“Wait! Where are you going?”
Tanner jerked a look up at the chief. “Where do you think? Over to her house to try to explain things.”
“But she said she didn’t want to see you.”
Wiping sweat off his brow, Tanner shrugged. “Tough. I love her, and there’s no way I’m walking away from her or this situation.”
* * *
Brie stood just inside her living room, looking around. Her home had been in a shambles, and now her life was. Tears dribbled down her cheeks, and she sniffed, wiping them away. She walked around. Linc had held her on that couch while she cried out her heart, trusting him, learning to reach out once again and express her feelings. They had shared their first kiss on that couch.…
With a little cry, Brie turned away. She had trusted Linc, had given him her life, and all along he’d suspected her of being a killer. His tenderness, his kisses were all an elaborate sham to get her to spill whatever she knew.
Brie stumbled into her bedroom, the only room in the house that had been completely returned to its original state after the break-in. She sat on the mattress. When had she fallen in love with Linc? It didn’t matter; her heart was aching so much that it felt as if her entire chest was being shattered.
She heard the back door being opened and then closed. Trying to blot the tears from her eyes and wondering who it was, Brie reached for a handkerchief.
“Brie?” Tanner stood tensely in the bedroom door, his face filled with anguish.
“You!” she cried, leaping to her feet. “Get the hell out of here!”
He winced at the anger in her voice. “No way,” he growled, moving toward her. Before she could escape, Linc grabbed her by the arm, forcing her toward him.
Brie struggled to get loose. “Let me go! Let me go, you liar!”
Tanner saw the pain in her huge green eyes. He didn’t want to hurt her, he’d hurt her enough. “Settle down,” he said softly. “Listen to me, Brie. Just take one minute and listen to me. I can explain everything.”
Fury goaded her into trying to throw off his hold on her arms, but it was impossible. “Explain what?” Brie cried hoarsely. “You lied to me, Linc. I was a suspect! You thought I was the killer all along! Everything you did…your kisses…your tenderness, was a sham, a lie!”
He gave her a little shake. “No, Brie, I love you. That was never a lie—”
“No!” she wailed, throwing off his hold. She staggered backward, caught her balance then moved around the bed, keeping distance between them. “Everything you did was an act, Tanner. Everything! How do you think I feel?” She struck her chest. “I loved you! I fell in love with you. I don’t know how or when it happened, but it did. And what I feel—felt was real. I didn’t lie. You did!”
He stood there, every breath fiery agony. Brie loved him. “I love you, too, Brie. That was never a lie.” Holding out his hand, Linc pleaded, “Please, you’ve got to believe me. Falling in love with you wasn’t something I planned on. Yes, you were a suspect. But put yourself in my shoes. Wouldn’t you have done the same thing if you were a stranger coming in on a case like this? I had to get enough evidence one way or another to make a decision about you.”
Brie glared at him. “I’m sorry,” she said, “but I can’t put myself in your shoes.”
“Please, Brie, hear me out,” Linc begged softly. “Maybe I wasn’t honest with you on a lot of things, and believe me, I feel badly about it, but my feelings for you were never a lie. They’re real.” Linc touched his heart. “You have to believe me, Brie. I love you. Can’t we hold on to that one fact, that truth, then sort through the rest of this stuff together?”
Brie suddenly felt dizzy. She closed her eyes, touching her damp brow. “I don’t know where truth and lies begin and end with you,” she whispered raggedly.
“Come on,” he coaxed. “Sit down on the bed. Let me explain, little cat. Please…for both our sakes, hear me out.”
Trying to assess Linc through the wall of pain she felt over his betrayal, Brie finally moved. Tensely, she sat on the edge of the bed.
“Good,” Linc said in a trembling voice, going to sit on his side of the bed. Where to begin? How to convince Brie? Never had Linc wanted anyone more. Never had he felt the fear of loss as sharply as now. Linc hadn’t prayed in years, but he did now, remembering prayers Father O’Reilly had taught him. Wrestling with words, phrases, trying to get them into some kind of coherent order, the minutes passed, the silence brittle between them.
