“May I come in?”
Alicia couldn’t believe that she’d been so rude. It was just that she was trying to figure this out. What did Tori want?
When Alicia closed the door behind her, the two stood awkwardly in the massive foyer before Alicia led Tori to the living room. But as Tori sat on the love seat and Alicia, on the couch, the awkwardness remained. They sat, stiffly facing each other.
“So,” Tori began and then, she stopped, looked around the grand living room filled with photos of the Alexander’s. The place was still nicely decorated, but it felt more . . . homey. “This is really nice.”
“Thanks.”
Then there was more silence until they spoke together.
“Auntie.”
“Tori.”
They chuckled and both of them sat back.
“You look good, Auntie.”
“You do, too. Where are you living now? Did you move back to Chicago.?”
“I did. Doing my residency here. I thought that would be best,” she said, and lowered her head.
Alicia inhaled. Tori was still in love with Dallas. Of course—it had only been three months. She needed time ... and distance.
“Glad to hear you didn’t abandon school.” She paused again, struggling to find words. “So, what’re you doing in Dallas?”
Tori’s eyes were glassy when she looked up. “I came to see you.” She hesitated. “There is so much I want to say, so much I want to apologize for.” She sighed. “I wanted to win this one, Auntie. Even though I knew that you were better for Dallas, I wanted him.”
Alicia nodded. “You were in love and ...”
“No!”
The strength behind her exclamation surprised Alicia.
Tori continued, “I mean, yes, I did love him, but not the way you do. And he certainly didn’t love me the way he loves you.” Her chuckle was filled with bitterness. “I’ve never had that kind of love.” The tears that had welled in her eyes streamed down her face. “I’ve never really had love,” she cried. “Not even from you.”
Alicia’s heart cracked and she jumped up and joined her niece on the love seat. “That’s not true, Tori.” She pulled her head to her shoulder and held her. “I have always loved you. Loved you like you were my own daughter.”
“Then why didn’t keep me? Why didn’t you raise me?”
Alicia’s lips trembled as she thought back to those heartbreaking days. In the beginning, it had been so beautiful. She had a baby girl, even at the detriment of her marriage. But it didn’t matter. She loved Tori beyond anything that she ever thought possible. And the little girl had loved her back the same way.
Until the day James found out he had a daughter. He was angry at Alicia for keeping the secret. And even more pissed at Bernice for never telling him. They’d had a horrible fight, and he’d left. The one time he’d had any balls in that marriage. Bernice had decided that the best way to get him back, was to get their daughter back.
James had been so mad at Alicia, that he had gone along with Bernice’s demand to return Tori. And at age five, Tori was ripped from her arms and returned to her parents.
“I didn’t raise you,” Alicia finally began, “because you deserved your mother and your father.”
Tori sniffed and raised her head. Looking into Alicia’s eyes, she said, “But you never told me about the court battle.”
Alicia reared back a little, surprised that Tori knew about that now. Bernice had threatened her at the time, telling her that if she’d told Tori about how she’d fought to keep her, Alicia would never see Tori again.
That didn’t concern Alicia. Nothing that Bernice ever said did. But without James in her corner, she didn’t want to take that chance. Besides, she wanted to give Tori the best chance with Bernice and James. All kinds of strikes were against her already having a mother like Bernice. Alicia didn’t see how it would help to complicate the situation even more for the young girl.
“Who told you about that?” Alicia asked.
“Dad. Last week. He said that you did try to keep me. That you even took it to court, but the judge said that you had to give me back.”
Alicia nodded.
A small smile curved Tori’s lips. “I thought Dad was lying. I thought he was just trying to make me feel better about everything that’s happened.”
“He was telling the truth. And did he tell you that I didn’t give you back?”
Tori frowned and shook her head.
“You were at home with a friend of mine while I was in court and the judge told me that I had two hours to turn you over. I told your parents that I would bring you to their apartment, but I didn’t have any intention of doing that. I went home, got you, and went straight to the bus station.”
