by Mia Barrett
I feel faint. No, seriously. This is too much. This is the man I’ve thought about every single day since I was twelve years old and he’s just confessed his love while kissing my neck. A girl can only take so much. I sway forward and catch myself on his pecs, which feel a thousand times hotter than my virgin brain imagined. My jaw drops. They’re so hard. The dizziness takes my head.
“Sweetheart, are you okay? Was it the door? Did I hit you hard?” Ivan’s hands frame my face and his sweet, soulful eyes gaze into mine. He loves me. Why did he wait so long? Why didn’t he say something in Paris? Why is he saying it in a bathroom?
I’m about to ask, when the last voice I want to hear slices through our silence.
“ZOE! Where the hell are you? Snoopy and Charlie Brown are coming. You told me to give you a heads up or you were going to tear me a new one.” It’s Gus. He’s right. Those were my words.
“ZOE!!!” He bangs on the door.
“I’ll be right out! Damn it!” I shout.
“Oh, okay. Hurry, they’re making the turn at Columbus.” He gives two taps and walks off.
Ivan huffs and scowls at the door, sneering with contempt. When I jump off the vanity to test my equilibrium, he grabs my wrists, fearing I’m about to leave.
“Zoe, are you really with him?” His voice drips with sadness.
I should say no. It would be the honest thing to do. Why start things on the wrong foot? But then I recall a conversation I had with my mother late yesterday evening. Until recently, because of my age, my mother traveled to sets with me. She knows Gus and Ivan well. She’s always trusted Gus, implicitly. Sure, he’s an asshole. But there’s nothing seedy about him. She said he always looked at me with the eyes of a big brother. I was forever untouchable. Ivan never gave her that impression. The older I got, the more he appeared uncomfortable in my presence. Like he didn’t trust himself. It made her suspicious. Then I turned eighteen and he remained a perfect gentleman. She had to assume she was mistaken all along.
It was not what I wanted to hear, and I said as much. She apologized for being long-winded and continued. “Baby, little boys take their favorite teddy bear for granted, until another little boy wants to play with it.”
“And I’m the teddy?”
“Yes, ma’am. You are the teddy.”
Gus told me not to get ahead of myself. Make him fight for me. I waited all year for him to give me a tiny crumb of affection and it’s a big coincidence that he falls in love now that he thinks I’m seeing someone. No, I need to be sure. This is my heart. I won’t let him play around. With a deep breath, I gaze into his somber expression and meekly shrug.
“Things just started. I better go. Snoopy’s coming. It’s his big return. We’ll talk about this after.”
“Zoe? Why?” His eyes glaze with tears.
“I love you, Ivan. You just took forever.”
Chapter 11
Ivan
I watch her walk out and head to the living room. She tiptoes out for my sake, but as soon as she clears the doorway, I hear her steps turn into a sprint. I’ve just told her I love her. She’s driven me to tears. But she doesn’t want to miss a fifty-foot balloon bearing the likeness of a beagle.
I hear her high-pitched cheers. Snoopy’s dressed like an astronaut.
That little jerk.
This is bullshit. She can date whoever she pleases. She’s an adult. If she’s attracted to giant assholes who feel the need to say whatever they feel at any given moment, so be it. I know this is my fault. I sat on my hands. I waited and lost out to Gus. If an asshole is what she wants, then I’ll have respect her wishes and wait out my turn. It won’t last long. He’ll fuck up soon.
What am I saying? I’ll wring his neck!
He’s two years older than me, that’s sixteen years between them. No way did he wait until she turned eighteen. He has no scruples. I’ve been biding my time, waiting her out and as soon as I turn my back, he slides into home run.
Home run?! Holy fuck, if he’s touched her, I’ll kill him.
Fine. I know. I waited longer than necessary. I can’t think straight. I just told her I loved her. And she said she loves me too. What does that mean? If she loves me why is she with him?
