"I'll try to remember it," Kilig answered. "But I'm a godless barbarian, so I'll probably forget. Can I come back tomorrow?"
"I don't have anything else to teach you."
"I'd love to read some of your books or hear you telling the story of the southern kingdoms."
"In that case..."
***
Saif was sick of Yatagan's worries. Having discussed the pros and cons of the situation from all sides, studying history, philosophy and even war treaties wasn't really helping.
"You're assassins, for the Gods' sake! Your job is to kill people! Do you really think the world will end if your latest victim has royal blood? The Varians and the Blackmore are too busy fighting each other to come south and invade us! The Kingdom of Lakeshi is no more! You want a city-state with a mayor and a town council? Get rid of the king! You're happy with the status quo? Leave him alone!"
Yatagan gave him a sour look, brow furrowed. "I know. You don't have to beat me with your sword about it."
"I can tell you the Genn rule is good," Saif continued. "And the Varian king is allied with the Genn. So if you think a Genn council is the safest bet for the city, work to get that. I'm sure you have plenty of Genn citizens who would love to help."
Yatagan exchanged a glance with his senior members.
"That's an excellent suggestion, Saif. We can make an informed decision now. Thank you for your advice."
So he released them of the consultancy burden, and Saif and Kilig left Jevina with sighs of relief. They'd spent more than a year with that useless consulting business. Saif looked forward to being on the road with Kilig again. Alone with Kilig.
"I can read and write, now, Saif," Kilig announced when the town was out of sight.
"Good," Saif replied with a grin. "We're not in a hurry to go back, though. You can show me something on the way."
"When do you think we'll be back in Godwalkar?"
"Mm... I think about two years since we left. Another training session in the wilderness... of foreign cities, although we share dialect and most of the culture!"
"That's fine with me," Kilig said. "Although I'd love to find a house and live with you. We could open a shop, selling knives and daggers, and still be assassins on the side..."
Startled, Saif looked at Kilig. "I thought you enjoyed being an assassin!"
"Saif," Kilig chided, squeezing his hand. "I enjoy being with you. I love you, remember?"
Saif thanked the gods for sending him that wonderful young man and his unconditional love.
***
Hakeem had just turned five when Lalima knocked on Mirabella's door. She hadn't brought Sanjana and looked ready to leave. Mirabella invited her in, but Lalima shook her head.
"I only came to tell you Saif is back in town. I'm off on assignment, so I won't be able to take you to meet him. But I trust you know where the guild is?"
"Yes, thank you, Lalima," Mirabella answered with a shaky voice, still startled by the news.
Lalima grinned and waved good-bye. Mirabella closed the door and looked at Hakeem, who sat on the floor with two wooden figurines. The child had Genn-green eyes, but brown curls, and when he was so concentrated on his game, he reminded her of Saif, who had looked so quiet and thoughtful during the few days they'd spent together.
And Saif was back. Lalima had tried to tell him about Mirabella and Hakeem, but he'd been distracted by some other matter and had been sent off on a mission before Lalima could talk to him again or warn Mirabella that he was back.
Two years had gone by, Suneeri was dead, and Ramya had found Mirabella a place where she could be independent and raise Hakeem on her own. It was barely a room over Ramya's shop and house, but it had an independent entrance, and Mirabella still worked with Ramya most of the time.
Mirabella knelt next to Hakeem on the wooden floor, observing how he was putting the two wooden figurines together as if they were lovers. Except it was a warrior and a young wizard with long hair. The child had a whole set of them – a cleric with ample breasts, an old witch, a mighty paladin, and even an androgynous Genn with his pointed ears and a Sila with his wings folded – but seemed to favor those two.
The figurines were very detailed, done by an artisan who specialized in sculpted wood. They weren't really toys, but since Hakeem treated them like people, he hadn't ruined them at all. They'd been a gift for his fourth birthday from Lalima and her partner.
"What are you doing?" Mirabella asked, caressing her son's head.
"Vic is seducing Wiz," Hakeem answered, serious.
