I ran in front of him, stopping him and ready to lay into him more, when I saw the smile on his face.
"Why are you smiling?"
"Because you just made the point for me. You did the best you could in a bad situation. This isn't your fault."
"I can't let the senator take what little they have left." I turned away from him and started walking again. I didn't want him to see how close to breaking down I was.
"We won't."
I shook my head. "Cormac, there is no more 'we'."
He didn't say anything and I didn't look at him as we fell back into silence.
***
I stared at the small group gathered in the penthouse. It was only the people who were absolutely trustworthy. There were the old standbys, Buzz, Dodd, Dark and Burrom, and the new kids, Colleen, Sharon, Chip and Katie.
"I'm sorry I called you all here without notice but we've got some intel. It's not good." I'd sent Dark, the first person I saw upon our arrival back, to round them up while I changed into clothes that weren't soaked through with melted snow. In true Dark efficiency, he had everyone there by time I'd pulled on dry jeans and a sweater.
"What's up?" Dark asked, speaking for everyone.
"Looks like the senator is preparing to move against us." I looked over at Cormac, who stood there expressionless, waiting to see if he was going to contribute. I looked around the room as everyone still had their eyes trained on me. "There is news that he's gathering together an army."
"Who's the source? Is it reliable?" Colleen asked.
"I trust it. I don't have any more details right now. But I don't know when, or how many. That's what we need to find out." I perched on the arm of one sofa, swinging my leg. "I'm going to ask the senator for a meeting on his turf."
The immediate roar of "no's" that came from the group surprised me. I was expecting push back from Cormac, but not the emphatic response from everyone else.
Dark grabbed my arm from where he sat next to me on the couch. "If you die, we might all be screwed."
It wasn't the exact sentiment you want to hear at the thought of your death but I understood enough to joke about it. "Please, Dark, I know you care for me and all but hold yourself together, man."
The ramifications of my death weren't something any of us ever openly discussed. No one was sure if the theory that my death could possibly kill everyone was correct or not.
"For the same reason you don't want me to go, I'm the perfect distraction. He won't kill me. And while I'm there, drawing his attention, you can get in easier and see what we're up against." Their expressions looked hesitant and I waited for someone to argue the point but it was Cormac who finally decided to speak.
"No." It was a single command, not up for debate.
"The way things are run have changed since you left. We're a democracy now." I turned to look at him. He was standing with a hand resting above the fireplace, his body angled away from it, and the firelight made his eyes nearly glow. I broke eye contact first, his full attention unsettling me in ways I'd prefer not to acknowledge.
No one else in the room seemed to have a problem staring at the two of us. I actually thought that perhaps I should move closer to him so they didn't have to strain their necks back and forth between the two of us.
"This is my building, my call," he said from across the room.
"And it's my body." Why didn't I say my choice? I didn't need to look at him to know he'd picked up on the slip. He caught everything.
"This is a business matter. I thought we were in agreement?" I said.
"We didn't agree on this."
No one spoke as we played verbal ping-pong.
"I've been around a lot longer than you. My word is still final in this place."
"Not anymore. You've been gone and things changed."
The words were out before I even thought about the fact that I'd just thrown down the gauntlet and in front of witnesses. I was pinning him into a corner and neither of us would back down from the fight.
It didn't matter. I'd said it and I'd meant it. I wasn't looking to fight with him, but I wasn't living under anyone's rule, not even Cormac's.
I waited for the response that surely would come but the only thing he did was eye up the rest of the room. En mass, they grabbed their stuff and quickly left at the silent order. It was hard not to be envious of the silent command. Last time I'd tried that, people asked if I had something stuck in my eye. Maybe I squinted too much.
No time to ponder it now as WWVI, or whatever number we were up to—seriously, who could keep track, anymore—was about to go down.
As the last footsteps faded away and I knew we were the only ones left in the room, I turned, prepared for battle.
And he was smiling?
"What's wrong with you?" This was worse than a fight. Maybe he was all messed up from the magic. I didn't like when he smiled; he had dimples to die for. I really needed to stay grounded, but it's odd how dents in someone's face could add so much appeal.
"Nothing." Still smiling, God damn his dimpled face.
"Why did you send everyone out?"
"Because I can't let them think I'm fine with what you just did. They'd think I went soft. Next thing you know, people would stop listening to my orders and then I'd have to kill someone. This seemed easier. Let them think I'm beating you in private." He flashed me a smile in contrast to his statement.
"Well, just stop looking at me like that."
"Like what?" He moved a few feet closer and leaned a hip against the bar, smirking now.
"Like you're proud of me or something."
He crossed his arms over his chest, perfectly relaxed while I felt ready to jump out of my skin. And it all came down to time, again. He'd had plenty of it and I'd swear it gave him an edge in dealing with emotions. Then I saw his chest rise a little bit more rapidly than it should for someone completely relaxed. I realized the only thing time had done was let him fake it better.
"What's wrong with that?"