My heart aches. I didn’t move faster because of me, not her. I was thirty-two when she turned eighteen. It felt obscene. Lecherous. Fiendish. Sometimes in a good way, but not always. The thought of me parading around with a teenage girl felt humiliating. Like I was trying to recapture my youth. There’s no denying, I’m a hypocrite. It’s fourteen years. It will still be fourteen years when she’s twenty. Why do I care what people think? Obviously, that piece of shit, Gus, doesn’t. And now, I’ll pay for it.
I wash my face and stare into the mirror. Angry. Disgusted. Furious, I listen to the sound of my breath. My chest is so tight with dread, each breath pains me. I’m not giving up. We’re both here. We’ll be here for hours. This is a golden opportunity to shamelessly drive a wedge between them.
I’ll admit this is new territory for me. But I love her, and she loves me. He’s already a huge prick. It should be easy to bait him.
How hard can this be?
Chapter 12
Zoe
Lunch is awkward. Typically, Ivan monopolizes the conversation while I sit across the table, staring at him like he’s the reincarnation of Adonis. Not today. This time, my magnificent Ukranian is the strong, silent type. I use the term, loosely. The only thing Ukranian about Ivan is his name. He is as New York as me, except he grew up in the city while I was stuck in the suburbs or traveling the world on location.
As soon as we sit and pass our homemade dishes for sampling and consumption, Lila claps her hands and demands stories. Nothing too work-related. We all hear enough of those. While everyone digs in and tears into the poor bird, Gus offers to start. He’s a great storyteller and eager to cash in on the chance to infuriate Ivan and hopefully, make Lila jealous.
Since he and I are the only witnesses, embellishment is guaranteed.
As I anticipated, he goes with Spain, our summer holiday. Leaning into me, shoulder to shoulder, Gus chuckles as he tells the true story of our week in southern Spain. It was a quick excursion this past August, during a break from filming in Morocco. It was fraught with mishaps, but he makes it sound charming. Everyone leans in while they stuff their face just to hear him describe flamenco dancers, tango lessons, too much sangria and me chasing stray cats in Granada. Wanting to contribute, I throw in a story about practicing Spanish in Seville, learning the language of the Spanish hand fan before I slowly bring my gaze to Ivan’s dead eyes.
Everyone is laughing but him. I toss him a half-hearted smile, but he glares at me with disdain. He looks furious. I’m certain this is the first time he’s ever been angry with me.
I never knew anger could be such an aphrodisiac.
Unwilling to push my luck, I elbow Gus to shut up and pass my sweet potatoes down the row. Hands from all sides reach for them, but in a show of goodwill, I pass them to Ivan first. His face lights up and a soft smile appears. When he takes them, our fingers touch briefly and he stares lustfully, first at the dish, then at me. Then at the dish, again.
He passes me one of his muffins from across the table. It’s the fluffiest one bursting with extra cranberries. My eyes grow wide and I wet my lips when he extends his giant hand in my direction. I take it gently, letting my fingertips graze his palm seductively. Gus kicks me under the table, but I kick him back. He’s not ruining this.
“Thank you. It’s so big.” I bat my eyelashes.
He smirks. “You can handle it. Can’t you?”
I bite my lip and nod. We inhale in unison then both reach for our wine, drinking with eyes locked.
Gus is just about to say something, when Lila Sinclair squeals with pleasure over his Brussels Sprouts Au Gratin and demands the recipe. I give him a side-eye and smile. I made that damn casserole and have the recipe in my phone. If he wants it, he’ll play ball.
Wh
ile we eat, this strange dance continues.
I provocatively slide some creamy mashed potatoes in my mouth. He smiles and moans with satisfaction when he tastes my sweet potatoes.
“You outdid yourself. As always.” His eyes gleam as he chews slowly.
My cheeks warm. “Are the sweet potatoes... soft?” My breath catches. A thousand pins prick my arms as I watch his throat swallow each bite.
He shakes his head. “They’re perfect.” Our gluttonous eyes devour one another.
I reach for my wine. My hand shakes. “Good. Sometimes... they can be a bit... hard.” I gasp as the word exits my mouth and squeeze my thighs together.
His wicked grin seals my fate. “There’s nothing wrong with hard. Hard can be good.”
