Outside, trucks were lined up and waiting. Scarlet followed the nurse in front of her and climbed into one of the trucks, hauling her things and thinking for the hundredth time how she’d taken for granted having someone to carry heavy things for her in the past. But she was also becoming more aware of just how fortunate she’d been, and what a sheltered life she’d led. If she’d followed her parents’ instructions she would have been hidden from the worst of the war, denied the opportunity to help like this. Thomas had been the original reason she’d signed up, but her resolve to help had strengthened with every day of training. Whether or not Thomas would have approved of her leaving home to nurse, and being sent away close to danger, was another matter entirely. She had a feeling that the answer might be no, only he didn’t have a choice in the matter. She wasn’t his wife yet, and if she didn’t set out to try to find him, she might never be.
Tears prickled her eyes, but she refused to let them fall.
‘Are you feeling all right?’ Ellie asked, interrupting her thoughts as she wriggled closer beside her.
‘Oh, I’m fine. Just thinking about home.’
‘I miss home badly, too,’ Ellie confessed. ‘It’s worse at night when it’s dark and all I have to do is think about my family.’
Scarlet had been so tired each night that she’d fallen asleep the moment her head hit the pillow. It was during the day that her thoughts would wander. ‘We never did write our letters to home, did we?’
‘No. We haven’t exactly had any idle time.’
Ellie was right. They’d been either nursing, learning army etiquette, eating or sleeping since they’d arrived.
The truck began to move forwards and any hope Scarlet might have had of writing in transit was dashed. ‘What will you say?’ she asked, curious. ‘I want to tell my family, aside from that I love them, that I’m so pleased I have the chance to help our men, to do something useful, and to meet so many different people. I feel like before I hardly knew a thing, and now, after all my training, I’m like a different person.’
The truck rattled along and Scarlet looked out, admiring the countryside, wishing she was travelling for a different reason. That she and Ellie were friends exploring this beautiful country, and that they weren’t about to face unimaginable horrors.
‘Why do you think they are so secretive about where we’re going to be sent?’ Scarlet asked, waving to a woman standing by the roadside. The woman had one hand to her chest, the other raised high as she called out and waved to the trucks.
‘I don’t know. Why shouldn’t we know instead of worrying?’
‘Look,’ Scarlet said, distracted at the sight of more women running down the road towards them. The trucks slowed and Scarlet realised it wasn’t just women, but children, too. ‘Are they running for us?’
‘Look over there!’ the nurse on her other side said. ‘They’re all waving, even from the fields!’
Scarlet admired all the women working on the farms, keeping the crops growing while the men were away. ‘Are they Women’s Land Army, do you think?’
‘I’m certain they are. Hello!’ the other nurse called out, waving back excitedly.
As some of the open-sided trucks slowly moved closer to one group of women, Scarlet could hear what they were shouting.
‘It’s our girls in there! Our girls are in the convoy!’
‘It is our girls!’
Her heart leapt. She didn’t know these people, but they were so excited to see them. Now she knew why they’d come running, because surely they were used to the sight of army convoys by now. She could see now that many of the older women had tears streaming down their cheeks; strong women who’d probably never shed tears so openly before were now weeping along the roadside.
‘God bless!’ someone called.
God bless us all, Scarlet thought. A thrill passed through her, but there was definitely terror building up inside of her as well. Terror at the unknown, excitement at what was to come, hope that she might find Thomas, or at least some clue to his location, and fear of what she might be faced with. Of the truth.
‘I miss my mother so badly, seeing all these women,’ Ellie murmured from beside her.
Scarlet sat back and shut her eyes for a moment, overwhelmed.
‘I miss everything about home,’ she whispered.
She reached for Ellie’s hand and the nurse beside her suddenly clutched her other hand. They all sat in silence as they eventually passed all the well-wishers, the truck speeding up and taking them closer and closer to Sussex.
Scarlet looked up as the sun filtered through the clouds above, before turning her attention to the neatly packed tent on the ground in front of her. Watching someone else put it up had looked simple, but doing it herself was another matter entirely.
