by Tiffani Lynn
About an hour later, Jase comes back through the door in running gear. Did he jog to his booty call? That’s a little weird, but hey, I wouldn’t turn him away if he showed up all sweaty on my front porch for that sort of thing.
“Couldn’t sleep?” he asks, a little out of breath.
“Yeah. It’s okay, though.” I try to play it off like it’s no big deal because I’ve been so needy in front of him up to this point, I don’t want him to think I’m always this way. Inside though I’m silently begging him to invite me in. I haven’t sleep as soundly as I did when I was with him since I was a little kid, before my family went off the rails.
He stares at me for a minute and strides out of the room. Guess he didn’t like that answer. He’s probably worried the noise from the television will keep him up so I lower the volume almost all the way down and do my best to focus on the movie.
Ten minutes later the door to his room creaks open and with the flicker from the television I can tell he’s wearing a T-shirt and baggy gym shorts. Maybe he wants the TV off all the way. I guess I could sit here in the dark by myself, but I’d rather not.
“Marina, come on.” He waves me toward the bedroom and it takes a second to register that he’s inviting me in. I look around like there might be someone else here because I’m so surprised he’s asking me.
A little more impatiently this time, he says, “Mari, if you want to sleep, come on.”
I leap up and toss the blanket to the couch, afraid he’ll change his mind. I could practically skip to his room for this. I know it’s only so I can sleep and nothing more, he was probably with his chick a little while ago, but I can live the dream in my head where no one will know.
It’s dark in his room but after being here last night, I know his bed is in the center so I climb in on the side closest to the door like last night. Before it can get awkward as I decide if I should stay along the edge or curl up to him, he spreads his arm across the bed and invites, “Come on, don’t waste time lying over there.”
My heart rate kicks up. I don’t care if he was with someone an hour ago, I just want to be held close, to feel safe, to sleep in comfort with this sexy beast of a man. It sounds desperate because it is, but I simply don’t care.
He’s on his back so I crawl up and stretch out along his side with my head on his shoulder and my arm over his stomach. His arm wraps around me and his other arm lies across his belly under where mine is but close enough that I can feel the heat from his skin. Oh, God, this feels so damn good. “Thank you,” I whisper in the dark, unable to keep my emotions in check.
With a quick squeeze, he replies, “You’re welcome, get some sleep.” And I do. It doesn’t take long as I listen to the steady cadence of his heartbeat before I’m out for the night.
When I wake up the next day I’m sprawled out alone in Jase’s bed. My face is buried in his pillow while the covers are pulled up over me and I grin as his scent brings me back to the night before when I fell asleep with a smile on my face.
That afternoon I stop by Reggie’s to see Dee. I want to tell her about my night with Jase and see how she’s doing. I’m used to seeing her at least once every day and I haven’t been able to for the last several days. When I knock on the door, Ray, Reggie’s asshole from hell roommate, opens it. Bloodshot eyes and the stench of pot stench surround him, alerting me to the fact that he’s baked beyond belief. They guy always looks like shit. Dirty, sleazy and just plain gross, but he’s got the nicest sneakers and ball caps in town. He hasn’t figured out that it doesn’t matter how sweet the gear is for your head and feet, if you’re dirty and reek of pot while looking homeless, people are going to scatter when you enter a room. Why does Reggie live with this dirtbag?
“Marina,” he greets, perusing me from head to toe. Gross.
“Ray, I’m looking for Dee.”
“Yeah that bitch has been here so often she needs to fork over some damn rent. Come in. Now you could stay here rent-free. I even have a bed you can sleep in.” His cackle that screams heavy smoker as he laughs at his own joke does nothing but annoy me. There’s not enough money in the world for me to get in his bed. I’d rather sleep on the street with the homeless guys or have permanent insomnia than get anywhere near his bed.
