That’s good, because I don’t want a cure for synesthesia. I’m not sick. I don’t want to lose my colors. I can live with the other thing too—I have my ways of coping, like using head grids at school so I can memorize my classmates’ identities.
• • •
Dad and me are back home, painting. It’s not my usual style: we’re using rollers to redecorate my bedroom. I’m sitting down, mixing the colors we’ve carefully picked together, while Dad stands on a ladder, chipping off the stars, which never wanted to come here.
This wasn’t their home. They belonged in Plymouth.
While I was treated in hospital, Dad asked if I wanted to move again. That way I wouldn’t have to see Ollie Watkins’s and Bee Larkham’s houses every single day when I was discharged. I had a lot of time to think about his question because all I could do for hours was lie in bed and think about Bee Larkham, Ollie Watkins, Lucas Drury, David Gilbert, Dad, and what happened on this street.
I knew we couldn’t leave. I had to tempt the parakeets back with peanuts and seed. Plus, I had to stay at 19 Vincent Gardens and change the colors Dad and me have started to create together.
We both know they’re not perfect yet. They need more work, but that’s OK.
This is where I belong, where Mum’s voice found me even though she’d never visited, where a neighbor I hated, David Gilbert, ended up helping me and regretting not helping Bee Larkham first.
The radio’s pulsating bronze specks and ginger-cat button shapes, but the shades of the parakeets outside the window are stronger, more vibrant. They want to see me, so I use my crutches to get to the window. I can’t move fast, but they’re patient because they sense I won’t be like this forever. The doctor says my cast can come off next week and a physiotherapist will teach me exercises to strengthen my leg muscles.
I think the parakeets want to say goodbye to me properly this time. They’ve found the large roosting site nearby, which has hundreds of parakeets. Each day, they come back for food because I top up the feeders with help from Dad and David Gilbert.
The parakeets rise into the air from Bee Larkham’s oak tree in one giant carpet of green feathers and a musical chorus of rippling flamingo pinks, purples, blues, and exploding golden droplets.
“Goodbye,” I whisper.
They’re the most beautiful colors ever.
“Is everything OK, Jasper?” Dad asks. “Are you too tired to carry on?”
My answer surprises me. “No. I want to carry on.”
I hadn’t thought I’d want to when the parakeets left me behind, the way Mum and Nan did. I thought I’d be too sad to keep going.
But I know the parakeets will be back for food. They’ll nest in the hole in the oak tree and the eaves again early next year.
It’s a dead cert, like number one is a whitish gray color and number eight is dark blue lace.
I can wait for the parakeets to return. Tomorrow doesn’t scare me anymore.
We’re decorating my bedroom the color it should be. We’ve created the exact shade together.
It’s the only color it could be.
I press my hands against the wall by the window and feel the wet paint beneath my fingertips.
Today is the perfect color.
Today is cobalt blue.
Acknowledgments
I’m enormously grateful to a large number of people who helped me craft my novel. Big thanks firstly to my fantastic editor, Tara Parsons, who loved and championed my book in the United States from the beginning, and to the rest of the Touchstone team who made my journey to publication so enjoyable. Particular shout-outs go to Isabella Betita at Touchstone for all her patience and help and also to Michelle Brower at Aevitas Creative Management, who did an incredible job, spreading the word about Bee Larkham and gaining my US deal.
I feel immensely privileged to be edited in the United Kingdom by Martha Ashby at HarperCollins. Her insights and support have been phenomenal and much appreciated, as have the hard work of the sales and publicity teams, including Fliss Denham.
I constantly pinch myself at my luck in having the wonderful Jemima Forrester as my agent. You believed in me from day one, worked tirelessly on my behalf, and helped fulfil my ambition of becoming an adult fiction author. Thank you to the foreign rights team at David Higham Associates who have sold my book around the world, and also to Georgina Ruffhead.
I owe a particular debt to the generosity of the synesthesia community in the United States, the United Kingdom, and Germany. I couldn’t have written this book without learning from your experiences. Interviewees include the inspirational Amythest Schaber (who also helped me understand face blindness and autism), Susanne Geisler, Alisha Brock, Victoria Schein, and Julia Nielson. I was assisted by James Wannerton from the UK Synaesthesia Association; Jamie Ward, professor of cognitive neuroscience at the University of Sussex; Dr. Mary Jane Spiller, senior lecturer in the school of psychology at the University of East London; Professor Sean Day, from Trident Technical College, South Carolina, and members of his world-famous Synesthesia List, particularly Sigourney Harrington.
For prosopagnosia, I received invaluable insights from Hazel Plastow of Face Blind UK and Robyn Steward, via the National Autistic Society. Thanks also to the society’s head of campaigns and public engagement, Tom Purser, and media officer, Piers Wright, for guiding me.
I learnt about parakeets from the incredibly patient Birdman—you don’t want to be named but I’m indebted to you—as well as Dr. Hazel Jackson, from the UK’s University of Kent’s Durrell Institute of Conservation and Ecology (DICE) and the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds’s Dr. Kirsi Peck.
