Never Let Go (Devil's Chariots Motorcycle Club Book 2)

by Miranda Banks

  “I'm not sure that it's the right time,” Aaron said.

  “When the fuck is the right time? We gonna wait ‘til he wifes her ass? She'll be his and Dan's old lady at the same fucking time.” Stan was pissed, and he was going to make sure something happened.

  “Maybe not at the home of a widow in the middle of the night?” Aaron used sarcasm to make his point.

  “No, we just let our brothers do that alone,” Stan retorted and walked over to a table away from the group. Stan began to wonder if maybe he should take care of the problem all by himself. Problem was they'd make him pay for breaking an oath, but that slimy sack of shit could make plays on his brother's old lady and nobody gave a fuck. Those priorities were all sorts of fucked up. Honoring a brother should be far more important. If they tried to pull that whole Johnny is also a brother bit, Stan was likely to punch one of them.

  Aaron caught the comment before Stan stepped aside. He knew that many of them were pissed off. Hell, sometimes he was pissed off. Johnny just kept throwing his hands up at the club and all that they stood for. He acted as though their beliefs and rules and oaths were nothing—as if his brotherhood and relationship with Dan meant nothing.

  However, Aaron had seen the look in his eyes. He didn't mean it to be this way. It just happened to him, and he wasn't sure what to do about it. Hell, they had to give him some credit for trying. He'd went when they sent him. No goodbyes. No nothing.

  Obviously that hadn't worked because he opted to come back, which meant that there wasn't a lot they could really do about any of it. Nothing he'd want to do anyway.

  “Any ideas?” Aaron asked and waited.

  ***

  Johnny paced. Beth had fallen asleep on the recliner. She barely looked at him, but she assured him that everything was fine. How the hell is it fine if a person can't look at another person?

  He couldn't really think about that at that moment. He knew the club knew by now that he was gone. They'd assume this was where he went. So it was only a matter of time before they came here to confront him. Then what? What were they going to do now that he'd disobeyed them and bailed on a job to boot?

  They were going to be livid and would feel betrayed. Plus, they would speculate that Johnny had betrayed his brother and best friend in the worst possible way. On top of that, he had bailed on an important job. One they'd trusted him with, even with their skepticism of his loyalty. That alone would create a chaos he didn't want or need. However, being in the home with Dan's old lady when he wasn't supposed to be...it would change things in a way Johnny wasn't sure he was ready for.

  Beth moaned slightly, as she twisted around in the chair. He wanted to go to her and wrap his arms around her, but she seemed to need her space in that moment; so, he was leaving her alone. However, he wanted to feel her in his arms. He needed that—before the family he had always known decided to show him the consequences of doing so.

  ***

  “He will be expecting it,” Aaron stated, hoping that the guys would listen and not insist on going.

  “I don't give a damn what he's expecting. He should be expecting it,” Stan yelled.

  “We will go.” Phil settled the debate.

  Since he was treated as leader, it made sense that his say would be final. No one, not even Aaron, argued. The matter was settled, and they were going to head over to Bethany's and handle the situation.

  “Finally, someone with common sense.” Stan snorted, as he faked a laugh.

  “We will go in the morning,” Phil stated. “Not tonight.” Everyone looked at him, and he nodded. “It's the middle of the night. Our bikes would draw attention and cause Bethany further problems if neighbors worried or complained. We don't want harm for a brother's widow—no matter who may be in her home at the moment,” Phil explained and saw everyone agree silently.

  Aaron watched facial expressions, as they nodded in agreement with their leader, and he wondered why he'd never been able to garner that kind of respect. The guys liked him alright, but they certainly didn't bend to his wishes.

  “Sure. Let's worry about the whore,” Stan smirked and turned to walk away.

  “Stan!” Phil caught him before he got very far.

  “Yes?” he asked, turning on his heels.

  “We respect our brothers, including fallen ones,” Phil stated. “There will be no name calling of Dan's old lady.” With that, Phil turned and left the room, stating that they were to meet at 8 a.m. in the parking lot.

  ***

  Noise. He heard noise. It was enough to startle him awake, but not enough for him to identify it once he was. However, there was something about it that started the rapid heartbeat. He felt the sweat bead against his forehead. A dull roar. One that was muffled, but seemed to be increasing in sound.

  It took him a minute to adjust to the being awake part and realize where he was and what was going on. Beth's. He had apparently fallen asleep on the couch himself. She was still sleeping. The sun was shining, but dimly. It was early, but Johnny couldn't quite pinpoint a time. He knew that he'd been sitting there about five in the morning, contemplating wrapping his arms around Beth. But how long had he been out?