I move quickly past him, calling for Dee. I need her to appear quickly. Ray sets off all the creeper alarm bells in my head so I hate to be alone with him even for a minute. Dee comes out with her hair in rollers and her makeup half on. “Sorry, getting ready for work. Come in.” She pulls me to Reggie’s room and I sit on the toilet with the lid down and tell her about the last couple of days.
“So you really slept in his bed? Like, cuddled with him too?”
I nod and give her a shy smile.
“Wow. Didn’t see that coming. He doesn’t come across as the cuddle type.”
“I agree, me either. Maybe I was keeping him up with the TV noise. I don’t know, but it was nice. I slept better with him than I even sleep with you.”
“I bet.” Her eyebrows rise to her hairline.
“No, you perv. Nothing happened. I mean, he woke up with morning wood the first day, but he was gone today before I knew it.”
We giggle and chat for the next 15 minutes while she gets ready for work, and I feel light as I go to my new job. A good night’s sleep next to a beautiful, strong man and some giggles with your best friend will do that.
My first night of work is an eventful one. The bar I now work at is rough, but they were willing to hire and train me quickly since they’re short-staffed. It’s a biker bar downtown and it seems the roughest of the rough come here. The clientele is loud, rowdy and wild, but luckily most of them seem harmless.
When I get back to Jase’s apartment he’s already in bed and my stomach sinks, realizing I have to go to my empty bed or the couch. I want to go crawl in bed with him, but I don’t want to assume it’s okay. I don’t want to walk in on him if he has company either. I shower and prepare for bed. Then I return to my spot on the couch and turn on the TV. I haven’t settled on a channel when the door to Jase’s room opens and he calls, “Come on, Mari.”
A smile is on my face before he can blink. I leap from the couch and haul ass to the bed. As soon as he lies down I curl up tight to him and breathe a sigh of relief. It feels so good to be here. I don’t want to go back to my empty apartment tomorrow. I’d much rather stay like this every night.
“You cooked for me.” It’s a statement rather than a question that comes out of nowhere so I’m not sure what to say.
“Well, yeah. You’ve let me stay here this week. I’m just trying to repay the favor. I’ll get the dishes in the morning before I leave. My apartment will be ready tomorrow supposedly.”
“I already did the dishes. You leave tomorrow?”
“Yeah. The landlord said the door would be fixed.”
Several minutes of quiet go by and the steady thump of his heartbeat is about to lull me to sleep when he says, “Never had anyone cook for me at home.”
“I thought you ate with Quinn and Judson all the time.”
“I do, at their house. I’ve never, not even as a kid, had someone make dinner for me, not outside of foster care and that didn’t really count. It was nice the last couple of days. Thank you.”
“Not even your grandma?”
“No, she wasn’t in the best of health so she told me what to do and I cooked.”
My heart warms knowing I’ve given him that. Not once but twice. Praying I won’t freak him out I reach up and run my fingers along the short hair of his scalp. I’ve wanted to touch his hair and face so badly since he’s reappeared in my life, so I might as well do it now. There won’t be another chance because I’ll be gone tomorrow, back in my apartment and he’ll be here. As my fingers move over the silky strands, he nuzzles into the touch like he’s trying to get closer.
“Mmmm. Feels good.” Bravery rises inside me and I trail my fingers away from his hair, over his jaw, along the five o’clock shadow
that darkens his jaw and down over his lips. When I pause midway across his lips he kisses my fingers softly and heat floods between my legs. Losing my fear by the second as my hormones kick in, I prop up on my elbow and search his face in the moonlight. The striking eyes that I love so much are shrouded in darkness, but I can tell he’s watching me. I trail my fingers lightly down his neck and over his T-shirt. When I reach the hem, I slide my fingers inside and back up. Goose bumps spread all over his torso and I decide if I’m going to make my move it should be now.
