by K. J. Dahlen
“Did David hurt you?”
She shakes her head, her mouth opens and shuts as if she wants to say something else. “No, but can I have something to eat please?”
I nod my head. “Sure. But don’t you want to look in the envelope?”
She shakes her head.
I want to explain things to her, but she doesn’t seem interested. Maybe if I get the fried chicken that she loves eating as if her life depends on it, maybe then it’ll spark some interest. Enough to make her listen and understand how things have to be from this moment onwards. I find the chicken, and I turn to watch her.
She’s just sitting there as if she hasn’t got a care in the world.
“Have you thought about where you want to go once you leave here?”
She doesn’t hesitate in looking at me and saying, “The diner. I want to see Olivia. Talk to her. All of them.” Then she plays around with the cell. The new iPhone I gave her. She looks up at me as if she thinks that I want gratitude for the phone. “Sorry, thanks.” She lifts it up.
I just nod. This isn’t what I was expecting from her. I’ve been keeping her here for the last few days against her will. I’ve given her the chance to leave, and I expect her to be running out of the door any minute. Instead, she seems to want to stay, then again if she did, then she wouldn’t be toying with the envelope and would be telling me to take it back. That she didn’t need it.
As I hand her the plate, she laughs. “Can I take some with me?”
I nod my head and then turn to put some in a box for her to take. I look to see that she’s eating it the same way that she did last week. She was hungry, but I was sure David said that he fed her regularly. She slows down after the first one, and that’s when I see her nibbling it.
“You love watching me eat the chicken. Don’t you?”
I nod my head and then get the plate out of the microwave and join her. I sit by her side waiting for her to react to fear.
Nothing!
If anything, she acts quite comfortable next to me and then she gets up. “Can I get a soda?”
“Sure, help yourself.”
Last week, we were sitting here as if we were lovers and couldn’t get enough of each other. Now, we’re acting like strangers and as I finish my first drumstick. I hesitate about eating some more as I want to get everything out into the open including the blood on my hands. “You see it was about fifteen years ago, or so, that’s when I first met Steven. He was thrown out of his house because he was one of those guys. I thought that he was misunderstood at the time. He was older but so fucking smart.”
She nods as if she’s interested in what I have to say.
I don’t deserve her time. But I’m grateful that she’s giving it to me. “My family are a bunch of mobsters. Kill first and then ask questions later. I was part of it, and it was all good until things got out of control. Steven stepped on the wrong feet. Always flirting and using his charm to get together with women who were taken or just shouldn’t have been touched.”
She gasps. “Wow, even when he was married to my mom?”
I nod, thinking that I remember when he told me about getting married, he said that he was doing it so it would calm him down. I remember him saying it as if he was doing me a favor. I laughed at the idea of it, but I wasn’t his dad. I didn’t have time to sit and listen to everyone’s problems.
“Anyway, he seemed to calm down for a little while and then it was as if he was bored or something. Gambling, drugs, stealing. You name it. Steven was into it. And then I found out what he did with his own family. The real reason that they wanted nothing to do with him.”
She tuts, “He told us that they were all dead. That’s why none of them came to the wedding.”
“Oh, they’re alive alright. They think that he’s dead. That’s what he did to get out of the money that he stole from his dad.”
“What the fuck was wrong with him?”
I can only say what I assume is the reason for him doing it. “Some people are like that. They do things, not because they need to, but simply because they think that they can get away with it. I think that was the deal with Steven. He did it because he thought that no one would catch up with him.”
“Did you kill him?” she whispers as if she knows the fate of him before I even got to that side of the story.
“No, but he’s dead.”
She nods. “I see.”
What does she see? Because so far, she’s not saying anything. I just told her a major thing, and she’s quiet. Maybe she was suspicious all along that there was something wrong with Steven and I’ve just confirmed her worst fears. “Anyway, the thing is you’re supposed to disappear like your mom and stepsister.”
“Her dad’s dead, and she doesn’t even seem to care.”
I shrug. “Maybe she takes more after her dad then you ever saw. I just want you to know, Leah. That the money will keep coming as long as you want it to. The passport and the envelope is a way to a new life.”
Again, she repeats the words, “I see.”
“Let me know when you’re ready to leave, and then I’ll take you to the diner.”
She nods, but then there’s this uncomfortable silence between us. She breaks it by saying, “What happened to you?”
I should tell her my side of the story about Silvia dying and giving up my life as a mobster. But I don’t. I keep that side to myself as I think about the tiredness that’s slowly, but surely taking over my body. No amount of sleep will get rid of it. Just time and not an overactive imagination about what’s happened in the past, but a peaceful life as I’ll sit and reflect about my plans for the future. “Too much. And we need to get going before it gets dark.”
She gets up and starts heading out of the kitchen as if she’s ready to go. She doesn’t take the envelope or even the chicken. I know that she may not want it, but she certainly needs it. Maybe not this second, but soon.
