“Why does he look so different? He’s … older?”
“Only the body ages, not the soul. Evan’s mind is what depicts his appearance. We are not our bodies. If I lost both my arms and legs in an accident my spirit will replace them when I leave my human body. Also the same if I was in an accident that left me scarred, if that’s how I see myself than my spirit will carry on the image. You don’t actually look like that, it just how your mind thinks you look. It’s very tricky to change your appearance; it’s more than just closing your eyes and adjusting your features it takes a lot of willpower to change. The body of a teenager is how he sees himself and that’s how his spirit morphs its shape. In truth we are all actually just weightless blue gas, like the Polveri that you collect on earth. We are just advanced spirits with the capability to change our outline.”
“No kidding…” I glanced down at my hands for closer inspection to try and find something faulty about my projection of them. The only thing I did notice was they were too perfect. The Blue Spirit coaxed her head.
“Time to decide…”
The teens surrounding him scattered as I approached. How would you introduce yourself to a family member who has forgotten you? Do you tiptoe around the truth hoping he’ll work it out on his own? Or do you blurt everything out in the one breath hoping that the connections would snap together? Yet as I approached him and took my breath the words failed to form. Evan tilted his eyes up to catch my gaze. Without a word he just stood there watching me.
I kept my face calm as he dropped his hands to his side, anticipating my next move. Hello Evan. It’s simple just two little words. Hello Evan…. Hello Evan… Hello… Hello...
“Are you the wolf Reaper?” Evan’s crisp voice startled me. He called me the wolf Reaper and not Jordon. What if he doesn’t know who I am? What if he doesn’t remember? What if he does remember and he hates me? I gulped and felt my shoulders drop. Maybe it was just selfish that I wanted him to remember me and I was just trying to appease my own guilt. Maybe to him it was just a life time ago and he no longer cared.
“I just wanted to thank you.” His dimpled smile relaxed his entire face, curving his eyes into gentle half-moons, “I know it’s not much to offer in comparison but I really mean it from the bottom of my heart. Thank you Reaper.”
He turned on his heel as I felt my voice cry out, “Why not stay here? It’s safer for you. Why go back?”
Evan lingered for a moment with his brows pinched together, “W-What did you just say?”
“I said you don’t have to return-”
“I know that voice.” My eyes dilated as Evan turned back towards me, leaning forward to get a clearer look at my face. “It can’t be…” He mumbled with his hand outstretching to touch my cheek.
I turned away instinctively, “It’s probably better that you didn’t.” Ignoring my advice Evan brushed the tip of his fingers against my cheek and lingered his hand in the air. When usually I would feel the mask shift and drop, pressing my real face to the surface nothing changed. I looked back at him alarmed when he snatched at my shoulder and dragged me into a hug.
“It’s you? It was you along!?” He was talking into my shoulder as I felt my arms curl around him and hug him back just as firmly. I had thought about this moment but I never thought it would be like this. I was consumed by numbness; held by silence and left blinking slowly over his right shoulder. Second by second a ribbon of tension was unravelling from my chest and sinking into my toes. My balance wavered as I felt Evan cling to me, his head now resting near my jaw line. It was the best I could’ve hope for but still I couldn’t manage to let my breath go.
“It’s okay now Evan…” My eyes fluttered themselves to a close. I was feeling so dizzy; the outpour of my nerves bombarding my chest and head was enough to tip me over. Lucky my grip on Evan kept me upright.
“I really missed you.” His whispered as he shifted out of the hug and stood upright. Despite my best efforts I couldn’t collect enough thoughts to string more than four words together.
“I’m sorry.” I managed when I un-expectantly found myself bursting out with laughter. Evan was quick to crack into hysterics as well, the astonishment and pleasant disbelief enough to bubble laughter into our chests.
“Why are you laughing?” He barely managed to spit out between his own struggles for breaths.
“Honestly… I don’t know.” I dragged him back into my chest, this time apply a bit more pressure around his head. He squirmed under my head lock playfully. “I’m just happy so happy.”