‘We’re going to freeze,’ she announced.
Ellie pulled a face. ‘I know. And to think I’ll have to cuddle up to you in the night when I get cold!’
Scarlet laughed. Trust Ellie to lighten the mood when she was feeling dismal.
‘I’m not Doctor Black, but I promise I don’t snore,’ Scarlet teased her back.
Ellie pretended to swoon. ‘Oh, well if you were Doctor Handsome . . .’ She burst out laughing, but the laughter only lasted until Scarlet held up part of the tent, trying to figure it out.
‘Come on, let’s get this over with.’
They fumbled their way through putting up the tent, helped by an orderly who was going around assisting all the nurses. Then they climbed inside and hauled in their things behind them. Scarlet sat in one corner and undid the straps on her camp bed.
‘Do you think we can do anything to make these comfortable?’ she muttered.
‘We can only try,’ Ellie replied with a sigh.
‘I’d love to go exploring, walk around the farms nearby and just . . .’
‘Forget the war?’ Ellie asked softly.
Scarlet blinked away the tears that took her by surprise. ‘Yes. That’s exactly what I want to do.’ She’d been having fun with Ellie, despite the hard work and conditions, had enjoyed having a friend so happy and positive about life, but then her thoughts would turn to Thomas and she’d wonder where he was all over again. Was he dead? His body lying grey and lifeless in a ditch? Or was he alive? Captured by the enemy and facing unimaginable horrors? Or injured? Was a nurse like her, somewhere out there, holding his hand and tending his wounds? Keeping him alive so that one day he’d make it home?
‘Do you think about him an awful lot?’ Ellie asked.
‘Is it that obvious I’m thinking about Thomas?’ Scarlet asked.
Ellie nodded.
‘All the time,’ Scarlet confessed. ‘I think about him, worry about him – and then I’ll become preoccupied with what we’re doing, or talk to you and feel happy, and then when I stop, it all comes back again. It makes me feel so guilty, being happy and forgetting about him even for a moment.’
‘Wouldn’t he want you to be happy, though? No man wants to think of his sweetheart back home being miserable. He’ll be remembering your beautiful smile, the smell of your hair, all the lovely, happy things about you, if he’s still . . .’
Scarlet gulped when Ellie’s voice halted, her sentence left unfinished, her dark eyes round as saucers.
‘I’m so sorry,’ Ellie whispered.
‘If he’s still alive,’ Scarlet finished for her. ‘That’s what you were going to say, wasn’t it?’
Ellie hung her head but Scarlet shuffled closer to her in the small tent, not wanting her to feel bad for simply stating the truth.
‘I didn’t mean it like that.’
‘But you’re right, Ellie. He might be dead.’ It was a truth she had to admit, even if she didn’t want to believe it.
‘I don’t want you to think that, though. I was—’
‘Please, don’t say anything more. If I don’t find him, then at least I’ve done my best. I need to believe he could be alive, that’s all.’
Ellie lo
oked up, eyes brimming and making a fresh wave of tears fill Scarlet’s.
‘I believe in you. If anyone is going to find out where that man is, it’s you,’ Ellie said.
The sound of the bustling camp outside was getting louder, the activity of so many women setting up camp and moving around the area impossible to ignore.
‘How about we sneak away as soon as we can?’ Ellie said, rubbing Scarlet’s arm before crawling back out of the tent. ‘It might be the last time we get to have fun in a long while.’
Scarlet followed her, crawling out and emerging into the sunlight. She tilted her face up to the sky, eyes shut, breathed deep and simply enjoyed the feel of the sun’s rays on her skin. He was alive. She had to believe it, otherwise she’d fall to the ground and never be able to stand.
The constant noise of women talking all around them was overpowering:
‘Fetch water from the big kitchen Soyer stoves!’
‘How long are we here for?’
‘Someone said there’s a farm nearby offering hot baths!’
‘Did you see those new doctors?’