26
Leah
I need to go inside the diner, but I’m sitting in the limo watching from the outside. I should be running inside, telling them that I’m so sorry about everything that’s happened, and begging for their forgiveness.
Everyone seems so sad, from Fred who’s slumped on one of the stools and watching his wife, Cheryl and Olivia clean up the diner.
I sigh as the limo door opens. “Here goes nothing.”
Marco doesn’t say a thing as he turns his head away from me.
David bows as I step out. I know that he did warn me of the consequences of trying to leave and I acted out on them. There are no hard feelings between us. The same as I don’t even feel angry toward Marco. I’ve realized that I’ve spent the last three years hating the wrong man. Turning a blind eye to Steven’s true colors. Ignoring the fact that he made Mom cry so many times and I’d only seen one side to the story. The one that he’d painted and I believed. That was what Hayley meant on the phone when she said that the factory had just closed down. Even that was a lie.
I wipe my palms against my legs and then as I strode slowly to the door, I’m surprised as Olivia spots me and comes running. There’s a big smile on her face as she opens up the locked door and hugs me.
“Thank God that you’re okay!” Olivia sighs as she wraps her arms tighter around me.
“You scared us,” Cheryl and Fred say in unison as they come to join in the family hug.
I can’t help but let the tears escape from my eyes as they usher me into the diner and then I turn back to see that they’ve gone out of sight. I look back wondering if Marco had just dropped me here and left without saying goodbye?
I shake my head at the thought of it. We’d not made any plans to meet up again, why should we?
He’d given me an envelope and made it clear that it was a ticket to go away and shut up. Never to contact him again.
I want to say something to him, but I can’t as Cheryl kisses me over and over again. I owe them an explanation, and I can’t believe that I was nervous about them being worried about me
, but I start to burst into tears as I realize the one family that I’ve ever had in my life may not be blood, but they care about me. Which is a lot better than my flesh and blood…who don’t give a shit.
“Wow, so all this time you just wanted to get close to Marco?” Olivia sighs as the truth sinks into all of them.
“But I did enjoy the nights that we spent together.” I can see that I’m on the road to nowhere.
Olivia looks so hurt as I tell her about the night that we met at the club. When she said that I could crash at her place and then I saw the one man that I’d been trying to get next to for months eating at her parent’s diner. The real reason why I started working here. I hated myself for saying it out loud, but I felt so much better for doing it. It was as if the burden of the lies had finally been lifted from me and I was set free.
“And your mom? Does she need money?”
Cheryl asks me; I think that she was hoping that I’d say no, but once the truth started pouring out of my mouth. I just couldn’t stop.
“She did need money, because of my stepdad and her depression, but it seems that she doesn’t need it anymore.”
She nods, but then stops as she raises the question, “Why not anymore?”
I shrug because I suspect, but I don’t know the full truth. “I suspect that she just doesn’t need it. It’s as if this whole thing has been one big mess.”
She lifts up her hands as if she’s about to throw them up in the air because she gives up. “What do you want, Leah? That is your name, right? Do you want to go back with him? Work here? Go home? What? I’m not pressuring you, but just wondering where your head’s at, at the moment,” Olivia says as if she wants us to start again. A new slate.
“I’d love to have my room back, if I can have it?” I ask as I try and put an innocent look on my face.
She grabs me in a hug, and so do her parents. Once again, I’m in a little sandwich, but I don’t feel overwhelmed. If anything, the only thing I do feel is loved. I could spend all night like this for sure. It’s been a long time coming, and I wouldn’t miss this feeling for anything in the world right now.
27
Leah
It’s been over a week since I’ve been working back at the diner. Everything seems normal again, but it’s because I’ve changed and so has Olivia.
“You’ve forgiven me, right? For being the green-eyed monster and acting like one of the jealous stepsisters,” she whispers as she stands by the table that I’m cleaning.
“Sure, Olivia. I’m the one that should be begging for forgiveness. I’m the one who lied to you. I’m the one that used you just to get a job here when I realized Cheryl and Fred owned the same diner that Marco hung out at. I’m the one…”
She giggles. “Can you stop already? Damn, we should get past this.”
I agree, “I know, but I still feel guilty, and your mom and dad have been super cool.”
She smiles as she puts a gentle hand on my shoulder. “My parents care about you. If anything, I was probably jealous that they were going out of their minds worrying about you. I don’t think they would have done that about me.”
I hit her gently; she was a melodramatic. She was their only daughter, and they loved her, that part was clear to me from the start.
My new phone starts vibrating in my pocket. I recognize the number immediately and pick it up.
Olivia signals for me to go, the diner’s quiet and we usually have a slice of pie or something at this time. Catch up on the latest morning gossip and then get busy for the lunchtime rush.
I quickly pop into the back and answer my phone, but I wish that it was someone else calling, I wish after all that had happened that it was him.
“Mom?” I say trying to catch my breath from running to the back.
“Yes, Leah. Thank God. I thought that maybe Hayley didn’t save your number properly.”