“You were going to take me away?”
Alicia nodded. “And through the years, you don’t know how many times I wished that I’d gotten on the bus. Every time I saw you with Bernice, every time I watched her destroying the joy that had filled your heart when you were with me.” She shook her head. “But I didn’t get on the bus because I didn’t think that it was fair to you. You were only five years old; what kind of life would you have had? No real family. No ties. Looking over your shoulder all the time. I would’ve had to teach you to lie about who you were. I didn’t want you to grow up that way. I didn’t want you to grow up, figure it out, and then end up hating me for taking you away from your parents.”
“That would’ve never happened. Especially not with the way Bernice is.”
“But you wouldn’t have known that. You wouldn’t have known her and you would’ve had this picture in your head of a perfect mother, baking brownies all the time and playing games with you all day.” She grinned. “And maybe a mother who even let you have ice cream for breakfast.”
Tori laughed. “I remember that. I always wanted ice cream for breakfast and you always said no.”
“See what I mean? You would’ve wanted a mother who said yes.” Then, Alicia’s smile faded. “Seriously though, I wish I could’ve kept you, but the one thing that you have to know is that I loved you with every bit of my heart. You were the reason why I knew that I could love. With the way I grew up, with the man I married, I was just never sure. But I held onto the love I had for you. Even when you started getting distant at twelve, I loved you.”
Tori lowered her gaze. “That’s when Bernice told me that she’d given you to me at birth because she was dying. And that after five years, you didn’t want me anymore and made them take me back since she hadn’t died.”
Alicia could only shake her head. She should’ve been angry, but nothing Bernice did surprised her. “Your mother is a trip.” She patted Tori’s thigh. “No, baby. That’s not what happened. I never wanted to let you go.”
“Thank you,” Tori whispered.
“For what?”
“For telling me that. For all of that. For loving me and wanting me.”
“Oh, sweetie,” Alicia said as she knelt down in front of Tori. She held her niece’s hands in her own. “I would do it all over again. And maybe this time, I would get on that bus and let you have ice cream for breakfast.”
They chuckled lightly together.
Alicia said, “That’s why all of this was so hard for me. I didn’t want to do this to you.”
“And that’s why it was so easy for me,” Tori said. “Because I wanted to win. I wanted to get back at you for not wanting me. For being just like Bernice and my dad.”
“Now hold on,” Alicia joked. “That’s going too far. I’m nothing like your mother.”
Tori smiled. “No, you’re not.” She paused. “Daddy left her again. He and I are sharing an apartment.”
She nodded. “Wow! That’s good. I hope James will stay away from Bernice this time. She’s his weakness in so many ways.”
“I understand weaknesses,” Tori said. “Dallas was mine. I knew he was a good man, the right man. But, I wanted him for all the wrong reasons.”
Alicia
cupped Tori’s face in her hands. “It takes a very mature, very strong woman to recognize that.”
“I think I knew that all the time,” she said, with a wavering smile. “ Even when I was putting together this ridiculous scheme of an open relationship that would lead to an open marriage. It just sounds crazy to me now.” She sighed. “But, I thank you for not hating me for what I tried to do to you and Dallas when I just should’ve let him go.”
Alicia finally stood. “It wasn’t all your fault. All three of us could have made better decisions.”
Tori nodded. “And, it all worked out the way it was supposed to, right?”
Alicia didn’t respond. Tori knew the answer to that. They stood in an awkward silence for a minute before Alicia said, “Do you want to see the twins?”
Her smile was instant, but Tori shook her head. “You had twins?”
“You didn’t know?”
“No. I only used the investigator to find out where you lived, though that wasn’t hard to do. I probably could’ve found you myself.”
“Come on, they’re sleeping. But come meet your cousins.”
Slowly, Tori shook her head. “Would you be upset if I said not this time? It’s just that ...”
“I understand,” Alicia said, not letting Tori continue.
“It’s kind of emotional overload for me today,” Tori explained anyway. “And I’m staying downtown at the Hilton, so maybe I’ll give you a call tomorrow?”
