Fun can be a huge tool to make yourself feel better. Find something—anything—that you like to do. Whether you make time for it only once a week, twice a week, or once a month, give yourself that release. Give yourself something to look forward to. It doesn’t have to be stuff that some people think are crazy, like all my skiing and boarding. Read a book, watch a movie, play a board game with friends, whatever. It’s easy to get into a routine of taking care of all your responsibilities, all the chores we all have to do to get by. Break it up with some fun.
Most important, never give in to self-pity. Don’t waste time or energy feeling bad about things that have happened to you and that you can’t change. More than once, people have asked me, “If you could travel back in time, would you change what happened to you on the day you were blown up in Iraq?” Most of them are shocked when I say, “No.”
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: what happened to me that day was not a tragedy. I don’t see it that way, and that’s what matters. For me, that was just another event in my life, like getting married, or getting my first tattoo, or going to my first baseball game. That experience is part of what made me the person I am, and I like who I am. I don’t want to change my past. I’d like to be whole-bodied again, but not if it means erasing my life and giving up who I am.
Thanks to the doors that were opened by my status as a wounded veteran, I’ve been to some amazing places, met wonderful people, and done a number of really cool things.
Since coming home from Iraq, I’ve been on the cover of Esquire magazine, thrown out the first pitch at a Chicago Cubs game, driven in a NASCAR race, gone white-water rafting in the Grand Canyon, met James Gandolfini and Gary Sinise, and acted on television and in an Oscar-nominated feature film. I’ve lived my life on my own terms. How many people ever get to say that? How many people get the chance to live the way that I have?
I regret nothing. I love my life.
Now I need to get heavy on you for a second. A big part of making this idea of mine work in real life is being responsible about how we have fun. I believe that my fun shouldn’t come at someone else’s expense. My right to do what I want ends at the point where I start screwing up someone else’s fun. This goes way beyond not bothering your neighbor by turning up your stereo too loud. What I’m talking about here is taking a second to think about how the things you do affect other people, not just next door but around the world.
I like driving ATVs, and as vehicles go, they’re pretty fuel-efficient. But if it was possible for me to have just as much fun riding a quad without burning gasoline, I would do it. If there was an all-electric ATV that performed as well as the one I have now, I would switch in a heartbeat. Why? Because it would make less pollution and conserve gasoline for some other more important job (like farming, for instance). This isn’t about being a tree hugger or some kind of environmental wacko. If I can have my fun without making messes for other people to clean up, I think that’s better. As the Boy Scouts of America say, “Leave each place better than you found it.” I think that’s a lesson we should all try to follow.
No one would ever call me a bleeding heart, but I think it’s good to feel and show compassion for other people. I’m talking beyond family and friends. That’s important, sure, but just being good to the people closest to you won’t always help the big picture. Think about how much energy, fuel, food, and water are consumed each day by the industrialized countries of the world. Now take a second to remember that there are millions of people, mostly kids, dying each day in places like sub-Saharan Africa, Southeast Asia, and rural India because they don’t have enough food, clean water, or medicine. Does that seem right to you? I think it’s kind of fucked up. It’s like we’re having a big, fat picnic while surrounded by a crowd of starving people who are dying and being forced to watch us eat.
Most of us tune out those stories on the news, and we don’t think about them while we’re chowing down at our backyard barbecues—but maybe we should. Remember what I said about being responsible in how you have fun? This is part of what I’m talking about. I want to live in a world in which everyone everywhere can enjoy their lives to the fullest. To make that happen, we’d have to get serious about changing our priorities, not just as a nation but as a species. Human beings would have to stop fighting over bullshit and get on the same page.
I know, it’s a crazy idea, but if enough of us get behind it, it can work. We each need to start by improving our own lives, and then we need to work on improving the lives of the people closest to us—our friends and families. Next, instead of just complaining about the problems in your neighborhood, town, or city, start pitching in and creating solutions. Become a force for positive change. Make other people’s lives better, not just your own. The more good that you do, the more people who will want to join you and be part of what you’re doing. It’s the snowball effect on a grand scale: the only way to change the world is to start small, one life at a time, and keep pushing forward until the momentum for change becomes unstoppable.
We can build a better world for everyone. All it takes is the willingness to do the work.
