by Dan Frey
Here is where I net out…
Our invention seems to affirm a Newtonian view of the “clockwork universe.”
One big, interlocked machine.
All the pieces, all the atoms, working together,
in a way that is fundamentally unchangeable.
Nothing can be changed by the technology we’ve created,
because only information is transmitted through time.
In order to “change things,” you would need to disrupt the machine.
Throw a wrench into the gears, so to speak.
You would need a device that lets you physically travel through time.
Which, as I’ve said before, is theoretically impossible.
Now, before you get all excited…
“theoretically impossible” does not just mean “very difficult.”
It means mathematically, it does not make sense.
It means we’d need infinite energy density (on the order of a black hole).
These are DeLorean-level fantasies.
Best to put them out of your mind.
—A
REPLY
Come on, I believe in you. And right now, we got a working product, a surplus of funding, and a guaranteed success of our first launch. We hired that Evelyn chick out of Microsoft last week, you said yourself she’s even better at CS than you—so put her in charge of day-to-day maintenance…
And meanwhile, we’ll set up a little side lab for you, some top-secret shit, and you just go in there a few hours a week, and do some Einstein magic on the whiteboards and whatnot…
I got you a little present, it’s being delivered tomorrow:)
REPLY (THE FOLLOWING DAY)
B—
Thank you for the DeLorean.
It is the most ridiculous thing I’ve seen in my life,
and I love it.
At the end of the day, my duty is to serve.
You’re the boss. The God of the Future.
If you say this is the way, I believe.
I’ll get started, on an exploratory basis,
to see if we can break the clockwork universe.
—A
CHAPTER 12
SEC FORMAL COMPLAINT—SUBMITTED JUNE 4, 2021
Dear Sirs:
We are writing to inform you that the Securities and Exchange Commission has opened an Active Investigation into the business or enterprise incorporated under the name The Future LLC.
The Future has been brought to our attention by anonymous individuals who have reported that its technology may have been used in breach of the Insider Trading and Securities Act of 1988 (Title 17 CFR 240.10b5-1).
You are advised that subpoenas of relevant information will be forthcoming, and encouraged to employ legal counsel. You are also advised that as of this notice it is a criminal breach to destroy, remove, or suppress any documentation which may be relevant to this inquiry.
Martin Sloe
Senior Investigator
Federal Securities and Exchange Commission
EMAIL—JUNE 7, 2021
From: Ben Boyce
To: Leila Keener-Boyce
Hey Princess, thanks for taking a look at this. I know I was freaking out when I called you earlier but I’m calm now, and I just want to say I really appreciate any help you can give, and sorry if it seemed like I yelled at you. I just don’t know how big this is gonna be.
REPLY
Babe, I understand that you’re feeling really triggered here. A startup is like your baby, and your autonomic nervous system is kicking in because it feels like your child is being threatened. Just keep in mind, it’s not me that poses the threat. I’m on your side.
For some perspective, I would just let you know that this is perfectly normal. About 1 in 3 new businesses go through a significant legal hurdle in their first year or two. In the Valley, it’s more like 1 in 2. The reason they’re coming after you is because they know you’ve got something big and they’re afraid of it.
REPLY
Totally. I just think, maybe your dad’s firm could be helpful? You could be the one to bring the case in, maybe he could just sign off on it. I’m gonna need all the firepower I can get to fight this shit.
REPLY
That’s a perfectly understandable response, but if you want to engage my dad’s firm, then I will likely step away from this personally. I just can’t be involved with him any more directly than I already am. All the small, subtle familial dynamics that already permeate my work life would only be cranked up to 11 if you were involved.
Also, purely on a practical basis, I would advise you that his firm has a history of getting unpleasantly entangled with some of their clients. Meaning, he ends up owning a large chunk of the startups he represents. And candidly, I know he is still hurt that you turned down his investment offer (which for the record was 100% the right choice).
But it’s totally up to you, I know this is a large attractive firm.
REPLY
No no no you’re right. I took a walk and got my head on straight. I can’t afford to have some big legal team monkeying around in all our shit. We have a MASSIVE security liability, if anything leaks during this process we are straight-up FUCKED. Not worth it. For the company or for us.
I trust YOU. That’s the bottom line. And there’s barely anybody I can trust right now. So I went and talked to Adhi and Paolo and they’re cool with this, so I wanna propose—how bout come work for us?
Dead serious. Quit your job, quit working for your dad period. We’ll bring you in with CLO title and appropriate comp (I think like 250K is appropriate and doable at our funding level) plus stock options. Start tomorrow. We’re gonna need someone full-time for sure, you know what’s involved.
