by Francis Ray
“Aren’t you going to ask?” she questioned. Her voice carried a note of irritation. There was no reason to explain further.
His gaze flickered over her, detached and clinical. “Third-degree burns on the left side of your torso and upper thigh. Extensive skin grafts from your right leg.” One hand motioned toward her. “It would be my guess that you were swimming to keep the full range of motion in your left arm.”
He’d said it so clinically, so remote, but at least there hadn’t been revulsion in his face or in his voice. Even a coworker had stared transfixed last week when Sabrina had taken off her jacket. Underneath had been a sleeveless blouse. Sabrina had slipped the jacket back on.
Yet, for some odd reason she was beginning to feel uneasy with him looking at her. She wrapped the large towel beneath her arms, and used a hand towel to partially dry her hair and keep water from dripping in her face. “Why are you here?” she repeated.
“To find out how we can work together without the conflict,” he told her.
“I’m not sure that’s possible,” she said honestly.
“I refuse to believe that.” He took a step toward her. “Surely we can find common ground.”
She studied the narrowed, determined eyes. He probably wore the same expression when he was in surgery. He didn’t have to come. One word from him and she’d probably have to look for another affiliate. “Why don’t you just report me? The board thinks you walk on water.”
“One, I fight my own battles. Two, although you’re misguided, you care about patients. Since we have a common goal, there should be no reason we can’t have a respectful working relationship.”
“Why bother?”
Annoyance flickered in his beautiful black eyes and across his handsome face, then it was gone. His other hand came out of his pocket. “Conflict is counterproductive. I prefer working in a calm environment.”
Sabrina wrapped the small towel around her neck and continued to study him. Her scars didn’t bother him. She wondered what did. “Have you had this conversation with anyone else at Texas?”
One eyebrow lifted in annoyance. “It hasn’t been necessary.”
Sabrina smiled, feeling a small amount of pleasure that she was the only one at Texas that got to the great Cade Mathis. Seems he did notice her—if only that she annoyed him.
“I see nothing laughable about this,” he said, clearly ticked.
Sabrina’s smile widened. “I’ve never seen you smile or laugh.”
“What? What has that got to do with our discussion?”
Everything, she thought, but this time she kept her thoughts to herself. “You are pragmatic and straightforward. You point out the risks. I look for the endless possibilities, for the positives. Like having you for a surgeon.”
“I don’t walk on water,” he said, as if the very thought irritated him.
No one could say Cade Mathis was egocentric. “No, but you’re a hell of a doctor. You fight for your patients, you just don’t always fight with them.”
“I don’t have time to pamper them like you do,” he said. “Mrs. Ward is a prime example. Letting her postpone the surgery without pointing out the risk would have been negligent of me.”
Sabrina thought of pointing out that he hadn’t had to scare her, but then perhaps he had. “Dr. Mathis, you have your ways and I have mine. I’ll promise to try and see your point, if you’ll agree to try to see mine.”
“There’ll be no more confrontations?” he asked, staring intently at her.
“I’ll do my best,” she told him.
He didn’t like the answer. She could see it in his clenched jaw. She smiled inwardly. Who would have thought it, that she was the one person Cade Mathis couldn’t ignore.
“I don’t want to have this conversation again,” he said.
She tossed the towel on the chaise and folded her arms. “I wouldn’t bet on it, but just remember, we’re on the same side.”
“Good-bye, Ms. Thomas.” He turned.
“Sabrina.”
He glanced around at her. His expression was stoic.
At that moment, she decided that she’d see him smile. “Since we’re going to have a better working relationship we shouldn’t be so formal, don’t you think?”
“Something tells me it doesn’t matter what I think,” he said, and kept walking.
Sabrina smiled, then laughed. “You might be right.”
* * *
“Did she pay you for the painting?”
Kara signed inwardly, and fought to be patient with her mother, but it was becoming more and more difficult. Nothing Kara did pleased her, but at least she hadn’t started in on her the moment she got home. “It was a gift, Mama. Sabrina is a friend.”