“When I first came on this case,” Linc began in a low voice, “I was burned out. I tried to get out of it, but my boss in D.C. promised me a long-overdue desk job if I took it.” He held Brie’s gaze, loving her more than he ever thought he could love anyone. “I’d almost been killed on that last case, and coming on to this one, I was very jumpy. And I did treat you as a suspect.
“But, as I got to know you and saw you in all kinds of different circumstances, I began to feel differently, Brie.” Linc grimaced, unable to hold her gaze. “The first night I went through your desk, reading some letters from your family and friends.”
Brie gasped. “You what?”
Wincing, Linc nodded. “Yeah, I feel pretty bad about it, Brie. I’m sorry.” Forcing himself to look at her, he saw the sparks of anger in her jade-colored eyes. “It was the first evidence I had that you hadn’t set up John. Then, after that, I waited to see if you really were genuinely affected by John’s death, or if it was just a cover and you were playing a part with me.”
“I never once playacted,” Brie whispered. “Every emotion, every feeling you saw in me was real, Linc. And that’s more than I can say for you.”
Hanging his head, he nodded. “Yeah…I know.” Closing his eyes, feeling as if Brie was slipping away from him, he went on. “Somewhere along the line, I started falling in love with you, the woman, not the hazmat tech. Sure, I respected your knowledge and what you did, but the more I was around you, the more you affected me on some unknown inner level of myself.” Lifting his head, Linc held her gaze, seeing very little anger left in her eyes. Groaning to himself, he remembered the luster in them after he’d made beautiful love with her. The ache in his chest widened.
“Little things you did, like fixing me homemade meals and desserts…and Homely Homer…” Linc cleared his throat, watching her face lose all its tension, replaced with tenderness. “You made a house a home, Brie. I never realized it until I was living with you those first five days. I never had that feeling with JoAnne. It’s you, how you are, the way you see the world, that made me realize a lot of things.” He absently picked at a loose thread on the quilt thrown across the bed. “I found myself telling you about me, something I’d never done. It actually felt good to talk to you about my growing-up years. JoAnne never knew about them. I was…ashamed of where I’d come from.”
Brie bowed her head. “Oh, Linc…”
“No, let me finish. Please. That night you broke the glass in the kitchen and I held you on the couch…kissed you…” Linc took in a broken breath. “At that point, I knew you had been the victim, and weren’t the killer. All I had to do was prove it to the FM and ATF.”
She lifted her chin, staring at him, tears in her eyes. “Then why didn’t you tell me?”
Linc held her wavering gaze, aching to reach across the bed and pull her into his arms. “Because you were so fragile. I didn’t want to upset you any more than you already were because you were trying to recover. It was a lousy judgment call on my part, Brie.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “Remember. This is Linc Tanner, the tough kid from the Bronx who had shielded himself from any kind of emotional involvement. To tell you the truth, I didn’t know how to deal with you. I’d fallen in love with you, Brie, and I was limited by my inexperience. I didn’t know what to do or how to do it.”
“I failed you. I can’t tell you how many sleepless nights I spent because I was lying to you. I was afraid to tell you, because I knew you liked me a lot, and I loved you.” He shook
his head. “I didn’t know you loved me…not until just now…”
Linc’s torn admission was dissolving her anger and answering her questions. His features were drawn in agony, his eyes reflecting his panic and fear of having lost her. “Then your childhood was real, it wasn’t a lie.”
He cleared his throat, unable to hold her compassionate gaze. “At no time did I lie to you about my past or about my marriage to JoAnne. Brie, I just didn’t tell you who I was, that was all. How we got along, our feelings, my thoughts and what I shared with you, were real. Please believe me.” His voice cracked.
Brie turned away, staring numbly at the flowered wallpaper, the silence weighing heavy in the room. Linc had no reason to lie now that he’d told her he was an ATF agent. He was here, trying to salvage what was left of their relationship, which had been shattered by his lie. Turning, she studied him in the silence.
Linc forced out, “You’re like that kitten I found, Brie. You bring out all the good things I’ve been hiding from myself.”