I don’t wanna pretend it’s gonna be anything other than a fuckton of work. You already know Goliath is coming after us…and there’s a limit to how many people we can bring in under you. Both funding-wise, and security-wise.
BUT on the bright side, we WILL get to spend a lot more time together. I know this isn’t what the Love Language book meant by “quality time” but at least SOME of it will be.
REPLY
Hey babe, this is super sudden and drastic. I mean first off, thank you very much for the offer. It really means a lot that you believe in me enough to propose that. And I do think it could be fun working together, as long as it’s me working with you and not for you.
But you know that for me to work my way up, I need time in-office at a reputable firm, which means riding this desk for at least another 9 months. I’m not saying no, I just need some time to think about it, and to prepare a transition plan if I’m going to pursue a change.
REPLY
Of course, sure. I guess I hoped you believed in me and this company enough to pull the trigger. If you’re not in a position to do so, I get it, it’s cool, but prob we will move on and offer to someone else, cause with this SEC shit I mean we need someone like yesterday.
Here’s the thing. I’ve gotten a legit glimpse into the future of this company—the future of this WORLD, and this company’s role in it—and I know it’s gonna be bright. I want what’s best for you and wouldn’t be offering this if I didn’t think it was a golden opportunity.
I know we’re a balance for each other, I’m the gas and you’re the brakes, I’m the dreamer and you’re the realist, each one has its ups and downs, that’s why we’re so good. Just consider it.
Five years ago I told you I didn’t wanna get married till I had my future figured out…and you convinced me, love means sometimes making a leap. Maybe this is one of those moments. Love me…love The Future:)
REPLY
OK I’m gonna go draft a letter of resignation. Fuck, my dad is gonna be so mad…
EXCERPT FROM CONGRESSIONAL HEARING—DECEMBER 1, 2021
SEN. ELIZABETH BYRNE (D-FL): Mr. Boyce, would you talk us through the decision to hire your wife as your chief legal officer?
BOYCE: I mean, it was a no-brainer. She’s the best lawyer I’ve ever met. And one of the smartest people, period. She wins, but also…she does it with heart, and character, and dignity. What more do you want?
SEN. ELIZABETH BYRNE (D-FL): Were there any other individuals considered for her position?
BOYCE: We needed to fill the position fast. And—look, if you’re saying this was a case of nepotism—no way. Leila was young, sure, but so were we. And she was incredibly qualified. Top of her law school class, cum laude as an undergrad. And she came to us after distinguishing herself while working at a top-tier law firm.
SEN. ELIZABETH BYRNE (D-FL): Where she was, to be clear…hired by her father.
BOYCE: Yes. And…so what? Look, Leila’s great at her job, she’s whip-smart and super savvy, and…she was in a unique position to be able to help.
TEXT MESSAGE EXCHANGE
LEILA KEENER-BOYCE
June 7, 2021 3:14 PM
Hey A, it looks like we’re gonna be working together again. Just like back in college, right?
ADHVAN CHAUDRY
Yeah.
Guess nothing really changes.
Ha. Except my hair, thank God. And come on, you’ve changed plenty.
Doesn’t feel like it.
If nothing else, you’re a millionaire now.
Doesn’t feel like it.
You OK Eeyore?
Yeah sorry just tired.
Ben asked me to brief you on the tech.
I’ll send over specs in a few.
And the original research paper is a good start.
OK, but it’s all gonna be Greek to me. Do you think we could meet up later? It would be a lot easier if you could walk me through it all in person.
Just like freshman year.
Ha. Yeah. Well, nothing really changes, right?
I’m in back to backs with my engineers.
Swing by the office at 6, we’ll get started?
Great, I’ll bring Thai. You still do pad see ew with beef?
Chicken now.
I guess one thing changes—my metabolism.
Lol see ya then.
June 8, 2021 7:18 AM
Hey…
Sorry about last night.
You there?
June 8, 2021 7:35 AM
I shouldn’t have said all that.
I’m not sleeping enough.
Not thinking straight.
I’m gonna get back to seeing my therapist.
And exercising regularly.
June 8, 2021 8:13 AM
Hey A. Sorry, I just got up.
Look, it’s OK. I’m not going to say anything about it to Ben. I had no idea how much you’d been keeping to yourself, I’m sure that’s been really hard. But just to give my two cents and some perspective, what you’ve been building up inside your head is not the reality.
Basically what I’m trying to say is, I’m not all that you think I am.
Yes you are.
But it was wrong of me to say all that.
I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.
