The Betrayed Fiancée

by Wanda E. Brunstetter

  “So you speak Pennsylvania Dutch and everything?”

  “Jah. It means yes.”

  Kristi’s thoughts were all over the place, wondering why Joel had kept this from her and what made him leave the Amish faith. She glanced at him, then looked at the dashboard, unable to form a response.

  “Kristi, did you hear me?” Joel’s voice sounded strained.

  “Yes, I heard.” Kristi swallowed hard, struggling not to cry. Apparently, this man she’d come to care for so deeply wasn’t the person she knew. No wonder Joel hadn’t wanted her to meet his family and kept saying they were different. Did he think she was so shallow she couldn’t have accepted his heritage?

  “Don’t you have anything to say?” Joel placed his hand over Kristi’s and tenderly held her fingers.

  Feeling a painful tightness in her throat, Kristi pulled away from his grasp, bringing her arms close to her chest. “Joel, would you please pull over?”

  Up ahead, he found a safe place to pull off the road and then turned off the ignition.

  She rubbed her temples, trying to comprehend his startling confession. “Look at me, Joel.” Kristi waited until she had his full attention. “I can’t believe you would lie about something so important.”

  “I—I didn’t lie. I just didn’t volunteer the information.”

  “Why was it necessary to keep this from me?” Her forehead wrinkled.

  He shrugged, looking toward the highway. “I—I don’t know. Guess I assumed you might be uncomfortable around my family and wouldn’t understand why I gave up the Amish way of life.”

  Kristi reached out and touched his chin, turning him to face her. “Why did you?”

  Joel raked shaky fingers through the side of his hair and groaned. “I wanted something more than the Plain life could offer.”

  “Like what?”

  He tapped the steering wheel a couple of times. “A car, for one thing. I had one when I went through my rumschpringe, and it was hard to give it up.”

  “Rumschpringe? What’s that?”

  “It means ‘running around.’ It’s a time when young people who have grown up in an Amish home have the chance to explore the world outside their faith.” Joel cleared his throat. “Then they have the right to choose between joining the Amish church or going English.”

  “So you went English.”

  He nodded. “But not till after I’d joined the Amish church, which, of course, made it worse when I left.”

  Kristi massaged the bridge of her nose and sighed. After her shopping trip to Holmes County with her mother, she’d done a little reading about the Amish culture and remembered one article stating how hard it was on a family when one of them left the faith. No wonder Joel prayed silently and not out loud. This also explained why he was able to find Bible passages easily whenever they went to church and followed the pastor’s message. I should have questioned him more about it.

  “Did you ever plan to tell me your family is Amish, or did you only blurt it out now because we’re on our way to your father’s funeral?” Kristi tried not to let her irritation show, but this was unnerving.

  Joel remained silent for several seconds. “I—I would have told you eventually, but I was worried about how you’d respond.”

  “I would have dealt with it better if you’d told me right away.” Kristi’s muscles tightened.

  “I’m sorry, Kristi. I didn’t think you’d understand, and I was wrong to assume how you’d react.”

  “All I know is you weren’t honest with me, and that bothers me a lot.”

  His ears reddened. “Look, can we talk about this later? It’s gonna take all my strength to get through the funeral today.”

  Kristi felt bad about being pushy, but she wanted to know everything Joel kept hidden from her. I have to be considerate of his feelings right now. If one of my parents passed away unexpectedly, I’d want him to do the same.

  She sighed, slipping down a bit in her seat. But it’s difficult to be supportive when he’s kept his family hidden from me for so long—especially since I’ve told him everything about my family, and even shared some things from my childhood. I wish I’d have met Joel’s father and known what kind of person he was.

  Kristi pushed herself back up with her elbows to get repositioned in her seat. In sympathy, she placed her hand on Joel’s arm. “Today will be difficult, but God will help you endure the pain.”

  Joel made no comment as he started the car and pulled back onto the road.

  “Is your mother still alive?” Kristi spoke quietly, hoping Joel wouldn’t be upset with all her questions.

  He shook his head. “She had a heart attack and died two years ago.”

