“What do you think of this, Loku?”
“You’re the one with an extra soul residing in your body.”
Arden inched closer to the Ornathian, keeping Dev in front of her. Sazi’s description of souls whetted her curiosity. Perhaps she would be a good teacher when it came to containing Loku and understanding his motives. “How would I be able to see inside your soul?”
“Come closer and I will show you.”
Arden moved past Dev and came within a few feet of her, her shield still raised.
Sazi took her hand and pressed it into the center of her chest. Her skin was warm, despite the coldness of the room and the thin fabric of her dress. Her heart beat slow and steady. “Close your eyes and look inside.”
Arden complied, closing her eyes while Sazi began to chant in an unknown language. Now, her accent became music, the notes wafting from high to low like a kite playing on a breeze. As the song ended, a golden light filled Arden’s vision.
“Do you see the light of my soul?” Sazi asked. “A soul full of malice is dark like the intents of the bearer. A benevolent soul is bright enough to chase away the shadows.”
The light grew brighter, blinding her other senses. Her fear vanished. If this was truly Sazi’s soul, then there was nothing to hide. She opened her eyes to find Sazi smiling at her.
“Are you satisfied, Arden Soulbearer?”
“Yes.” For the first time since she arrived in Gravaria, Arden knew peace. It flowed through her, calming her heart and easing the tension from her weary muscles. Sazi had kept nothing from her, unlike the others. Perhaps she’d be able to learn more than just magic from the Ornathian. “I’m ready to begin my training now.”
“Then I will leave you in the care of Sazi.” Dev bowed to them and left.
Sazi snapped her fingers, and the fireplace roared to life. She grinned. “I have heard you already mastered that spell.”
“Yes. It was one of the first ones Dev taught me.”
“Then we will not waste our time with the basic spells.” She went to the stacks of scroll along the wall and pulled one out. “I think this will be a good place to start your training.”
“Are you going to teach me how to contain Loku?”
“Eager to be rid of me?”
“Eager to learn what I need to so I can return home.”
“And shatter poor little Kell’s heart.”
A moment she’d been dreading. Ever since Dev kissed her, she knew that there was no use in pretending her feelings for Kell would reach the same intensity of those for Dev. She’d only be lying to herself and him. The sooner she let Kell go, the better. But she still didn’t know how she’d explain it to him.
“I will teach you soul magic once you have proven to me you have the capabilities to use it responsibly. Until then, we practice more advanced spells.” She gave the scroll to Arden. “Would you like to learn how to walk through walls?”
That spell had been quite useful when she and Dev were prisoners in Trivinus. She nodded and unrolled the scroll.
***
Arden focused on the knitting needles in front of her. They twitched at first, then rose into the air.
“Very good,” Sazi said next to her. “Now teach them to knit.”
She looped a piece of yarn around one of the needles and refocused her energy from one needle to the next, orchestrating their movements bit by bit.
Sazi laughed. “I take it you are not a very skilled knitter.”
The needles rattled to the table. “What gave that away?”
“You are skipping stitches.” She held up the mess of tangled yarn to show the gaps. “But you demonstrated good control of two different objects. You are improving.”
Arden plopped down in a chair and sighed. She’d spent the last week in Sazi’s tower, practicing spell after spell until she could barely keep her eyes open. More than one night found her leaning on Dev as she stumbled down the stairs to her room, skipping dinner in favor of sleep. But her arsenal of spells grew daily, and that kept her coming back.
A ring of light appeared on the table. When it faded, a tiny folded piece of paper sat in its center. Sazi picked it up and opened it. “Dev wishes for you to stay up here tonight.”
“Did he give a reason why?”
“No.”
Of course not, she thought as she pinched her lips together. Why should he explain his commands? He expected her to follow his orders, no matter what.
Sazi burned the note in her hand, scattering the ashes over her balcony. “You are not happy with his request?”
