“There’s nothing to forgive, Sarah.” Travis was first to speak. “We’re just glad you’re back. Hopefully for good. We’ve all got your back. You’re part of the family, and we protect our own.”
“We were never mad at you, babe,” Sam put in. “Just worried and a bit hurt. But like Trav said, we’re just glad you’re back. Though no one is as glad as Theo,” she added with a lifted brow and a grin.
“Damn right,” he rumbled. “Now what do you say we get my girl out of the hot seat? Cade, don’t you have some sort of embarrassing anecdote?”
For a second Cade looked affronted, before he shrugged. “Well, I did tattoo a vagina on a dude today.”
“Thanks for coming through for me there, buddy.” Theo chuckled.
“What?” Danika exclaimed, looking at her husband with wide eyes.
Cade shrugged, taking a sip of beer. “He didn’t want to commemorate his wife with a standard portrait piece. He said he wanted his favorite part of her on him. I can sort of get behind it,” he mused.
Danny smacked him in the chest. “Don’t even think about it.”
He grinned. “All I have to do is close my eyes, babe.”
I laughed along with everyone else, thinking that despite missing my family, I felt pretty close to home.
Chapter 14
A week had passed and Theo’s assignment was quickly approaching. He’d been training like a beast at headquarters, and I accompanied him more often than not, much to their receptionist’s disdain.
I’d take it personally, but Jenna didn’t seem to take a shine to anyone. She wasn’t even a dog person, which I couldn’t for the life of me understand.
Sam’s and Em’s dogs were like the Talon mascots, and I loved every second of the furry love, missing our dogs back home.
I wandered over to Theo’s desk that afternoon as he sat studying a map of something. “I’m headed to Cade’s shop to visit Danny. I can swing by the grocery store on the way back, too. Okay if I borrow the Yukon?” I asked, referring to Theo’s SUV. I hadn’t bought my own car yet, but so far it hadn’t been an issue.
He looked up distractedly. “Sure, babe. Can you get some more lean ground beef?”
I fought a laugh. “Was planning on it. At this rate, we might as well keep a herd of cattle for slaughter.”
He grinned playfully. “Good thing you like the results.”
“I really do,” I admitted, leaning down to kiss him while taking the keys from his fingers at the same time. “I’ll text you to see if I need to pick you up or just meet you at home.”
He nodded before turning back to whatever it was he’d been working on.
It was a gorgeous day as I drove the thirty minutes to Cade’s shop. There wasn’t much of a distinction between summer and fall weather in Los Angeles, but some of the leaves had changed color and it had grown slightly cooler in the evenings.
The buzz of tattoo guns greeted me as I walked in, finding a smiling Danny behind the front desk.
They’d hired a shop girl, but Danny and Caden just seemed to enjoy spending the time together and she frequently helped out.
“Hey, lady.” She smiled when I walked in.
“Hi.” I grinned, holding up the coffees I’d brought us.
“Bless you.” She sighed dramatically taking a sip. “Liv was up a lot last night. I think she’s in a growth spurt or something.”
I nodded sympathetically. “Maybe not the best time to ask, but do you guys think about another?”
“We’ll probably start trying soon,” she replied. “Liv is nearly two. I’m just not quite ready to be pregnant again.”
“Well, I can’t relate, but that makes sense to me,” I said, as I pulled a stool up next to hers.
“Have you and Theo talked about that sort of thing?” she asked with a lifted brow.
I nearly choked on my coffee. “God, no. We just barely got together.”
“But you can see it,” she surmised with a smile.
“I can see it,” I admitted. “He was amazing with my nephew. He’ll be a great dad.”
“He really will,” she agreed. “How are you feeling about him being gone?”
I sighed. “I’m worried. I know he can handle himself, but I don’t relish the thought of him purposefully putting himself at risk. But it’s what he does. I have to accept it. I think he’s actually having a harder time,” I confided. “He’s really worried about leaving me, so I’m trying to downplay any concern I have. I don’t want him distracted. He needs to be able to focus.”
