by CW Ullman
The night came and they walked along a path holding hands. She had so much to tell him: the trip to Ho Chi Minh City, her parents passing, and her feelings. She sat with him under a tree as the full moon cast its light upon the meadow in front of them. She started to speak, but he put his finger to her lips to quiet her. He lightly touched her face and her eyes closed. He traced her ear and then kissed it. He pushed his lips into her hair and kissed her head. He turned her face to him and while they kissed, she stretched out on the grass. My Ling had imagined this moment of him taking her as she pulled him on top and held him. Cin pushed his mouth into her neck and the sensation created goose flesh. She pulled at his belt and released his garments. He found her buttons and undid them. He gently introduced himself inside her, and she grabbed his hips and held them to her. She raised her pelvis and undulated her hips up as he rolled deeper into her. He put his arm under her waist and held her tight and she whispered, “Anh yêu em, em yêu.” (I love you, sweetheart.) She cried as she repeated over and over her love for him.
When their consummation was complete, she nestled under his arm with her head resting on his chest and listened to his beating heart. Her arm was draped across him and calm enveloped them both as they lay side-by-side. This wonderful moment signified the start to her new life. My Ling imagined a future full of possibilities built upon this union. As she rested her head upon him, a feeling of ‘home’ came over her. During the last five years she had been trying to get home and now she felt she had arrived.
Cin was holding the woman he had wanted for years and this moment had been his motivation to survive the attacks and endure the pursuits since he had left her. To declare his love for her, and have her know it, was the reason he had to come back. He had to see her, he had to hold her, and he had to love her.
Cin had been losing the emotional connection to a meaningful life in the years following his decision to make a stand for his people. When he began, he was angry and just wanted to inflict damage upon the Vietnamese who mistreated native people and the communists who overran his country. He was angry with the lot Montagnards were forced to endure. Now in the arms of this woman, his anger began dissipating.
All of his raids, attacks, skirmishes, and forced marches from danger had not changed the conditions for his people. The vicarious joy the Montagnards derived from Cin’s efforts did not motivate them to rise up; they only cheered. While his status may have grown and his name elevated to mythic levels, it had not altered anything for the Montagnards. He had not known what to expect when he had started his campaign, but he did not think that four years later he would be the only one driving it. He was growing tired and was running out of sanctuaries in which to hide. He could see in the men that had been with him from the beginning that they were doing this for him. The many years of fighting, running, and hiding were taking a toll on them. Thanh asked him the question that many of them had been thinking for some time, “What are we doing?”
They had lived in caves, tunnels, jungles, and vacant pagodas. Obtaining food, supplies, and munitions grew increasingly difficult. As his raids went on and the tide did not turn for Montagnards, he realized he was not doing all this for vainglory. What aided in his decision to stop was he did not like what he was seeing in some of his younger recruits who were turning into the thing he was fighting. They identified more with the raw power of guns, but not changing Montagnards’ lives. Cin’s army was becoming a gang and it was populated with teenagers who were beginning to act like the Khmer Rouge. The newer soldiers saw themselves in the “legendary” army of Colonel Cin and that their guns entitled them to a status that Cin never unintended. Cin’s older soldiers, all military veterans of many campaigns, were frustrated with the lack of discipline and cowboy antics of the new recruits. While he may have been a household name in four countries, Cin was mired in the futility of it all.
The last skirmish his army fought was in western Cambodia against the Cambodian military. The People’s Army of Vietnam spent a year looking in earnest for him. The Army devoted a battalion to the search. Cin and Thanh had been able to create a ruse that they were killed in the fire fight with the Army of Cambodia on the Thai-Cambodian Border. It was at this time Cin gave his horse to a stable in Thailand. After Cin stopped the raids on military outposts, he took advantage of a new moon and travelled undetected to the northeast. Once they found a suitable jungle hideout, they stowed their weapons and spent weeks just fishing in the rivers. Cin’s marauders stayed out of sight in the southern jungles of Laos, but continued to gather intelligence on Hanoi’s army.
