She had a way of making him look at things differently.
“No, he did the right thing.” Jacob could see that his brother had tried to stay loyal to him, and he wanted to feel that was enough. Biting back his jealousy, he lifted her hand and kissed it. “I understand.” He swallowed hard. “But is it possible you and Samuel are too close?”
She didn’t flinch as she turned her gaze out the window. An uncomfortable silence filled the carriage, but he resisted the desire to prod her.
She finally nodded. “That thought crossed my mind while you were in Virginia.”
Hurt engulfed him, and indignation against Samuel burned. Jacob fought the temptation to withdraw into himself and say nothing.
He lowered the visor on the front windshield, blocking the sun. “But”—he cleared his throat, trying to find his voice—“you still want to marry me, right?”
“Jacob,”—disbelief radiated in her eyes—“are you having second thoughts?”
“What? No. Of course not.”
“Then why would you ask me that?”
“I feel insecure about us. Can you blame me?”
She sighed. “I’m doing all I know to prevent that. What else can I do?”
He had the answer. It was as clear as the cloudless spring day ahead of them. They needed to get away from Samuel as soon as possible. But Jacob feared if he suggested that right now, it would be too much of a shock to her and possibly challenge her desire to marry him. And he knew they needed nothing else to undermine them at the moment.
Nothing.
He shrugged, and she looked out the window.
Thoughts of walking on the beach by himself mere days ago came to him, and it seemed the lostness between Rhoda and him right now was as vast as the breadth and depth of the ocean he’d once enjoyed.
For the life of him, he couldn’t see a way to get her to leave Maine for months to come. He’d love to. But even if he could get permission to marry her outside of the wedding season, they couldn’t do so until he went through instruction and joined the faith. That’d take the rest of the summer. Besides, she wouldn’t leave Kings’ Orchard in a bind, and she’d need months to train Leah and Iva to handle the canning business without her—if she was willing to leave the work in their hands. Landon knew a lot about Rhoda’s side of the business. He’d been with her for years, and Jacob was sure he’d stay here, near Leah. That was good.
But for now all Jacob could do was stay close to Rhoda, be the man she’d fallen in love with, and go through the steps to join the faith.
TWENTY-EIGHT
Sunlight dispersed through the greenhouse like a soft glow from a halo as Rhoda watered the herbs. Her thoughts were as numerous as the drops of water spraying from the hose. The battle with the frost had been over for almost a week, and by all outward signs, it appeared they’d won. So why did she feel so defeated?
She ran her fingers across the petals of the scarlet bergamot and the soft, leafy gray greens of sage. Almost two months ago the police had returned these containers with mostly dead plants, but she’d nursed them back to health—or planted new ones. Could she be as successful in cultivating her relationship with Jacob?
Landon opened the door, the backpack with his computer on his shoulder. “There you are.”
“I thought you were staying home today to update the website.”
“I was, but a couple of things about the site came up that I need to talk to you about before I approach Samuel with them in a few days … or weeks, whenever he finds the time.”
“I doubt he’ll like the topic.”
“It’s not his favorite, but it’s not yours either. I think it’s a necessary evil in order to increase the number of wholesale buyers for your goods.” He set his backpack on a table away from any moisture. “Since Samuel hasn’t really looked at your website, I don’t want to spring something on him that might freak him out. So I wanted to get your approval first.” He took a seat on the dry workbench next to his equipment. “I’ve been hunting for you. Where’s your two-way?”
“I left it at Camilla’s this morning.”
“Why do I get the feeling you did that on purpose?”
She released the nozzle, shutting off the water. Indeed, she had knowingly walked out without it. Leave it to Landon to realize that. Of course, on his side, he had years of knowing her. But if she could be easily reached, Phoebe would want her to come in for lunch. Samuel would have business questions, and with Jacob back she didn’t want to be around him. Steven would use it to ask where she was, and then he’d look at her as if he knew what was best for her more than she did. Someone always wanted something, and today she had nothing to give, not right now anyway. And Jacob, well, he wasn’t far, and since he seemed to know where she was all the time, he could find her whenever he wished.
She didn’t want to explain her behavior to Landon, though. Hopefully, she could redirect his questions. “What’s up?”
“Don’t want to answer me, eh?”
She flicked the hose his way, making the spray of water hit just short of him.
“Hey!” He grabbed his backpack and put it behind him.
She released the nozzle. “Could you get to the point?”
“Keep the water away and I will.”
While he got out his computer and set it up, she turned off the water and hung the nozzle on a nail, then grabbed a scrap of a dry towel from its hook.
He pulled his phone from his pocket, touched the screen several times, and set it beside his computer. “I’d like to create a montage with music and a voice-over. It’ll need to be uploaded to YouTube, but then I can put it on your site.”
She dried her hands. “Despite teaching me a few computery things over the years, you have to know I understood almost nothing of what you just said.”
“I figured.” He tapped on his keyboard, opening a web page. “Here, look at this.”
She moved in closer to see the monitor.
