by Skyla Madi
See you very soon.
I frowned. Whoever it was, they were delusional. Who in their right mind would go to their killer? My body relaxed as I thought this could all be a sick practical joke, perhaps it was Raina? Regardless, until I found out if it was or not, I couldn’t let my guard down. I took the note and stuffed into the top draw of my desk—out of sight, out of mind—or so they say.
***
This morning was very eventful. I argued with Eli, visited Mila, got coffee, and punched Raina, not to mention all the other stuff in between. I grabbed my pillow and threw myself onto the bed. As soon as I got into a comfortable enough position, I fell asleep.
I felt like I napped only a few minutes when knocks sounded upon my door. I glanced at my clock as it beeped, alerting me that it was dinner time. I slept for five hours! I raced over to the door, not bothering to straighten my hair.
“Ruby, its dinner time,” Eli called through the door. He still sounded pissed off.
I pulled it open.
“Why aren’t you dressed?” he asked, the anger no longer evident in his tone. “Have you been asleep this whole time?”
“Give me ten minutes,” I said, closing the door and rushing over to my wardrobe. I pulled out a knee length, flowy, Athena styled dress and raced to the bathroom. I ripped off my clothes and slid into the dress. I brushed my hair down, regretting I didn’t brush it this morning as my brush ripped massive knots from my hair. I applied a base foundation and some light mascara, and then I was done. I slipped into a pair of black flats and opened the door again. Eli’s eyes slowly drank in my dress. He didn’t say anything and he didn’t have to. His loss of breath and long gaze said it all. I looked good.
He cleared his throat. “We’re late for dinner,”
I angled my head and smiled at him. “Lead the way.”
His eyes lingered on mine for a little while longer before he turned and headed down the hallway. I closed my door behind me and remembered to lock it this time. I wasn’t in the mood for any after dinner scares.
When Eli and I stepped out of the dorms, I tilted my head towards the night sky, smiling softly as little spits of raindrops kiss my cheeks. I’d always found some small, strange comfort in rain. Hopefully, it comes down hard and fast when it’s time to sleep. I sighed and dropped my head, returning my attention to my shoes as I continued to stroll idly beside Eli.
I looked up at him and his green eyes flicked curiously to my face. “I’m not dangerous. I don’t need to be escorted.”
He almost smiled. Almost. “You are dangerous and you do need to be escorted.”
“I guess I did attack another student, but still that didn’t mean I will attack other students.”
“You’re unpredictable. Who knows what you’d do.”
I rolled my eyes as we made it to the hall. When I entered, some people clapped, some people gasped, and some even stared at me in fear.
Eli grabbed my arm and tugged me over to an isolated table by the corner of the room. Apparently, at my level of detention, I wasn’t allowed to sit with friends or near other students. Shortly after, burgers on Turkish buns were placed in front of us. Not feeling very hungry, I let my eyes scan over the room while Eli ate happily in the silence. A bright pink dress by the door caught my attention and I groaned.
“Ugh, just my luck,”
Raina walk through the door and her eyes focused directly onto mine. I cringed at her face. No matter how much concealer, foundation, and eye shadow she used, her bruise stood out like a sore thumb. She started to storm over, no doubt trying to gain her dignity back and there was a slight smirk on her lips that irked me. She knew as long as Eli was here I couldn’t touch her.
Eli shot out of his chair before she got within five feet of our table. “Raina,” He warned her, his voice chillingly cold.
“How dare you!” she boomed, peering furiously around Eli’s side. A few people close by heard her and stopped to watch.
“You’re insane! You’re a psychopath!”
“Brilliance is impossible without a touch of insanity.” I smiled.
Raina growled, stomping her foot in frustration.
Eli raised his hand and flicked his finger, signalling Sera over. She walked over casually but quickly, trying not to draw any more attention. Her long fingers wrapped around Raina’s shoulder and she nudged her slowly to the far end of the room.
“This isn’t over.” She snarled at me.