After six months in Laos, they burned their uniforms, changed into civilian clothes and snuck back into Vietnam, armed with light weapons in case gangs attacked them. Once in Vietnam, he told the younger soldiers to go home, collected their weapons, and wished them luck. The older men who had been with him from the beginning went back into to the mountains near Pleiku and waited another year. Then some journeyed back to Thailand, sought political asylum at the U.S. Embassy in Bangkok, and were flown to America so they could reunite with their families. Even though the Hanoi military was not looking for Cin, he remained a wanted man.
Cin and My Ling fell asleep under the stars and were awakened when the overgrown cub tried to lie down in between them. If Cin and My Ling were in love, Elvis was in heaven. These were the two people in the world he adored and being between them was pure bliss. While stroking Elvis’s stomach My Ling had a question.
“Where are Mr. Pok and Bi’ch?”
“They were killed by the Khmer Rouge. We took them around with us for a couple of months, but there was going to be a mutiny amongst my men if we didn’t get rid of Bi’ch. She complained about everything and whined,” he accentuated “whined.” “We’re on the run from half the planet and she’s complaining about not having bathed in a week. None of my men had bathed in a year. After we released them, word was that when they got back to their compound, Khmer Rouge were waiting for them. Thanh’s theory is the Khmer Rouge couldn’t take listening to her.”
My Ling considered Huyen’s caring for Bi’ch. She knew Huyen held out hope of going back to the compound and taking care of her. My Ling recommended, “Don’t say anything about this; especially to Huyen because she had a relationship with Bi’ch.”
Their eyes lingered and before they got up to leave, their hands found each other and they made love again although this time it was more difficult. If they were going to wrestle, Elvis wanted in on that. My Ling would push him away and Elvis would come back and burrow his head between them. They gave up and went back to the mission.
CHAPTER VII
Cin surprised My Ling on one of their walks when he told her he wanted to get married. She asked to whom.
She had been waiting for this proposal, because it provided the opportunity for her to get even with him. After he asked for her hand, she hounded him the rest of the day to have a huge ceremony. She wanted to invite all her relatives from Ho Chi Minh City, tribal leaders from two countries, and all the men in his old army unit. She wanted an expensive wedding dress and ride in on a white horse. All the girls in the orphanage would need new dresses and she wanted Elvis and Long in the ceremony. She insisted that it be published in the local newspaper and that there be enough food for a five hundred people.
Cin, who wondered where My Ling was from because of her amazing abilities, now wondered where she was from for her grandiose desires for a ridiculously large wedding. She hammered away at him into the night until he said maybe having a wedding was a bad idea. Then she cried faux tears and ran out of the hut. He sat alone for a few minutes thinking he had been rash and exited the hut to find My Ling to apologize. When he came outside she was laughing with Dao and Di.u.
“That was easy,” she kidded.
He ran after her, because he had fallen for her ruse. He had to stop however, because Elvis joined in the pursuit and when the big cat got excited he liked to tackle people.
A week later they had a c
eremony with just the people in the orphanage. The little girls wore flower crowns and Elvis carried long on his back. Thanh was best man and Trieu was My Ling’s maid of honor. Tuyen Mam officiated. That night My Ling and Cin stayed at a local inn.
A month later she threw up. Her stomach had ailed her for a few days and she wondered what she had eaten. Tuyen and Trieu sat on her bed and told her what they thought.
“You’re pregnant,” Trieu offered.
“Really?” My Ling was stunned.
“When I was pregnant with Tu, I felt the same way. It’ll probably last two more months and then you’ll be fine,” Trieu explained.
She sat up and felt slightly better. She moved to a chair and Trieu combed her hair.
“When I was pregnant, Mother used to do this and it made me feel better,” Trieu explained. “When I’m done, you should tell the colonel.”