  “I’m sorry, Joel.” Kristi couldn’t imagine losing both of her parents, especially in such a short span of time. “You had said it was your sister who called with the news of your father’s death. Do you have other siblings?”

  “I have three sisters—Elsie, Arlene, and Doris. They’re all older than me.” Joel changed lanes to pass a slow-moving vehicle.

  “Where do they live?”

  “Arlene and her family live in Farmerstown. Doris lives in Berlin with her husband, Brian. Elsie, the oldest, lives in Millersburg. Oh, and my dad lived in Charm.” Joel rubbed the back of his neck. “That’s where I went for the viewing yesterday. The funeral will be held there today as well.”

  “I see.” Kristi had wanted to attend the viewing with Joel, but didn’t want to ask for two days off in a row. They were shorthanded at the nursing home right now, and one of the other nurses who normally worked Saturdays had traded with Kristi so she could attend the funeral.

  “In case you don’t know, Amish church services, weddings, and funerals are held in church members’ homes or in one of their outside buildings. Sometimes they rent a large tent if there isn’t room to accommodate everyone indoors. So no church or funeral home is used at any Amish funeral,” Joel explained.

  Kristi gripped her armrest as he increased the speed. Now he’d begun passing everyone on the highway, probably to make sure they got to the funeral on time. Trying to keep her mind off how fast Joel was driving, Kristi thought more about the Amish. She had read something concerning their funerals, as well, but experiencing an Amish funeral service firsthand would enlighten her further. But she couldn’t help wondering if Joel’s sisters knew about her and how they would accept an outsider.

  Charm, Ohio

  The only thing in their favor today was the weather. Although the sky was gray, at least it wasn’t raining. As they drew closer to his father’s house, Joel’s palms became sweaty, and his heart pounded. In addition to concern over how Kristi would respond to his family, he worried that she might say or do the wrong thing at any moment simply because she was unfamiliar with Amish ways.

  On second thought, it might be me who says or does the wrong thing. Joel’s jaw tightened. It seemed to be the norm whenever he visited his family.

  He glanced to his right and observed Kristi, noticing her head turned toward the side window, with both hands resting on her lap. Was she looking at the scenery or thinking about all the things he’d told her so far?

  I shouldn’t have waited so long to admit I used to be Amish, he berated himself. It didn’t do a thing to strengthen our relationship. If anything, it probably made it worse.

  Sweat beaded on Joel’s forehead as he continued to mull things over. If she knew about my other deceptions, she’d probably never talk to me again. Sure wish she hadn’t gotten so quiet all of a sudden.

  Releasing one sweaty hand from the steering wheel, he rubbed it dry on his pants. Joel tried to relax, but as they approached his father’s driveway, he was hit with a wave of nausea. It was hard to believe Dad was actually gone, but all the buggies parked in the field gave truth to the fact of how many people had come here today to pay their last respects and uphold Joel’s family. It was the Amish way.

  Joel pulled his car up beside Dad’s barn and turned off the engine. Rea
ching across the seat, he took Kristi’s hand. “Are you sure you’re ready for this?”

  Squeezing his fingers, she nodded.

  Doris peered out the living-room window, watching as her brother got out of his car. He strode around to the other side and opened the door for another passenger. Then the two started walking toward the house. “There’s a young woman with Joel. I wonder who she is.” Doris turned to her sister Arlene who stood beside her, holding baby Samuel.

  Arlene stepped closer to the window. “I have no idea, but her auburn hair is sure pretty. When Joel was here yesterday, he didn’t say anything about bringing anyone to the funeral with him.”

  “Maybe she’s his girlfriend. Look, he has his arm around her waist.”

  “Or maybe she’s his fraa. Could Joel have gotten married without telling any of us?”

  Arlene shrugged her slender shoulders. “I wouldn’t put anything past our brother.”

  “Me neither.” Doris sniffed and dabbed at her tears. “Whoever the woman is, I’m afraid she’s going to see us with red-rimmed, swollen eyes. These past three days it’s been hard for me not to cry every time I think of Dad.”