“I just wish he’d stop hiding things from me.” She rolled one of the knitting needles across the table. “I’d probably fight him less if I knew why he asked me to do things.”
“Perhaps I can provide you with some information.” She beckoned Arden to join her on the balcony.
Arden stepped outside and immediately felt the icy bite of the wind tear through her dress. She rubbed her arms and came as close to the edge as she dared. Several men on horses waited outside the main building of the Conclave. “Who are they?”
“The Lord Chamberlain and a few of his men.” Sazi placed her hands on Arden’s shoulders and pulled her back inside. “We should not let them see you.”
“Why?” Arden warmed her hands in front of the fire. “Is he behind the attacks?”
Sazi let her fingers drift down the stacks of scrolls. “I cannot say, but I sense Dev thinks he may bring you harm.”
“Me?” She laughed to settle her nerves, but it wasn’t easy to forget the way Dev told her to hide that night the Lord Chamberlain came looking for her. “Do you suppose it has anything to do with the Empress?” Or my little attack on her?
“I would be lying if I told you it did not.”
At least Sazi was answering her questions, unlike Dev and his father. She pressed on and asked the one question that had been bugging her since she first saw the Empress. “I couldn’t help but notice that I look a little like the Empress.”
Sazi’s hand stopped. “Yes, you do bare a strong resemblance to her.”
Finally, someone confirmed her suspicions. “I mean, we almost look like we could be sisters, but I know that’s preposterous. After all, I’m a Ranellian, a human, not some Gravarian elf.”
“Half-elf.” Sazi pulled out a scroll. “The Empress is a half-elf. Her father, the Emperor, was human.”
The hairs on back of her neck stood on end. She grabbed her necklace. Dev wanted her to keep it hidden, but why? Because it contained some clue about her father? Because it might link her to the Empress? She pulled it out of her bodice and showed the pendant to Sazi. “Does this mean anything?”
Sazi touched at the side with random scratches. “It belonged to someone named Alisa”
“Alisa was my mother’s name.” Arden tucked her necklace away, wanting to ask more questions but fearing the answers. “My father supposedly gave it to her.” She waited to see if Sazi offered any more information about the man who’d been a complete mystery her entire life.
Sazi cocked her head to the side and pursed her lips. “Do you remember anything about him?”
She shook her head. “He abandoned my mother before I was born.”
“I do not think a man who would give such a gift as this would so quickly abandon her.” Her dark eyes softened.
“He did.” The cold metal stung against her chest, reminding her of the heartache her mother had suffered because of him. She returned to the knitting needles, gripping one like a dagger. If she ever found out who her father was…
Sazi came up behind her. “You have much hatred in your soul for this man you know nothing about. Perhaps your soul is hanging on to this hatred because you cannot remember the truth.”
“I only remember my mother’s tears.”
“Yes, your mind remembers that, but your soul’s memory goes back much further. May I help you tap it?”
Arden’s throat constricted. To gain the truth, she’d hav
e to revisit the pain of her past. Would it be worth it? “How can you access my soul’s memories?”
“With your permission, I can help guide you into the recess of your soul. From there, we can learn what it hides and perhaps free you from your hatred.”
She set the needle down on the table. She trusted Sazi, but could she trust herself? “I’m ready when you are.”
Sazi stood behind her and wrapped her long, dark arms around Arden’s chest. She began chanting, her wings rising to enfold the two of them. The black feathers blocked the light and plunged her into darkness. As the chant continued, her mind drifted off, and the world blurred around her. A pair of steady arms held her up as everything else fell away.
The first thing she heard was her mother’s voice. The sound made her heart ache with longing. She missed her so much. Then, the darkness faded to reveal her mother’s face. Tears gathered in the corners of her mother’s eyes as she said, “She looks so much like her father.”
Something Arden had known for years. How else could she explain her blond hair and blue eyes in a land where brown features dominated the population?
“She’s cursed,” another unfamiliar woman spat. “You’d be better off drowning her.”