Brie sat, finally understanding Linc and what she meant to him.
Linc forced himself to move, to get to his feet. He’d done what he could to try to convince Brie of his love for her. “I’ll get going now, Brie. I’ve made a mess of your life. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I only meant to protect you, and in one way I did. In the other way, I screwed it up.”
Linc made his way out of the room and down the hall. Misery suffocated him. Well, what did he expect? For Brie to forgive him? Slowing down, he gave the living room a longing look. Brie always had living trees and plants in there, symbolizing life. She was life, he thought. Brie had given him life by simply being herself. She had brought the gift of knowing he wasn’t the cold robot JoAnne had always accused him of being. Brie had brought out his softer, more vulnerable side, and he liked himself and what he was becoming.
“Linc?”
He halted, hearing Brie’s strained voice. He turned and saw her in the hall, her face pale. He braced himself, knowing he deserved whatever she was going to tell him. He had lied to her. He had been deceitful. “What is it?” His voice was hoarse.
Brie made a gesture toward the living room. “I need some help getting this house cleaned up. Do you think you could hang around a few days and help me before you leave?”
He saw the hope burning in Brie’s green eyes. His mouth dropped open and he snapped it shut, not believing his ears. “Stay? Here?” There was disbelief in his voice.
Managing a strained smile, Brie nodded. “Yes.”
Risking everything, Linc said, “If I stay those few days, I’m not leaving, Brie. Do you understand that?”
She took in a ragged breath. “I don’t want it any other way.”
Linc closed his eyes, feeling dizzy with elation. Brie had believed him! He loved her, and now he was going to get a chance to prove it. Opening his eyes, he managed a sour grin. “Sure?”
“Very sure,” Brie answered, opening her arms to him.
Chapter Eleven
The lap, lap, lap of water against the boat nearly lulled Brie to sleep. She heard Linc casting out again with his rod and reel, the nylon singing through the air. The combination of sun, the sweet smell of the lake and the incessant breeze tempted her to give in to the fingers of sleep. She lay on the bottom of a fourteen-foot wooden boat, which was anchored near the edge of a huge island of lily pads. Good bass fishing, Linc had told her earlier in a conspiratorial tone. And she had laughed, throwing her arms around him. Where had the weeks gone?
After finding John’s evidence, which had put Carter behind bars, it seemed as if her life had speeded up. Earl Hansen was granted immunity because he was going to testify for the prosecution. The ATF was following up on the New Jersey end of the investigation, which had already ballooned into scandalous proportions. And Linc had protected her from the press when the story finally broke. He had remained at her side when both state and government law-enforcement officials had questioned her for days on end.
A soft sigh escaped Brie. She had drawn even closer to Linc, if that was possible. Throughout the investigation, they had turned to one another for support and love. Suddenly, she felt the entire boat jerk, and her eyes flew open.
“I got one!” Linc crowed triumphantly, the rod bending as he played the fish who had taken the bait.
Brie sat up, sleepily rubbing her eyes. Life with Linc had been a miracle. The house was back in order; so were their lives. Days had melted into weeks, and then into six months. Homely Homer had grown up and spread her wings. She was free and happy.
Shortly after the trial in which Carter was sentenced to prison, Linc had presented her with two airline tickets to Calgary, Canada, and a brochure on mountain cabins two hundred miles from the Canadian city. He humbled himself to ask and not to tell her that she was going with him for two weeks to escape. And she loved him for his thoughtfulness and said yes.
Watching Linc, she noted how his face reflected excitement as he reeled in his catch. For two days now, since their arrival, he had been trying to get a huge wide-mouthed bass that was so much a part of the blue lake’s fame. No stranger to fishing, Brie had counseled Linc on what type of equipment he should use. Being a city boy, he felt he knew better. Instead of using a plastic frog and jiggling it in the water, he had decided on a night crawler dropped to the bottom of the lake.
“This is a big one, Brie. Look at it pull. This is going to be the biggest bass that’s ever been—”
Suddenly, Brie broke into laughter. What surfaced wasn’t a bass, but a turtle. Linc scowled as he stared down at the dark green amphibian floating peacefully beside the boat.