I cover my mouth and giggle demurely.
“You, cheap tramp.” Gus whispers under his breath.
With my eyes still clamped on Ivan, I whisper to Gus. “I need to use the restroom. I’ll be right back.”
He exhales loudly, making me turn to face him. “Zoe, behave yourself. No bathroom sex. Make him hold out longer.”
I pout. “But...”
“But nothing. He hasn’t taken you out on a proper date. Hard and fast rule. He doesn’t come, until he feeds you.” He narrows his eyes and points an accusatory finger.
“What about the muffin?” I ask, sadly, knowing he’s right.
He cocks his head. “No.”
I slump in my chair and toss my napkin on the table. “Fine. But just him, right?”
Chapter 13
Ivan
This is a first. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten hard on Thanksgiving. Not this hard. I’m usually too full.
That idiot is too busy flirting with Lila to see me follow Zoe to the bathroom. Figures. We were shamelessly eye-fucking right in front of him and he didn’t put a stop to it. I need to make a mental note not to let her offer men food. It’s too suggestive. Too primal. Her food is for me. And our children. End of story.
I give the door a light tap. It swings open.
“May I come in?”
“Is that like a vampire thing? Will terrible things happen if I say yes?” She smiles and I fly through the door, slam it, lock it and take her into my arms.
“How was Snoopy? Was it worth leaving me hanging?” I don’t let her answer. When her lips part, I cover them with mine, tasting her wine-soaked tongue, filling her mouth, exploring every part to satisfy this unearthly need I can't begin to describe. She moans and the soft sounds make my brain swim with lust.
“Ivan...“ She breathes my name. I love the sound. I want to hear her scream it at the top of her lungs when I fuck her senseless.
“We shouldn’t get ahead of ourselves. Gus is outside.” Her small hands press into my chest, begrudgingly pushing me away while her lips seek mine, greedily searching for more.
The sound of that dipshit’s name has the opposite effect. I snarl in response. “Dump him. Leave with me. You said you loved me. Come home with me.”
Blinking rapidly, clearing her thoughts, she shakes her head.
“He’s coming to my parent’s house after this. They’re expecting us. I’ll talk to him later. Not now.” Her lips move down my jaw as her kisses consume my neck and earlobe. My mind spins. The fire burning through me is instantly extinguished by the vision of that prick sitting with her parents, ingratiating himself in my absence.
No fucking way
“Maybe, I’m not making myself clear.” My hands grip her ass and lift her off the ground. Planting her on the counter, I reach for her boots and tug them both off at the same time.
“Ivan, not here!” She wiggles forward. I push her back and place a finger over her lip.
“Be quiet, Zoe. People will hear you.”
Her eyes flare. Her curiosity is teeming. Without protest, she lets me slide off her leggings and spread her legs.
“I want to see you. I’ve been itching to see you since your eighteenth birthday. Let me make up for lost time.” I bring my mouth to hers, unleashing a passion I’ve been containing far too long and glide my hand over her panties. When I feel them, I smile and groan against her mouth.
“You’re a mess.”
She nods, sucks her lip and squirms into my hand. “This is what you do to me. You always have.”
My heart melts. My pulse races. Growling, I pull her panties down in one long tug and dip my fingers in her moist folds. I spread them apart and search out her clit. My inner voice squeals with joy. She’s so drenched, my fingers slither back and forth with ease. This is a drug. The best kind. I can get as addicted as I want, and the only consequence is being forced to give her more.
My thumb swipes her sweetest spot and she hums with pleasure, pressing her forehead to mine.
Breathless, we kiss. With each twirl, swipe, and stroke of my finger, her body jerks into me, vibrating for more, begging for release.
“Ivan...” She purrs, deliciously. I’m so fucking hard, my relaxed-fit jeans are chafing my cock.
When the scent of her arousal reaches my taste buds, my mouth waters and my brain explodes. Without a second to waste, I drop to my knees and lift her thighs over my shoulders. Flushing crimson, she covers her mouth and watches me. She can’t tear her eyes off me.
I drag my tongue through her slit, then look up and gaze into those sexy green eyes, heavy and hazy with lust.