I know that she’s not calling to find out about my welfare, something tells me she’s calling for the same reason that she’s been calling me for the last few weeks only when she needed something and that something was always money.
“Yes, it’s my number.”
I don’t say anything more than this. I know that in about twenty minutes the lunchtime rush will be coming through that door. I could do with a coffee, and a slice of pie as my stomach starts to rumble.
“Good, good. How are you?” I’m just about to answer, when she doesn’t give me the chance to do so and tells me the reason for her call. “Did they contact you?”
“Who?”
She sighs. “You know the guys. The ones that gave us the money. I’m just wondering if they contacted you and gave you some too. They must have done. They wouldn’t just give it to Hayley and I. They must have done the same with you too?”
She sounds erratic, and no longer is my stomach rumbling out of hunger, but fear for my mom’s life. “Mom, what’s wrong?”
She starts to cry. “They found Steven’s dead body. We saw it on the news here. They managed to figure out who he was from the dental records because his body was pretty much smashed up and…oh, it was horrible, Leah.”
I don’t have any remorse because I knew that Steven was dead, Marco told me the moment that we talked in the kitchen. I still felt that there was more to the story, but then I felt that ignorance was a bliss at the time. He told me what I needed to know and nothing more.
“Sorry, Mom. I need to get back to work,” I say as I’m about to hang up the phone.
“Leah, did you hear what I said originally? I asked if they gave you money. I mean what they gave me is not enough to disappear. Do you know how expensive things are in the Seychelles? Too expensive…”
Before she can finish her sentence, Hayley snatches the cell and starts talking to me, “Leah, we need you to send us money, we’re nearly running out, and we need to get out of here quickly. Mom got into a bit of trouble.”
I can hear her shouting in the background, “It wasn’t my fault.”
“And we need to get out of here. You must have money, even if it’s not a lot. 10k or so will do. I mean, if that’s too much then maybe just 5k. Anything, because…”
I didn’t wait for her to finish, I knew what she was going to say next, and I don’t want to hear it. Then again, what did I expect? I don’t even know how to get ahold of Marco. Now, I have a genuine reason to do it, other than for some crazy reason wanting to be with him. I think about him all the time. From when I’m eating pie to even serving it, and at night he’s always in my dreams. His smile. His touch. His everything.
Olivia comes up to me, and I know that I’ve been standing with the phone in my hand, canceling the repeated calls that Mom or Hayley’s making to me.
Money.
That’s all they think I am. Some money tree.
“Sorry, you still on the call?” she asks.
I shake my head, this time I’m going to be one hundred percent honest with her. “It was Mom and Hayley asking for money.”
She smiles as she takes my phone.
“I thought it was him. In that case, if it’s them two. Just turn your phone off.”
I signal for her to do it.
She does it and then hands me back my cell. “Ready for the lunchtime rush?”
I smile as I wrap my arm around her. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”
28
Marco
Fuck!
I need to stop being a wimp and just call Leah. I’ve been stalking her like a fucking pervert. Once in a while, I go and stand outside the diner and just watch her finishing her shift. Laughing with Olivia as if she hasn’t got a care in the world.
I wonder if she still thinks about me? If she regrets that weekend?
I’ve been staying at hotels with my new fake ID like a fucking chump. Everything I’ve ever had is gone, even David.
The moment I wired money to an account in the Cayman Islands he was gone like a bat in hell. He didn’t want anything to do with me anymore, and simply sho
ok my hand and said, “It was nice while it lasted.”
I nodded as if I agreed with him and then I thought about our business arrangement, there was nothing nice about it. And I was relieved it had come to an end before things got out of hand.
I hardly knew Leah, but the idea of something happening to her would have been too much to bear. I’m trying to figure out what’s going on inside her head, she left her ID and went back to work as if nothing had happened. She wasn’t angry toward me, and the crazy part was when she went back to the diner her friend and her parents greeted her with open arms. Something that even took me by surprise.
I heard a few rumors that her mom is getting out of hand, getting into drugs and all sorts of shit down in Seychelles. I know that it’s going to be a matter of time before Dad puts an end to it all. The only person that will be left will be Leah, and even if she’s no trouble, Dad will make sure that she’s gone too.
I need to stop being a chicken and just see her. Tell her that she can’t just slip back to being a waitress. Her mom’s causing trouble, and sooner rather than later, it’ll catch up to her.
She doesn’t deserve it.
She said that she wanted to go to college, what happened to her dreams and aspirations?
I watch as she starts walking with her friends and starts to wonder if maybe, just maybe Leah’s found something better than a career and this is why she’s staying in the job.
She’s found love in a family, and it’s exactly what she needs, not what she necessarily wants. I wonder if that’s something worth dying for, but then again that’s something I’ve never known. A situation like this has never been an option for me. And it makes me want her even more. Maybe she can show me how to love really. Something I thought I was doing with my dead wife. Something that I found out was a complete lie.
I decided I needed to stop being a chicken and just meet up with her. I know there’s a little boat business in Mexico that I have my eye on. Something I’ve thought about for a while.