The same snap I felt earlier when I hit her returned. It turned out, I didn’t respond well to threats. I leaped from my chair and threw myself against Eli as he whipped in front of me, preventing me from getting closer to Raina.
“What are you going to do?” I yelled. “What could you possibly do to hurt me?”
The majority of the room was staring at us now, including the teachers. I ignored the student body as a few of the students encouraged a fight.
Raina’s eyes widen slightly, making it clear she didn't want to get into another fist fight with me. We both knew who’d come out on top in that one. Knowing Raina and her vindictive personality, she was going to try and dig up some more dirt on me. She played mentally not physically and it was safe to say I was Raina’s new worst enemy, not Mila. Bad choice on her part though, I clearly wasn’t afraid to throw the first punch or the last. She turned and thundered to the other side of the room.
When Eli was sure she was at a safe distance, he sat back down in his chair.
“Sit,” He demanded, pointing at my chair.
Afraid to piss him off, I did as I was told.
“You need to control your temper,” he stated, taking a bite out of his burger.
I rolled my eyes. Not this conversation again.
“Me? She provoked me,”
He swallowed. “Ignore her.”
I picked a stray piece of lettuce off my plate and picked at it. “I try to, but she keeps pushing.”
“Let me teach you.”
“To ignore people?” I laughed once. “That’s useless. You want to be helpful? Then teach me how to fight.”
“Judging by the size of her black eye, you already know how to fight.”
I shrugged, sticking the lettuce in m mouth. “Punching a skank is easy. I need to learn how to take down vampires or at least a student angel.”
Eli flickered an expression of disapproval when I swore, but he didn’t bother pulling me up on it.
“Not going to happen. That’s why you have me, and student guardian angels are still deadly.”
I pouted. “You get all the fun.”
Eli flashed a sexy smile and it drew my attention to his lips, making me ponder the thought of tasting them again. Most of the time I was unsure about how Eli felt about me. Sure, we kissed and it was passionate and unforgettable, but since then he has hardly given any indication of how he felt about me. This morning, on the way to Aleksandrov’s house, we connected, but I wanted more. I wanted to be on a physical level with him.
I cared for Eli, a lot more than I should, but I wasn’t sure whether it was lust or if my feelings went beyond his godly good looks. We continued to eat dinner in silence and every now and then I’d look up at him. He was always thinking, always off in some little world of his own. Eli texted someone a few times and the sight of his phone brought my mind back to the underground cell I was held in when I first got here. Camilla’s words were so alive and real in mind as I thought about her. She’d been so sad and frustrated with me. I wanted to call her again but I was afraid she’d never want to talk to me again.
“Rubes!”
I snapped my head up to see Rylan walking over to us. Eli shifted in his seat, watching Rylan cautiously.
“Wow!” He exclaimed, leaning the palms of his hands on the table. “Did you see the damage you did?”
“Yeah…” I replied, feeling embarrassed. “Look, I’m not really allowed to socialize. I’m a criminal right now.”
“Oh okay,” He straightened himself, taking his palms o
f the table and glancing briefly at Eli. “Well I’ll see you—”
“Actually, Rylan, sit.” Eli interrupted. “Keep her company while I run a quick errand,”
He got up from his chair without a glance in my direction and walked out the door. I stared after him as Rylan dropped into Eli’s seat, pushing his plate out of the way.
“You can throw a mean punch! Half the school is buzzing with gossip.”
“What’s new…” I mumbled, but Rylan didn’t seem to hear me.
“I didn’t come over here to talk about that, I actually came over here to tell you that every year we hold a dance and it’s coming up in three months. Would you like to go together?”
I almost choked on the piece of lettuce I was nibbling on. Wow, this was awkward. Rylan was cute and wore cologne you could get lost in, but I didn’t want to be his date, for anything, at any stage in my life.