“Here?” She fakes a shy shrug. She’s not going to stop me. She can’t. But she doesn’t want me to give her a choice.
I nod, smile, and then bury my mouth in the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen. It’s exquisite. It’s better than my wildest fantasy and right here, right now, I stake my claim on it. If I had a pen, I’d sign my initials. No one else will ever come near it again.
I’m not gentle. I’m fucking ravenous for my Zoe. I lick and she gasps. She moans and I stroke, swiping my tongue against her clit until she tenses her legs around my head. When I use my teeth to graze her sensitive skin, tugging and suctioning on her clit, she slaps her hand over her mouth to muffle her wails. Winding her fingers through my hair, she tries to hold me still. The sensation is too much. But I don’t stop. I feast on her honey, gorging on her arousal until I feel her tumbling, quivering closer to her climax.
“People will hear me. We’re taking too long.” She presses her hands against the mirror, grasping for purchase as her hips buck into my hungry mouth. I’m starving for her. I’ve never wanted anyone this much. I’ve waited over a year to get my hands, my mouth on this pussy and I could kick myself. How could I deny myself something this good?
“Ivan! Oh, fuck! Oh, fuck!” She thrashes in my arms. Her wild pants silenced by the hand across her mouth. She glares at me, pleading for a reprieve but I don’t stop. Drinking every bit she has to offer, drowning in her taste, I flick her bud with my thumb and stab her pussy with my tongue. She squirms and screams in a multitude of contortions but can’t stop coming.
“You still hate me?” I rub her clit hard. Her spasms are off the charts.
“No. I told you I didn’t!” She reaches for me, but I hold her still, watching her pant and moan.
“Are you sorry?”
A guttural cry escapes her lips as she nods.
“Are you going to dump him?”
She nods again, pushing my hand away until she leans into my chest and cries, riding my hand into her fourth orgasm.
“I’ll...tell him... tonight.” She yelps.
“You’re not leaving with him.” I kiss her hard, slamming her against my chest.
She shivers, kisses me back but then shakes her head. “Stop that. You’re being unreasonable. Just because you made me come three...”
I interrupt her. “Four.”
“Fine, four times. You can’t make these kinds of demands.”
I am being unreasonable. I can’t expect her to dump someone on command just because it suits me. This is my doing. I took my sweet time to tell her how I feel.
But it’s what I want. It’s
what I need. I’m going to lose my fucking mind.
I can’t stand the thought of him leaving with her. Touching her. Holding her hand. Kissing her. Or worse! What business does he have going to her parent’s house for Thanksgiving? They’re not going to last. He’s a temporary distraction. What Zoe and I have is real.
She loves me. Not him.
“Baby, I’ll go with you. Start an argument with him. I’ll take you to Tarrytown.” I plead and brush her hair off her face.
She runs her hands down my chest and plants a quick kiss on my heart.
“Later, Ivan. I promise. I’ll text you tonight.”
“But, baby...” I attempt to bring her hand to my rock-hard erection.
“No. We’ve been here too long. Go first. This looks suspicious.” She winks and opens the door, pushing me out.
Goddamn it. My balls are on fire.
Chapter 14
Zoe
Oh my god. While people were giving thanks in the other room, Ivan was stuffing his face with my pussy.
I cover my mouth and giggle. I wish I could call someone and tell them. But who? Shut-up, Zoe. First time someone goes down on you and you can’t wait to kiss and tell.
Four orgasms in ten minutes? That’s newsworthy. I can’t keep that to myself.
But it wasn’t just someone. It was Ivan. Ivan Pavlenko. The only man I’ve ever loved. The man I believed would never love me in return. But he does. He loves me. I exhale and sigh. He’s so beautiful. And he wants me to dump Gus immediately.
I laugh and I snap my fingers. “Done.”
But I need to go along with it for today. I can’t confess I’m lying so soon. I’ll look like the lying liar that I am. Nothing good can come from it. He can wait one day for me to dump my pretend boyfriend for him. I waited all year for him to make a move. A little patience is in order.