When I finally released him Evan’s face quickly went serious, as if a thought had just popped into his head, “Why did you disappear? What happened to you?”
The question I had dreaded was finally out in the open. I could try and lay the blame of the other spirits, on Luke for the murder, on the Reapers for forcing me to keep secrets and the Hunters for taking my identity away but I had plenty of chances to bid my goodbyes but like a coward I just hid.
“That night when you found me in the front yard I was meant to be dead. By some terrible miracle I was brought back to life and was able to walk home but when I found out the truth about what I was,” I glanced down at myself, “that I wasn’t me anymore but this Reaper spirit. I think fear took control. I couldn’t stay, I was an omen on the family and I thought my presence in the house would bring more Reapers, Hunters and Goons to the rest of you. I’m sorry I left without saying anything, but how could I explain all this without winding up in some Looney bin?”
Evan nodded his head before wiping a tear away with his finger. I continued speaking feeling my own face become taut with seriousness, “What about you? Who locked you in the attic? Was it Nathan? Mum? Dad?”
“No, no. It was me, I did.”
I tilted my head confused. “What? You locked yourself up? But why?”
“I don’t know… I was stupid and angry. When no one turned up to my performance again I just kind of had enough. I locked myself in and slid the key under the door like I was trying to prove something. I don’t know why they never came looking for me…Maybe they just didn’t care.”
I chewed on my lower lip, “There was some really messed up communications with our family but I promise you they would’ve come looking.”
“Wait-” Evan stepped back, “How did you know I was in the attic?”
“Because I found you the day that you umm… that you died. I was too late. I’m so sorry, I could’ve saved you if I was just that bit faster-” The memory of his head cracking against the floorboard had flooded my mouth with remorse and regret. I could remember it so vividly that I felt myself tense.
Tenderly Evan shrugged his shoulders and sighed. “Maybe if you had saved me then none of this,” he motioned to the realm surrounding us with open arms, “Would ever have happened. You did save me, you saved me now and you saved countless of other spirits too. Maybe I was meant to die so we could do this together. Side by side… like we’re real brothers.”
I laughed casually, “That’s noble of you but you don’t have to worry anymore. Stay here and be safe.”
“And let you have all the fun and glory? I don’t think so!” Evan scoffed.
“She’ll be fine…” I reassured just as Evan’s ears pinched red in embarrassment. He didn’t even try to deny it, the truth spilled all over his face in a pink blush.
“Oh… so you know huh?” He mumbled into his chest, “It’s not that. What if I can’t let her go? I can’t stay for an eternity here if it meant leaving her behind.” I felt my eyebrows narrow. I hadn’t realised it, heck, I didn’t think that it was possible but had Evan had fallen in love with his Host? I had thought Banished were incapable of love.
“Oh?” I couldn’t help myself but grin widely at the thought of it. My baby brother had found love for the first time. Under any other circumstance I would’ve teased him about it but there was something heavier weighing on my mind “Is there even a chance though? I mean… she’s still alive.”
Evan gr
inned broadly, “That’s the thing about life it doesn’t last forever.” His boisterous smile fell for a second, “I took it once… when it wasn’t mine to take.”
“Was she in trouble?” I asked glumly.
“It was because of me. She deserved much more than anything I could give her. In the end I’m just a boy, a ghost. Whatever happiness she deserved wasn’t going to be found with me. Giving back her life was all I could do to try and correct the horrible things I’ve done. Not only to her but to her dad as well.”
“That’s really courageous of you.” In a lighter tone I added, “Kind of weird though, I mean...she is your cousin.”
Playfully Evan threw his fist into my arm, “Not my cousin, your cousin. Joke all you want but I know this is real and that this wasn’t just something extra that a Host Binding may have caused. I don’t care how long it takes I know she’ll come back to me and by then I’ll be worthy of her.”
My thoughts instantly moved onto Betrayal and I felt the same pinch of heart break hit my chest again, almost like I was reliving that moment when she was tossed into the flames. I shook my head loose not allowing my thoughts to darken my mood. I hadn’t had the chance to mourn for her properly but now wasn’t the time.