I wanted a guy who made my stomach flutter, who was polite and respectful to everyone because he didn’t think of anybody as beneath him, a man who did good things not because of what he’d gain but simply because it was the right thing to do. I wanted someone that cared about the injustices of the world and tried to help even if the issue didn’t affect his life. I wanted a man like…like Eli. I’d answered my own question, the feelings I felt for Eli went deeper than his appearance, he’d been my rock, my support beam throughout everything that has happened to me these past few days and he didn’t have to be.
Unnerved by my silence, Rylan said, “This is honestly not what I was expecting,”
I pushed my plate out of the way. “Rylan, I’m sorry, but I…”
“You’re going with Hunter,” he replied, bluntly.
“No. I’m not going with anyone. I didn’t even know there was going to be a dance.”
“Then just come with me.”
I folded my arms. “No, I’m sorry.”
“I thought you liked me.”
“I do, as a friend, but I—“
“—that day in class, you…I thought you were into me,” He interrupted, hanging his head in his hands.
I stared at him, blinking quickly.
“Never mind.” Rylan pushed his chair back and stormed out the door.
I thought back to the day I met Rylan in class, had I really flirted with him?
“Men,” scoffed Hunter, walking up to me.
I dropped my head into my hands, shaking it softly. “Why me, God, why me?”
He chuckled. “C’mon, now, I’m not that bad.”
I looked at him and the truth was, no, he wasn’t. Hunter leaned over the back of Eli’s chair. Today’s attire was baggy jeans and hooded jumper—attractive, but still no Eli. I sighed and picked at the Turkish bread on my plate.
“Don’t worry,” Hunter grinned. “I would have chosen me over Rylan as well.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “I didn’t choose anybody.”
His grin widened, his eyes flashing with great amusement. “Yet.”
“I’m not going to the stupid dance.”
“You have to, it’s mandatory.”
I groaned. “Then I’ll go alone.”
He arched an eyebrow at me just as Eli came back through the door. His eyes narrowed slightly when he saw Hunter and then he turned them on me.
“Time to go,” Eli said, the annoyance clear in his voice.
Annoyance, or jealousy... I couldn’t really tell. Hunter drew himself to full height, smiling innocently at Eli. “You relax, Mr De Luca, finish your meal. I’m a senior. I can escort students back to the safety of their dorm.”
“Not this time,” Eli replied.
Hunter’s smile faltered and I fought the urge to poke my tongue out at him as I rose from my seat. Eli’s hand fell to the small of my back as he escorted me around Hunter and toward the door. When I was a short distance away from Hunter, Eli’s hand dropped from my back.
“Ruby,” Hunter called and I looked over my shoulder.
Hunter quickly raked his fingers through his unkempt, black hair. “You look beautiful, as always.”
Warmth spread up my neck and pooled in my cheeks as I gave him an awkward smile. I was slightly embarrassed he’d randomly say something like that and in front of Eli no less. When I brought my attention back to the front, I noticed Eli walking at a fast, frustrated pace.
“You’re walking too fast,” I complained, pulling my dress up so I didn’t trip on it trying to catch up with him.
“You want to fight vampires yet you’re complaining about me walking too fast? Great start.”
I frowned and reached out to touch his arm. “What’s wrong?”
He didn't answer, but managed to increase his speed. I wasn’t going to play this game, so I stopped and sat on a wooden bench.
Eli groaned and turned around. He glared down his nose at me and I felt my eyes crinkle as I stared up at him, confused.
“Come on, Ruby.” He ordered.
I didn’t budge.
He blew a breath of air out of his mouth and hung his head. Firmly and slowly, he ran a hand over his face and stepped toward me. He dropped his hand and sat down next to me. His face was barely illumined by the murky light post above us. We were alone. There were no students walking around.
“I’m sorry, I just…” he stopped and took another deep breath.
“You just what?”
Eli sat in thought for a while and I didn’t disturb him, not when I was so close to finally getting him to open up.
