by Mary Leo
Not that her mom was any better, but RuthieAnn always thought that if her dad had been half the man her mom had expected, that maybe, just maybe her mom wouldn’t have been in such a desperate search for love.
For everything RuthieAnn had accomplished since she left Wild Creek, her dad’s words could still bring her down. Make her doubt herself. Make her think she wasn’t worthy of any happiness. That she would eventually fail Jayden just like her parents had failed both of their children.
Her breathing became shallow as she listened to her dad’s continued coughing, and the steady voices of his nurses trying to get him under control. RuthieAnn knew if she hung around there much longer, she’d have a full-blown panic attack . . . something she was no stranger to. She’d had several in her life. The most recent just last week when Pearl had called to give her the news about her dad. Fortunately, RuthieAnn had learned how to handle her panic attacks, but she had to be careful not to let Jayden see her in the middle of one. It would scare him too much.
She forced herself to take slow deep breaths, and to think of something pleasant. At once Chase Cooper came to mind, and his generous invitation. She would like nothing more than to spend some time with him, to get to know him better, to take him up on those riding lessons for Jayden. But the way she was feeling about her dad, and the deep guilt she felt for Chase only heightened her already raw emotions. What she really should do was pick up her son, and drive back home to Vegas. This whole trip had been a monumental mistake.
She knew that for certain now.
IT WAS THE third time Chase glanced at his grandfather’s antique clock on the mantel in the living room. It was going on seven, and his mom had held up dinner long enough. It was time to admit it: RuthieAnn Dolan would not be coming to dinner. And after what his mom had said about Jayden’s dad being the possible hit-and-run driver, Chase really hoped she would show up. He wanted to know more about him—much more.
“I think we should go ahead and eat,” Chase told his sister who busied herself in the kitchen with her mom. In the past six months, Shiloh had one hundred percent improved her cooking skills. She could barely cook a hotdog before that, but much to Chase’s surprise, she’d been taking lessons from their mom, and the beef roast was all Shiloh’s doing tonight, and it looked amazing.
“I wonder what went wrong?” Shiloh asked. “I hope she’s okay.”
“Do you have her number?” his youngest brother, Draven, asked. He liked to help out in the kitchen as well. Not that he could cook, but he liked spending time with their mom, Catherine. Being the youngest at twenty-five, their mom still doted on him, and Draven ate it up. Chase didn’t think he’d ever man up and leave the nest, not if their mom kept adding more feathers to said nest every time he even mentioned moving out. “Maybe we should call her to make sure she’s okay. I mean, if RuthieAnn decided to stay out at Clark’s place anything could’ve happened. That house should have been condemned years ago.”
Draven still had that military posture he’d acquired from his time in the Army, but everything else about him screamed cowboy. He only wore boots, jeans, and black or gray T-shirts along with the same deep-tan-colored cowboy hat he’d worn since he was a teen. Draven was by far the best looking of the Cooper brothers with his thick brown-black hair, and whiskey-colored eyes that were surrounded by so many eyelashes he looked like he wore makeup.
Draven was a creature of habit and a stickler for details. The kind of guy who didn’t like to color outside the lines, no matter what was happening around him. If Draven had met RuthieAnn and asked her to dinner, he would have her phone number, and where she was staying, as well as every detail of her itinerary while she was in Wild Creek.
Chase didn’t have any of those things, and hadn’t even thought about getting her phone number, which certainly would have helped right about now. “I don’t have her number. But you might be right. Anything could have happened to her in that house. I think I’m going to drive on over there.”
“Now?” his mom asked as she dumped the steaming mashed potatoes into a bowl. “I’m putting dinner on the table. You can at least eat with us, and then drive over. RuthieAnn’s a big girl. I’m sure she’s fine.”
“Maybe she is, but I won’t be able to enjoy dinner unless I know for sure. Besides, who knows what her boy might have gotten into? I owe Clark enough to make sure his daughter is okay. I’ll be back in no time. Keep a plate warm for me.”