Her mother’s arms tightened around her. “No.”
“You’d keep the spawn of a man who cast you aside?” the other woman asked.
Her mother looked down at her, pain flashing across her face. “Yes.”
“Then I wish you good riddance. One look at that child’s ears, and the whole town will want to burn her.”
The door slammed, and her mother broke down in tears.
Arden’s own eyes burned as she watched her mother cry, a familiar memory of her childhood.
After her mother wiped away her last tear, she stood and fetched something from the other end of the room. A look of resolve hardened her face when she returned. “Forgive me, Arden, but I have to do this. They can’t ever know.”
The light flashed off a pair of sharp scissors before a searing pain ripped through the tops of her ears.
Arden screamed, and the world faded to black.
***
Dev paced outside his father’s chambers, hoping the Lord Chamberlain wouldn’t demand to see Arden. He already knew his father wouldn’t allow it. The Mage Primus ruled over the Conclave like a king, and the Lord Chamberlain had little power here. Still, the unexpected arrival of Caz had him on edge. Until he had a chance to speak to Varrik himself, he didn’t want anyone else learning of Arden’s bloodlines.
Out of nowhere, a scream of pain filled his mind, dropping him to his knees. He pressed his hands against his ears, but it did little good. His breath quickened as he placed the source of those screams.
Arden.
Forgetting about Caz de Miloria and his entourage, Dev raced up Sazi’s tower. His heart rose into this throat. The screams had stopped, and the silence left behind awakened the fear that he was too late to save her.
He flung the door open to find Arden on her knees, crying against Sazi’s chest. Relief turned his muscles into clay. She was alive, but pain still laced her sobs. “What happened?”
Sazi looked up, an unspoken question burning in her dark eyes. “It is my fault. I did not expect to find such a painful memory.”
Dev knelt down next to Arden and pulled her into his arms. “What did you see?”
A few seconds passed before she stopped crying long enough to look up. Her red-rimmed eyes pleaded with him for comfort. “My mother…” Her voice drifted off, and her hand came to the scars on her ears.
He hugged her tighter and scowled at Sazi. “Why did you delve into her memories?”
“She wanted to know why you wished to keep her from the Lord Chamberlain.” Sazi lifted her chin and rose to her full height. “You cannot keep secrets from her if you wish to gain her trust.”
A string of curses rolled through his mind. He focused his energy on easing Arden’s tears instead of letting them loose off his tongue. “But there are some things she doesn’t need to know right now.”
Arden shoved him away. “You knew, didn’t you? You knew my father was an elf.”
Dev leaned back on his heels and ran his hand along his face. Confession time had come, and he wasn’t sure how much she already knew. “Yes. I noticed the scars the first morning I spent with you.”
“And you didn’t tell me?”
“Would it have changed anything?”
Her chin quivered. Then she jumped to her feet and ran down the stairs.
By Jussip, he was going to have to lock her away and throw away the key if he ever wanted to have a moment of peace. If she ran into Caz, it would be the perfect culmination to this shitstorm that had been brewing since they got off the ship.
He chased her down the stairs and caught her at the halfway point, pushing her against the wall. “Will you get ahold of yourself before you get into even more trouble?”
“How much more do you know? Do you know who that bastard is?” Her boot connected with his shin, but he held on to her wrists, pinning her to the wall as she thrashed to get free. “Is he one of your elf buddies? Is that why you’ve been hiding him from me?”
“Will you listen to yourself?”
Her attacks grew weaker. “I’m tired of you treating me like a child.”
“Then stop acting like one.”
The fight left her, and her head dropped down. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
He released her wrists and let her body slump against him, his arms wrapped around her. His heart ached for her. He knew the power a memory could have, how it could weigh on the soul until it squeezed out every drop of joy. “Look at how much pain this one memory has caused you. I just wanted to protect you.”
“You can’t protect me from the truth. It will eventually come out. It always does.”