  Bikes. It was the sound of bikes. Not just one or two bikes, but a lot of them. They were coming. The club was coming to find him and confront him. At her fucking house. He wasn't ready, and he certainly didn't know how the fuck he was going to wake Beth up to tell her that she was being invaded by a motorcycle club.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Bethany watched as Johnny paced. She was still trying to jolt her mind into being awake so that she could process all of the stuff he was saying, but so far it wasn't working. Being pregnant and trying to give up caffeine wasn't very conducive to being functional.

  “You want me to lie?” It was all she could seem to make of the things he was saying.

  “Not lie,” Johnny said emphatically. “Just omit some details.”

  In Bethany's world, omitting details was lying. It was just the safer way of lying, meaning you had an out on a technicality; but, it was still lying.

  The sound of the bikes was getting closer, and she saw the beads of sweat forming at Johnny's brow. He was seriously worried and upset. How could she not do what he asked of her? But then again, she wondered why there was a need to. Was this club of guys that important? Did they mean more than her?

  “And what am I omitting?” she asked sarcastically.

  Truth was, she felt a stab of pain as they talked about it. It was almost like he was telling her she wasn't good enough and had to be a secret. He loved her, but no one could know.

  “Just the part where there's anything but platonic friendship between us,” he stated, and the knife in her gut twisted deeper.

  ***

  He saw her reaction and knew she was hurt. God, he wanted to comfort her, but he couldn't. Not now. He knew that Beth didn't understand or fully grasp the rules of the club or the consequences of what he'd done. Someday, maybe, he could explain.

  However, as the roar of the bikes got closer, he knew this wasn't the day. Today, he had to face the consequences of the decisions he had made and would continue to make because in the end it seemed it had no real choice. His heart had decided to make that call for him.

  “Maybe that's all there should be,” Beth mumbled.

  Johnny heard her, but chose to pretend he didn't. It was her anger talking. They'd discuss it, and everything else, later.

  The bikes were on her street, and it sounded as though most of them had opted to come after him. He hoped the neighbors didn't say anything. Beth had too much to deal with already and didn't need even further fallout from this whole stupid mess.

  As the bikes approached the house and began to quiet, he smiled at the woman he loved. This was it. The confrontation he had feared. She looked angry more than anything. Johnny hoped and prayed that she stuck to his story, but he wasn't very confident. She wasn't happy with him.

  He felt his heart race until the moment he heard
the knock. That was when it seemed to stop beating.

  ***

  “Hello, Bethany,” Phil spoke softly. “Is Johnny here by chance?”

  The guys watched, as she stepped back and opened the door to welcome them in. Chris shook his head without being noticed. He had hoped that Johnny would be gone. Or that they'd pretend he wasn't here. Something. Anything that could stop this.

  “Phil,” Johnny nodded in the direction of his brothers, “Aaron, Chris, Stan.” He stopped with Stan, mainly because he saw the anger on his face.

  The guys made their way into the living room, and everyone found a place to sit, even if it meant the floor.

  “I hope you are doing well, Bethany,” Phil asked, as he grabbed the recliner that had held her only moments before.

  “For the most part I am okay,” Beth answered. “Would you guys like something to drink?”

  Everyone told Beth what they wanted, and Chris volunteered to go into the kitchen and help her. He knew better than to stay for what was about to happen. It was pointless. No one cared about his opinion, and he had a shitty way of presenting it anyway.

  As they walked out of the room, he heard Stan begin the conversation that they had delayed.

  “So Johnny,” he snapped, “what the fuck makes it okay to betray your oath and your job to bed a brother's old lady?”

  ***

  Johnny had to force himself not to react to Stan's callous and cold accusation. He knew his brothers, and Stan was always the rudest and most outdated, still living by the old school club rules and thoughts.

  Besides, if he reacted in anger or hostility, then it would escalate what was already a problem. He wanted to calm things down before it got there.

  “You assume a lot Stan,” Johnny said. Lying wasn't on his agenda. He didn't want to tell a direct lie to his brothers, but he didn't want them to know all of the facts. Omitting. Safer for everyone.

  “I assume you left your job,” Stan began and the other guys nodded. “I assume you are here. I assume that you were told to do the job and not be here.”

  Johnny sat there for a minute, trying to decide how to approach this. Stan didn't say anything that wasn't true. He had left his job. He was at Beth's. He wasn't supposed to be at Beth's.

  “That doesn't mean all of the things you might think it does,” he answered. “But you are right on those points.” Johnny had to acknowledge the facts, or they might not believe the rest. It was in his best interest anyway. It wasn't like he could deny any of it.

  “So then what does it mean?” Aaron spoke up, hoping to diminish Stan's role.

  ***

  Beth could hear them in the other room even with Chris' rambling beside her. They were making coffee and tea and glasses of water for the guys in the club. She was trying to keep herself busy, but the sound of that hateful asshole in the next room couldn't be drowned out.

  “I don't understand it myself,” Chris said out of nowhere, and Beth tried to figure out what he was talking about. “The guys,” his head nodded towards the living room. “I don't understand why this is such a big deal.”