"What? But why is Vic the Victorious wasting his time with skinny Wizard when beautiful Cler is totally in love with him?" She grabbed the cleric figurine and put it next to the two males.
Hakeem pondered. "He doesn't like her boobs."
"Why not?" Mirabella was nonplussed.
"Too big." Hakeem pushed away the cleric and grabbed the Genn. "Now, Sunflower is more beautiful..."
True that the Genn figurine had tiny bumps on the chest and a long gown, so it was probably a female, but Mirabella was still disconcerted. Hakeem badly needed a father figure.
"And where is the assassin?" She asked, looking in the carved wooden box that held all the figurines.
"I don't like it." Hakeem shrugged. "He has a beard."
Mirabella took his chin and forced him to look at her.
"Hakeem, your father has a beard. I think it's time you meet him, since he's in town."
Hakeem's eyes widened in wonder.
"Is he like Sanjana's dad? He has a beard!"
"Sort of. With your eyes."
Hakeem grinned. He liked Sanjana's father. He didn't see him often, since Lalima usually visited with Sanjana only, but he knew him.
"Let's put the toys back," Mirabella said. "Then we'll wash, put on clean clothes and go meet your father, all right?"
Hakeem obeyed. He was never a difficult child, and Mirabella felt blessed. But the lack of a father figure was obviously hurting his growth. She was sure Saif would love him, though. If she could find the right way to tell him how it happened...
***
Kilig was happy to be back in Godwalkar. He didn't care where he lived, as long as he could be with Saif. Talwar congratulated him for the job in Darantasia, then listened to Saif's report on the situation in Jevina.
"Over a year wasted," Saif concluded with a snort. "If we hadn't been Yatagan's guests all along, it would have been a complete loss."
"They got rid of the king," Talwar informed him. "They have a Genn council now, like us. Darantasia is thinking of following suit, since Human mayors don't seem to work very well."
"The Genn don't have royalty, or we'd be a Genn kingdom now." Saif grinned. "I'm glad, the Genn have more sense than most Human rulers I've met."
"Well, you can relax now." Talwar smiled. "We had a request and I sent them Francisca. Nimdja is back with Katar. You can stay here with Kilig. I think you deserve some time off."
Saif thanked him and retired with Kilig. The spartan bedroom with double bed would become theirs until they found another place.
"Now you teach me to read and write," Saif said with a grin. On the way back they hadn't done much in that department, too busy rediscovering each other's body – especially when they were out in open country and not inside crowded inns. Since their passion could become quite loud, they were considering finding a secluded house to move to.
Two days later they were seated at one of the canteen's tables with quills and parchments when the doorkeeper told Saif he had a visitor. Puzzled, Saif put down the quill he couldn't handle as well as a throwing knife and went to the courtyard, followed by Kilig.
A blonde woman with a child greeted Saif.
"Do you remember me?" she asked, a little worried.
"Of course, you're the northern witch who came to Godwalkar to complete her studies," Saif answered with a brief bow. "How come you haven't gone back home?"
"I was trying to find you, Saif. This child is your son."
&nbs
p; Kilig gasped. A northern witch had had a child from Saif? She must have bewitched him!
"I see." Saif spoke slowly, staring at the child who tentatively smiled at him.
"Saif, this can't be!" Kilig protested. "I thought you never touched a woman!"
"Not willingly, no. But things were confused that night at the inn," Saif answered, without looking at him. "She saved me, Kilig. Abhaya had poisoned me. I don't know how she healed me, but she's a wisewoman and I trust her."
"You called her a witch!"
"That's how she introduced herself." Saif looked at him. "I can't remember her name."
"Mirabella," she said quickly. "And you're correct, it's the healing process that put Hakeem in this world. He needs a father, Saif. Will you be his father?"
Horrified, Kilig watched Saif kneel in front of the child and smile.
"Hello, boy. What's your name?"
"Hakeem. You're my dad?"
"Apparently. You know you have a wonderful mom, don't you?"
Kilig's heart started breaking into tiny little pieces. He ran away from the courtyard, back up the stairs and straight into his room. He wanted to scream, but only crumbled on the floor, bursting into desperate sobs.
