by J. S. Luxor
Boxed Set
FOUR SHADES OF RECOVERY
BOOKS 1 – 4
Healing Heartbreak Series
by J.S. Luxor
Copyright © 2013 J.S. Luxor
All rights reserved.
Luxor Press. Kindle Edition.
Legal Notices: This eBook is offered for your personal use. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. No portion of these materials may be reproduced in any manner without the expressed written consent of the author.
Cover Design by M.S. Luxor.
Cover photo: Copyright © fotolia.com
Except for the original material written by the author, all songs, song titles and lyrics contained in this book are the property of the respective songwriters and copyright holders.
TABLE OF CONTENTS – BOOK 1
Chapter One – Return of the Native
Chapter Two – Day of Reckoning
Chapter Three – Demons
Chapter Four – Psychological Troubles
Chapter Five – Revelations
Chapter Six – Confrontation
Chapter Seven – Healing
BOOK 2
Chapter One – Dating Dilemma
Chapter Two – Encounters
Chapter Three – Stalker
Chapter Four – Escape
Chapter Five – Michael
Chapter Six – Accidents
Chapter Seven – Manipulations
BOOK 3
Chapter One – Interventions
Chapter Two – Payback
Chapter Three – Seduction
Chapter Four – Confession
Chapter Five – Transfer
Chapter Six – Discovery
Chapter Seven – Maui Madness
Chapter Eight – Plans and Promises
BOOK 4
Chapter One – The Proposal
Chapter Two – Marissa Unhinged
Chapter Three – The Sex Room
Chapter Four – BDSM Issues
Chapter Five – The Eagle
Chapter Six – Frazier Clan
Chapter Seven – Death and Taxes
Chapter Eight – Roseanne
Chapter Nine – Death Wish
Chapter Ten – Resolutions
FOUR SHADES OF RECOVERY
Healing Heartbreak Series – Book 1
by J.S. Luxor
Copyright © 2013 J.S. Luxor
All rights reserved.
Luxor Press. Kindle Edition.
Legal Notices: This eBook is offered for your personal use. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. No portion of these materials may be reproduced in any manner without the expressed written consent of the author.
Cover Design by M.S. Luxor.
Cover photo: Copyright © fotolia.com
Except for the original material written by the author, all songs, song titles and lyrics contained in this book are the property of the respective songwriters and copyright holders.
Chapter One – Return of the Native
Matt
I’m attending yet another conference on solar powered PDAs. It’s the only thing that gets me excited these days. I’ve heard many good ideas about the latest tech designs at the gathering and my team wants to move ahead with a template. I need something to delve into with focus. A project like this will distract me from my empty shell of a body as well as my fractured ego and heart.
That organ, my heart, feels like a stone since Megan left me nearly one year ago today. We’ve had no contact during this time though I’ve tried to lure her into a visit or, perhaps a conversation, numerous times. My brother, Roger, thinks I need to get laid. I know that won’t help, as sex without love no longer fulfills me on any level. She’s ruined me for any of that BDSM shit that I used to rely upon for release.
At the end of the day, there’s a wine and fruit or cheese reception. I’m absently drinking my second glass of cabernet and chatting with a young man who has insights about solving receptivity problems on the solar phones. He may be my next hire. I’m half listening to him in an attempt to be polite. However, I really want to get wasted tonight to dull the pain in my poor, neglected psyche. Why can’t I let her go? I’ve tried so hard to stop myself from dwelling on her but the images of our last day together haunt me; taunt me.
She left me. Just walked out. Shortly after I declared my undying love for her. Perhaps Megan couldn’t handle the idea of a committed relationship with me. Maybe it was the concept of loving another person that drove her from me. Poor broken Megan. I thought I could erase the pain of her abusive childhood. What a fool I was to imagine that my care and mentoring would heal her. I conjure up an image of her lovely face on the day she packed up and left me. It reflected nothing but fear and possibly, revulsion. My life hasn’t been the same since she took off. I keep busy but I’m just going through the motions. I’m dead inside.
I take another swallow of wine as I reflect on my broken angel. I look across the room and note that my security man, Jared Rush, keeps signaling me. Just as I’m about to inquire about his concerns, I feel that familiar electricity. There’s a hand on the small of my back and it’s firing all the endorphins in my brain. It’s the most soothing touch I’ve felt in a year. I never want this jolt to stop. Perhaps this feeling is due to the wine I’ve been drinking. If so, I need to order a case of it, perhaps buy the vineyard.
I turn toward the source of the electrical charge. I nearly shudder from shock when I discover that the spark emanates from the very person I’ve been questing after for the past year. It’s really Megan. She looks at me with those adorable blue eyes and smiles sweetly. Her dark hair cascades down her arms to the middle of her back. She’s beautiful. How can someone so psychologically damaged appear so innocent and lovely?
“Matt, it’s great to see you again,” she claims. Her dusky voice sounds exactly like the one from my dreams. It’s wonderful to hear her speak. My body responds quickly to her presence and it wants more.