“But son—”
“Look who’s here,” Chase’s other younger brother, Hunter, said as he walked into the kitchen followed by RuthieAnn and her son Jayden. Clint and Duke followed close behind, looking for love from these strangers. Every time someone new came into the house, the dogs seemed to think that new person or persons were there just to visit with them. They patiently waited for some loving which they were sure would come at any moment . . . and usually did before the visit was over.
At the moment, however, neither RuthieAnn nor Jayden paid much attention to the dogs, so they sat patiently and waited.
Chase had to admit that RuthieAnn looked even lovelier in the warm glow of the kitchen’s overhead lighting than she had earlier that day. Her chocolate-colored hair had been pulled back off her face, but still hung in soft waves down her back. She wore enough makeup to enhance her big beautiful deep brown eyes, shine to her soft-pink full lips, and an added dimension to her strong chin and rosy cheeks. She’d changed out of the jeans and tee she’d worn earlier that day and now wore a loose-fitting knee-length white lacy dress, and short rust-colored cowgirl boots. Dangly silver earrings, the kind his sister made, hung from her ears, and several chained bands wrapped around her wrists.
Chase felt the grin bubble up inside him before he saw the smile of recognition on RuthieAnn’s sweet face.
“I’m sorry we’re so late,” she said, while her son held onto her hand. He looked frightened of just about everything and everyone around him, except for the dogs. Chase caught that every time Jayden glanced their way a little smile brushed his lips.
“It’s fine,” Chase’s mom assured her. She never liked to have any of her guests feel the least bit uneasy about anything . . . especially their arrival time.
“I didn’t realize it had gotten so late,” RuthieAnn explained. “I wasn’t going to impose, but Jayden insisted. He wanted to see Midnight Shadow one more time. I hope that’s okay?”
“It’s no imposition at all. We’re happy to have you both,” his mom announced. Then she held out her hand and approached RuthieAnn. “I’m Catherine Cooper, mother to this brood. It’s so nice to finally meet you, RuthieAnn, and your boy—Jayden, is it?”
They shook hands, then RuthieAnn leaned down and told her son to say hello, which he did, but he never moved. “Yes. Nice to meet you, Mrs. Cooper,” RuthieAnn said.
“Please call me Catherine. And do you go by RuthieAnn or Ruthie?” Catherine asked.
“She’s Mama,” Jayden stated, causing everyone to chuckle.
“That’s your special name for me,” RuthieAnn gently told him. “But other people can call me RuthieAnn or Ruthie. I like either one.”
“Me too,” Jayden said, as the tiniest of grins touched his lips. He finally seemed to begin to relax as Duke cautiously approached, with Clint a few steps behind.
“Duke, sit,” Shiloh, ordered, and Duke immediately sat on his haunches, waiting for his next command. “If the dogs are bothering either of you, we can put them in the office for the night.”
Before RuthieAnn could answer, Jayden reached out and patted Duke on the head. The dog seemed to love it and raised his snout for more. Jayden obliged, giggling.
“Normally, I would go along with that, but I think we’re fine with the dogs.” She leaned over to get her son’s attention. “Jayden, are you okay?”
“Okay,” he said, as he patted Clint’s head as well.
“That’s Clint,” Hunter told him. “And this is Duke. He has a little more black in his coat. That’s how we tell them apa
rt.”
Jayden nodded, as he ran his hand over Duke’s silky dappled coat.
Then Catherine introduced everyone in the room with hellos all around while Chase watched, utterly mesmerized by RuthieAnn. She just looked so much like the girl from his dream that he had an almost irresistible urge to tell her, but knew if he did, she would think he was some kind of crazed person.
Chase walked over to Jayden and knelt on one knee so they were both on the same level. He’d learned a long time ago that kids were more likely to respond if he moved down to their level, especially children with special needs. “You can come by anytime to see Midnight Shadow. I’m sure he would love to see you.”