"Everything. You don't get to be proud of me, or look at me like that. I'm not your daughter, wife or friend. We are business associates. That's it." I stood and stepped a few feet closer, making a waving gesture to encompass my body. "You have no ownership of this that should inspire pride within your being."
"And yet, I have this strange warm fuzziness inside that feels oddly like pride. Strange." He made a mocking show of surprise.
"Just stop."
"If you don't like how I look at you, ignore me."
I turned and walked to the table and decided to do exactly that. I put my head down and looked at the schedules I needed to get done and tried to pretend he wasn't even in the room. We had to kill at least another thirty minutes alone to keep up the charade, one I was willing to go along with if it kept the peace.
He came over and leaned a hip on the table right beside me. "Unless, that is, you can't?"
"I can ignore you just fine." I flipped a page over. "See this? I'm ignoring you right this very second."
He moved closer, leaning over me. "Really?" His fingers trailed over my arm.
"Yes." I refused to look at him again to confirm just how well I was ignoring him.
As his hand pushed my hair away from my neck, I was determinedly not going to turn into his arms. He'd left and I had some pride. I wasn't going to just fall at his feet now that he decided to return.
Then his lips made contact with my skin.
"I'm trying to work."
"Don't let me stop you."
"You're in my way." I motioned to how he was obscuring my papers, as if that was the only issue I had with this situation, not that my own chest was rising with my ragged breaths.
"Sorry, I'll get out of your way."
Instead of leaving though, he just stepped behind me, one arm wrapped around my waist as his other cupped my breast and his lips returned to my neck.
It was too much. I sighed and leaned back into him with a groan, thinking maybe, just this onc
e. How bad could that really be? One time. What was one time?
And then he spoke and ruined it.
"You might have forgotten you’re mine, but your body hasn't."
I pushed out of his embrace. "This isn't a game to me."
"You think I enjoy this?" His voice was low, soft and intense. Now, he was mad. "I came back, thinking about seeing you, only you. And what do I get? You basically tell me to go fuck myself. Nice homecoming."
"What did you expect, when you leave me with barely a goodbye? Just leave with no warning?"
He didn't answer but stormed into the bedroom and slammed the door.
"Hey! Now who's running?" I yelled. I wasn't sure if going into the bedroom was technically 'running' but he wasn't arguing. I wasn't above taking a point on default. If this was a game, at least I was winning.
Until I looked at the couch, also my bed for the night. Okay, maybe more like tied. It was hard to sell a win when you were walking bent over from a cramp in your back.
Chapter Eleven
Letting Loose
After last night, I was relieved at the prospect of unleashing some energy. With nowhere else to train, Burrom and I had cleared out the conference room for the time being and laid out whatever exercise mats we could find, padding yoga mats up in the gaps left. It looked a little ragtag so it was a good thing I healed quickly.
"I still don't see the point of this. I need to be working on controlling the magic, not wasting time." My hands were planted firmly on my yoga pant clad hips.
"I would've agreed with you until a few months ago. A pair of handcuffs, a piece of duct tape and you were useless." He tilted his head toward me, daring me to deny it.
"Okay, I see your point." There was no use in denying that before Burrom had shown up and a swarm of bugs flew to my rescue, I'd been cooked. "But I want it down, for the record, that I let them do that to me."
"If I were keeping a record, for your sake, I wouldn't write that down." He made a sour face in mocking.
"Whatever, tough guy. Let's get this going." I slipped off my sneakers and stepped onto the mat, ready to kick some butt.
"I don't want you to use any of your Keeper tricks."
Or get my butt kicked. My fun afternoon just took a nosedive. "Why not?"
"Because you don't know if they'll always work. What if he has some Keepers in his pocket, like Tracker did? What then? It's not like he hasn't been in cahoots with them before."
"Fine." I redid my ponytail and motioned for him to come at me. "No Keeper tricks. And, just for the record you won't keep, no one says cahoots anymore."
Now, for any of you that think when you see a 200 lb plus man heading toward you, even in sparring, you don't get at least slightly anxious, you're either crazy or you have bigger balls than I do.
So when Burrom came at me, I didn't mean to zap him with my Keeper tricks, or bring him to his knees gasping, it just happened.
I cringed as I watched him, palm on the mat, trying to catch his breath.
"I'm so sorry, Burrom." I leaned down slightly and moved my hand in the direction of his shoulder but froze. He might not want me to touch him right now.
"I thought we agreed you wouldn't do that." His breathing evened out but his tone was of someone still in pain.
"I didn't do it on purpose." I folded my hands together in front of me to avoid the urge to touch him.
He stood up slowly, looking like he was trying to shake off the pain in his arm, where I'd made contact.
He walked to the other side of the room and then turned and waited for me to look ready. But when I nodded I was, he shook his head and walked off a couple of steps.
"This isn't going to work."
"Why? I promise I'm not going to zap you again." I held both palms up.
"And you are going to do it anyway. If you did it before, when you were more relaxed, you're definitely going to do it now when you look like that."
"Like what?"
"All on edge."
"Well, stop scowling at me then."