“Megan, what’re you doing in Portland? …Why are you attending this conference?” Is about all that I can manage to ask. She’s so enticing in this moment of contact.
“I’ve moved back to the city of flowers. I’m not attending the conference. I called your office and they informed me of your presentation at this conference today.” She smiles warmly again and all I want to do is hold her. Yes…hold her, love her, kiss her…forever. She’s dressed well and looks incredibly strong and healthy.
“You…came here to see me?” I’m incredulous that Megan sought me out after all this time. “Why?”
“Matt, I missed you baby.” She pulls herself into my side with a warm hug. The close contact with Megan sends every synapse in my body into action. I feel complete for the first time in ages. There’s no doubt in my mind that she’s my drug and I must have her.
By this time, Rush has made his way to us. He’s concerned and anxious about Megan’s presence since he knows our shared history.
“Sir, can I assist you in any way?” Rush asks in a manner that implies I could be in danger. Only he knows how desperately broken I became when Megan left me last year. I want to command him to remove her arm from my body. If I had a rational mind or body, I would ask Rush to escort her from the reception. How dare she disrupt my life again. How dare she make me feel again!
I’m a fool though. Who am I kidding? What sort of empty life have I been living for the past year? I look at Megan and melt. My arm reaches out and pulls her body to mine. It feels heavenly, satisfying and wonderful to touch her again. Oh yes. The rush of endorphins from my brain sends my body into a state of utter pleasure.
“No, I’ll be
fine,” I assure him, knowing nothing of the sort is true. She’ll ruin me but I can’t resist her siren’s call. My hand wraps around her slender shoulder and I feel her warmth. I’m already melting and possibly turning into liquid desire as we embrace. When I turn to look into her eyes, the bond between us becomes palpable. Oh. My. Stars.
“Let’s get out of here,” Megan suggests as she tugs on the waist of my pants with the sweetest and most seductive smile. She looks even better than I remember. “Do you have a room here at the hotel?”
“Actually, I’ve rented the penthouse in order to interview potential job candidates. Would you like to come up and talk? Tell me what you’ve been doing for the past year.”
I cannot believe she’s here. What the hell am I doing inviting her to my room? I’m doomed if I find myself alone with her again. Of course, that’s exactly what I want. Perhaps Rush should chaperone us in the penthouse. How can this mere 5’5”, 23-year-old wisp of a woman turn me, a multimillionaire CEO of the largest company in Portland, into a mass of quivering desire?
Megan chuckles softly and touches my arm. “Oh, Matt, talking can come later. I’ve missed you so much. You look irresistible and so good. You’re so handsome. What I want, right now, is you.”
She’s saying all the right words. The words that I’ve imagined in countless dreams of reconciliation that I’ve experienced for the last several months. I look at her in disbelief. She kisses my cheek and pets the side of my face. I pull her into the side hallway of the reception hall and look deeply into her wide, needy eyes. I cannot believe she’s back, at last.
Megan chooses that moment to launch herself at me. Her tongue finds mine and I’m lost to our kiss. It’s all I can do keep from ripping her clothes off in the corridor. My breathing accelerates as our connection deepens. We stumble to the elevators in a haze. I don’t care if Rush and half of the conventioneers see our display. She’s all I’ve ever wanted for the longest time. She’s the only living soul who can quench my fire. How have I ceded all the control to her? That is, her body, mind, and being.
It’s no use trying to resist. I’m like a man who’s gone too long without water, food or sustenance. Somehow, we find ourselves outside my room. I fumble with my key card while she pulls on the lapels of my jacket like an eager child and kisses me. Once we’re in the privacy of my suite, she tugs my tie down and I assist her in removing it. Next, comes my jacket. It’s pushed to the floor in a matter of seconds. The feeling of her hands on my chest and arms sends me into ecstasy. She kisses my neck and then begins unbuttoning my white shirt. Megan’s as eager as I am to make love.
My hands seem to be wandering over her body with abandon. She’s so compact and fit. I feel the taut muscles of her derriere and move up to her slender waistline while kissing her neck and shoulders. When my hands explore the outline of her breasts, she lets out a sigh of pleasure that instantly hardens me. We stand and massage each other’s torsos for several minutes while simultaneously kissing. It’s the most soothing feeling I’ve experienced in so long. I want her so desperately and there’s no turning back. My body’s doing all the talking right now and what it’s telling me is exactly what I want to hear.
Her small hands have now worked my shirt off and they’re heading for my belt. Once she’s removed those items, I’m her slave. I lift her in my arms and lower our bodies onto my generous-sized bed. I shove my designer pants off in a flurry as she reclines against the pillows on top of my duvet. She’s still fully dressed. I move over to where she’s sitting and assist in the removal of her dress. It’s snug, expensive and form fitting. I start at the hem and slowly tug it up and over her head. She’s cooperating and wiggles off the last few inches. Her dazzling smile says she’s ready for me. I’m like a thermonuclear missile that’s zoned in on its target.