Jayden’s face beamed as his little arms wrapped around Chase’s neck. And at that moment, Chase’s heart broke wide open. At first, he didn’t know what to do, and gave the boy a quick hug back. Jayden pulled him in even tighter. Then in the next second, Jayden had let go and was back at his mother’s side, like nothing had happened. But by then, it was too late. Jayden had won Chase’s heart forever, and no matter what might transpire between his mom and Chase, he and Jayden would always have a special bond.
Of that, Chase was certain.
“Let’s get this food out on the table so Jayden can visit with Midnight Shadow,” Catherine said. “Everybody please grab a plate.”
And everyone did just that as if every plate of goodness had been pre-assigned. Even Jayden ever so carefully carried out a small bowl of olives into the dining room, his lips stretched into a perfect little grin.
Three
“Dinner was amazing, and your family is way too kind. It must be comforting to be part of such a warm and loving group of people,” RuthieAnn told Chase as they headed out to the horse barn.
The way she was feeling, probably due to the glass of wine she’d had, she didn’t know if she should be alone with him. She rarely drank anymore, so one glass made her tipsy. She was glad Jayden walked by her side. He really wanted to see Midnight Shadow, and although RuthieAnn would have liked to skip this part of the visit, she knew she didn’t have a choice in the matter.
It was time to apologize to the man she’d left on the side of the road that morning five years ago, time she made peace with him. And in doing so, she might be able to forgive herself for the absolute worst decision of her life, no matter the consequences. She hoped he would forgive her, but she would understand if he couldn’t.
It had been raining on and off all evening, and the temperature had fallen. Shiloh had lent RuthieAnn a lovely bright pink wool scarf, which now draped around her shoulders, and kept her toasty. She’d been smart enough to bring along Jayden’s blue hoodie, which he’d resisted putting on until Chase told him that even cowboys wore a jacket when it rained. Jayden seemed to like that concept and allowed RuthieAnn to slip the hoodie over his head.
“That scarf you’re wearing, is it yours?” Chase asked almost as if there was something significant about the scarf, as if he was trying to remember something about it.
“No. It’s your sister’s.”
It suddenly occurred to RuthieAnn that she’d taken off her pink jacket that morning of the accident, and slipped it under his head as he laid on the ground, battered and broken. It was the least she could do to make him more comfortable. She’d forgotten about it until that moment, forgotten that the jacket was pink.
“Maybe that’s where I’ve seen it before. It’s just that . . . well, it’s not important.”
She knew the more she was around Chase, the better chance he had of recognizing her, if he hadn’t already . . . and maybe he was just waiting for the chance to get the jump on her, then report her for the hit-and-run accident that could have killed him.
Still, she couldn’t seem to break away from his charms.
Heaven help her, but of all the men she’d met that weren’t doctors or physical therapists, Chase had been the kindest to her son. And what made it even harder for her was the fact that Jayden seemed to really like him, a fact she’d swore she would never let happen. She didn’t want Jayden to fall for anyone in her life she knew would be temporary, and Chase Cooper would certainly be even more temporary than most.
Yet there she was slowly walking into what had to be a cowboy’s favorite place on earth: a horse barn . . . a really nice horse barn . . . actually, more of a stable. There had to be at least fifteen horses bedded down inside. From what she could see, they were mostly thoroughbreds, a couple of paints and a beautiful cream-colored quarter horse that stuck its head over the stall door to see who was coming inside. RuthieAnn couldn’t help but reach out and give the sweet horse a little love.
“That’s Miss Pie. She’s a two-year-old and loves the company of women. My mom and my sister can’t get by her without a visit and some loving. Now that you’ve touched her, she’ll be your friend forever and expect you to love her every time you see her.”
“No problem there. She’s a sweetheart.” RuthieAnn nuzzled the horse as if they’d been great friends for years. She’d never had a real love for horses despite having grown up around them, but Miss Pie was different. RuthieAnn could sense it right off. If she hung around here for any length of time, they’d bond . . . a concept RuthieAnn never thought she would ever consider. “Curious name for a horse.”
“When she was a filly, my mom set a warm apple pie out on our picnic table. Somehow Miss Pie here got out of the corral and tore into it. My mom had to literally pull her away from the pie. Ever since then, Mom will sneak her a slice of apple pie. I think my sister does the same thing.”