When My Ling’s stomach settled down, she donned a non la and looked for Cin. She found him down in the field with Dao, Di.u, Tu, and Elvis trying to teach the big cat to retrieve a stick. It was not working. Elvis chased after the stick, then after birds, lizards, field mice, and butterflies. Once he wandered off into a herd of banteng and the bulls scared him off when he tried to play with one of the calves.
A frustrated Colonel Cin yelled at Elvis, “I’m getting you a skirt.”
My Ling caught up to them and watched the fruitless exercise of trying to teach Elvis to retrieve anything.
“If you’re trying to get him to bring back an item, you pretty much need to stick it in his mouth and lead him back to where you want him to drop it. He doesn’t get it.” She turned to the girls and asked,” Will you girls go back to the house; I need to speak with the colonel alone.”
After the girls left, she kissed Cin and held his hand, “I have some news.”
“Don’t tell me, let me guess.” He joked, “We’re going to barbecue Elvis?”
She smacked him, shook her head and said, “It’s not about Elvis.”
“I give up,” he sighed.
“I’m pregnant.” She laughed then he picked her up and spun her around until she made him stop.
“You’ve got to go easy, I have morning sickness,” she cautioned.
“This is the best news, Tiger Girl,” he gushed. They walked up the trail together and just before they got to the orphanage, he could not resist, “Who’s the father?” She smacked him again.
As weeks turned into months, My Ling’s abdomen grew . She and Cin walked in the meadow daily and doted on one another. Finally, on January 31, 1981, My Ling went into labor. A village midwife was in attendance to aid Tuyen and Trieu in the delivery of a baby girl. An anxious Cin was finally allowed to come in and hold the baby. He and My Ling were both surprised by his reaction. At the sight of his daughter, he cried. Cin had never been so touched as the moment he first held his daughter. My Ling estimated him to be the most formidable and rugged person she had ever met, and to witness him reduced to tears while cradling the baby, made her cry. To see him this vulnerable and tender with their child in his hands erased the pain she had endured for the last six years. When she saw Trieu crying, My Ling wished that their parents were still alive to share this moment.
When all were composed, My Ling asked Cin if he had thought of a name.
“Tiger Cub?”
She smacked him. “I thought we could make that her middle name,” she rejoined.
The colonel turned serious and stated, “There’s only one name for my daughter. It is the name of the person I respect most in the world, the person that has the biggest heart, the most courage, the greatest compassion, and the one who has given me the most joy: My Ling.”
It was the first time she had heard him say her name. It was also the first time Trieu and Tuyen had heard it. The admiration in his voice as he pronounced “My Ling” brought all the women in the room to extended sobs. They collected around the bed while My Ling held her baby and Colonel Cin held them both.
When My Ling was strong enough to get up, she, Cin, and the baby went down to the meadow to find Elvis. He was trying to chase down a flock of butterflies when they called to him. He sauntered over and they hummed Adoration as he sniffed the crying baby.
“You protect her, Elvis,” My Ling ordered. Elvis sat on his haunches and stretched out his front legs. My Ling held the baby in front of him and let him smell and lick her.
After a few minutes, the colonel and My Ling were joined by Huyen and Dao. They walked down the hill to the highway to get supplies for the orphanage. Cin wore a non la, because he suspected his face was still recognizable to many. As they were standing outside the store, a group of Montagnards from the Jarai tribe walked along the highway. He lowered his brim to hide his face. The Jarai were about fifty yards passed them when a jeep with four soldiers pulled alongside the Jarai. They started harassing the native people using racial slurs. My Ling saw Cin’s body flex. His arms felt like rods. His fists were clenched and his jaw rippled with tension.
“Hey, hey, listen to me,” she commanded in a whisper, as she grabbed his arm. “Let it go. They’re asses and all that’s going to happen is you’ll get arrested.”
Cin’s eyes were exposed just below the brim of the non la as he burned with rage.
“You’re going to cause trouble,” she urged. “Besides, look.”