“I’m frustrated. I hear what the boys at this school say about you and I just don’t want you to be taken advantage of…And Hunter he’s...” He shook his head. “I mean, I understand their teenage boys and all, but—”
“I’m not interested in any of them.” I interrupted, turning my body towards his. Our knees touched, but he didn’t pull away. “I don’t even know why they’re interested in me. I was a vampire, for crying out loud.”
He leaned forward on his knees, looking back over his shoulder at me. His eyes raked over me before a smile twitched at the corner of his lips.
“You have this energy that makes you hard to ignore.” He dropped his eyes to look at the concrete. “Goddesses aren’t usually so…like you. You have this humour and charm about you...you’re special, you’re amusing, you’re attractive, and an accomplishment in their eyes.”
Eli looked down and I could tell he’d come to the same conclusion I had earlier. We cared for each other, deeply. Our feelings ran deeper than our appearances and as long as Eli was a guardian angel and I was a goddess, we could never be together.
“You really think all that about me?” I muttered, entwining my fingers.
He laughed once under his breath. “Does it matter?”
“To me it does.”
He pushed off the bench, all signs of his vulnerability gone. “Well, it shouldn’t. Nothing can ever become of us. You should be dating boys your own age and kind.”
I stood up. “But I don’t want them, I want you.”
He grabbed at me, taking my wrist in his hand. “C’mon, we have to get you to your dorm.”
I snatched my hand back. “No. Listen to me.”
He glanced around nervously before reluctantly locking eyes with me. I kept my voice as quiet but as stern as I could. “You can’t say the things you do and expect me to not feel anything for you. You know how I feel about you—you can feel it, but I can’t feel how you feel about me and it kills me. You say and do these things that make me think you feel the same way, and then you close off and pretend it never happened. I hate it.”
He pondered for a moment before speaking. His green eyes darkened, becoming enraged.
“I’m sorry if you feel like I led you on, but I feel nothing towards you.”
The rough, coolness in his tone made me flinch.
“Am I attracted to you? Yes. Do I want to do things to you? Yes, but you are a student and a goddess, both of which are not okay. I like you, Ruby, I do, but not in the way that you
want me to.”
Pressure grew in my chest as a lump formed in my throat. I bit my tongue against an onslaught of tears that threatened to spill. The lines in Eli’s face deepened as a look of pain settled over his features. He felt my heart break, but not as much as I did.
“Ruby—”
I rapidly raised my palm to him, cutting him off. “You’ve said enough.”
I forced a fake smile and I pushed past him, continuing the walk to my dorm room. I heard the heavy tap of Eli’s boots as he followed closely behind me. I wished he’d let me walk the rest of the way by myself.
Every step I took brought me closer and closer to my room. I swiped at a tear that dropped down my cheek. I felt stupid for being upset, I knew he was lying. I knew he cared about me in more ways than physically...and sexually. The thought of Eli wanting me like that was thrilling, but it wasn’t all I wanted. Sex wasn’t something I’d ever commit to for fun, but for feelings—strong feelings, like love—or something fairly close to that.
***
My thoughts brought me all the way to my dorm room and my shoulders sagged in relief as I approached my door.
“Ruby…”
I turned abruptly, but I couldn’t look him in the eyes. If I did, I’d certainly lose my composure.
“What I said was harsh, but you have to understand where I’m coming—”
“I understand,” I interrupted, flicking my eyes to his. “I’m pretty beat so I’m going to bed... if you don’t mind.”
He nodded, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Okay, well, Goodnight then… I’ll see you in the auditorium tomorrow after classes."
I didn’t say goodnight, knowing very well that if I opened my mouth anymore I would’ve choked up. I stepped into my room closed the door. I didn't realize I was holding my breath as I looked at my pillow.
No note.
I blew air out of my cheeks and slumped into myself.
Screw today. Screw today, hard.
***
I woke up feeling like I’d slept for days, I felt alive and rested. It was eight—breakfast time—which I promptly decided to skip in fear of seeing Eli. I knew he’d probably come for me, but it was a risk I was going to take. Hopefully, he remembered the conversation we had last night and decide to let it slip.