It’s prob better for me to do everything email from now on.
So you can hide behind the screen?
Something like that.
Whatever you need. I’m working on the letter now, I’ll share it for you to review later.
No need I’m sure it’s great.
Fire away.
TUMBLR BLOG POST—JUNE 8, 2021
THE BLACK HOLE: ANONYMOUS MUSINGS OF A SCI-FI SUPERFAN
“The Curse”
Vampires have generally been consigned to the realm of fantasy,
but if my small readership will indulge me today,
I would argue for their inclusion in the sci-fi canon.
First, because (if you set aside the magical bat-transformations)
the rules are scientific: A bite. An infection. Changed biochemistry.
Extended longevity in exchange for new appetites.
Even though these stories originated as Gothic Romance,
the personal truth in them is illuminating and profound,
which is why we keep coming back to them, year after year,
from Victorian England to modern teenage television.
I think it is fundamentally because we all relate
to their endless, selfish, ravaging hunger.
The way vampires love—that is how we all fear that we love.
With an endless desire that will only drain the object of our affection.
The way Dracula loved Mina,
that is the curse of the vampire—
the knowledge that desire, if indulged, will only bring misery.
Love, for the vampire, needs to be an impossible hunger.
Which is why, as much as I may offend diehard fans,
and lose nerd cred for saying it…
the best it’s ever been expressed is in Buffy.
The impossible will-they-won’t-they of a vampire and a Slayer
was simple, elegant, sexy, and fun.
Buffy and Angel were equally matched enemies who became unlikely allies—
and for all the torture of frustrated desire,
the tension between them was exquisite.
It built until they finally indulged and consummated their love.
But in the moment (S2E14: “Innocence”) when Angel tasted true bliss—
he was not saved.
He was ruined.
And he reverted into a monster.
It was for mumbo-jumbo story reasons related to an ancient gypsy curse,
but even those of us who have never met a gypsy know…
if I am a vampire, love and happiness are not for me. Never will be.
This is why the Twilight books are such an abomination.
It is not the mediocre prose so much as the arc of the story
which presupposes that, by becoming a vampire herself,
Bella gets a happily-ever-after with Edward.
The fantasy is juvenile for its suggestion
that love can heal and redeem the darkest among us.
Anyone over the age of 15 cringes—
not at the story’s faux-darkness, but at its optimism.
THE EVOLUTION OF VAMPIRIC ROMANCE
If vampire stories teach us anything, it is the truth about love:
that it is not a destination of contentment,
so much as an endless yearning.
And if there is happiness and purpose to be found in this life,
it will be in a frustrated friendship—
suppressing the urges I know will be destructive
in order to protect, from myself, the object of my affection.
FORMAL REPLY SUBMITTED TO THE SEC
June 9, 2021
Dear Sirs,
I am writing in regard to your notification of an Active Investigation into The Future LLC (hereafter designated as “The Company”) operated by Benjamin Boyce and Adhvan Chaudry (hereafter designa
ted as “The Partners”).
As Chief Counsel, I am writing to request an immediate dismissal and disavowal of this Investigation, on the grounds that
1) Invocation of the Insider Trading and Securities Act of 1988 (Title 17 CFR 240.10b5-1) is inappropriate in this situation, since the Company is not (at the time of this Investigation) a publicly traded entity, and therefore is not subject to provisions of the ITSA.
2) The Company and its Partners have not engaged in any speculative investment, except for investment in their own company. The ITSA has been used to prosecute inappropriate share-dumping, but never has it been used (nor should it be used) to prosecute entrepreneurs investing in their own ventures.
3) The additional Investors who have speculatively provided seed-funding and ownership-stake investment have done so in good faith, only with knowledge about the Company provided by the Company, which therefore cannot be considered “Insider” status.
On these grounds, we decline the request to turn over proprietary data and information, which is of substantial private value and constitutes Trade Secrets, until such a time as a Federal Circuit Court Judge has issued and upheld any subpoena.
Respectfully,
Leila Keener-Boyce
Chief Legal Officer
The Future, LLC
EXCERPT FROM CONGRESSIONAL HEARING—DECEMBER 1, 2021
SEN. KAREN WILSON (D-NV): Mr. Boyce, the ongoing investigation by the SEC has bogged down in a legal quagmire, which cannot be—
BOYCE: Hold up, I just want to say one thing about that. That whole case is a hatchet job. They’ve been coming after us on everything they can think of, even though it makes no sense, just because we’re disruptors, and they’re in the pocket of all the entrenched power structures. Meaning Wall Street. What we’re doing is not insider trading, it’s—