Artist Reshma Govindjee kindly let me mix acrylic paints with her and re-create the color of voices and screams on paper. For all things police related I was extremely lucky to be assisted by DC Karen Stephens from the Police Federation of England and Wales and the Daily Mail’s chief crime correspondent, Chris Greenwood, who also helped with court procedure. Thank you also to Tracey Puri for help with social work questions; lawyer Andrew Moxon for answering legal queries; the Royal College of Surgeons for all things bones related; and Dr. Helen Day, senior lecturer in English literature at the University of Central Lancashire, for sharing your vast knowledge of Mrs. Beeton.
As well as thanking the people named above, I should also add that any mistakes in my book are down to me. I have also used poetic licence in places.
Lindsay; Victoria; Richard; my mum and dad; and my husband, Darren, helped with early reads and edits. I had the support of other authors and friends, including Beezy; Chris; Charlotta; Faye; Sarah; Jo; and my sister, Rachel. My former agent, Ajda Vucicevic, never doubted I could do this, along with old Bristol writing pals John and Caroline.
Finally, thank you to my family: my mum; dad; Rachel; my lovely sons, James and Luke; and Darren. My children forgive my “goldfish bowl” memory whenever I’m writing. My husband has read this book countless times and makes my life complete. I’m luckier than I can ever express to have such love and encouragement.
A Touchstone Reading Group Guide
The Color of Bee Larkham's Murder
Sarah J. Harris
This reading group guide for The Color of Bee Larkham’s Murder includes an introduction, discussion questions, ideas for enhancing your book club, and a Q&A with author Sarah J. Harris. The suggested questions are intended to help your reading group find new and interesting angles and topics for your discussion. We hope that these ideas will enrich your conversation and increase your enjoyment of the book.
Introduction
Thirteen-year-old Jasper Wishart lives in a dazzling world of color that no one else can see, least of all his dad. Words, numbers, days of the week, people’s voices—everything has its own unique shade. But recently Jasper has been haunted by a color he doesn’t like or understand: the color of murder.
Convinced he’s done something terrible to his new neighbor, Bee Larkham, Jasper revisits the events of the
last few months to paint the story of their relationship from the very beginning. As he struggles to untangle the knot of untrustworthy memories and colors that will lead him to truth, it seems that there’s someone else out there determined to stop him—at any cost.
Topics & Questions for Discussion
1. Jasper believes that his father will never understand his synesthesia, how his life is a “thrilling kaleidoscope of colors” only he can see. Why do you think his father appears unsupportive of Jasper’s unique ability? How does this affect their relationship, especially when compared with the connection Jasper shared with his mother?
2. Why do you think Jasper has such an attachment to the parakeets and to birds in general?
3. The Color of Bee Larkham’s Murder presents an especially unusual mystery: the protagonist claims he is the one who murdered Bee Larkham—but this is neither explicitly confirmed nor denied until the end of the story. Did you believe his claim at the beginning of the novel? Did your suspicions shift throughout? What other characters did you suspect and why?
4. How does the out-of-order sequence of the book affect the reading experience? Do you think the story would have been weakened if it had been told chronologically?
5. “Good and bad aren’t stamped on pupil’s foreheads to help me sift through their identical uniforms.” How does Jasper distinguish good from bad in the people he meets? Talk about the qualities that Jasper considers likable and comfortable versus unlikable.
6. Jasper associated his mother with cobalt blue and Bee Larkham with sky blue. Why do you think Jasper might have initially associated Bee Larkham with the same color as his mother (albeit different shades)?
7. “I’m a reluctant witness, a reluctant helper—the roles I’m used to playing,” Jasper thinks. Do you agree? How might the accuracy of this claim change throughout the book? Can you relate to Jasper’s feelings in your own life?
8. Discuss the passage from Alice in Wonderland that Bee reads at the grave of the baby parakeet: “First, however, she waited for a few minutes to see if she was going to shrink any further: she felt a little nervous about this; ‘for it might end, you know,’ said Alice to herself, ‘in my going out altogether, like a candle. I wonder what I should be like then?’ And she tried to fancy what the flame of a candle looks like after the candle is blown out, for she could not remember ever having seen such a thing.” Jasper thinks: “I couldn’t remember Alice in Wonderland saying this. It didn’t sound significant to me,” but it clearly carries great emotional weight for Bee. What do you think it meant to her? How else might it relate to the events of the book?
9. “‘The police wouldn’t believe a word you said. You’re what they call an unreliable witness,’” Bee Larkham tells Jasper. Do you agree? How might his face blindness and synesthesia affect this—for better or for worse?
10. Jasper thinks: “Bee Larkham and I were equally guilty, but I was probably more guilty than her.” Do you believe this is accurate? Also consider discussing the Animal Farm quote Jasper cites above in relation to the book: “All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others.”
11. Near the end of the book, Jasper remembers a “boys’ camping trip to Cumbria two years ago” with his father, who calls it a “fantastic holiday,” but Jasper remembers it very differently. What does this tell you about their relationship? Is there an experience in your life that you remember differently from someone you shared it with?