I’m dressed only in my undershirt and boxers by now. She’s wearing designer underwear and looks delectable. I pull back the duvet and push it to the end of the bed. I position myself in between her legs and place both arms on either side of her chest. Is my Megan really writhing beneath me with sexual desire, on my bed, at this moment? Perhaps I’ve become delusional in the last week or so. If this is a delusion, bring it on.
Having Megan in my bed feels so right. Our bodies like making contact again. We kiss and touch each other’s face for a bit before I slowly remove her bra and then my undershirt. The connection between our naked chests sends sparks through my system that drive me forward toward one goal. I lick and suck her full and lovely breasts and nipples while she gently rubs her hands on my back and shoulders in encouragement.
She moans with excitement while I get us both further stimulated. Megan moves from side to side with need. Her legs wrap around my waist. This location is exactly what I’ve dreamed of for the past year or so. Oh, yes!
“Let’s get really naked, baby,” she urges and pushes my boxers off with the toes of her feet before she wraps both legs around my waist. She’s still wearing a thong. The thought of dislodging her legs from my body disturbs me. So I merely rip her sexy cover off and toss it to the side of my bed. My member pokes up solidly between us and searches for its familiar connection. We’ve made love hundreds of times in the past; it never gets old.
“Oh, Matt, you feel so good,” she gushes as she guides me into the right location with her hand. She’s certainly wet and ready. I move into her opening smoothly and gaze down at her face. She looks angelic and thrilled as I quickly fill her to the hilt. Our bodies seem to know each other better than our minds do at this juncture. Our merge feels like absolute perfection.
“Megan. I’ve missed you so, baby,” I utter. I want to stop those words from escaping from my mouth because I might regret them when we’re done here but they come tumbling out nonetheless.
“Same here, Matt. You feel incredible inside me,” she oozes and bucks up toward me for even more intimacy.
We begin our lovemaking slowly as I rock her up and down beneath me. Her eyes close and her mouth opens slightly as she clenches me within her and lifts her hips to meet my thrusts. I pick up the pace of our encounter. She throws her head back on the pillow. I want her to beg me for more. She doesn’t disappoint me. Her nails now skim the skin of my shoulders. They feel sensual and stimulating.
“Matt, please go faster,” she urges me and runs her wondrous fingers down my back. I comply and thrust into her repeatedly. Within minutes, I note that she’s tensing beneath me and ready to let go. I push my elbows into the mattress beside her and slam with one last effort into her lovely body. Megan’s enjoying every last inch of our reunion.
She screams my name in delight as she comes undone around me. “Oh, Matt, yes,” she utters with abandon as an orgasm consumes her. I smile with utter satisfaction as her release triggers my own. I spurt my juices into her with full force and fall with exhaustion onto her exquisite frame when I spasm.
I kiss her neck and face repeatedly as I recover from my quick trip to nirvana. Then I roll off and prop myself beside her. I’m sure my delighted smile looks ridiculous. She turns on her side and looks at me with absolute joy in her wide eyes.
“We’re wonderful at this Matt. I’ve missed you so much, baby,” she gushes with absolute conviction.
“Megan, you’re magic,” I admit and then pet her lovely face and hair like a precious gem.
I can’t even begin to describe how amazing I feel at the moment. She’s my sun, moon and stars. Having sex with Megan rates as a self-actualizing experience. No other woman’s touch can even come close. Our chemistry and connection goes beyond the physical; it’s primal. She’s Eve, created only for me. Only Megan fulfills me. I’m a fool to think otherwise.
How can I just let her just waltz back into my bed without any explanation? For the moment, I don’t care. I’m home in her arms, which is exactly where I’ve wanted to be for the past year. We both doze for a while before round number two of our sexual reconciliation begins. Our connection feels better than my dreams.
C
hapter Two – Day of Reckoning
We spend the night making love like never before. I’m shocked by my physical need for this woman. She seems nearly insatiable for me and my sexual skills. I feel like a man who’s been freed from prison. Our hookup feels so right. I hold her precious face between my hands with reverence as I stare into the eyes of the only person who’s ever broken through my armor. My god, I’ve missed her. We fall asleep wrapped in each other’s arms. I haven’t slept this well in a year.
I awaken as dawn breaks and gaze upon the contented looking face of my personal sleeping beauty. My body feels wonderful and sated. I’m delirious with joy at the moment. There is no doubt in my mind that I’m still madly in love with the troubled angel sleeping soundly in my arms. However, I must remember that she has all the power because she broke me this past year.
I call to mind the countless number of times that I woke in the night. I’d been all alone in bed. I’d awaken screaming her name, begging her to return. I can’t forget the emotional pain I suffered at first. That was followed by an overwhelming sense of numbness that I endured this past year. How many evenings did I drink myself into a stupor while looking at photos of us together during happier times?