‘I want to go home! I can’t live here! It’s disgusting!’
‘Have you heard about the Forgotten Army? They’re stuck in Burma and they’re getting eaten alive by insects in that heat!’
It filled Scarlet’s head even though she tried hard to block it out. But then she opened her eyes, straightened her shoulders and took a big breath that filled her lungs almost to bursting before slowly letting it go. She couldn’t let it get to her. She had to push through and be strong.
‘Come on,’ she said to Ellie, who’d been standing behind her. ‘Let’s go.’
‘Matron said we should make ourselves familiar with the place,’ Ellie said. ‘They’re starting our training tomorrow.’
Scarlet nodded. ‘I don’t even want to think what they’ll have us doing.’ Doubts filled Scarlet again. Maybe she would have been better off making herself useful at home, working with the Red Cross and doing what she could on the home front rather than becoming a military nurse. Part of it was fear of the unknown, she knew that, and the fact she felt so overwhelmed to be living such a different life from that she was used to. When she’d said yes to marrying Thomas, she’d known she would lead the same life she’d grown up enjoying, that she’d be safe and content, looked after by a man who’d always shown her kindness. That life she’d kept imagining was so different from what was happening now. When she’d accepted his marriage proposal, she’d naively imagined that the war would be over within a few more months and everything would simply go back to normal. Her naivety embarrassed her now, made her wonder how she could ever have known so little. But she’d constantly been told by her father that war was a man’s business, and that it would be over before they knew it, even after all the months then years of fighting.
They wandered slowly across the grass, away from the tents, towards a large stone house where she guessed the higher-ranking military were staying, along with the doctors. She’d heard a rumour there were even dentists posted with them, and that they could be travelling with them wherever it was they were going to end up.
‘Oh my goodness, look over there.’
Scarlet followed Ellie’s gaze, seeing dozens of men hauling large tin trunks up to be painted with the particular flash that identified each unit.
‘It’s quite a sight, isn’t it?’
It was Matron speaking, and although Scarlet had found her rather stiff and intimidating back at their first lodging, the woman sounded almost motherly now.
‘Ma’am, where do you think we’ll be sent?’ Ellie asked. ‘I mean, we’re going abroad, aren’t we?’
Scarlet waited expectantly, hoping in this quiet moment between them that something might be said.
‘We’ll all find out soon enough where you’re being sent,’ Matron replied, back to being brisk with her words. ‘It’s time to get your bedding rolls and kitbags stencilled, just like those trunks. You’ll be issued your battledress by the morning.’
Scarlet looked at Ellie, fear humming through every part of her body.
‘So it’s only a question of where we’ll be posted offshore, not if ?’ Scarlet murmured.
‘Yes. Now off you go to collect your berets; the case is outside the front door over there.’
The last time Scarlet had heard from Thomas he’d been heading to France. She knew in her heart that he was still there somewhere.
Please send us to France. Please.
They made their way quietly over to the case, being amongst the first of the nurses there as they reached in. Scarlet pulled out two berets. The first was too small so she passed it to Ellie and then tried the next one on. It seemed fine, so she tucked it under her arm and stepped back.
‘We’ve been summoned to Matron’s office!’ a nurse named Holly called out, breathless as she ran up behind them.
Scarlet turned to the friendly nurse. ‘What for? We were just talking to her and she didn’t mention anything.’
‘One of the officers ran down to see her just now, right in front of me, and she’s summoning all of us!’ exclaimed Holly, breathless. ‘It sounded serious, they were whispering and Matron looked alarmed. We’re to find our way to her office. It’s in the house, through the large drawing room.’
‘And you know nothing of what it was about?’ Ellie asked.
Holly shook her head and ran off to tell the others. Scarlet took the lead and she and Ellie walked into the house. They hadn’t had a tour yet, so she wasn’t sure what to expect, but straight away she saw that it was much older and more in need of repair than where they’d previously been stationed.
Ellie tripped and Scarlet just missed catching her by the elbow.