“Okay Romeo,” I teased, “You’re as stubborn as ever. Guess the best way for me to an eye on you is to keep you by my side.”
Evan bit into his grin and I felt my face stretch in my smile. “I’ll admit I never expected death to be like this. To be twisted and strange.”
“You think this is twisted, wait till you meet Raix.”
“Boyfriend of yours?” Evan cocked an eyebrow and I scrunched my face up at him.
“It’s called a Goon you jerk. And you won’t be laughing at him once he’s grown up.” The Blue Spirit cleared her throat before motioning towards the time, indicating for us to hurry up.
“Do you know what’s going to happen next?” Evan asked.
I shook my head, loosening a sigh, “Nope. Never do. Keeps things interesting. If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s making enemies and making life difficult.”
Chapter Thirty-One:
Gargoyle’s Chapter
I glanced back at my wristwatch. The second hand ticked along the perimeter in perfect rotation with the spiralling cogs, marking the time at exactly midnight. I glanced back up and let my breath go. Was this a punishment? I started to believe their gossip. That night played again and again through my mind, every time I tweaked it a little trying to foreseen any different outcomes. I had Rachael in my grasp. I remembered how her hands felt small and cold, fingers smoothed as their pressed into my palm. To quieten her struggles I had to keep strict eye contact, burrowing my thoughts so deeply inside her mind that I almost lost touch with myself.
There was always a risk of that, of tipping over so far into the mind of others that my grip on myself can loosen and drop me. Where I would land is hard to say. I may nest inside their head, able to return forcibly or I may shatter once hitting the concentrate leaving my body behind as a mindless cacoon. She was so scared and struggled with such determination that I almost felt obliged to let her go. What’s just one Spirit out of thousands?
But I knew I couldn’t do that, she HAD to be destroyed. Her especially. It was the only way to draw out Lock from his new Host; it was obvious he couldn’t stand being away for even two minutes. The protection string that was his noose was the perfect way to regain my honour. With Lock destroyed then perhaps the Reaper would drop his rebellion out of depression. He wanted to save him so badly. Perhaps I was also curious to see how far I could push him until he broke.
My only mistake was letting my concentration slip, even for a split second allowing Rachael enough time to scramble backwards out of the water. Then when Mother appeared everything unravelled. How was I supposed to foresee that attack? What was I meant to do against a pure spirit when I was fighting alone? For the fifth time that hour I felt myself sigh heavily again. Things aren’t going the way I had planned them. No matter how hard I try to impress Miira, how much I go beyond the requirements there is always something she picks out that makes my efforts feel dull. Even with the encouragement from Chaos and Damage I could feel myself slipping under the pressure of trying to please her. And now she had me running after some sort of druggy, tsk. I shifted on the park bench and felt my head tilt back. The overbearing light felt like itchy heat against my skin. It must be nearly time? The night had felt peacefully calm amongst the chaos of their festival.
The barbaric noise was just across the street from where I sat. The chill in the air was dozed underneath the upwards heat that rose with the smoke. In the middle of the blaze was a vague form of a stick man, dressed in clothes and stacked taller than the trees. Against the night’s sky the orange pyramid was impossible to miss, even the smoke flickered with amber coloured debris. Alas I was not to here to enjoy the lights or pretend to fit in with their drunken dancing and stumbling feet. Tonight I was here to murder someone.
I pushed myself up, adjusted my collar and brushed my hand through my hair. Around the fire like a tribal dance the rebels were jumping and hooting. In one hand was a bottle of beer and in the other hand were either lighters, cigarettes or more beer. Music of distorted thumping and heavy vibrations moved the dirt underneath my feet; even within five minutes I could feel it pulsating against my ear drums. To even talk to one another they had to lean so close that their lips touch the skin and shout directly into each other’s ear lobe.
