I realized it had been a mistake to call because I thought he’d do the talking, but he didn’t. We sat in silence, and I had no idea what to say because I didn’t know what he was feeling. I didn’t want to look desperate, like I was trying to get back together if he had moved on. Maybe it wasn’t a big deal to him.
“I just wanted to see how you were doing,” I said. “And to say I was sorry I got an attitude with you earlier.”
“I’m fine…and you?” he asked.
“Okay. How are your classes?”
“Good. Yours? Just a minute.” He put the phone down, and I could hear him talking to someone and the TV on. Then I heard a girl’s voice. Here I thought there was half a chance he was home upset over me and instead he had a “friend” over. He came back on the line, and I told him I had to go. I hung up feeling worse. Sure, he didn’t hang up on me, but he didn’t sound thrilled to hear from me either.
Rory and I ate lunch together the next day. She told me she had been in love with Tom ever since the night of the writing competition. He still thought he was better than the rest of the class, and now he’d only work with her or Darren, the ones he considered the “serious writers,” if we had to work in groups.
“I know Tom comes off kind of jerky, but he’s sensitive and deep,” she said. “He said he liked the way I tipped the ends of my hair purple. Most people don’t even notice because my hair’s so dark.”
I nodded, even though I thought Tom was an arrogant poser. Most of the guys in the class were depressing, and I was sick of hearing all the poems on death. It was more like a therapy group than a writing class. One guy had written a poem about how it would feel to be dead, and a girl wrote a poem I thought was about birds, but Rory said it was actually about suicide.
“If I wanted to deal with death, I’d hang out at the hospice full-time. I go to class to get away from death talk, you know?” I said. “I thought it was supposed to be a fun class.”
“Yeah, fun for people who like to cut themselves,” she said. “So do you like Darren?”
“He’s sweet, but I suck at relationships. I have, like, trust issues, but I don’t even think it’s just me being paranoid because both times I was right. Anyway, I do like him, but I’m not sure if I want a boyfriend right now.”
“Plus, you still got a thing for Brendon,” she said.
Margaux and I went to have coffee the next day, and she asked me to go to Lauren’s party with her. I didn’t want to spend the evening hanging out in the house of some girl who was always trying to date my ex. Instead, I wanted to veg on the couch and watch To Catch a Thief on TV. Was Margaux trying to get me out of the house to cheer me up, or was she was too self-centered to realize I was going through a lot right now just because she didn’t want to go to the party alone?
“You don’t even talk to Lauren at school,” I said. “So why would you want to go to her house?”
“Puh-lease,” she said in her annoying baby voice. For some reason, she thought it made her look cute. “I’ll do your math homework for a week.”
“You don’t even do your own homework,” I said.
“Well, I was going to let you copy Tyrell’s when I was done with it,” she said. “Please go with me? You can see what Lauren’s like in her…crap, what’s the science term? Natural habitat? C’mon. Don’t you want to see what her house looks like?”
“Okay, but you totally owe me,” I said. “And we’re doing signals. If I want to leave, I’m going to say something about having to babysit early tomorrow morning, and then we leave, all right?”
She said her brother, Dominick, would give us a ride to the party, and then we could call him to pick us up. Rory walked into the coffee shop and sat next to me at the counter. She was in a bad mood because she had seen Tom walking with his on-and-off again girlfriend.
“I think I’m going to straighten my hair for Lauren’s party,” Margaux said.
“I’m going to it, too,” Rory said. “But only because Tom’s going.”
Dominick dropped us off at the party, and the second we walked into the living room, Margaux walked over to three junior guys and started flirting with the taller, blond guy. My house was nice, but Lauren’s house didn’t just beat it, it kicked its butt and took its wallet. My house was white with dark wood, but her house was warm shades of yellow and brown. It was also spacious. The kitchen opened into the family room and living room, and even the downstairs had one of those walkout apartment things, which meant Lauren had her own little part of the house with a family room and flat-screen TV. Rory and I met up downstairs and saw Lauren’s perfect, yellow bedroom, which had a sitting room with a huge chaise lounge. It was like something you’d see in a magazine.
“Can’t you just see some actress sitting on chaise lounge, posing with, like, her journal for In Style?” Rory asked.
“Would it be weird to look in her bathroom?” I asked, peering in.
“No, but don’t open any cabinets,” she said. “I read in this magazine how some girl opened up the medicine cabinet and the owners had put marbles and stuff in there so they’d know if anybody snooped.”
Crap. I had wanted to see what kind of makeup or, more importantly, shampoo Lauren used. It irritated me that even her hair was the opposite of mine. Her straight, dark hair always fell perfectly into place and stayed bouncy. Mine was never straight or curly—just wavy, and it was a weird shade of dark brown that got a red tint from all the minerals if I washed my hair in hard water.
“Look at her tub,” Rory said. “I love these claw-foot ones. Like something out of an old movie.”
I shrugged, but I was dying inside. She had the exact tub I had always wanted. Whenever I got stressed during an exam, I’d always go to my “happy place” in my mind, which was a claw-foot tub full of warm water and bubbles. Now my “happy place” had been invaded by Lauren and her tub of evil. I decided to take a chance and opened the cabinet under the sink. No shampoo, but I did find out her “natural look” got a little help from several makeup counters.
