, and nobody expected to. It was just my mind playing tricks on me, another symptom of what I hoped wouldn’t turn out to be an emotional tailspin. I needed to get my head screwed on tight or I’d end up messing things up for myself more than they already were. What was wrong with me tonight?
I followed Wes into the waiting car and didn’t look back.
Chapter 20
Shane
I loitered outside Satan’s Perch for nearly an hour just to get a glimpse of her, and it was completely worth it.
Dallas looked miles different from the sweet young girl with Broadway dreams that she was when I left Sitka Valley, and I understood why Jake thought I might not recognize her. She’d chopped off her long hair to her shoulders and dyed it black as spilled ink. Her nose had a ring in it, and her once tanned complexion had faded to an ivory hue. She was just as striking, but now she was beautiful in a different way. A fiercer way. She may have followed Wes into the backseat of that limousine willingly, but she didn’t look happy. It made my blood boil to think that she’d been under his thumb all this time. I didn’t believe it at first when Jake told me she was with Wes, that she had been since his dad chased me out of town. I couldn’t believe that she would enter such a relationship willingly, which made me wonder what was going on behind the scenes.
I couldn’t think about it for now. If I did, it was only going to make me angry, and when I was angry I wasn’t smart. I wanted to help Dallas and the only way I could do that was to be smart.
I watched the limo sail off and then walked back to where I’d parked my bike. It felt good to ride around these familiar streets, even if there was potential danger at every corner. The fact that someone might recognize me at any second was a little exhilarating. I spent my entire exile looking forward to coming back and exacting my revenge, and my proximity to both Dallas and my goal was a rush. I couldn’t wait to kick Wes’s ass, both for what he did to me and what he was still doing to Dallas. Preston too. I didn’t have a clue how I was going to fix this, but I would have to try. First order of business was figuring out what exactly there was to fix since I didn’t know what Gromley had on Dallas that would compel her to be his pet.
The only person I could safely ask was Dallas’s father, which was convenient since I had a hunch it had something to do with him. It was late, so I headed straight for Randall’s house. The trip took me past Keane’s Bikes on the way, and I was surprised to see the lights still on in the auto shop. I parked my bike around back and banged on the back door, where he was most likely to hear it.
A couple of minutes later, Randall unlocked the door and opened it a crack.
“What do you want?” he asked, glaring at me. “I paid this month already. If Tommy ran off with the money I gave him, that’s not my fault.”
A second later, Randall’s eyes f
illed with recognition.
“Shane!” he hissed. “Sorry about that. I thought you were one of Gromley’s. Shit, come in, come in.” He opened the door wider and enthusiastically gestured for me to enter.
Once inside, Randall locked the door again and led me down to his office. We passed the shop doors, and I saw a bike on the jack, tools scattered around on the ground. He was working at this hour?
“What are you doing here?” Randall asked. “Did Gromley have a change of heart? That doesn’t seem like him. It’s good to see you, either way. Really good. Do you want a beer?”
We stepped into his office, and I took a seat by the wall. It was a lot tidier than I’d ever seen it, no stray paperwork cluttering the desktop, not a dirty coffee mug in sight.
“I’ll take a beer,” I said.
Randall nodded and grabbed two beers from the mini fridge in the corner, handing me one. I cracked it open and took a drink.
“Gromley has no idea I’m here, and I’d be grateful if you didn’t tell him,” I said.
“Of course I won’t.” Randall cracked his beer but didn’t drink. “A lot’s changed since I last saw you. I don’t even know where to begin.”
I did. “What’s this about paying this month? Do you owe him money?”
All the light that had risen in Randall’s eyes fell away. He sagged down into his chair and spun to face me, sighing.
“There is nothing I regret more in this life than getting involved with that shady weasel,” he said. “One minute I was taking out a small loan, the next I’m up to my neck in debt with no end in sight. My daughter...she hates me. I don’t blame her. She spends almost all her time with the Gromleys, either cozying up to them or dancing at their club, and never makes a cent of her own. I’ve been working day and night but it’s going to be years before I can pay Preston back, and I have a feeling it’ll be too late by the time I do.”
“How much money?”
Randall winced. “Just over a hundred grand.”
I whistled and took another sip of beer. “That’s a tidy sum.”
“Don’t suppose you’re a billionaire now, are you?”
I laughed. “Would that I were. I’ve done okay for myself, but I’m still just a military man with unfinished business.”
“Unfinished business?” Randall cocked an eyebrow. “You’re not telling me you’ve come back just to get some revenge on Gromley, are you? You’d be better off trying to battle global warming with a handful of ice and an Al Gore DVD. Take advice from somebody who knows—you made it out of this town in one piece, and you’re better off staying that way. Just leave. Go be happy somewhere else. Is your pride worth losing everything?”
“If it were just my pride, then I would,” I said. “But there’s something much more important at stake.”
“Like what?” Randall’s brow furrowed in thought, then his eyebrows shot up to his hairline. “No! Shane, if you came here with the intent of helping us get out of the mess I put us in, you can get right back on that bike of yours and go back to a place where things make sense. There is no helping us.”
I took a long draw of my beer and examined his expression. He meant it. Randall believed they were a lost cause.
“What do you mean?” I asked. “There has to be something I can do.”
Randall shook he head. “I’ve tried everything. Even though he obviously duped me and everything he does is shady, everyone in Sitka Valley is on Preston’s side. He’s practically a god here, and he’s only gotten more powerful since you left, now that his son’s in on the family business with him. The only thing I can do is keep my head down and continue working away, and maybe that’ll be enough.”