The last few nights, Theo hadn’t slept well. He’d made me run through how to set the alarm at the condo over and over again. And I’d overheard him talking to Travis about keeping an eye on me while he was gone.
“Neither of you are used to it,” Danny deduced. “It took Sam and Sid a little while to figure that all out. It’s only natural. You guys will, too. And, while he’s gone—we’ve got you. We’ll trade off houses to hang at. You won’t be alone.”
“I don’t want you guys to put yourselves out,” I protested. “I’ll be fine.”
She looked at me sternly. “Don’t argue with me about it. It’s how we roll.”
I smiled. “Yes, ma’am.”
I stayed for a little while longer before saying my goodbyes, needing to head to the store. I walked to the Yukon parked a block down from the shop, spotting a piece of paper stuck on the windshield.
My heart immediately kicked in my chest, but I told myself it was just a parking ticket, or a flyer.
I reached for the paper and unfolded it with shaking fingers.
I see you, bitch.
Instead of the fear I expected, anger and resolve coursed through me as I looked around me. For the first time, I felt that inner lioness Theo had talked about. Evan had followed me. On some level, I’d known he would. And I was done letting him screw with my life. This was my new beginning, and he wasn’t going to ruin it.
I shoved the note into my purse, thinking maybe it’d be useful at some point, and hopped into the SUV. I took a deep fortifying breath, and as calmly as I could, pulled from the parking space and headed for the condo, plans for the grocery store forgotten.
I wrestled with what to do as I drove, my first thought of Theo. It would gut him to leave knowing I was dealing with this, and he was already anxious about it. I was deeply worried about him sacrificing his job for me, or worse yet, being distracted and more in danger because of me.
I was still fraught with worry when I pulled up to the condo, circling the block several times to make sure I hadn’t been followed. I knew I needed to tell Theo. But how could I tell him without him feeling like he couldn’t leave me? Once safely inside with the alarm set, I paced the space, feeling caged with indecision.
When the turn of a key sounded an indeterminable amount of time later, I was in much the same state.
“Babe, what the fuck happened? I’ve been calling and texting,” Theo demanded when he walked in.
Shit. I’d totally forgotten that I had his SUV.
“I’m so sorry,” I rushed to apologize. “I guess I got distracted, and I didn’t have my phone nearby.”
He looked at me in consternation.
“How’d you get home?”
“Ryan,” he muttered, clearly annoyed. He hadn’t been mad at me before and I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. He opened the fridge and I winced.
Shit, I’d forgotten that too.
“I can go to the store now,” I said quickly.
“No, it’s okay.” He shook his head. “It can wait. You sure you’re all right?”
“Fine,” I responded automatically.
“You’re acting weird,” he accused.
I knew I needed to tell him about the note. He deserved to know. I didn’t want to keep secrets from him. I just wanted him to cool off a bit before we talked about it.
“I need to take a quick shower and then I’ll make us some dinner,” I offered, realizing I’d never had lunc
h.
Over dinner we’d talk. I wished like hell he could have a beer or two to relax him, but his training didn’t allow for that.
When I emerged from the shower a little while later, my hair still wet, dressed in cotton shorts and a tank, he was sitting at the bar working on his laptop.
I came up behind him, putting my arms around his broad back and kissing his neck. He gave my arms a quick squeeze and I hoped I was forgiven. “What sounds good?” I asked, wandering over to the fridge.
There were only so many variations of what he could eat these days.
My phone rang in my purse as I was digging through the crisper.
“Babe, seriously, how many people have been trying to get a hold of you today?” he grumbled, reaching for my purse to pull my phone out. “What the fuck is this?” His dark tone left no mystery as to what he’d discovered.
I turned, finding his blistering gaze staring at Evan’s note.
“When and where did you get this?” he demanded.
“Today, near Cade’s shop,” I murmured.