“Look at these pads,” Rory said, looking over my shoulder. “Aren’t those for people who wet themselves? Does Lauren pee in her pants at school? Dude, I will never be able to look her in the eye now, knowing that.”
“I dunno, she could have a medical condition,” I said.
Rory moved the package, and then I saw it, sitting in the little container that held her lipsticks and compacts. There was a plastic disk, which could only be one thing.
“Oh wow, Lauren’s on the pill?” Rory said, as my stomach felt like it was dropping fifty stories.
“Do you think that means…?”
“Probably just for cramps, you know, another medical condition,” she said, closing the cabinet.
Rory wouldn’t look at me as she stood up. Was this the reason Brendon was so quick to go back to Lauren? It was like John and Brittanie all over again.
“Crap, somebody’s coming,” Rory said, pulling the bathroom door shut. “If someone tries to come in here, we’ll just say we had to pee.”
“Together?” I whispered.
“We’re super close—now shut up.”
I stood at the door listening and realized Lauren was in the room with her best friend, Madison.
“So what’s going on with you and Brendon?” Madison asked.
“I dunno. He’s being weird,” Lauren said. “He calls me and stuff, but something’s off.”
“Is he still into that Emme chick?”
Lauren sighed. “I checked his phone the other night, and her number was on it. So I don’t know if he called her or if she called him, but it was definitely her. It was probably her calling him. She’s so pathetic. I wish he’d just get her out of his system. They have nothing in common, so I have no clue why he’s not over her.”
Rory put her hand over my mouth in case I was tempted to scream. We waited five minutes after we heard Madison and Lauren leave before we opened the door.
“So he’s not her boyfriend
, and she’s aware you’re still ‘in his system,’” Rory said. I nodded, but the part about me being “pathetic” was echoing in my mind, and what I had seen in her bathroom was making me queasy.
We went upstairs just in time to see Lauren walk up and slide her hand up Brendon’s arm. Meanwhile, Tom was over in the corner with his girlfriend.
“Well, this is fun,” I said as I watched Brendon talk to Lauren. He started to walk away, and she pulled his arm back.
“I know. I want to go, too. I’m going to find Katia,” Rory said. “Come with me.” She started to head toward the hall when she noticed Brendon and Lauren in deep conversation. “Let’s try the kitchen.”
I tried motioning to Margaux I wanted to go, but she wouldn’t look in my direction, and I didn’t want to go up to her since Brendon and Lauren were over there. Rory came back and said Katia wanted to stay.
“Tom and his girlfriend are making out, and I just want to get out of here. Do you want to go to a movie or something?” she asked.
Margaux kept ignoring me, so I decided to leave without telling her. I was glad Rory had her car because I don’t think I could have stood one more minute of watching Lauren hang onto Brendon.
We went to the theater, which was filled with a bunch of little kids who were sticky from who knows what. The only movie not sold out was The Cutie Pies’ Big Adventure.
“I hate the Cutie Pies,” she said. “My little brother watches the show, and it makes me physically ill.”
“Well, we could walk the mall until the nine o’clock showing of the new Ally Patterson movie,” I said, and she groaned. “I know you hate Ally and mall walkers, but I’ll buy you some licorice at the candy store, and we can go to the bookstore.”
“Okay, but if I get run over by any strollers—”
“I’ll protect you,” I said.
We went to the candy store and stocked up on licorice ropes and gum for the movie. Then we had blueberry-peach smoothies and read magazines and tabloids until the movie started. I had completely forgotten about my problems until the grandfather in the movie was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. I wanted to leave, but I didn’t want to have to go into why I wanted to with Rory. She just sat there, chewing her licorice. I finally lost it when the old man in the movie wandered away from the home and got hit by a car.
“Hey, do you mind if we go?” I asked.
“It’s almost over,” she said.
“I know, I just feel sick all of a sudden,” I said. I got up and walked out of the theater as Ally was asking the doctor about her grandfather’s condition. Rory followed me out of the theater and asked if I wanted to stop in the bathroom before we left. I assured her I wouldn’t puke in her car, and she took me home. My dad was sitting in the kitchen when I came in.
“How was the party?” he asked.
I shrugged. “We ended up going to a movie. Any news on Grandma?”
Dad shook his head. “We went up there, but nothing’s changed. I’m glad you went out tonight.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Your mom and I are concerned over how much time you’ve been spending in the hospital and at the hospice, along with watching Grandpa, too. I know you want to be there for your grandparents, but we worry it might not be healthy for you. Sometimes I forget how young you are to go through all of this. I was in college before I dealt with anything like this, and I know how it impacted me. You’re mature for your age, but you are still a kid—sorry, teen,” he said, smiling. “You have been so strong for everyone, and I don’t think your grandfather would be doing this well without you. Still, I don’t want to put too much on you.”
“I want to be there for them, and I feel like Grandpa is calmer if I’m there.”
“Yes, but I don’t want you to sacrifice your high school years either, including homework or going out with friends. Your mom and I realized we might have leaned on you a little too much, so just know we appreciate it, but you get to have a life, too.”