12. “I realize now how much Dad sounded like Bee Larkham when we argued over my Darth Sidious rucksack in his bedroom. ‘Do it as a favor for me Jasper. Can you do that for me?’” Why do you think Jasper makes this connection? How do these requests differ in nature?
13. Why do you think Bee planted her diary in Jasper’s room?
14. Did your opinion of Bee change after learning about her history? Is so, discuss how.
Enhance Your Book Club
1. Jasper is not alone in his affection for the color blue. Maggie Nelson’s Bluets is all about the color blue, including history, color theory, observations from various philosophers and writers, and Nelson’s own relationship with the color. Consider reading this book and discussing it with your book club.
2. Look up the work of Chuck Close, an artist who, like Jasper, suffers from face blindness. Close paints portraits to help him cope with his affliction. What do you notice?
3. There’s no shortage of artistic synesthetes, including Billy Joel, Pharrell Williams, Duke Ellington, Vladimir Nabokov, David Hockney, and more. Look up the work of these individuals and research others. What do you notice?
4. A quote from Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll is the epigraph and the book is featured prominently in the plot. Consider reading Alice with your book club and discussing why you think Harris chose to include it. See if you can find more parallels in it to The Color of Bee Larkham’s Murder other than the ones explicitly mentioned. Be sure to also research Lewis Carroll; he was posthumously accused of being a pedophile due to his close relationships with young children—most notably with Alice Liddell, who inspired his most famous character.
5. Crime TV shows are frequently referenced throughout the book and serve as models of what Jasper expects to happen in the murder investigation. Watch an episode or two of shows such as CSI and examine the archetypes and roles they portray. How do they compare with the events of Harris’s book, and how do they affect our perceptions of crime and punishment?
A Conversation with Sarah J. Harris
Can you talk about what inspired you to write a story about a person with synesthesia and face blindness? What kind of research did you conduct in order to write the character of Jasper so vividly?
I’ve been interested in synesthesia and face blindness for many years, after coming across the conditions during my work as an education journalist. The central idea for the book eventually came to me in a dream: a scared young boy running across a suburban street at night, terrified by the colors he had just witnessed, the colors of murder. I carried out extensive research into synesthesia and face blindness to help me write the book—interviewing experts in the UK and people with both conditions across the world. I had assistance from many synesthetes in the United States and remain a member of Sean Day’s world-famous Synesthesia List ( http://www.daysyn.com/Synesthesia-List.html). I’m also a member of the International Association of Synaesthetes, Artists, and Scientists.
How did you choose the colors that Jasper sees for each word, number, or other element of his life—the “yellow French fries” of David Gilbert’s dog, the “toothpaste white” of Wednesday, the “bubble-gum pink with a naughty lilac tint” of sex and of course, the “sky blue” of Bee Larkham?
I interviewed synesthetes about their colors for a wide variety of sounds—such as voices, footsteps, doors closing, and birds singing—and everyone had distinct colors for the sounds. I decided to develop my own color code and make sure it was consistent, so if footsteps outdoors were dark charcoal–colored one day, they wouldn’t be bright violet the next. I kept huge grids, detailing the colors of every sound I used in the book by theme—for example, voice colors, street sounds, parakeet songs, etc.—to help keep track of them. I also tried to imagine the colors from a child’s perspective and think of words he would be most likely to use, such as in relation to foods and everyday items. To me, Wednesday seemed as fresh as white toothpaste, hope was as bright as tomato ketchup, and sex was a sweet bubble-gum pink. I imagined the barks of David Gilbert’s dog to be unpleasant to Jasper’s ears—sharp splinters of a yellow color he disliked but again, in relation to food. I knew that Bee Larkham’s voice must be a beautiful shade of blue that was similar to his mum’s cobalt blue.
This is your first story for adults, but you chose a child as a protagonist. Why did you make this decision? What was the experience like writing for an adult audience rather than a YA one?
After my dream, I knew this story had to belong to Jasper. I remembered his terror
as he ran across the street, and it felt far worse that a child had experienced this trauma than an adult. I could also see Jasper very clearly in my head, standing at a window and watching birds through binoculars, and struggling with his face blindness daily at school.
When the idea initially came to me about Jasper’s character, I didn’t know whether I would be writing another YA novel or an adult one. As I wrote, it became clear to me that this was an adult book due to the themes I wanted to develop further. It also meant that I could write a longer book than I would do for YA, and use stronger language in places, which was in keeping with some of my characters. I was writing out of contract at the time, so I found the whole experience very liberating. I could write whatever I wanted and Jasper’s story was the only one I ever wanted to tell.
Similarly, what helps you tap into the world of childhood to render such believable characters and settings? While Jasper has an unusual gift, many of his experiences feel familiar and relatable. Did any of your own memories or experiences make it into the book?
I have vivid memories from my own childhood, which definitely help when I write from a child’s perspective. I also visit schools as an author and get to speak to children and young people regularly. I could definitely relate to Jasper’s feeling like an outsider at school, as I was also bullied. In my early years, school was an ordeal and I dreaded going every day. Like Jasper, there was a bully who used to wait for me at the school gate and I used to run home to get away from him. Taking up martial arts as an adult has helped boost my confidence and I’m now a black belt in karate.
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