***
Saif realized Kilig was gone when he rose and turned around, looking for him.
"Your apprentice ran away," Mirabella said, serious. "You can complete his training, if you wish."
"Kilig's training is complete," Saif replied with a sigh. "He's twenty, and should be completely autonomous by now."
"So this one didn't try to poison you?"
"No, Kilig is my best student and I'm proud of what he's become."
She smiled ruefully.
"I'm sorry to take you away from your job, but your son needs you too, Saif. He's five already and I can't raise him on my own. And if I go back north with him and no husband, it will be even worse. I saved your life almost six years ago, it's now your turn to repay the favor."
Saif was conflicted. He loved Kilig, but he felt he owed Mirabella and her son – his son, who stared back at him with hopeful green eyes.
"Mirabella, you don't know who I am..."
"Lalima told me. How do you think I found you?"
"When did you meet Lalima?"
"I helped her give birth to Sanjana." Mirabella answered.
"Sanjana is my friend!" Hakeem quipped in. "And I like her dad!"
"Really?" Saif chuckled. "You know I grew up with him? Me and Aditya... we were inseparable!"
The boy's eyes widened in wonder.
And then Lalima came, and ruined everything, Saif thought, but he didn't say it. He looked at Mirabella.
"Allow me to say good-bye to Kilig," he said. "Where do you live?"
Mirabella gave him her address and left. Hakeem waved good-bye and Saif found himself returning the gesture with a grin. The little boy was adorable.
I'm over forty. I should retire from the Guild and take care of the family I never knew I had. I can move north, start a new life...
The pain in his chest reminded him of Kilig. If only he'd met someone like Kilig when he was younger... Sighing, he went back to the canteen, but Kilig wasn't there. He gathered the parchments and quills, since it was almost dinner time, and took them back to their room.
Kilig was there, curled up on the bed, his back to the door. He didn't move when Saif entered, but sniffed once.
Saif put away the writing materials, then sat on the bed and put one hand on Kilig's shoulder.
"Kilig..."
"You're dumping me. For a wench who made you drink and had sex with you."
"That's not how it went, Kilig," he chided. "Anyway, I'm a man of honor, and I won't refuse paternity duty."
"Of course not, but what about me?" Kilig's voice was sour. "What am I to you? Your apprentice? A surrogate son? What?"
My one and only love. But if he said it out loud, Kilig would never let him go. He sighed.
"Kilig, the age gap between us..."
"I don't care!" Kilig screamed, jumping up to be in Saif's face. "You're not my father, all right? You're the most wonderful man that ever lived and I love you..."
Saif hugged him, pressing Kilig's face against his chest to quieten him.
"Hush, Kilig. That's enough. I had warned you. Assassins are lonely people. That's why I'm giving back my weapons and my name, and I'm resigning from the guild. I wish you a long and happy life."
"Not without you!" Kilig moaned before starting to sob against him, drenching his tunic. "Saif, please, don't leave me..."
It took Saif all the strength and control he had learned through the years to pull Kilig away from him. He rose from the bed and gathered his things in silence, trying to ignore Kilig's desperate cries.
He exited the room and closed the door behind him. He stood still with his eyes closed, begging Kilig's forgiveness, then gulped down the lump in his throat.
He left his weapons in the armory, but didn't have the courage to stop by Talwar's office and tell him he was leaving on such a short notice. He'd ask Mirabella to write a letter for him before they left Godwalkar.
***
Mirabella couldn't believe how many things she had amassed in almost six years in Godwalkar, but when the time came to say good-bye to Ramya, and even with the help of Saif, she realized they'd need a cart to go back north.
Without flinching, Saif went to the market and bought a cart and a donkey to pull it while Mirabella thanked Ramya for everything she'd done for her. Then she climbed on the cart with Hakeem and their things, and Saif led the donkey through the streets of Godwalkar towards the northern road.
"Will you ride in the cart with us?" Mirabella asked when they were in open country, with the road going up and down the hills around Godwalkar.