  Beth wanted to confide in Chris, and she felt like she could, like he would understand her situation and be supportive. However, she didn't. Even if he knew it was wrong, he was still bound by the same oath as the rest of them. She had learned many times over that the oath would be adhered to, regardless of consequences.

  “It's loyalty,” she answered, as if she didn't think it was the dumbest thing on the planet.

  “Yes, but who can help who they love?” He smiled at her.

  Everything in her wanted to talk and admit her love. She wanted to tell him all about her and Johnny; but, she knew better. Besides, Johnny had asked her to play a role. Omit. Lie.

  “Love? That's a bit extreme don't you think?” she felt her entire body cringe at the lie.

  “So it's not love?” Chris seemed surprised and disappointed.

  “I'm in a bad place and having a friend is important,” Beth stated the obvious. “Don't try to twist it around in your head,” she snapped.

  Walking back out of the kitchen with a handful of glasses, Beth felt bad. Not just for lying about her need for Johnny, but also for being rude to Chris. She felt like he was the only one in this mess who was on her side, and she'd talked down to him as if he were stupid. It wasn't done to be mean but because she had to. Someday maybe he'd understand.

  ***

  She was lying and Chris knew it. She wasn't just looking for or needing a friend. She was kind of rude about it, but he understood. It was the way this had to be. She couldn't trust any of them. They would destroy her and what mattered the most.

  Chris wanted to help support her and back her up. He wanted her and Johnny to be able to live happily. She was pregnant, and she needed someone who was going to be there for her. Someone who would love her.

  Standing in Beth's kitchen, Chris tried to decide how he could help. Part of him believed he could walk into the living room and present a case for the two of them that would leave the club with no choice but to accept it all. But he knew how he was. He'd stutter and mumble, and they'd treat him like he didn't matter at all.

  He was going to try. He was going to take a stand and do something right for a change. He'd rather they attack him than to go after Johnny and Beth.

  Chris gave himself a pep talk, picked up the cups he was supposed to carry, and headed towards the living room—ready to take on the world. Or at least the world that he knew. However, just as he walked in, prepared to speak his mind, Phil's phone rang, and the room was silenced.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Johnny knew something was up by the look on Phil's face. The way his jawline tensed and his mouth twisted slightly. Moments after answering, Phil took his phone and stepped outside of the house. That left everyone else to entertain themselves. Johnny hoped they did so by speculating on the conversation and not on his relationship with Beth.

  He knew that he'd upset her by asking her to lie. It wasn't a lie, really; but, in her eyes it was. Shame. Embarrassment. All of the typical feminine emotions. The problem was that it wasn't a typical request, and they weren't in a typical situation.

  In fact, this was beyond anything he'd ever imagined having to face. Truth be known, Johnny had never imagined himself being serious about any one person. He wasn't that type. The club girls were more his thing. Love ‘em and leave ‘em.

  But Beth had done something to him, and while he didn't regret it, he also wasn't too fond of the end result—especially since that end result meant that he had to face the wrath of the guys he considered family.

  Watching her gave him a way to occupy the time. Apparently, his brothers had decided to postpone the discussion until Phil returned. He was thankful for that much.

  She was sitting in a corner, and she looked like she'd rather be anywhere else. There was a smile on her face, but it was fake. He could see the pain in her eyes. The heartache. It tugged at a place in him that he didn't know existed a year ago.

  Beth had been through so much. She'd had to bury her husband, and she'd known that it was because he was in the club. She'd had to face life alone. Then, she found out she was pregnant. Now, the same club she blamed for losing Dan was causing her to lose another. His heart ached at the pain he was causing her. However, there wasn't very much that he could do about it in the moment. The guys needed time to accept them before he tried to force it.

  ***

  Chris couldn't help but watch them both. Phil was outside on the phone, and no one was really talking; so, he observed. What most would have seen was a woman who was smiling and friendly and a man who was in the spotlight. However, Chris saw more.

  Beth wasn't happy. She was smiling and friendly—probably because she was taught to be that way regardless. Her eyes showed sorrow, and she wouldn't look at Johnny.

  He, however, looked openly anguished—like his heart was breaking—and he couldn't take his eyes off of Beth.

  What Chris
saw was love. Looking at his brothers, he wanted to ask them what the fuck they had against love. However, it wasn't his place; so, he kept his mouth shut and sat there hoping to figure out a way to help them both.

  ***

  Stan wanted to follow Phil outside and ask what the fucking hold up was; but, he knew better. It was not his place; but, he was just tired of sitting in this fucking house, waiting on something to happen.

  Back in the day, there was no way the club would have acted like this. It was a bunch of fucking pussy ass men he was working with—the new one especially. He was going to be a problem where this situation was concerned. He was too soft.