Her mother, sitting at the small table in the kitchen, tsked and punctuated the remark with a thump of her cane on the tile floor. “If she was a true friend, she wouldn’t take advantage of you.”
Her back to her mother, Kara continued stirring the shrimp in the skillet. Reasoning with her mother had always been challenging. Since the death of her father eighteen months ago, it had become impossible. Hazel Simmons had been pampered and sheltered by her husband of thirty years, her every wish granted. She was angry that he had been taken away from her, angry that she had to do with less since his death. In return she made life miserable for everyone around her.
“She’s coming over for dinner in a bit,” Kara said, steeling herself for the disapproval.
She didn’t have long to wait. “Shrimp is expensive.”
“Mama, we aren’t so bad off that we can’t invite a friend over for a meal.” Kara set the sizzling shrimp aside and faced her mother. “I enjoy cooking and having friends over.”
“Then invite Burt.”
Kara shoved her hand through her hair. Her romance with Burt Collins, an internist at Texas, had lasted only three weeks. “Burt doesn’t want to be here any more than I want him here.”
Her mother pushed herself up on her cane. “He would be if you weren’t so hard on him. You could take him back, and we wouldn’t have to watch every dime.”
Money. It always boiled down to money. Their father had worked hard, but he hadn’t saved very much. The money from his life insurance policy had barely paid for his medical and funeral expenses. Near the end of his lengthy illness, he had worried about his wife more than himself. Kara had assured him she’d take care of her mother. She’d known it wasn’t going to be easy when she moved back in, but she hadn’t realized how demanding it would be.
“Men are entitled to sow a few wild oats before they get married,” her mother said. “Take him back.”
Kara cursed the night Burt followed her home after she caught him and one of the nurses at the hospital on the couch in the doctors’ lounge. The betrayal had slapped her hard. She’d thought Burt was “the one.” He’d proven her wrong. Worse, many of the staff members at the hospital knew it.
“Burt and I are over, Mama,” Kara told her, and turned back to the stove to check the boiling pasta. “I could never forgive a betrayal.” She didn’t add, especially not when she was subjected to the smirk of the nurse she’d caught him with each time they saw each other in the hospital. Thanks to an understanding supervisor, she didn’t have to work with any of Burt’s patients.
“You’re making a mistake, but it won’t be your last,” her mother said sarcastically.
Kara felt the sucker punch to her soul, as her mother had intended. No matter what, she’d never been able to please her. The more she tried, the more she failed.
The doorbell rang. Her mother’s lips pressed together as she stood. “It’s time for my stories.”
“I’ll bring your tray to your room,” Kara said, well aware her mother would hear the relief in her voice and annoy her further. Her mother kept walking. Shortly, Kara heard the simultaneous close of the bedroom door and the doorbell.
Shaking her head, she went to the door and opened it. Seeing the beaming expression on Sabrina’s fac
e for some odd reason made Kara want to cry.
“What’s the matter?” Sabrina asked, stepping inside and closing the door after her.
Kara shook her head and willed the useless tears not to fall. “Nothing. Dinner is ready.”
Sabrina glanced down the hallway leading to the bedroom. “Is there anything I can do?”
“You’re doing it.” In the kitchen, Kara drained the pasta.
The loud pop of a cork sounded in the room. “You look like you could use this.” Opening the cabinet, Sabrina picked up two wineglasses, filled one and handed it to Kara, then inhaled over the skillet. “Smells delicious. I told my mother this morning that, if I didn’t love you, I might hate you. You do everything so well.”
“Except please my mother.” The words were out before Kara knew it. With anyone else she might have tried to retract them, but if anyone understood ambivalent feelings about your mother, it was Sabrina.
Kara wasn’t surprised to feel Sabrina’s arm around her for a quick hug just before she nudged the glass to her lips. “My adoptive parents helped me find my birth mother when I was eleven,” Sabrina said. “She was thirty-one, looked sixty, and tried to proposition my dad in front of me. She had no remorse for what she’d done to me. She only wanted money to buy more drugs.”