My leg slides over his hips and I straddle him. Words can’t describe the thrill I feel when I find him hard between my legs. I rock a little against him and a deep groan vibrates from within him. His hands adjust to rest on my hips and when he doesn’t push me away I take that as the go sign. I shimmy my tank top over my head and toss it to the floor leaving me bare from the waist up and guide his right hand up to cover my exposed breast. Don’t lose your nerve, I tell myself. When the warmth of his palm covers the cool skin, I rock against him again and whimper quietly. Without me prompting him, his thumb slides across the peaked nipple and I rock more, setting up a little rhythm. His other hand takes over the other breast and it feels so damn good. I shiver as he continues and cry out when he plucks the sensitive peaks.
When I can’t take it anymore, I drop to the side and slip off my little sleep shorts and panties. As I hook my fingers in the waistband of his shorts, I ask, “May I?” I’m praying he won’t stop me.
Instead of answering he hooks his fingers in the backside of the waistband and helps me to take them down. Normally, being this close to his cock with my mouth would prompt me to swallow him, but I crave something different tonight so I climb back up and over him. His hot flesh rests between the lips of my sex and I want to slide down on him, but instead I lean forward and place a tentative kiss to his lips. “Jase.”
“Get a condom. Side drawer next to the bed.” His deep, sex-laced voice could tell me to go get a machete and cut off a toe and I’d probably do it. When I pass it to him, he lifts my hips and fiddles around until the condom is on, then I lower myself onto him as slowly as I can, savoring each fraction of his enormous cock as it fills and stretches me until he’s buried all the way.
“Mari,” he whispers to me through the dark, not to get my attention, but more of a plea. I love when he uses the shorter version of my name and the little hint of Spanish comes out.
With one of his hands on my breast and one on my hip to guide me, the speed of my motion increases and it feels good, but I need more. Tilting forward I plant my hands on his chest the shift in angle allows me to go faster. I’m bouncing hard on him now, completely lost in the fullness and it feels so damn good.
“I’m almost there Jase, God, I’m so close.”
The hand on my breast slips down between us and with very little effort his fingers find my clit and rub circles. My entire body seizes up as my orgasm consumes me. Every muscle, every nerve, every centimeter of skin is in the middle of a sweet fire overload. I’ve never felt anything like it before. I’ve gotten off before, but never quite like this. When everything begins to loosen up, he grips both of my hips to hold me in place and hammers into me until he groans and his hips jerk erratically with his release. Absolutely spent, I fall forward onto his chest and breathe a relaxed sigh. There’s no awkward pause as he wraps his arms around me and holds me tight against him. My heart melts a little when I feel his lips press to my hair and his chest expand under me in a deep breath. I wish I could stay exactly like this with him buried deep, both of us sated, wrapped in his arms forever. But I know tomorrow I go back to my apartment and he goes back to whomever he’s seeing. I turn and kiss his breastbone over his T-shirt, which I notice never came off, and lay my head back down.
After a minute or so he taps my right ass cheek twice and says, “I’ve got to get rid of this.” I roll off to the side and start feeling around for my tank top. I can’t find the damn thing in the dark.
“Can you hit the light so I can find my top please?”
“No.”
“No?”
He climbs back on the bed and pulls me down into his arms like we started out a little while ago, only this time his shirt is gone and we’re skin to skin. This is heaven for me. I could cry I’m so happy, but I don’t want him to know how much the physical connection means to me. That would probably freak him out. I need to relax and play this cool. Forcing myself to settle it doesn’t take long before I drift off to another amazing night of sleep.
The next morning when I wake he’s gone and I want to cry at the loss. I hate that I won’t come home to him anymore or ever get another night like last night. Before I leave I cook his dinner and put it in the fridge with a note on the counter so he’ll know to look for it.
Jase,
Dinner is in the fridge. My apartment door is fixed so I’m going home and getting out of your hair. I bet you’ll like having the quiet back. I appreciate all you’ve done for me. I’ll drop the key off at the station because I need it to lock the door on my way out. Take care of yourself.