“And you what? Just weren’t going to tell me about this shit?” he thundered. “What the hell, Sarah?”
His anger had me taking a step back. “I was,” I countered.
“When?” he demanded. “You were at the shop hours ago.”
“I just had to process it a bit,” I tried to explain. “I wanted us to talk about it over dinner.”
“This isn’t the kind of shit you process!” he exclaimed. “This is the kind of shit you call me about right away. Fuck!” he bellowed, ripping a hand through his hair and scooting the stool back so abruptly that it fell over with a crash.
I jumped. I’d never thought Theo had the capacity to scare me, but he was doing exactly that.
He turned narrowed eyes to me. “Were you going to tell me about this at all?”
“I was worried about you being distracted on your mission,” I admitted. “But I knew I had to tell you. Can you calm down a little bit?” I requested.
“No, I cannot fucking calm down. My woman was threatened and waited hours to tell me about it—if you were going to tell me about it at all,” he accused.
Angry tears pooled in my eyes. “I admit, I wasn’t sure how to tell you. This is a big job for you. I know you’re already worried about being gone. But I knew I needed to tell you. I’m not lying,” I snapped.
“This is bullshit,” he bellowed, shaking his head as he pulled a drawer open roughly, grabbed a sandwich bag, and slammed the drawer closed. He shoved the note into the bag as I watched his fury-filled movements.
“We’re right where we started, aren’t we?” he demanded.
The accusation stung. I felt as though I’d come a long way, but clearly he didn’t share the sentiment.
“If you think that then we never got anywhere at all,” I replied miserably.
“I’m taking this shit down to headquarters.” He held up the note encased in plastic. “Set the alarm.”
Tears slid down my cheeks at the coldness in his tone. I winced when he slammed the door behind him. For a moment, I stood in the silence that followed, shell-shocked by what had just happened. I’d known he’d be upset, but I was completely unprepared for his wrath.
I headed for the office, dinner forgotten, and created a makeshift bed on the couch that was in there—locking the door behind me.
I wasn’t going to put myself in danger by leaving, but I sure as hell wasn’t sharing a bed with him.
I curled into a ball, too shocked to even cry.
****
I woke up to being lifted up off the couch.
Theo.
I didn’t know what time it was and kept my eyes shut, my body limp, not wanting to talk to him despite it feeling frustratingly good to be nestled in his strong arms.
He placed me gently in bed, and I continued to feign sleep, shifting to the farthest side of the bed with my back to him.
“I know you’re awake, baby.” He sighed as I felt the bed depress with his weight.
I didn’t respond and remained still. I couldn’t talk to him, not yet. I was too angry, too sad, too confused.
“I’ll let you have that, sweetheart. For tonight,” he agreed.
We lay in silence, neither of us sleeping. I knew by the cadence of his breath that he was awake, and there was a large part of me that wanted to roll over into his arms. I knew I’d made mistakes, had things to apologize for, as did he. But my instinct held me rooted in place, caught between forgiveness and anger.
When I woke up the next morning I was in the same position I’d fallen asleep in. It appeared I could even sleep angry. It was early, a quick glance at the clock informed me, which was no wonder considering I’d had no lunch or dinner the day before. It could have very well been my rumbling belly that woke me.
I peeked over my shoulder, finding Theo lying on his back, an arm thrown behind his head as he pondered the ceiling, wide awake.
His head turned toward me, his gaze soft, with none of the anger I’d seen the day before. “Hey,” he rasped.
Damn, why did his morning voice have to be so sexy?
“Don’t you have PT?” I asked dully.
“Not going this morning,” he replied simply. “I’m staying here so we can talk.”
