by Alexis Anne
Jeffry’s jaw dropped. “Not necessarily?” he repeated slowly. “Not necessarily?”
“Hope needed to have some fun. To be a little wild. To,” I searched for the right word, “to relax. All I was to her was the dick she rode to get there. Nothing more. It was just that once. We’re friends now.” She was one of those women I cared about because we became friends.
He dropped back onto the couch. “So you’re not upset that I might have feelings for her?”
No, actually. It was the best news I’d heard in ages, not that I was going to tell him why. “You two have been hanging out?”
“Yeah. A little. Dinner, a movie, I helped her when her car had some trouble.” He blushed. “I like being near her. She’s so gorgeous and funny and real . . . in a lot of ways she’s like Esme, only she doesn’t scare the piss out of me.”
“That’s kind of important—to be comfortable with the person you’re with.” Now that he mentioned it, I was baffled by how comfortable I was with Esme, how easily I was able to betray my best friend, all because I wanted to be with her.
Jeffry chuckled. “You know what? She might be better off with you . . . if you were ever interested in dating a woman more than once.”
My focus snapped out of my thoughts of Esme and back to what Jeffry had just said. “What do you mean?”
“She’s got as much fashion sense as you do, but she’s obviously much smarter. Gorgeous, sexy, I don’t know, it was the way she asked about sex last night. It reminded me of you for some reason.”
I was practically falling off the couch from inching forward, as if I could somehow pull the information from Jeffry by moving closer. “What did she say?”
It was probably bad form to look so interested, to feel so hopeful, but I couldn’t help it.
“It wasn’t so much in the words, it was in the way she said it. As if sex were the most important thing in the world. That chemistry and pleasure were somehow fundamental to life. I don’t feel that way. I mean, I love sex, but I also love football and food. I want to have a friend and a sex life. I just got the impression from Esme she was more like you, that sex was super important.” He downed the last of the beer sitting on the coffee table and stood up. “Hey, want me to give her your number? Maybe she’d be interested in one night.”
One night. We’d already had two and I wanted more. Chemistry and pleasure were somehow fundamental to life. That was exactly how I felt.
I didn’t ask Jeffry to give Esme my number. I really wasn’t sure why I didn’t take him up on that easy transition but something told me to wait. Esme had my number. She’d call it if she wanted to see me.
What I discovered over the course of that conversation with Jeffry was that I wanted more than another wild night. His description of her words and my life . . . something fundamental shifted. I realized my attraction to Esme wasn’t simply about chemistry and I needed time to figure that out.
But I didn’t expect yet another unusual invitation from Edmund Brown or for his beautiful daughter to be summoned to the party at the Renegades stadium as well.
Esme was gorgeous, as always, even in her more demure dress. Edmund brought out the black and conservative in her and while it was nice, it also masked her usual glow, made her seem unnecessarily muted. Like tucking a brilliant star behind a cloud.
We were in the season ticket holder’s suite at the corner of the stadium. Buffet lines boasted a variety of food, while waiters wandered around with trays of appetizers. Every bar was manned and drinks flowed freely once again.
Esme stood quietly off to the side, clearly avoiding her father. Her black dress swirled around her calves and the elegant lines clung to her curves. Her hair was curled and pinned, her eyes were dark and her lips were red.
But before I could move in her direction I was stopped by two of my clients.
“Yo, Mr. Hancock!” Derek Byers clapped me on the back. The man was half a foot taller than I me and several inches wider. Beside him stood his best friend and fellow Renegade, Russ Watkins, stood beside him with a wide grin.
“Well if it isn’t The Blockade.” The two men made an impenetrable wall on the field and had picked up the nickname two seasons ago.
“The new owner sure knows how to throw a party,” Russ said, sushi in hand.
“Indeed he does.” I scanned the room for my other client but didn’t see him. That’s when it occurred to me this wasn’t the whole team. It was most of the starting lineup, but not all. It was most of their backups, but not all. It wasn’t even all of the Special Teams. There didn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to who was here and that made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. A handpicked selection of players and their agents? No media. No family. “Any idea why we’re partying?”
Derek and Russ exchanged a look I didn’t like one bit, then Russ shrugged. “I think Mr. Brown just wants to get to know his best players.”
Mr. Brown. He said it casually, like he’d spent time with the owner and felt a familiarity toward him. I really, really didn’t like that.
“His generosity is my gain then, isn’t it?” It was best to play along until I figured out which kind of fire I was playing with.
“Sure is,” Russ nodded, his hands so full of food he very nearly dropped it all. “Just nod and give the man what he wants. The rewards are delicious.” And then he devoured nearly all of the food he’d been holding only a moment ago.
Did he even have time to enjoy it? Did it matter? No, probably not. Elite athletes were all energy in, energy out, like exceptionally good-looking machines.
“I find giving people whatever they want usually has consequences. That’s why you’ve both hired me, remember?” I looked at each of them pointedly. “Is there anything I need to know?”
The giant men exchanged a glance that did not instill any confidence in me whatsoever. There was something else going on here and it smelled an awful lot like an Edmund Brown rat.