"I don't want to tire the donkey," Saif answered without turning to look at her. "Besides, I'm used to walking. I bought the cart for you and the child."
"I can walk too," she grumbled, holding Hakeem closer on their rickety means of transportation.
Saif flashed a smile at her. "I know, but Hakeem's legs are too short to keep up. I'd have carried him on my shoulders all the way if we hadn't bought the cart."
"Can I ride you, Dad?" Hakeem asked, hopeful, straightening on the seat.
Saif chuckled. "Not today. But don't worry, we have a few days of journey ahead, when you see our donkey slow down, it means you've become too heavy for him."
"Saif, he's five and a big boy, you can't carry him," Mirabella chided. Still, she was touched by Saif's thoughtfulness.
Saif stopped and when the cart caught up with him, still pulled on by the donkey, he grabbed Hakeem to put him on his shoulders. The child screamed with joy as he resumed walking next to the donkey.
"Now, little lookout, keep an eye on the road ahead," he said. "If you see bandits or outlaws, kick me, and I'll put you back on the cart so I can defend you and your mom."
"Yes, Dad!" Hakeem answered cheerfully.
Mirabella smiled against her will. She knew the road was safe – unless things had changed in six years. Safer than further north, if her king was still warring with the Varians. She listened to Saif and Hakeem's chatter, feeling warm inside.
She knew Saif didn't love her. But he'd stand by her side and help her raise the son of a healing session gone a little too far. She was glad she had kept the baby and he'd survived infancy.
She'd written the letter for Talwar, where Saif had resigned from the guild "giving back" his assassin's name. She had no idea of what that meant, but Saif hadn't mentioned any other name for her to call him, so she'd keep calling him Saif. Maybe that wasn't his assassin's name anyway.
And knowing that he was proficient with weapons made her feel more secure. The Blackmore Kingdom was at war, albeit mostly on the border river. Her small village had lost men, called to the king's service, but Saif was probably too old to be recruited.
After an hour or so, Saif put Hakeem back on the cart and drank from their flask
, since the day was getting hot. Mirabella handed him and Hakeem some cookies as they continued north. She looked forward to being back home.
5. Guisarme
Guisarme woke up in anguish. She'd heard a desperate cry for help and now felt the emptiness of loss in the pit of her stomach. The bond was gone. Francisca was probably dead.
As she realized this, her eyes popped open and she gasped. The pearly light of dawn filtered through the window and the building, the seat of the Guild, was quiet. Which didn't mean much – the Assassins' Guild was always a quiet place since its members might need to sleep during the day.
She jumped off her pallet, her heart racing. Something had happened to her acharya. She rushed through the empty, darkened corridors, but Talwar was not in his office. She went downstairs to the canteen, and saw only three people were already up – or maybe didn't go to sleep at all in the case of the raven-haired young man who sat nursing a goblet of ale, looking dejected.
Startled to see him alone, Guisarme joined him.
"Kilig! Where's Acharya Saif?"
"Dunno," was the somber reply.
"Kilig, it's important! I think Francisca failed her mission!" she insisted frantically.
His brown eyes looked at her from behind the bangs.
"I don't know where he is, Guisarme," he said slowly.
"He didn't take you with him?" Incredulous she shook her head and slumped on a stool. "I wish Francisca had taken me with her on this assignment!" She started biting her nails, frowning in concentration.
She knew her relationship with Francisca wasn't the same as the bond Saif and Kilig shared. Francisca had taught her the trade, given her her assassin's name – Guisarme the Throwing Spear – and then they'd parted, although there was still a strong bond between them. The three years of training were in the past, but their special relationship made any chance meeting a joyful reunion.
Kilig had finished his training a couple of years earlier, but didn't seem ready to cut the umbilical cord with his acharya. The adoration in his eyes whenever he looked at Saif was obvious, and Guisarme knew they were lovers and worked together.
"He's not on a mission," Kilig said, interrupting her musings.
"He's not?" She was startled. "And where is he?"
Saif & Kilig Page 7