  “Same here. It’s so difficult to accept his death.”

  Their sister, Elsie, joined them at the window. “I see our bruder made it. Who’s the young woman walking up the stairs with him? Do either of you recognize her?”

  Arlene shook her head.

  Doris turned her hands palm up. “I don’t know. Let’s open the door and find out.”

  CHAPTER 3

  As Kristi stood beside Joel at his father’s graveside service, she observed those around them. Everyone wore somber expressions, and the four girls, whom she’d learned were Elsie and Arlene’s daughters, wept openly. Kristi had a difficult time, herself, as she swallowed around the lump in her throat. She thought about how Joel and his family must feel right now. Since she hadn’t met any of them until today, Kristi could only try to put herself in their shoes.

  She’d always been emotional when it came to these types of situations. Even when it was a joyous occasion, she could cry at the drop of a hat. Whenever Kristi heard “Taps” or a sentimental song on the radio, her eyes would well up with tears. As soon as she heard the “Wedding March” in a marriage scene in a movie, her tears flowed. But right now, Kristi wanted to be strong for Joel.

  Taking a deep breath, she fought for control and reached for Joel’s hand—not only to give herself comfort, but to offer him reassurance, as well. She glanced at him, unable to read his stoic expression. Throughout the funeral service held in his father’s home, Joel hadn’t shed a single tear. Nor had he cried when the family filed up to the coffin to view the deceased’s body. Even on the night Joel learned of his father’s death, he had shown little emotion—at least not in Kristi’s presence. Perhaps he had done his crying privately or yesterday at the viewing. She hoped it was the case, because holding one’s feelings in was not a good thing.

  While Kristi never had the opportunity to meet Eustace Byler, her heart went out to his family as they huddled together. Joel had been right when he’d told her what to expect today. This was not the typical funeral she’d attended in the past.

  A slight wind blew, scattering golden leaves across the cemetery and filling the air with a damp, musty aroma. Dismal gray clouds covered the sky, but at least it wasn’t raining. In the distance, Kristi noticed a tree giving off hints of an autumn blush. It stood vivid against the drab, colorless sky.

  Turning her head to the left, Kristi noticed a young woman with golden-brown hair glance in her direction, then look quickly away. Was she part of Joel’s family—someone she hadn’t met? Or perhaps she was a member of Joel’s father’s church. The woman appeared to be around Joel’s age. She was pretty, even though her blue eyes were puffy from crying. It appeared the young woman had come alone, for she stood off to one side by herself.

  Since Joel and Kristi were the only people dressed in English clothes, others were probably curious about them. Of course, many of them knew Joel personally. But since he’d left the Amish faith so many years ago, some might not realize who he was.

  Before long, the four pallbearers, each bearing a shovel, began taking dirt from the pile near the grave and covering up the coffin. While the grave was being filled in, a men’s group sang a hymn. Without the aid of any instruments, their voices filled the air with the sobering music. Once again, Kristi had to blink rapidly in an attempt to keep her eyes dry. At the conclusion of the graveside service, the bishop asked the people to pray the Lord’s Prayer silently.

  “I’m expected to go back to the house now for a meal and to visit awhile,” Joel whispered to Kristi. “Are you okay with it?”

  She gave an affirmative nod. In addition to doing the right thing, she was eager to become more familiar with Joel’s family. Those Kristi had been introduced to so far seemed kind. How could Joel keep from mentioning such a wonderful family to her all this time?

  After the simple funeral dinner, many people lingered. While Joel was outside visiting, Kristi went into the house to talk to his sisters.

  “What a beautiful piece. Did someone in your family make it?” Kristi asked Doris, when she noticed a lovely blue-and-pink quilted wall hanging with a star-pattern draped across the back of the couch.

  Doris’s eyes mirrored an inner glow as she trailed her fingers over the material. “My mother made it. She was always making full-sized quilts, wall hangings, table runners, and even potholders. Mama gave quilts to each of her daughters, as well as to many of her friends in the area.”

  “I’m impressed. She did beautiful work.”