This isn’t the kind of change that can happen overnight, but if we all started giving a damn about one another, I think we could make a real difference in less time than you’d think. I also think that regardless of our spiritual or religious beliefs, we have a moral duty to try. If you think there is more to our existence than just our time on earth—in other words, if you believe in an afterlife or in reincarnation—then you should make an effort to keep this planet clean and be good to all the people in it because someday you might have to answer for the life you’ve lived and the choices you’ve made. On the other hand, if you believe that this life is all there is, and that there is no life after death, then it’s even more important that you be considerate about how you use this world’s resources and treat your fellow human beings. If this one trip through life is all that any of us will ever know, and there is no “great reward” after death for those who have suffered in life, then we owe it to one another to make this the best time we can for all of us around the world, and for everyone who’s going to come along after we’re gone.
No matter what you believe in, my point is this: we all have to make our journeys together, so let’s make them awesome and fun.
I think that maybe Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure said it best:
“Be excellent to each other—and party on, dudes!”
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I want to offer my many thanks to the following people without whom this book would never have happened.
Dick McLane, who took a punk military kid and opened his eyes to a world of new possibilities and who always has my back.
Deidre Knight and David Mack for using their collective talents; without their help and support this book would never have been completed.
Scott Meuser for giving me opportunity and support and having the faith in me to get the job done.
All the cool people I’ve met in Pennsylvania for their support and friendship.
Paul Jenkins for encouraging me to write this book and convincing me it was possible.
The staff at Walter Reed for giving me the support and tools for getting my life back. And a special shout-out to nurse “Special K” in the ICU unit of Walter Reed.
My close friend Sunshine, who was my roommate when I first returned from Walter Reed, for his support, companionship, understanding, and being there through “thick and thin.”
Timmy McIlrath and Rise Against for their musical talents and creativity, which allowed me to make that first, important step in getting my life back.
Michael Wait for putting the damn tourniquets on right and saving my life. Michael, thank you.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Bryan Anderson resides in the Chicago area nearby his parents, Jim and Janet, identical twin brother, Bob, and younger sister, Briana. In addition to academic excellence, Bryan excelled in sports during his high school yea
rs and competed as an accomplished gymnast in state-level competitions. Following graduation, he worked for American Airlines as a ground-crew chief at O’Hare Airport.
Bryan enlisted in the Army in April 2001 and had a “ship out” date of September 11, 2001. He served two tours of duty in Iraq and was stationed in the Baghdad area. He attained the rank of sergeant in the military police, conducted police training courses in Iraq, and gained additional law enforcement experience at Leavenworth Federal Penitentiary as a prison guard.
In October 2005, Bryan was injured by an improvised explosive device (IED) that resulted in the loss of both his legs and his left hand. As a result of his injuries, he was awarded a Purple Heart. Bryan received rehabilitation for a period of thirteen months at Walter Reed Army Hospital. He is one of the few triple amputees to have survived his injuries in Iraq.
Bryan’s story has received extensive media coverage, including two feature articles in Esquire magazine (one a cover shot in January 2007) as well as numerous articles in major newspapers and publications, from his hometown paper, the Chicago Sun-Times, to the Los Angeles Times and the New York Times.
Bryan has appeared in the HBO documentary Alive Day Memories: Home from Iraq and in a CSI: NY episode titled “DOA for a Day.” He also appears in the 2008 Golden Globe Award–winning film The Wrestler , starring Mickey Rourke and Marisa Tomei. In addition, Bryan was interviewed by MTV News’s Choose or Lose “Street Team” and has appeared on the daytime drama All My Children.
Bryan is the national spokesman for Quantum Rehab, a division of Pride Mobility Corp., and travels the country making numerous personal appearances in major rehab facilities while delivering his message of perseverance and determination. In addition, he is a spokesman for USA Cares, a nonprofit organization based in Radcliff, Kentucky, that is focused on assisting post-9/11 veterans in times of need.
Bryan is an energetic and enthusiastic individual who enjoys challenging his limits. He snowboards, wakeboards, white-water rafts, and rock climbs. He loves to travel and enjoys meeting new people.
His official website is www.andersonactive.com/.
ABOUT THE COAUTHOR
David Mack is the national best-selling author of nearly twenty novels, including Wildfire, Harbinger, Reap the Whirlwind, Precipice, Road of Bones, Promises Broken, and the Star Trek Destiny trilogy: Gods of Night, Mere Mortals, and Lost Souls. He developed the Star Trek Vanguard series concept with editor Marco Palmieri. His first work of original fiction is the critically acclaimed supernatural thriller The Calling.
In addition to novels, Mack’s writing credits span several media, including television (for episodes of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine), film, short fiction, magazines, newspapers, comic books, computer games, radio, and the Internet.
His upcoming novels include the Star Trek: Mirror Universe adventure Rise Like Lions and a new original supernatural thriller.
Visit his official website, http://www.davidmack.pro, and follow him on Twitter @DavidAlanMack.
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