My Ling nodded in the direction of three unsavory-looking characters.
“You know they’re bounty hunters and you know they’re looking for you,” she finished.
The radio in the soldier’s jeep squawked and one of the soldiers answered it. He told the driver to go and as they were leaving, a soldier pulled a bag of rice out of a woman’s arms, spilling it on the ground. The soldiers cackled as they sped off. My Ling and Dao went to the woman and helped her scoop up the rice. Colonel Cin seethed as he watched the jeep drive away and Huyen looked at him wondering what My Ling meant when she said Colonel Cin would cause trouble. Then she looked at the bounty hunters.
On the way back to the orphanage, Cin was quiet. The way the Vietnamese treated the Jarai with derision and disrespect was the way the Montagnards had been treated for generations. The arrogance of the soldiers enraged him, but the Jarai’s lack of will to demand respect was almost as annoying. Cin might have ended his days as a marauder, but this sight of maltreatment was difficult for him to abide and made him want to retaliate. My Ling watched him, tight as a coiled spring, understanding his frustration. Elvis sensed his demeanor and dropped back to walk with the girls. Talking to Cin did not help when he was like this, but she had an idea what might. She handed My Ling to him and he immediately lightened up.
“My little tiger cub,” Cin cooed.
Huyen walked next to Dao thinking about the soldiers and the Jarai.
“What does it mean that Colonel Cin could cause trouble?” Huyen asked in a hushed tone.
“He fought for his people, the Degar, you know, Montagnards? And I guess somebody’s mad at him,” Dao replied.
“What are bounty hunters?” Huyen inquired.
Dao shrugged and said, “I’ll race you to the house. One, two, three, GO.” The two girls raced past My Ling and the colonel and incited Elvis to run with them.
“You going to be all right?” My Ling asked.
“Old habits die hard,” Cin answered.
Once back at the orphanage, Huyen’s curiosity was not satisfied so she found Tuyen and asked her the same question she had posed to Dao.
“Well, the colonel has always been good to us. We think of him as a saint because he helps the orphanage. Ever since the Americans left we have struggled. Colonel Cin brings us food and supplies,” Tuyen had side stepped the question. “You girls wouldn’t eat if it weren’t for him and his men.”
Huyen had not adapted well to the orphanage. She taunted many of the girls. On more than one occasion Di.u asked Dao to tell Huyen to stop. The death of Huyen’s mother still troubled her and she continued to believe that My Ling was somehow com
plicit. She had always been jealous of My Ling and now with the birth of her daughter and all the attention she garnered, Huyen was even more annoyed. Her resentment lingered beneath the surface. She thought the other girls were granted more privileges than she was because Tuyen and My Ling did not like her. When she would bristle about it, the two women would tell her they felt the same towards everyone there, but she did not accept it. She knew they pretended to show affection but did not really like her. She attempted to turn other girls against Tuyen and My Ling, but the girls thought Huyen was mean, so they tried to avoid her.
Cin was surprised when some of his men came to the mission for a visit. They planned to ask him to come with them to Thailand. The remaining old guard, who fought alongside Cin with the Americans against the communists, were going to America. Their experiences with the new Vietnam were the same as the old Vietnam. There was no difference in the race relationships. Montagnards were still treated deplorably by at the Asian Vietnamese. Some of the men had relatives in America who wrote letters telling them that while it was not perfect in North Carolina and Arkansas, where many Montagnards had settled, it was better than Vietnam. Instead of the American government trying to get rid of them, agencies were assisting their resettlement. Some of the Montagnards had established businesses in America and achieved success not imagined in Vietnam. Most compelling to the warriors was that they would not be wanted men in America.
My Ling listened and immediately liked the idea. She knew if they were to go, it would have to be Cin’s idea. Starting a new life in America would be what she thought her parents would want for her. If Cin agreed, My Ling would bring Trieu and Tu and they could live together and create a life there.