The thought of them invading my personal space had my muscles tense. I didn’t appreciate their hooked eyes following me as I walked into the light that coated my skin in an orange glow. I understood that Hunters stood out, if not by the attention seeking red hair than it was our perfectly aligned faces. We had to look perfect in order to appear perfect, or some may even describe as angelic. As the Reapers wore masks we also had face altering abilities. It’s rather sickening how their eyes softened and their jaws went slack, whatever hormones that controlled their bodies now going into overdrive. It was so primitive and vulgar. It’s impossible to believe that I was a part of their idiocy race.
Unable to withstand another moment of their drunken gawking I pulled the black hood over my head and stalked further into the pack. He was easy to find, standing next to the beer keg and pumping the tap into a red plastic cup. Once he stood I watched him tipped backwards, throwing the drink down his throat in one gulp before crushing the cup in his fist. He had stumbled into a bulky male, trotting on the boy with a nose piercing’s heels where he turned and shoved him off. Within two minutes a brawl broke out and within ten seconds it quickly ended with my target punching the air and throwing himself into the dirt.
He stayed sprawled and groaning, unable to understand what had hit him when landing his forehead against the ground. I felt myself instinctively roll my eyes. Primate!
Before the victor could land another hit I step up from behind him and easily redirected his punch with a simple turn. He spun back to face me furious. Back away, I commanded once locking eyes with him; he then dropped his raised clenched fist and merely returned to his drinking. I turned back to the young man left in the dirt, watching as he struggled to lift himself up.
“Get up; I’m here to collect you Nathan.” I spoke as he peeked up from his clenched eyes.
“Wh-What? Who are you? How do you know me?” The smell of alcohol that wafted from his breath was more toxic than the actual drink. I crinkled my nose.
“I’m your guardian angel.” I had said sarcastically.
“Guardian angel? That’s priceless.” He mocked with a snort. Nathan brushed two hands down his darken top, trying to clear the stains from his clothes. His reddish hair had grown long and untamed with a dirty five o’clock beard shadowing along his jawline. Despite his faults I could see a great deal of Jordon in him, especially in his similar facial features and haunted eyes. How did one brother become the ruler of a rebellion and the other sink into the pits of drugs and
alcohol? Unless Miira was counting on the determination to run in the bloodline I really don’t see why we would seek this brother out.
I couldn’t help myself but preach, the way their minds worked were so baffling to me, “Count your blessings I am here to deliver you to a greater calling. Is partying, drugs and alcohol helping you?”
With misplaced pride Nathan started to laugh before wiping his mouth along his forearm. “Are you here to deliver me from this hellhole?”
“You’ve done this to yourself but I can save you from a far worse punishment…”
“Bull! If you were my guardian angel then where are your wings hmm? Your little halo hat? Why aren’t you dressed in white? For a con artist you really don’t know what you’re doing.” Nathan motioned to my attire with flimsy hand gestures.
“I’m not a con artist.”
“That’s exactly what a con artist would say. Listen here jerk, my life is perfect. I’m a grown man; I live my life how I want to live. No parents, no rules just freedom.”
“And a mouth full of vomit and bare pockets” I sneered and he merely threw his hands up as if I had understood his point.
“Exactly, now if you’ll excuse me, my buffet awaits” Unable to walk properly he just ended up stumbling into some bushes before crashing to his knees. I don’t know how much alcohol was pumping through his veins but it was enough to keep him grounded.
“Let’s hope that Miira knows what she is doing.” I sighed as I stepped over the top of him.
“Get off me man! What are you doing?” He slurred and put his arms up to bat me away.
It was so pathetic; almost like putting an old, blind stupid dog to rest. “Let’s just say for you it’s judgement day.”
I brought my hand down on top of his heart, curling my fingers into his clothes so I could easily grip his chest. As he convulsed I made sure to keep my grip on him firm, hollowing out the energy from his body like sucking through a straw. White foam start to froth from his mouth before his entire body started to convulse. The seizure didn’t take very long before his eyes rolled into the back of his head and his skin flushed white with purple veins pressed to the surface. Once he went still I stepped backwards and watched the blue smog of his spirit lift upwards.
My Demonic Ghost Book two (The Reapers 2) Page 28