Sabrina took the wooden spoon from Kara’s unmoving hand and began to stir the pasta and shrimp. “I cried for days. It was my grandfather, my mother’s father, who helped me realize that I was giving more thought to my birth mother than the people who had raised me, the people who had loved me, saved my life after I developed an infection in the hospital. If Mama hadn’t been volunteering in the hospital and heard me crying, I might not be here today. Life has balances, if we look for them.”
Kara picked up the bowl of fresh-cut vegetables and added them to the shrimp. “My daddy was the best there was. No matter how tired he was or how busy, I always knew I could count on him.”
“Balances.” Sabrina looked at Kara. “I’ve had friends before, but none who understood me or didn’t freak when they saw the scars from the burns.” She grinned. “You were the first until this afternoon.”
“Who? What happened?” Kara asked with open curiosity.
“I’ll tell you as soon as we fix your mother a plate and make sure she’s all right.” Sabrina went to the pantry and pulled out a tray. “You won’t believe who it is.”
* * *
“Dr. Mathis!” Kara screeched, then slapped her hand over her mouth.
Sabrina grinned and took another bite of food, relishing the memory of his reaction to her in a bathing suit as much as the fabulous pasta salad.
“Details, and don’t leave out a thing,” Kara told her, leaning farther over the kitchen table, her food forgotten.
Sabrina was happy to oblige to tell her everything, and ended by saying, “He can’t figure me out.”
Kara laughed, then sobered. Worry creased her brows. “Sabrina, you have a dreamy smile on your face. You couldn’t possibly be thinking of acting on the attraction you have for him, could you?”
“I might.” Sabrina picked up a bread stick. “You know, I’ve never seen him smile.”
“I know you enjoy helping people, but they want help. Dr. Mathis impressed me as a man who doesn’t want or need any interference in his life. You might not like how things turn out,” Kara warned.
Undisturbed, Sabrina leaned back in her chair. “I wonder what made him so self-contained, so remote. Most straight doctors his age are married. I’ve never even heard of him dating.”
“Since he made a special trip to talk to you because he likes a calm work environment, I’d imagine he wouldn’t date anyone at the workplace because the breakup would be gossiped about for weeks.” Kara’s hand clenched on the stem of her wineglass. “I wish I had had such forethought.”
“Burt is a butthead!” Sabrina snapped.
Kara grinned. “I couldn’t believe you called him that to his face. He was so shocked, it gave us time to get on the elevator.”
“He’s lucky that’s all I called his cheating behind.”
Kara sipped her wine. “I thought I was falling in love with him. It turned out my pride was more hurt than my heart. My second mistake with a man. If not for Mama, I would forget him entirely.”
“Most mothers dream of their daughters marrying a doctor so they’ll have a secure future,” Sabrina said.
It was her mother who wanted the secure future, Kara thought, but she was too ashamed to admit that greed drove her mother. “Your mother and grandmother did just that.”
Sabrina smiled. “My brother Stephen is going into premed this fall at UT Houston. He’ll carry on the tradition. They’d all be thrilled if I was dating a doctor.”
“What? Are you serious?” Kara asked, her concern returning.
“I realize you think I’m crazy, but I’ve been wondering since he left if I might not just disturb him professionally, but on a deeper, more personal level.” Sabrina placed her fork on her plate and leaned forward, her expression determined.
“His bedside manners need a major overhaul, but he genuinely cares about his patients. He’s dedicated, hardworking, and goes to the mat for them. He’s a good man. I see him and my palms gets sweaty, my heart beats like a jackhammer. I think about what it would feel like for him to smile at me, hold me, kiss me. I’ve never been this hot and bothered about any other man. I want to see if Cade might feel the same way.”
Kara shook her head. “You could get hurt.”
Sabrina picked up her fork. “I could also miss out on something wonderful. Like you said, I don’t think he’ll do the pursuing since we work together so it’s left up to me. He didn’t freak when he saw me in a swimsuit so we’ve already passed a major hurdle.”