I nodded, and Dad gave me a hug.
“This is your way of saying it’s not going to be okay, isn’t it?” I asked.
He squeezed me tighter. “You can always read between the lines, can’t you?”
“Please don’t put Grandpa in a home. I don’t mind sacrificing going out if it means he can live with family.”
“Honey, we’re not there yet. No decisions have been made, but I appreciate your willingness to help. Not many teenagers would offer.”
Tears were running down my face now. “Promise you’ll—”
“I promise you we will consider every avenue possible and do what’s in his best interest, okay? Because it might come down to it that staying with us isn’t in his best interest.”
I wiped my eyes and nodded. Dad went to work in his office, and my cell phone rang. It was Margaux, wondering if I got home okay. I was still so emotional from my talk with Dad, and it showed.
“A lot you care. I could be dead in a ditch since you abandoned me,” I said.
“Someone said you left with Rory. Nice of you to tell me you were leaving. Seth took me home,” she said.
“Nice of me? Excuse me, who took off and left who now?”
“We just went to get some soda,” she said.
“For an hour? Which one’s Seth? The skinny one who looks like the chemistry teacher?” I said.
“He does not look like Mr. Carpenter. Anyway, he wanted me to meet his friends—”
“While I sat waiting like an idiot? I just—you knew I was anxious about going there in the first place, and I wish you could have been more sensitive and understood when I wanted to leave.”
“I’m sorry, okay? I’ll buy you lunch at the mall to make it up to you tomorrow,” she said.
Well, I would have gone anywhere to get away from my house and all my problems. Her brother came over to pick me up in the morning. Margaux and I went to Sami Boutique’s first, and we both found stuff to try on. I called her over to my dressing room to show her the dress I tried on. She came over with her cell phone.
“I’m leaving a message for Seth,” she said.
“Do you guys have plans later?” I asked.
“No, he just wanted me to check in,” she said, putting her phone away.
“For real?”
“He likes to know where I am,” she said, walking back to her dressing room. She was acting like they were a couple now, when they had just met last night.
“So you guys are going out now?” I asked, struggling to stuff myself into a pair of size seven jeans. Why did I always try to force the issue when I was actually a size nine?
“We’re just hanging out,” she said. She always used to complain guys only said “just hanging out” if they thought somebody better was going to come along. “Don’t you think he’s cute?”
I knew Margaux needed my approval because she couldn’t go out, or “hang out,” with anyone her friends didn’t find hot. I could have ended the whole relationship there with one “Eww,” but I said he was cute so I wouldn’t have to listen to “What’s wrong with him?” all afternoon. It was just easier to go along with what she wanted to hear.
I didn’t end up buying anything, but Margaux did buy me a lip gloss, so I knew she wanted me to forgive her. We decided to eat, and she mentioned she was craving pizza. I knew she was trying to get me to go to the cheap pizza place in the mall since she had offered to pay, but I wanted something healthier and said I had been dying for a salad from Hill’s. We got a booth and ordered iced teas and breadsticks while she checked out the menu. She told me she had invited Seth to go horseback riding tomorrow and asked if I wanted to come along.
“I could invite one of his friends to come, too,” she said.
“No thanks,” I said as the waitress came to take our order. “I get anxious around horses.”
“I wish you’d come. It won’t be any fun without you.” She was slipping into baby talk again. How did she flirt with guys if she drove me crazy with the baby voice? I wondered if
Seth was deaf or something.
We finished eating, and I decided to ask Margaux what she thought about the whole pill thing I saw at Lauren’s house.
“I need to ask you about something—”
“Let’s go to the candy store,” Margaux said, grabbing my arm. “I need some gum.”
While I wanted to get her advice, Margaux just wanted to talk to the guys who were in the candy store, and, of course, they came right over and started talking to her. One of the guys, Steve, said he was a senior at a nearby school. He was a little shorter, had a mustache, and was one of those guys who actually wore their class rings. Not my type at all. She was giving him her cutesy voice, which was just a step away from her baby voice. He ended up buying us gum, which made me uncomfortable, but we were out of there before he had a chance to ask for any phone numbers. Margaux was all about getting a guy to ask for her number, but she rarely wanted to date the guys. She just wanted them to ask her out. It made me uncomfortable because these guys would go out of their way for her, and I wished she just let them know she wasn’t interested. We were walking to the makeup counter at the department store when I saw Brooke, Jayson’s girlfriend, walking with some guy.
“That’s Brendon’s brother’s girlfriend,” I said. “I wonder who she’s with.”
Margaux shrugged. “Probably just a friend. What do you think of this liner? Is it too plum? I want it to be plum, but not too plum, you know?”
I said the liner was fine, but my instincts told me Brooke was cheating on Jayson. She wasn’t holding the guy’s hand or anything, but I knew something wasn’t right.
We went to a few more stores, and I noticed Margaux kept checking her phone for texts when she thought I wasn’t paying attention.
“I thought you two didn’t have plans for tonight,” I said.
“Nothing planned.” She bit her lip. “I just thought he might want to do something tonight.”
Dating the It Guy Page 14