“Sure Mr. Hancock. Of course we’d tell you if something came up.” That was Russ again, giving a truly unconvincing performance. I made a mental note that he shouldn’t be considered for any endorsements that would require light acting.
“Team is family, right?” Derek said. “And families take care of each other.”
“Family in spirit. At the end of the day it’s your livelihood and future on the line, not Edmund Brown’s.”
Both men blinked at me, then slowly nodded.
“Sure Mr. Hancock. Enjoy the party.”
They slid off as quick as they could, confirming once and for all that the Renegades new owner had gotten to my players with some sort of deal. He’d once again violated the regulations and was making up his own rules. But there wasn’t a thing I could do because all I had to prove it were feelings and instinct.
No, for now I needed to play my part. Observe. Attempt to earn back the trust of the clients who I thought trusted me completely. Get one of them to confide in me or somehow get myself invited into this inner circle of trust. Then and only then would I know what kind of fire I was playing with.
Of course there was the very real chance I’d wind up burned along with everyone else when this went south—and I had no doubt that eventually this would end badly. I certainly didn’t want my players caught up in it any more than I wanted it for myself.
It was at that moment that my attention was drawn back to Esme, still standing in the shadows, but now with a very tall man. Yes, my male instinct to incinerate any man near the woman I wanted kicked in, but before I let it get out of control I noticed that they were arguing and Esme looked absolutely furious this man was here. Her eyes were pure fire, the vein in her neck throbbing between her tensed muscles, her hands clenched into fists at her sides.
And the man fired right back, equally as riled up. Then he leaned down and whispered something that made her eyes go round and her jaw clamp shut.
My blood boiled. Every fiber of my being strained to insert myself into the middle of this argument
and end the man, but I had zero right to do so. Esme and I were nothing.
We were less than nothing.
We weren’t even friends. Not really.
And yet . . . my feet moved anyway. My lips and tongue formed words so smooth I shocked even myself. “So we meet again, Dr. Brown. It’s good to see you. You look lovely tonight.” I took her hand and forced a gentle handshake.
She stared at me for a moment, then fell into the part I’d just designed. “Lovely to see you again as well, Mr. Hancock. Perhaps you can grab me a drink and we can catch up in a moment?”
Blocked. “Bourbon tonight?” I guessed, rattling the ice in my own empty cup.
“Prosecco, if you will. I don’t particularly enjoy bourbon,” she lied with the most sincere expression on her face I almost bought it even though she’d enthusiastically drunk bourbon with me twice before.
I took her cue and bowed my head slightly. “Prosecco it is for the lovely lady.”
I had excellent hearing so I was able to tell that they attempted to wait until I was a safe distance away before resuming their conversation. Unfortunately for them, I heard a little.
“Do you know him?” hissed the man.
“Hardly,” Esme replied.
“That’s it—”
“No,” Esme replied firmly. Loudly. Angrily.
Who was this man? A lover? An ex? Another unsavory relative? I reached the bar and leaned against it, casually looking back in time to see Esme poke the man in the chest with an indignant finger, say something, and then stalk off toward me.
I quickly ordered and schooled my features to look as friendly as possible.
“What do you want, Leo?”
Not exactly the warm greeting I’d been hoping for. The bartender placed our drinks in front of us and I clinked her glass with mine. “To say hello.”
She arched a perfect dark eyebrow. “Is that all?”
“Your conversation with tall, dark, and ugly didn’t look too friendly.”
“And you thought what? You’d intervene on my behalf? Or were you hoping for a repeat of our last meeting?”
My dick performed a salute at that idea. “Don’t be ridiculous. Our last meeting was a rare and special thing. Rare and special things don’t happen all the time, Esme.”
She huffed, clearly flabbergasted with me, then took a drink. “I’m not some damsel in distress who needs you to swoop in.”
“I know that as well. You have my number for when you need to be swept off your feet. Are you angry about what happened with Jeffry?”
“What? No.”
“It’s just that you’re clearly upset with me and all I did was try to lend a hand.”
She threw back her shoulders and took on a look of indifference that I really didn’t enjoy when it was directed at me. “Jeffry and I are fine. Completely on the same page. I’m grateful for his friendship and I wished him the best of luck with Hope.”
So she knew about that. They were really both very mature about it all. “So I’ll still see you at the cocktail hours?”
She nodded once. “Of course.” Then she finished her drink and turned to me. “Look Leo, we had a great time together but this needs to end now. Forget you knew this part of my life and the next time we’re at one of these parties, we’re nothing more than a man and woman who’ve been introduced a few times.”
There was a low warning quality to her words. It was the way she dropped her voice, the way it was laced with fear.
“All right, Esme. Whatever you want.” I drained my glass. “Enjoy the rest of the party. I suppose I have work to do.”
I didn’t expect her to hold my gaze after that, but she did. It caused a very strange sensation to build inside my chest. An ache that became sharp and stabbing, took my breath away. Everything about her screamed cool and reserved—except her eyes. It wouldn’t be obvious to anyone else but because I’d held Esme at her most vulnerable, felt the way she trembled when she’d been pushed almost too far, seen for myself the way her pupils dilated and her eyes filled with unshed tears when her emotions were running high, because of all that I knew she was a breath away from coming apart.
