Vijay interrupts himself and suddenly looks embarrassed. I know what he’s thinking and what he’s about to say.
“I, um, Siri… I’m not asking you to do this because you’re a victim, but quite simply because you’re a hell of a good psychologist and psychotherapist. You and Aina, you’re good. Damn good.”
“But the fact that I was the victim of violence in addition to being a psychologist and a therapist, maybe that doesn’t hurt?”
I study Vijay, watch him weighing the various alternatives. I know him well enough that I have some idea what he’s thinking. Tell it like it is or smooth it over? Pretend like nothing happened and that I’m the same person I was before or concede that what happened, the fact that another person tried to kill me, actually changed who I am?
“Does it bother you?” he asks.
He looks vulnerable and anxious. I contemplate his question, whether it bothers me that Vijay thinks that my personal history makes me better suited than someone else to do this job. And I realize it doesn’t. My personal experiences are still with me, but they don’t hurt anymore. It’s no longer an open wound. I think I actually have control over my reactions and my ability to relate to what happened.
“No, it doesn’t bother me.”
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Some Kind of Peace: A Novel Page 30