“That’s grim.”
He shrugged. “Welcome to my reality, son.”
“I don’t subscribe to your reality.”
“Then you’re going to get yourself killed.”
I frowned into my beer and Randall set his on the desk, sighing. I looked up, and there was warmth in his gaze.
“It means a lot that you’d risk your biscuit to come back for her. She was devastated when you left, and not just because her daddy’s mistakes got her a new boyfriend that she despises. But I know my girl, and I know she’d rather go down fighting than see someone she cares about get hurt trying to save her.” He chuckled. “She’s her mother’s daughter in that way.”
“How can they do all this?”
Agitation rippled under my skin. Framed like this, the situation did seem hopeless, but I refused to believe that.
“She’s not a piece of meat. Wes can’t just put his stamp on her because you owe his father money. It’s not right.”
“Of course it’s not right,” Randall acknowledged. “We’re insurance on each other, you see. I pay my bill every month, and nothing bad happens to her. They know that she’s the only thing I’ve got. Otherwise, I would’ve hit the road a long time ago. I tried to, in fact.” His eyes grew sad, distant. “I tried to get us both out of here, but it was no good.”
“What happens if she leaves?” I asked.
Randall chuckled bitterly. “If Dallas leaves before my debt is paid, I’m dead, and she has to take over the rest of the debt. Simple as that. That’s as good as guaranteed that she’ll stay with Wes for the rest of her life if they want her to.”
My hand tightened on the beer until the can buckled. A little liquid sloshed down the side, and I took a deep breath.
“Sorry,” I said. “I just...I just can’t believe it’s this bad.”
“Believe it.” He shrugged. “I had to accept the hopelessness of it a long time ago, or I would’ve gone crazy.” He winked. “I might still.”
“Randall, I’m going to do everything I can to help you and Dallas,” I told him.
“I believe that you’ll try,” he said. “I just wish I could believe that you’ll succeed.”
Chapter 21
Dallas
I was about midway through my set when the bout of madness hit me again. That was what I was calling it, anyway. The night before in bed I’d spent hours dissecting that one-second glimpse of the crowd where I thought I’d seen Shane’s face. I tried not to, tried to tell myself there was no way it could be him, but a voice inside whispered I was wrong.
So what if it was him, I finally decided. He would be an idiot to return to Sitka Valley, and I would be an idiot to talk to him if he did. I’d only end up getting my dad and me in more trouble, all for some childhood crush with a hero complex. I had a bad habit of romanticizing Shane in my mind. A dangerous habit. He couldn’t be as good as I remembered him—no man was. I was on my own in this world, and it was better that way. The last person I relied on was my dad, and he led me straight to the slaughter.
These thoughts were still spinning in my head when I went on stage the next day, so it was no surprise when I thought I saw Shane again. Now I knew it had to be in my head. Even if Shane were back in town, there was no way he’d go to Satan’s Perch unless he had a death wish.
The glimpse wasn’t fleeting this time, though. I lost him for a second as I dropped into a low squat, but when I came back up there he was.
Our eyes met and time slowed. He had a crew cut, and even from a distance I could tell he was bigger. He still had that same intensity in his eyes, the kind that makes you forget there is anything else in the world. The kind that makes you forget your dance steps.
I stumbled, pitching forward awkwardly. I managed to catch my footing and transition into the splits, making the flub look almost intentional. My face burned. He must’ve seen. Did he know that I just completely lost my shit because of him?
I tried not to think about it but still found myself scanning the crowd for his face when I got back on my feet. He was gone.
Okay, now I knew I was going crazy. Maybe I had a brain tumor or something that was making me hallucinate people from my past. Only, if that were the case, why was I hallucinating an older version of Shane? Was that just my imagination outdoing itself?
I needed air. Rather than heading to my dressing room after my set, I headed straight for the backstage loading door. The alley it led into was sketchy as hell on a good day, but one of the great things about being Gromley property was that not even the dirtiest mugger would take the chance.
The motion sensor floodlight flicked on as I stepped out into the chilly air. One of the bulbs was out, so it was dim at best, but better than nothing. I left the door propped open with a chunk of wood and walked down a few feet to rest my back against the brick wall. I tilted my face toward the strip of sky visible between the tops of the buildings. Only a couple of the brightest stars were visible, and I couldn’t help but remember the night that Shane took me out to his spot in the forest and showed me the entire universe. If I wanted to go stargazing it would be easy enough to accomplish, especially given that the view from Preston and Wes’s top deck was sensational, but it wouldn’t be the same. I longed for simpler days, when staring up at the stars made me feel limitless. Now it just made me feel small. Helpless.
I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes. I promised myself that I would never let the word helpless into my vocabulary again. I wasn’t helpless—I was just in a sticky situation, but it wouldn’t always be so sticky. If I didn’t keep my shit together, though, it wouldn’t matter whether I got out of this web or not. I wouldn’t make it that long.
I sighed and turned back to the door. That was enough air for one evening.
I didn’t notice the footsteps until they were right behind me, until the hand fell on my shoulder. Adrenaline spiked my system. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe there was someone stupid enough to try something even though I was under Wes’s “protection”. The thought sickened me, and I spun on my heel, punching out with both hands at my would-be attacker, hoping to catch him by surprise.
Shane caught my fists easily, eyes flashing with amusement. “Feisty as ever, I see.”
My body reacted before my mind had time to process. Heat flared deep in my belly, like a long-simmering fire bursting to life in one magnificent explosion. I ripped my hands out of his grip and staggered back, desperate to put some distance between us.
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