“That would be great. And I’ll tell Dallas ...”
“No!” Tori exclaimed. “I don’t want to see him. I’m not ready to see him. I’m sure, he hasn’t forgiven me.” She paused as if she was waiting for Alicia to tell her that she was wrong. But Alicia said nothing. Tori continued, “I hope that one day he can. I hope one day he’ll understand.”
“Like I said, this wasn’t all about you,” Alicia told her. But at the same time, she was relieved that Tori didn’t want to see Dallas. There was no need for any new complications. Time and distance. And then, maybe one day ...
“Okay,” Tori exhaled as she moved across the living room. “Well, I’m really glad that I came.”
“I am, too.” Alicia hooked her arm through Tori’s as they walked to the door.
“Thank you for being in my life,” Tori said before she wrapped her aunt into a hug.
Alicia kissed her cheeks before Tori stepped out of the door. She stood there and watched her niece and even as the car drove away, she stood at the door. The whole idea of them trying to make it work between the three of them had been asinine from the beginning. But Alicia was grateful that things had worked out like they did. She’d finally gotten her happiness. She had children she never thought she could. She knew love she never thought she would. And maybe one day, she and Tori could really heal.
Alicia smiled as she closed the door.
Author’s Note
Every Woman Needs a Wife. The Pleasure’s All Mine.
Rich Woman’s Fetish. Slaves of Heaven.
Open Door Marriage
I love catchy titles, but I love writing about complicated relationships even more.
But why would I write this type of novel? What influenced me to explore the outcome of three unlikely people entering into an open relationship such as the one in this novel? Because I’ve had a front seat to one that—in my honest opinion—was the most painful intimate relationship that I had ever witnessed in my life. The only person who seemed to benefit was the man—who was not the primary breadwinner. Actually I never saw him slide in a crumb. The women brought home the bacon, the eggs, the grits, and even the plates, utensils and everything else that landed on the table.
It took nearly two decades for me to wise up and realize one basic thing: these folks are grown and you need to mind your business. The women chose to stay for whatever reason, regardless of his inability to maintain them financially; regardless of how unhappy they seemed or how unfair I thought it was. When I stopped seeing the legal wife as the “victim” in all of this, it drastically changed, not only how I perceived her, but also our friendship. Not that I didn’t love her, but when I exercised my right to say “no” it was clear that she hadn’t learned that declaration. But what I also learned about myself is: no matter how much I love someone else, I will always love myself more. Hence, I no longer put band-aids on self-inflicted relationship wounds. Am I saying that Open Marriages can’t work? Absolutely not! What I’m saying is, that it should be something that is fair to everyone involved. If you like it, I love it. If you don’t like, then pack your bags, pull up stakes and make another choice. A choice that’s fair to you. Bottom line.
I hope you enjoyed this novel and will also check out my other ones that are currently available, and the others that will be coming out over the next two years.
All the best,
National bestselling author Naleighna Kai
Naleighna Kai is a Chicago native, is an inspirational speaker, a Mercedes Benz Mentor Award Nominee, the national bestselling author of Every Woman Needs a Wife, The Pleasure’s All Mine, and a contributing author to a New York Times bestseller. She self-published her first novels before landing a book deal with an imprint of Simon Schuster and later with mega-powerhouse publisher: Brown Girls Publishing.
Naleighna works for a major international law firm and is the CEO of Macro Marketing Promotions Group, as well as marketing consultant to several national bestselling authors and a publishing consultant to aspiring writers. She is the mother of J. L. Woodson, the NAACP Image Award Nominee for Outstanding Literature for his book, Superwoman’s Child: Son of a Single Mother (www.jlwoodson.com) She is currently working on her next novels, Rich Woman’s Fetish and Slaves of Heaven.
* * *
visit Naleighna Kai on the web and social media:
www.naleighnakai.com
www.macrompg.com
www.thecavalcadeofauthors.com
and FaceBook and Twitter: NaleighnaKai
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