“Might explain why Miss Pie here likes women so much. She thinks we’re all going to feed her pie.”
“Ya know, you may be onto something there.”
They both laughed as Miss Pie nudged RuthieAnn, obviously looking for a slice.
Once she begrudgingly left the sweet Miss Pie, RuthieAnn tried her best to either lag behind Chase or to keep her distance as they strolled around the well-lit barn. Whenever they were within a few inches of each other, she swore she could physically feel the heat that wanted to ignite into a flame.
After what had to be one of the most lively and delicious family dinners she’d ever attended, Chase had offered to show her their refurbished horse barn and the small covered arena where he would be teaching Jayden to ride. Not that she’d made a commitment to do it. Still, the more she spoke to him, experienced his wonderful family—and now that she saw how amazing the facility was—she didn’t know how she could refuse. His kindness and the generosity of his family were way over the top. She didn’t deserve any of this, but she also couldn’t help herself from languishing in Chase’s kindness.
She’d been shut off from family and friends for so long that it felt as if her very soul needed to pull in the warmth. Even the family dogs were sweet and seemed to like Jayden. Normally dogs scared Jayden, especially bigger dogs, but ever since they’d walked in the front door, both Clint and Duke had become Jayden’s best buddies, sitting alongside him at the dinner table, then lying on their sides so Jayden could more easily pet them. It made her rethink getting him a dog. She hadn’t been sure he would take to a dog, especially a bigger dog, but from what she could tell, that may be changing.
“You and your siblings seem really close,” RuthieAnn said, trying to keep the conversation going.
Chase snickered as he grabbed a two-step ladder for Jayden to stand on in front of Midnight Shadow’s stall. “My family can be a handful at times, but they’re good people.”
As Chase helped Jayden up the ladder so he could reach Midnight Shadow, RuthieAnn noticed he used his left hand to help Jayden and not his right. A nuance that she’d caught several times. However, he’d eaten his meal with his right hand, so unless he was ambidextrous, there was something going on with his right arm, something he seemed to be guarding. Now that she thought about it, he favored his left arm over his right whenever he had to pick something up, or, like in this case, help her son up the ladder.
Ruth
ieAnn immediately wondered if this was left over from the accident, like his slight limp or maybe he had recently injured himself doing ranch work.
She didn’t have time to dwell on this because as soon as Jayden connected with Midnight Shadow, her son’s entire body seemed to embrace the happy moment. His little hands waved his happiness, arms held close to his sides. Then he reached out to pet the horse with gentle strokes, while RuthieAnn slipped her arm around her son’s waist to steady him on the ladder.
RuthieAnn loved seeing her boy so happy. It seemed as if he belonged on a ranch.
“Shiloh told me you have another brother, Reese Jr. I can’t imagine having four siblings. I only have one brother, Kevin, and I haven’t seen him in several years. Even when we were young, our relationship was usually strained. I tried to get him to come out to Vegas a couple times, but it never worked out. Now he’s living in San Diego with a cousin and going to school. I doubt that I’ll get to see him anytime soon.”
“Won’t he be coming out to see Clark?”
RuthieAnn didn’t want to bare her soul in front of her son, so she kept her true feelings to herself. “Kevin made his peace with our dad before he left. Besides, he says he can’t miss any of his classes or he’ll get too far behind.”
She secretly would love to see her brother. The last time she’d seen him, she’d tucked him into bed the night before she’d left. He’d been all of twelve years old, and obsessed with video games.
“He’s a good kid. I tried to get him into the business of ranching, but that wasn’t his dream. He’s a great cowboy, but he had other plans. And who can blame him? Ranching is a tough business. So what’s his major?”
“Game design. He wants to work for a company that designs video games. He loves that kind of stuff. Always has.”
RuthieAnn remembered how her brother would lock himself in his room for hours at a time just playing one game after another. As soon as he mastered one, he’d go onto the next one. She never realized gaming had so much potential.