  “I agree. My sister Elsie’s hobby is needlepoint.” Doris motioned to the wall across the room. “See the wall hanging there with the two hummingbirds and flowers? She made it for Mama as a Christmas gift one year.”

  “Your sister does nice work.” Kristi moved closer to take a better look. “I’m sure it takes a lot of patience to finish such a project.”

  “Actually, Elsie says she finds it quite relaxing to sit and needlepoint. She’s spent many hours making special items for family members and friends.” Doris smiled. “We all enjoy doing things meaningful with our hands during the long hours of winter.” She moved over to the couch and lifted the quilted wall hanging into her arms. “I’m surprised Dad kept all the quilts she didn’t give away, but then he had a hard time parting with anything. Some have called him a hoarder, and I guess it’s true.”

  Kristi reached out to touch the wall hanging, gently tracing her fingers on the stitches. “It was thoughtful of your mother to make something so lovely, especially for her children.” She sighed. “Someday, after Joel and I are married, I hope to own a quilt. Even a small one like this would be nice.”

  “Are you and my brother engaged?” Doris questioned.

  Kristi nodded. “Well, not officially. I don’t have a ring yet, but he did propose, and my answer was yes.”

  “Then you’ll soon be part of our family.” Doris handed Kristi the quilt. “Since you will become Joel’s wife, I’d like you to have one of Mama’s wall hangings. I’m sure my sisters would agree.”

  “I saw some Amish-made quilts in a shop in Berlin, and they were expensive. How much would you charge?” Simply holding the quilted piece gave Kristi a warm feeling.

  “Oh, my, not a penny. It’s a gift from our family.” Doris clasped Kristi’s arm. “You can either take this or choose one from some others in a box under my folks’ bed.”

  “I’d like this one.” Kristi fingered the edge of the quilt. She couldn’t believe she’d been presented with such a special gift. “I’ll take good care of it. Thank you so much.” She laid it down and gave Doris a hug.

  “You’re more than welcome. Before you go home, I’ll put it in a plastic bag so it doesn’t get dirty.” Doris placed her hands on the back of the couch. “Now I have a favor to ask.”

  “Anything. Anything at all.”

  “I was wondering
, if you have any influence over Joel, could you ask him to come visit more often?”

  “Doesn’t he do it now?”

  “He rarely comes around, and when he does…” Doris’s voice trailed off.

  “Joel works long hours because of his business. There are times when we’ve had plans to do something together, and he ends up working instead.” Kristi didn’t know why she felt the need to defend Joel. Working long hours was hardly an excuse for neglecting his family. “I’m sorry. I’ll have a talk with Joel about coming to visit more often.” Kristi took out a pen and tablet from her purse. Then she wrote down her phone number and handed it to Doris. “If there’s ever a time you can’t reach Joel, please give me a call.”

  “I appreciate it. I’ll give you my number, too.” After Doris wrote her phone number down for Kristi, she gestured to the kitchen. “Why don’t we go find Elsie and Arlene? I’d like them to get to know you better, too.”

  As Joel wandered around the yard, trying to avoid certain people, he glanced toward the back of Dad’s property. The tree house had been destroyed, but the heavily damaged section of the tree showed Joel where it had been. All that was left of the tree house were a few pieces of burned wood in a heap at the bottom of the tree. Even the steps, still nailed to the trunk, had been charred and blackened by the force of the lightning.

  Joel stopped and stared at the giant maple. From the blown-away bark at the top of the tree, the lightning had made a visible path all the way down its trunk. Some long pieces of splintered maple lay scattered on the ground a few feet from the tree. Other fragments of wood clung to the trunk, curled back like a banana peel.

  Stubborn man. Joel grunted. Can’t figure out why he’d want to build a tree house. Going up there with a storm approaching was a dumb idea.

  He leaned against a fence post, reflecting on his childhood. He and Doris had spent many hours playing hide-and-seek in Dad’s barn. They’d also climbed trees, taken turns on the swing, and chased after the cats. Wish Dad would have built a tree house when I was a boy. I could have had a lot of fun playing in it and maybe even camped out during the hot summer months.