“This is YouTube. It’s an Internet site where video clips can be uploaded, like this one.” He clicked on an arrow covering a picture of some type, and it began playing.
She watched as an Englisch man in an orchard started talking. “How’d you get an Internet connection out here?”
“It’s called a Personal Hotspot, and the connection is coming through my iPhone. And this”—he clicked on an icon in a sidebar—“is a video I’d like to put on your website. This is only on my computer. I haven’t uploaded it yet.”
Colorful images of the orchard floated across the screen.
He clicked again, only this time the video became as large as his laptop screen. “Iva took the photos, and I played with them until they come across like a movie.”
She wound the towel this way and that, fidgeting. “This is from pictures?”
“Yep. All I needed was a little time with them and a program called Final Cut Pro.”
A few of the snapshots showed distant images of them tending the orchard—Samuel, Jacob, Leah, Steven, Landon, and Rhoda. Tastefully done, giving a feel for the work without showing or blurring their faces. “Iva’s really good, isn’t she?”
“She definitely has a good eye for photography. When I asked her about it, she said free lessons came with the camera, and she went to every one she could. Anyway, I’d like to add some background music to it with either written words or a voice-over to tell a bit about the orchard, unless that’s a problem.”
“Create it. Then see what Samuel thinks. Since it’s been done this carefully, I imagine he’ll be fine with it.”
“Okay.” He closed the laptop and slid it into its case. “I’d like to say that’s all I need to know, but it’s not.”
She tucked the towel into the bib of her apron. “What’s next?”
“It’s a mixture of personal and business.” He fidgeted with his computer bag, zipping and unzipping one of the compartments. “There’s a lot riding on the success of this orchard, and I never doubted that you and the Kings w
ould know what to do to restore these trees, but lately it seems like your green thumb and determination may not be enough.”
“No, there are always weather issues and pests to contend with, and we can only do so much to battle those.”
He looked up from the computer bag in his lap, disbelief in his eyes. “You really think that’s what I’m talking about?”
Now that he called her on it and made her realize she was being dismissive, no, that’s not what she thought he meant. Something was eating at him, and, want to or not, she was about to find out what it was.
“Is everything between you and Jacob going to be okay?”
It had taken a lot for Landon to confront her like this. So much so she actually felt sorry for him. When she went to him to discuss anything, he didn’t mind sharing his opinion, but he wasn’t one to probe into her relationships.
She leaned her back against the work station, inches from her friend, staring at the dirt floor. “No, everything isn’t right. But it will be. It’ll take some time, but my will is set on restoring our relationship just as much as it is on protecting the orchard from all dangers, like the frost.”
When Landon didn’t respond, she turned to look at him.
He intertwined his fingertips and circled one thumb around the other. “You’re in love with him?”
“Yes. Absolutely. And it’s in poor taste that you’d even question me on that.”
“Ah, come on, Rhodes. You said you set your will toward mending the relationship, and you compared it to revitalizing the orchard, which is taking massive efforts from everyone.”
“That’s not what I meant, and you know it.” She went to her bergamot, finding a moment of pleasure in the brilliant red flowers. “Like a garden, relationships have times when they need extra tending.” She inhaled the citrusy, earthy aroma of the plant. “These are far more than just pretty. Their greatest strength is their medicinal effects. A poultice with this can heal skin infections and wounds. Jacob and I are finding ways to apply natural healing to our relationship. That’s all.”
“What happened between you and Samuel that set off the worst in Jacob?”
She touched her lips, remembering the power of those few moments. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Are you kidding me? Of course it matters. I’ve kept my mouth shut for too long. But between Jacob and Samuel and the business, I want to make sure you’re watching out for yourself.” He crossed his arms. “So what happened?”
“We kissed.” She didn’t have to tell him to keep it between them. She knew he would.
Landon lowered his head, shaking it. “Rhodes.”
“It didn’t mean any—”
“Do not finish that sentence.” He pointed at her. “I don’t want to hear it or be forced to figure out whether you’re lying.” He paused before rolling his eyes. “What were you thinking to get so attached to Samuel?”
Couldn’t Landon see? It had happened so naturally, so organically, she hadn’t realized it’d taken root until she was in his arms. “You’re angry with me.”
“No.” He elongated the word, sounding quite perturbed. “But I’m aggravated about the position you’ve put yourself in. For the first time in your life, you have the chance to be really happy, a kind of joy that can build from year to year, as it should.” He got off the table and put his hands on her shoulders. “Look, I want whatever you want. You believe that right?”
She nodded. “Ya.” It was his strong suit—to long for his friends to get their heart’s desire.
He removed his ball cap and raked his hand through his hair. “So what do you want?”
“A life with Jacob.”
He sighed and put on his cap. “Then you’d better pull your act together.”
His words felt like a slap across her face. “What does that mean?”