He nodded and stroked her hair. “I was a fool to hope I could keep this knowledge from you forever.”
She looked up at him, her tears dying up. “Why would you even try?”
“Because I’m your Protector, Arden.” He ran his finger along her wet cheek to the place where her tears pooled along her jaw, wiping them away. “I would slay all your demons for you if you’d let me, just so you’d never have to cry again.”
She laced her fingers through his, her eyes softening. “You would?”
He nodded. “Until I draw my last breath.”
A hesitant smile drew up her lips. She leaned her head toward him.
His pulse quickened. If she kissed him, he didn’t know if he could stop himself from kissing her back.
“Is everything alright?” Sazi called from above.
They jerked away from each other, both of them breathing heavier than normal. He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. It was getting harder and harder to hide his feelings from her, to deny her touch. And if she continued to look at him that way, he wouldn’t be able to resist her any longer.
“We’re fine,” Arden called back.
But when she stared at him, he felt like his whole world was unraveling. He meant what he said about wanting to slay all her demons, and as long as they existed—real or otherwise—he couldn’t let his guard down. And the fact he felt her pain from a distance worried him all the more. It spoke of the growing bond between them, one that could further compromise his duty. How could he keep a clear head when his thoughts constantly revolved around her?
He offered a shaky hand to her. “We’d best go back inside Sazi’s tower before one of the Lord Chamberlain’s men find you.”
“I suppose you’re right.” She took his hand and followed him upstairs, saying along the way, “Thank you, Dev, for wanting to protect me.”
Chapter 22
Kell followed Fane through the nearly deserted streets of Queembra. It was the middle of the afternoon, when the heat was at its peak, and most of the citizens had retreated to the cool shade of their homes. He wiped his brow. “Where are you taking me?”
&n
bsp; “This way,” the knight replied and pointed down the street.
In the distance, the steady clang of metal being shaped under a smith’s hammer answered. They followed it into a nondescript alley where the blast of the bellows stirred the air from the workshop housed inside.
The smith had his back to them, but stopped his work when they approached. “You’ve brought me a visitor, Sir Fane.”
“Indeed, I have, Foresco. I hope this is not an inconvenient time.”
“Not at all.” The man turned around, his sightless eyes clouded white, and nodded to them. “I’ve been expecting you, Prince Kell.”
A shiver of unease raced down his back, making him forget about the oppressive heat. He’d mentioned to Fane a couple of weeks ago that he wanted to meet the elven swordsmith and ask about his weapon, but nothing could have prepared him for this.
Foresco laid his hammer aside and moved to a barrel of water, splashing it on his face and silver hair. Then, using the wall as his guide, he ventured into the hidden courtyard tucked away on the other side of his workshop. “Please join me, gentlemen. I had my apprentice fetch us some chilled wine.”
Kell exchanged a glance with Fane, silently asking if what he was seeing was real. The knight nodded, encouraging him forward, and they sat at the table beside a gurgling fountain.
“I appreciate you receiving us without warning,” Fane said, taking the glass of wine that Foresco offered him.
The elf laughed. “I had plenty of warning. Ivis gave me sight beyond sight for a reason.”
Kell’s brow puckered. “Ivis? Is she another one of your Gravarian gods?”
“The only goddess as far as I’m concerned.” Foresco’s serene smile softened the harsh whites of his scarred eyes. “You may know her as the Lady Moon.”
Finally, a deity he was familiar with. He rested his hand on the hilt of his sword. “I wanted to talk to you about the sword you made for my father years ago.”
The elf shook his head. “No, I made it for you, Prince Kell. My creations are meant for one person, and I take extra care to ensure that only that person can use it.”
So far, he backed up what Dev had told him. “But I was a mere child when you created this. How did you know to create a sword that would feel so perfect in my hands when I hadn’t even reached my adult years?”
A Soul For Chaos (The Soulbearer Trilogy) Page 20