"I'm sorry. It's hard not to scowl when my arm is still throbbing." He didn't sound sorry. He sounded like he wanted to throttle me.
I watched as he went and grabbed his funny phone from where it had been tucked in his shoe in the corner.
"Who you calling?" I had a bad feeling about this.
He held up his finger. "Can you meet me in the conference room for a little sparring?"
He said thanks and hung up before I could stop him.
"That better have been Dodd."
"Dodd isn't as good."
"Tell me you didn't just call Cormac?"
"I had to."
"And he's coming?"
He nodded.
It was my turn to pace away from him in annoyance. "I want to kill you right now."
"This is business. You go down and I'm sinking right along with you."
"Dodd would have been fine and you know it." I crossed my arms in front of my chest as I narrowed my eyes.
"Dodd would've pulled his punches."
"Oh, well yeah, that would've sucked." I snorted in annoyance and waited for Cormac to show.
I was sitting against the wall, kicking at the mat when he filled the doorway. I didn't look directly at him and he returned the favor.
"How's it going?" he asked Burrom.
"I tried. I can't do it."
"I didn't think it was going to work."
"You said this was your idea?" I accused Burrom.
"Technically, it was mine, Cormac just mentioned the need for it and he made really valid points."
Cormac looked around the room. "I can't spar here. It's too small. Let's go outside."
That got me to my feet and ended the charade of nonchalance. "It's cold, about to get dark, and worse, people will be able to see us." Did I have to explain this all to him?
"And you think you're always going to get to choose where you fight? It might be cold, dark and have people then, too."
"Fine," I was on a real winning streak now. "Let me get my jacket."
"No. The last thing you want is a bunch of bulky clothes when you fight. And if you know you're about to be attacked, get rid of them."
If it had been anyone else bossing me around right now, I swear, it would've been so much easier to be mature. But it wasn't.
It was Cormac. And I wasn't in a good enough mental place to deal with this, but I would. I wasn't ready to have this much psychical contact either, but again, I would. Why? Because I was in the mood to beat the hell out of him. And if I had to stay out there all day and night, I was determined to get a couple of good shots in. So when he turned and started walking, I followed after, a respectable distance away and enough space between us to interrogate Burrom.
"Can't believe you sold me out." I punched his arm as he walked next to me, Cormac in view ahead.
"Me? I had to apologize for like three hours just for getting in bed with you. I have to play nice now."
"Really?"
"Yes. It was exhausting. He even threatened to pull the liquor license on my club."
"Uh, there are no more liquor licenses."
"Not according to Cormac."
A twinge of guilt replaced the annoyance I'd been feeling. "I really didn't mean to give you up like that."
"Just get a good shot in for me."
It was still light out when we stepped into the courtyard, but I was grateful no one was paying much attention to us. I had no delusions, though. The small amount of privacy probably wouldn't last long.
Cormac stopped as he reached the center of the courtyard, about ten feet away from me.
"Give me everything you’ve got," he said. "Don't hold back."
"Nothing to worry about there," I countered, staring at him across from me in a snug shirt and work out pants.
"You know, all you are doing is misdirecting energy."
"You're saying my anger is misdirected…" I left the word desire off the sentence because there were som
e people listening.
"That's exactly what I'm saying."
"Absolutely not. Right now, I don't even like you."
He tilted his head back as he laughed. "Not only do you like me, but you might even?" He left the word love off and smiled mockingly.
"I do not."
"And even though you seem to have a violent streak," he paused taking in my lethal stare, "that might be getting worse, I'm still willing to have you."
"Just shut up and start."
"When you do fight, you can be an attacker, or counter fighter. Your short stature is going to be a problem, since you'll have to overcome your opponent's reach. In your case, I think you would be better off waiting for them to approach you and then try and catch an opening."
"Do something, already."
I held up my hands, trying to protect my face and ribs as I waited for him. I didn't have any formal training but I had gone through Oslo's street fighting boot camp. That's what we used to jokingly call it. I knew every dirty trick there was and had no shame using them.
We circled each other, as I eyed up potential weaknesses. Problem was, I didn't think he had any. I knew that I, on the other hand, had a ton. I probably weighed less than half of him, and couldn't move anywhere near as fast.
He lunged for me. I knew he was only moving at half speed because I dodged him easily. He made another halfhearted attempt. I've seen him move, he could be a hell of a lot quicker than that. Quick enough, in fact, that I wouldn't even see him if he didn't want me to.
"Now this is just getting insulting." I dropped my guard and stood still. "If we are going to do this, let's do it."
He didn't say anything but he nodded. His next move, all I saw was a blur and then I was catching my breath while lying flat on my back. Cormac's hand hovered over me, offering me help up. I ignored it and got to my feet unaided. I brushed off the residual snow from my back. The snow had been shoveled from the front courtyard but a thin coating remained.
I'd asked for this but it was still frustrating when I wanted to be the one kicking some butt. I prepared myself and looked around. A handful of people had made their way outside and were standing back watching and whispering. Here came the audience.
Redemption: Alchemy Series Book #4 Page 10