‘You all right?’ Scarlet asked, holding out her hand and helping her friend up.
‘Tripped over my own feet,’ Ellie muttered, holding up her hand and inspecting her grazed palm.
They were about to hurry off again when suddenly Spencer appeared, a frown on his face as he approached. Ellie hovered close to Scarlet, and she wondered if Ellie was embarrassed about the conversation she’d had earlier with him before leaving.
‘Do you know what’s going on?’ Ellie called over to him.
He gave them a tight smile and came closer. ‘Matron is about to share the news with you all.’
Scarlet watched as he ran a hand through his thick brown hair. He was ruffled, she could tell. He folded his arms tightly to himself and stepped closer to Ellie.
‘What have you done to your hand?’ he asked, noticing the graze. He made to reach for her, then quickly pulled back. Scarlet stifled a smile, seeing how badly he had wanted to connect with her friend.
‘Oh, it’s nothing, just a scratch,’ Ellie said.
‘I’ll check it for you, make sure it doesn’t get infected.’ He took her arm now that he had an obvious reason to and examined her hand carefully, fingertips touching the broken skin.
Ellie laughed and Scarlet tried not to do the same. ‘I’ll be fine. You have much more important things to worry about than me scraping my hand.’
Scarlet cleared her throat, not wanting to interrupt the tender moment between her friend and the doctor but needing to know why they’d been summoned.
‘Spencer, do you know what’s going on? What Matron is going to tell us?’
He turned to her, still holding Ellie’s hand, the slight smile that had momentarily brightened his face turning down again into a straight, more sombre line.
‘I’m sorry, ladies,’ he said.
‘What is it?’ Ellie asked, eyes wide.
‘The Allies have landed in Normandy and parachuted into Le Havre.’
CHAPTER FOUR
Lucy
Normandy, 12 June 1944
Lucy couldn’t move. Her feet felt like they’d become part of the sand, etched into the soft ground. The beach was swathed in smoke, and clouds of dust billowed around her. She squinted, certain that her eyes were play
ing tricks on her and the dust couldn’t actually be red. But this was war. She was in the middle of a war zone. Any horror was possible.
She choked, the thick air clogging her lungs, making it impossible to breathe.
‘Move!’
The loud yell of a male voice close by jolted her back into action, made her spring forwards, limbs suddenly mobilised, stumbling as she carried her bag and ran after her unit. Lucy heaved, the acid burn of bile in her throat making her want to double over and be sick. But she didn’t. She kept her feet moving, kept her head down, and rushed across the sand.
If they didn’t get the hospital set up, more soldiers would die. There was no time for her to have a weak stomach. If she failed now, gave in to her fears, then she was only proving her father right, and there was no way she was doing that. Not for a second.
‘We are the 50 Mobile field hospital with the RAF,’ the same deep male voice called out. Or maybe it was someone different; Lucy’s ears were ringing and her head was spinning. ‘We need to be operational within hours, not days. There will be ambulances arriving from the front before nightfall, if not sooner. Our boys are relying on you, and we’re their only hope for getting out of this godforsaken place alive.’
Lucy dug her nails into her palms, her fists tight. She looked back at where they’d come from, saw ships pounding the shore, heard the noise level rising. Men were shouting, running, screaming. Women in battledress were moving in all directions, not even looking like nurses other than the fact they wore the Red Cross armband. But they’d been trained for this; they were working under the RAF. If they couldn’t do it, no one could, and she was more determined than any of the other nurses to prove herself.
She followed orders and moved immediately to where the orderlies had already started to set up. Working under canvas meant they could be operational fast, only they’d never actually witnessed combat, never seen soldiers with the kinds of horrific wounds she was certain they were about to be presented with. But she’d always had a strong stomach, and knew she could push past the terror of what she would see in order to do her job. It was what she’d wanted to do all her life – be a doctor and deal with wounds and surgeries, but right now she was prepared to start with being the best combat nurse she could be.
Wives of War Page 4