Love,
Mari
My chest literally hurts when I leave his place and it only gets worse when I open the door to mine and remember I may have a place to stay but absolutely nothing in it. I need to take my tips from last night to the Laundromat to wash the stuff Quinn let me borrow. It’ll take a few more days to be able to buy some clothes. I don’t have rent money set aside yet so I have to get that before anything else. I forgot how bad this situation was while I was in the sweet little bubble with Jase. I wasn’t going to sleep anyway, since I’d be alone, so I guess it doesn’t matter that I don’t have a blanket or pillow available to sleep on the floor with, which makes me wonder again who the hell steals dirty sheets and underwear? This person must be a desperate freak so I try hard not to think about it.
After an hour of doing nothing, because there’s nothing to do, I leave for work. It’s another night in paradise. The guys in the crowd tonight are rowdier than the first night and borderline overboard. If my ass gets smacked or groped one more time, I’m likely to lose my mind. Most of the time I can ignore it and keep moving, but after about the 25th swat my irritation hit an all-time high.
When I clock out and take the bus home, a strange dude with skinny jeans and a band T-shirt sits a few rows behind me and I can tell he’s staring at me because the little hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. There’s something familiar about him, but I’m not going to turn around for a better look because I’m so freaked out. Besides, when you ride the bus this late you see all kinds of special creatures around town, so it could be my overactive imagination.
As the bus reaches my stop, I stand and walk down the aisle. It takes everything I have not to glance back. The doors close behind me and I shuffle into my apartment building, cussing my shitty life and wishing I were wrapped up with Jase again. Why can’t that be my life? Why can’t he be my guy and my future? And what will I do when Dee gets married and I’m completely alone? It’s inevitable. She can’t stay single to live with me forever. I push that thought aside because I can’t think of it right now either. It’s too much to process—all that’s happened and then to add Dee leaving me to the mix.
I shower and drip dry and throw on the tank top and shorts from last night. I hand-washed my panties during my shower so they’re hanging on a hook in the bathroom, drying for tomorrow.
I turn up the heat and lie on the floor with all the lights on. My electric bill is going to be ridiculous this month but I can’t even rest if I’m cold. I’m only lying here feeling sorry for myself for about 20 minutes when someone bangs on my door. I’m not expecting anyone so the abrupt sound scares the crap out of me.
Peeking through the peephole I find Jase standing there with his hands on his hips and a nasty scowl on his face. I tug my tanks top down to cover myself and open the door. “Jase.”
“Mari, what the hell are you doing?” He asks angrily pushing pas
t me to get inside.
“Um. Trying to rest?” What’s that supposed to mean?
“On the floor? Or did you get a mattress today?”
“You know I don’t have the cash to replace my stuff right now. I’m fine.”
“Where’s Dee?”
“At Reggie’s.”
“Yeah, you know why?” He has the sarcasm down pat.
“Because she has a boyfriend?”
His scowl is fierce. “No, because she knows there’s nowhere to sleep, no clothes to wear and nothing to eat. Get dressed.”
“’What? Why?” Who’s he ordering around? Has he lost his mind?
“Don’t be stupid, Mari. You’re staying at my place. I’ve got a washer and dryer, a blanket and pillows, and food in the damn fridge. Now get what little shit you have here and follow me back to my place.”
“Um.”
“What?” His impatience is obvious.
“I don’t have a car to follow you.”
“Shit! I forgot about that.” He throws his hands in the air. “You’re killing me. Get your stuff.”
I probably should be mad with how condescending he’s being, but I’m excited to go back to his place that I push the irritation aside and hurry to the bathroom to gather my wet clothes.
He’s silent and brooding in the car on the way to his place and I can’t stand it so I chatter the whole way. At one point, he looks at me like he’d rather shove burning onions in his ears than hear me talk anymore, but I can’t help myself. When I enter his apartment I finally stop talking and shuffle toward the room that was mine before and to set my stuff down.
“When you get changed just come in my room; don’t bother with the TV routine.”
My eyes widen. Did I hear him right?
“I think we’re past that, don’t you?” he asks me.