Kara opened her mouth to warn her best friend again, then decided to keep her mouth shut. Just because she was too scared to go after what she wanted in life was no reason to dissuade Sabrina from going after what she wanted. Instead, Kara picked up her fork. “Now that you know you have his attention, what do you plan next?”
Grinning, Sabrina picked up her wineglass. “Keep it on me.”
Three
Garbed in his green surgical scrub suit and cap, Cade went down the hall toward the OR waiting room. Neurosurgeries could be long and grueling. Things could go bad in a split second. It was his job when that happened to quickly correct whatever the problem was. On occasion that didn’t happen. Sometimes the problems were too pervasive and too dramatic no matter how skilled a surgeon, and you lost.
For some odd reason, he thought of Sabrina. He frowned. No matter how he tried to keep thoughts of her away, to keep thinking of her as just the patient advocate, he couldn’t. Perhaps it was knowing that she’d suffered, perhaps it was the winsome smile on her face. Either way, since last night thoughts of her kept slipping into his mind. They would stop once he scrubbed, then he’d be focused as always. But, before then he’d talk to Mrs. Ward’s family.
He’d made it a practice early in his private career to briefly speak with the family. If things went sour in the OR, he didn’t want their first sight of him to be with bad news.
He pushed open the door to the OR waiting room. His gaze swept the room and collided with Sabrina’s. He understood the slight acceleration of his pulse and it irritated the hell out of him. His lips tightened.
Eyes wide with worry, Mr. Ward rushed to him, closely followed by several other people. Sabrina stood by the man’s side. “Is something the matter? What happened?”
“I just wanted to remind you that the surgery is going to be long. I’ll send someone out to give you an update if necessary. After she’s settled in the recovery room, I’ll come out and speak with you again,” Cade said.
Mr. Ward bowed his head briefly, then lifted it. Tears glistened in his eyes. “Please take care of her.”
“I will.” Cade felt a tug on his pants leg and looked down into the big brown eyes of a little girl. Instantly he knew it w
as their daughter. “Yes?”
“Mama said you’re going to make her feel better so she can play with me and she won’t be tired and sick all the time,” she said.
Cade couldn’t help flicking a glance at Sabrina. Adults he could handle. Children were another matter. He knew too well how a small child could be hurt by careless words, the hurt more painful than the stinging bite of a belt, the angry back of a hand. “I’m going to do my best.”
She reached her small hands up to her father. He immediately picked her up. As soon as she was even with Cade, she leaned over toward him. Startled, scared that she’d fall, he caught her around the waist. She kept leaning toward him until her lips brushed his cheek. Only then did she settle against her father, her arm going around his neck.
“Thank you,” the child said, a wide grin on her cherubic face.
Cade didn’t know what to say, so he did as he always did when faced with emotions he didn’t want or understand—he walked away. He didn’t stop until he was in front of the sink to scrub up for Mrs. Ward’s surgery.
* * *
Sabrina went back to her office shortly after Cade left the OR waiting room, but no matter what she did she kept an eye on the clock. Three hours later she was back in the waiting room to see if the family needed anything. As she’d gently suggested, their daughter Clarissa had gone home with a friend. The wait was too difficult on a small child.
Mr. Ward, arms folded, jerked his head up as soon as the door swung open. Sabrina smiled.
Blinking rapidly he jammed both hands into the pockets of his jeans and turned to stare out the window. His mother, then his mother-in-law got up from their seats to give him a hug, speak softly to him before again taking their seats. It was a little past eleven, but Sabrina didn’t think any of them had used the vouchers for the cafeteria she’d given them.
Waiting was difficult during any surgical procedure, but when you knew the odds weren’t in your favor, it was especially nerve-wracking.
Sabrina checked on the family to see if they needed anything and was met with polite no’s and shaking of heads. No one was going anyplace until they knew Ann was safely out of surgery.