He blinked. “You don’t see it, do you? Your eyes light up whenever Samuel comes into view. He can be a speck on a distant hill, and what’s evident on your face isn’t good, not for you and Jacob. When Samuel says anything, whether in the office, field, or at the kitchen table, you’re intense, wanting to hear his opinion. You may not agree with him, but when he speaks, it carries weight.”
Her skin rippled with pinpricks as embarrassment rushed through her. “Don’t be ridiculous. I like Samuel a lot. But that’s all you’re seeing. We simply let a fleeting emotion rule our actions.”
There, she’d finally confessed. Unfortunately, in doing so she could see why she’d defended Samuel so strongly to Jacob. And why Jacob felt slighted by what must’ve sounded like a half-hearted apology. From the moment Samuel had pulled her close, she’d wanted to kiss him as much as he had her. But that only meant they were two lonely, single people who were attracted to each other and had been forced into close quarters for too long, right?
She swallowed hard. That was right, wasn’t it? “I haven’t been fair to Jacob.”
Landon angled his head, staring at her. “Well, there’s good news—when Jacob is around, you’re better at controlling your reactions to Samuel. You barely let yourself look his way. But if you intend to keep Jacob and give Samuel the signals of a woman who’s already taken, I suggest you deal with what’s between you and Samuel before Jacob catches a real glimpse of it. If you don’t, all your work ethic and green-thumb skills won’t be able to fix the damage.”
Deal with it how? Maybe she should’ve talked to Landon long before now. “I … I have no idea what that means.”
“Understand what you feel for Samuel and own up to it. Once you’ve faced it, file it. Then you’re free to use all the space inside you for Jacob. You had to file things away when Emma died, didn’t you?”
“The only thing I was successful at concerning Emma was owning up to how I felt. I was guilty, and I didn’t know how to file that. It took up all the room in my heart and my every thought for years.”
“I remember, but this is different. You didn’t have a choice with Emma, and that kind of pain and shock takes years. With Samuel, this is your decision.”
“Okay. I see what you mean.” Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a hazy image of her sister. Rhoda turned.
Emma.
Her sister stood there, hands folded, a warm smile on her lips. Then she faded away. Rhoda hadn’t seen her in weeks. Why now?
“Rhodes?” Landon touched her shoulder.
She pulled back from her thoughts, ready to change the subject. “How are you and Leah?”
She would still prefer for Leah to join the faith. Loyalty was the key to the most godly, obedient lives. Wasn’t it? “You’re still going out?”
“Yeah. But she’s young and trying to figure out which way is up. That’s even harder inside an Amish world that says there is only one way up—through the Ordnung.”
“You sound like you’re ready for whatever she decides.”
“She may not know for years yet, but I’ll stick by my motto: hope for the best, be braced for the worst.”
“You finally know what you want out of life.” Rhoda remembered how adrift he’d been about life when she’d first met him. But even then his actions had matched who he was—relaxed as his boat bobbed on the ocean.
“Yep. Apparently you do too. So don’t sabotage yourself, okay?”
Ready for time alone, she picked up the nozzle. “You should take your computer and go before—”
“Landon?” Phoebe called through the two-way.
“Yeah?”
“Do you know where Rhoda is?”
Landon raised his eyebrows, asking what he needed to do.
She took the two-way. “In the third greenhouse. Why?”
“Camilla’s here. She’s asked to see you and Samuel. She’d like to see you alone, so she’s waiting for you at her car.”
Did she have news about her granddaughter? “Coming.”
If Camilla had good information, wouldn’t she want to talk in the house?
Nervousness hounded Rhoda as she rushed toward the dri
veway. If she’d gotten their hopes up for nothing, she’d struggle for years to find peace with herself.
TWENTY-NINE
Samuel had been in the office when Bob pulled up. Now they were standing near the Cranfords’ car, talking while waiting for Rhoda. Samuel was sure Jacob would appear out of thin air soon. He’d barely let Rhoda out of his sight since returning home last Sunday.
Camilla held a rolled paper in one hand while gazing toward the orchard. “Is she far?”
“No.” He touched the two-way attached to his suspenders. “She was in a greenhouse. Would you care to come into the house or the office and sit?”
“No. I just need to see both of you. We’ll only be here a minute. I need to get off my feet soon.”
Rhoda had shared her hunches with them five days ago, but Samuel couldn’t tell if they had good or distressing news.
He removed his straw hat. “I’m surprised to see you up and about this soon, Camilla.”
Bob shoved his hands into his pockets. “She’s worn out. But there was no keeping her in that bed another day.”
“Hello!” Rhoda waved, hurrying toward them.
Camilla unrolled the paper. “Look! We went to the records office in Augusta this morning.”
As soon as Rhoda could, she eased the paper from Camilla. Once Rhoda read it, she beamed at Samuel before she moved to stand beside him. It only took a glance to see it was a copy of a birth certificate!
Rhoda looked up at him, so relieved. “Sophia Grace Dumont.”
Samuel was speechless. He’d believed in Rhoda and the gift God gave her, and yet as he stared at the proof, he couldn’t wrap his mind around the enormity of it.
For Every Season Page 24