“I’ll be,” Linc muttered. Then a grin cracked his mouth and he turned to see Brie holding her stomach because she was laughing so hard. It was so good to see her relaxed and happy again. It was worth hooking a turtle instead of a bass.
Brie slid an arm around his neck and rested her head against his. “You’re one of a kind, Tanner. You really are. I told you if you used worms and fished off the bottom that you’d get garbage.”
He pressed a kiss to her jaw. “You never said anything about turtles. Now help me get that hook out of that poor critter’s mouth so we can let him go about his business.”
“City boy,” she teased, expertly sliding the hook free with pliers and giving the turtle a pat on its broad-shelled back. She sat up and handed Linc the hook minus the worm.
He set the rod and reel aside and pulled Brie into his lap. “I’m done fishing for today. I’m glad you didn’t pick up that camera and catch me with my ‘bass.’”
Brie pressed her mouth against his clean shaven cheek, inhaling his male scent. “You’re going to have to bribe me to keep quiet about this, Tanner. This is one fish story that’s too good not to be told.”
His blue eyes darkened. “Why you little—”
Brie wriggled out of his arms and sat in the bottom of the boat where she had spread a sleeping bag for comfort. She watched Linc’s expression as he came after her. The dangerous glint in his cobalt eyes sent her pulse skyrocketing and her body crying for his touch. She wasn’t disappointed as Linc took her into his arms, pressing her against him, and began a slow assault of kisses.
“You know,” he said, “you are getting out of hand.”
Brie sighed as his tongue traced her mouth. “You’re reverting back to your chauvinistic cave-man tactics again,” she reminded him huskily, staring up at him through half-closed eyes.
Linc nipped her lips, then relished her feminine softness. “I know. You just bring it out in me, Ms. Williams. Mmmm, you taste good, like a salty and sweet marshmallow.” He saw the look of pleasure in her eyes.
Brie caressed his cheek. “I love you.”
“How much?” he wanted to know, kissing her fingers.
“With all my heart.”
“How about for the rest of your life?”
Her arms tightened around his neck. “Linc…”
“Do you love me
enough to spend the rest of your life trying to change me and my chauvinistic ways?”
“Oh, Linc, I never thought you’d want to…”
He heard the wobble in Brie’s voice and knew he had surprised her. “Open the tackle box,” he said after a moment.
“What?”
He gave her an amused look. “Open the tackle box.”
It sat near her, and she flipped the latch, slowly opening the lid.
“Now what?” Brie asked, not quite sure what he was up to.
“The third plastic box. The one with the big hooks. Take it out and open it up.”
Her hands trembled slightly as she picked up the case and slid the cover off. A gasp escaped her. There, amid hooks of shiny brass, was an engagement ring. Only it wasn’t the usual diamond ring. Brie stared at it in awe. The ring was gold, but the oval stone was the most beautiful color of forest green she had ever seen.
“Let’s see if it fits,” Linc murmured next to her ear. “The stone is a green tourmaline from Brazil.”
Brie watched with widened eyes as he slowly slipped the ring on her fourth finger.
“Perfect. Well, what do you think?” She heard the satisfaction in his voice.
“I—it’s lovely, Linc. So lovely…”
“Want to wear it for a while and see how it feels?” he asked, his lips against her cheek.
She managed a choked sound. “Wear it for a while and see how it feels?”
He shrugged, holding her captive in his arms. “A modern woman like yourself might have to get used to wearing something that might make her feel like she was losing her freedom or whatever.”
Brie didn’t know whether to cry for joy or laugh at his taunting. “Linc Tanner, how can you tease me at a time like this!” The sunlight made her ring sparkle, as if it had a thousand emeralds.
“Actually, my joking is to cover up my terror at your saying no.”
She turned, seeing doubt in Linc’s eyes. “I love the ring,” she said in a low, trembling tone, “but even more important, I love you. And I will for the rest of my life.”
Come Gentle the Dawn Page 20