I sat up, my legs hanging over the edge of the bed. “You obviously don’t trust me and you don’t think we’ve made any progress. I thought I’d come a long way, so maybe there isn’t anything to talk about,” I replied bitterly as I looked over my shoulder at him. “You know my first thought when I got that note? It was that I finally felt strong. I didn’t feel scared. I felt pissed. It was empowering. But you made sure to take care of that and managed to scare the hell out of me in the process,” I muttered, standing up, unsure of my destination but wanting out of the room. Away from him. “You should go to PT,” I added, leaving the room and heading to the kitchen.
I was so hungry that I was past the point of knowing what to eat. I stared into the refrigerator, watching Theo out of the corner of my eye as he leaned against the doorframe watching me.
I tensed as he moved in behind me and shut the fridge door. He braced his hands on either side of me, caging me in from behind. “You have come a long way, babe. I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry,” he murmured in my ear.
I remained stiff against him.
“I love you so fucking much, I can barely see straight. The thought of you being in danger makes me insane. And knowing that you waited to tell me…. I want to be the man you rely on. I need to be,” he demanded.
“You are,” I insisted. “I wasn’t trying to keep anything from you. I just didn’t want to sweep into Talon and turn your world upside down.”
“You are my world,” he replied without delay, turning me gently so that my back was pressed to the fridge and I was looking up at him. “I need to know the second something upsets you—the second you’re something less than happy. Whether it has to do with Evan or not. I’m your man, it’s my job to make it right.” He crouched slightly so that we were at eye level. “And baby, Talon or not, that’s the most important job I’ll ever have.”
“You were so mad,” I whispered. “I’ve never seen you like that.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever been like that,” he admitted. “I’ve never had anything in my life I cared about this much. But I’ll rein it in. I’m sorry I scared you. You know I’d never hurt you, don’t you?”
“I do,” I replied truthfully. “I wish you had heard me out before getting so angry, but I’m sorry I waited to tell you.”
He nodded, concern shining in his eyes. “Are we okay?”
I wasn’t entirely sure. “I think so.”
He smiled. “We’ll get back to know so. For now, let’s get you something to eat. The sounds your stomach is making are freaky.”
Chapter 15
Squeals of delight and water splashing met my ears later that afternoon as I lay out by Sam and Sid’s pool. Theo, Sid, and Ryan w
ere all in the pool with Hudson and Olivia, while Sam, Danny, Em, and I caught some sun.
“Everything all right with you two?” Sam asked me, her brow rising above her sunglasses.
I grimaced. “Are we that obvious?”
She laughed. “No, but I’m nosy and observant.”
“You don’t say,” Danny put in with a dry smile.
“We’re okay.” I sighed, watching as Theo threw a squealing Hudson up in the air. With his muscles rippling in the sun and an ear-to-ear grin on his face, his joy at playing with Hudson was obvious, making me all the more smitten with him. “We had our first fight, and I don’t think either of us knows exactly how to get over it. We talked, but things feel a bit off still.”
“Sex.” Sam nodded. “If you already talked, you need to have make-up sex.”
I blushed crimson.
“Wait. You haven’t?” Sam gasped.
“We’re taking it slow.”
“Slow can be good,” Emerly put in with a soft smile.
“Definitely,” Sam rushed to agree. “I didn’t mean to suggest otherwise. I was just surprised.”
“It’s fine,” I assured her. And it was. Sam had a tendency to say exactly what was on her mind. It always came from a good place, and I’d always found it refreshing.
Theo handed Hudson off to his dad and pulled himself up and out of the pool. The ripple of muscle in his arms and shoulders had me ogling the man I got to call mine.
He stood over me, purposefully dripping cool water on my bikini-clad body. I shrieked as he leaned over me with a grin. “Don’t get too much sun, sweetheart.” He shook his wet head over my chest. “Maybe we should cool you off.” He lifted me into his arms, carrying me purposefully toward the pool.
“Theo Armstrong. Don’t you dare!” I sputtered, a second before we were airborne and I found myself submerged in cool water. I hit the surface gasping, and splashed him. “You are in so much trouble!”
He pulled me close, wrapping my legs around his hips. “I think I might enjoy that.”
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