When she was in my bed I went to her, wrapped her up and held her together so that she felt safe when she crumbled. Today I couldn’t do that. I had no idea what was really going on but she’d asked me to leave her alone, so that was exactly what I did.
Chapter 11
It was Sunday and I had a house full of people. I had no choice but to throw one of my biggest and most appetizing football parties or I might never see Jeffry again. It was bribery plain and simple, and it had worked perfectly. The entire gang was there. Most I only saw from time to time but Jeffry was usually around for lunch or dinner at least once a week.
Not so since Hope came along. Nope, now he spent all of his spare time with her.
And yes, before you ask, I was jealous. He was my best friend and now I had to share him. Luckily Hope fit in with our routine and it was simply a case of providing the bait in order to lure them out of their domesticity.
“The food is incredible!” Jeffry clapped me on the back. I was in the kitchen assembling a fresh tray of jalapeno poppers, gourmet cheese, and prosciutto.
“I thought the jalapeno poppers might do it.”
“Do what?” he asked as he popped one in his mouth.
“Get you and Hope out of the house.”
“We leave the house all the time,” he scoffed.
“Really? When was the last time we had lunch?”
Jeffry grinned, his cheeks warming with a blush. “Hope provides better lunchtime entertainment.”
“Of that I have no doubt. I was just hoping that every so often you might seek alternative entertainment. Especially considering our last conversation about Esme.”
“What?” he scrunched up his face in the universal sign of confusion.
“You didn’t want to have sex with her. You explained that you wanted sex and friendship. You said that sex wasn’t fundamental to life.” For fucks sake I could recount his speech word for word. It had been playing in my head on repeat ever since.
“Yeah, well, I also said I loved sex, if you remember. I just approach it differently than you do.” He shrugged. “And for the record, just because we’re together all the time doesn’t mean we’re fucking all the time.”
I must have looked confused because he laughed.
“What?”
“You might be the master of the bedroom. You might even be the pussy whisperer. But you, my friend, are clueless when it comes to relationships.”
That sounded like a compliment but I had a feeling it wasn’t intended that way. “Well since I have no interest in relationships I guess I’m doing okay.”
He laughed harder, shook his head. “Oh man. I should yank the bathroom mirror off the wall and bring it in here so you can take a good hard look at yourself.”
I straightened up to my full height. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“No interest in relationships? Says the man who put on a football party to get his friends to hang out with him? Man, you love relationships. Carefully curated ones, sure, but your friendships? They mean a hell of a lot to you, Leo. You might not see yourself tied down in a regular one-on-one situation with a woman, but I’ve got a newsflash for you—you’re in a lot of relationships.”
“That’s—that’s not the same thing!” I sounded pathetic even to myself.
“It’s exactly the same thing. Face it; if I were an attractive woman who needed sex the same way you do, you would have married me. You like to talk to me. We hang out comfortably. You miss me when I’m gone.” He batted his eyelashes.
“Fuck off.”
“Hand me the tray and I will.”
So I handed my best friend-slash-asshole the tray of food and waited until the kitchen door swung shut before I started sulking.
Marry Jeffry? Preposterous. Sure he was my favorite pain in the ass, and yes, I did miss him enough to
spend a small fortune on snacks, but the idea of him as a woman?
No. Just no.
I grabbed my beer and chugged, tossed the empty in the recycling and retrieved another, attempting to scrub my brain of the image of Jeffry in red lingerie, prancing around my bedroom.
It was possible I was going to be scarred for life.
“Mind if I join you?” Hope’s husky voice called from the back door.
I was enjoying a moment of peace on my back deck, looking out at the old oaks and pines that lined my small yard. The crickets were humming as evening approached and I’d found that I looked forward to their nightly music.
“Of course. Grab a chair.” I waved at the matching Adirondack beside me.
“It’s a hell of a party, Leo. What was the occasion?”
Had Jeffry sent her out after me? “No occasion.”
“I enjoy eating your food and watching football on your enormous television as much as the next guy, but you went all out and, call it my news producer instinct, but I feel like there’s a reason.”
She sounded genuinely curious. Maybe Jeffry hadn’t sent her after all.
“I wanted to have a nice afternoon.”
“It was very nice.” She sat quietly, and then, “Jeff said you were okay with us dating. You mean it, right?”
I took her hand in mine and gave it a comforting squeeze. “I’m thrilled, Hope. I think you two will be good for each other. Just maybe, don’t forget about me?”
“We wouldn’t dare. It’s just that early stage where everything is so new and exciting and . . . I don’t know . . . right. We want to spend every moment we can together because there’s no one else we’d rather be with. Even you.”
“I’d rather you kept me out of your bedroom.”
“Exactly. So until we calm down and get used to the idea neither of us are going anywhere, you’ll simply be forced to lure us out with football and food.”
“That I can do.” I looked her over. There was a glow about Hope. She never seemed to stop smiling. Everything about her exuded comfort, peace, and happiness. “This is it, isn’t it? You’re in love with him?”
