by Anna Wilson
To Albert, who looked fang-tastic in his Vlad costume for World Book Day
– A.W.
For my talented cousin Elizabeth who never ceases to impress me!
– K.D.
Contents
Title Page
Dedication
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
About the Author
About the Illustrator
Copyright
Vlad shivered. He was standing in the graveyard outside Misery Manor with his parents and grandfather by his side. It was a chilly, cloudy night and the sky was as black as a bat’s wing. There was not a star in sight – even the moon seemed to have gone into hiding.
Vlad pulled his cape around him. He hated the graveyard and he hated the dark. He was also nervous. He was waiting for the arrival of his cousin, Lupus Fang, who was coming from Transylvania that very night. Vlad’s parents, Drax and Mortemia, had invited Lupus to stay to show Vlad “how to be a real vampire”.
Mother and Father have already decided that he’s a much better vampire than me, Vlad thought as he scanned the inky sky for signs of his cousin’s arrival. I don’t want to have my lessons with him. He’ll make me seem even more of a failure. He shivered again.
“Whatever is the matter with you?” snapped his mother. “Vampires do not feel the cold!”
“It’s not that,” said Vlad through chattering fangs. “I d-don’t like the dark.”
“Well, it’s about time you did,” Mortemia retorted. “You don’t want your cousin Lupus to see you quivering, do you?”
“I don’t care if he does,” Vlad muttered. “I never wanted him to come anyway.”
His father snorted. “If you were better at your vampire skills then we wouldn’t have had to invite him. Although I must admit your mind control is coming along nicely.” He chuckled at the memory of Vlad shrinking his mother to the size of a spider.
The thought of spiders made Vlad shiver all the more. I bet there are hundreds of them out here. He felt as though his skin was crawling with them!
Grandpa Gory joined in with Drax’s chuckling, as if reading his thoughts. “Mwhaha!” he chortled wheezily. “That was wicked!”
Mortemia glared at the old vampire. Gory immediately turned his laugh into a cough and slunk into the shadows.
“I’d rather you put your skills to better use,” said Mortemia bitterly. “You’d better not try shrinking your cousin, either.”
Flit the bat flew down from the yew tree in the corner of the graveyard. He landed on Vlad’s shoulder. “Don’t let them upset you,” the little bat whispered. “I’ll stick with you.”
“Thanks,” Vlad said. He didn’t know what he would do without Flit. He’d already told the bat all his fears about his cousin coming to stay.
“He can’t be good at everything,” Flit squeaked, flying up and hovering by Vlad’s side.
But Lupus’s brilliant vampire skills were the least of Vlad’s worries. Worse than that, Vlad was anxious that his cousin would find out his biggest secret – that he went to human school!
“Here he is!” shouted Drax, startling Vlad out of his thoughts. He pointed towards a dark shape coming through the night sky towards them.
Vlad followed his father’s long bony finger. The black thing was moving at top speed. Vlad felt sure it was aiming straight for him! He squealed and dipped behind a tombstone for cover, then peeped round it. The shape was getting closer and closer and seemed to be accompanied by a swirling cloud of other smaller shapes.
“What are all those things flying with him?” he asked in alarm.
Mortemia tutted. “They’re carrier bats, of course. How else do you think Lupus would be able to bring his luggage?”
“Carrier bats!” cried Grandpa Gory. “Good to see they’re still using them in the Old Country.”
“Yes,” said Drax. “They may be more modern than us in some things, but Transylvanian vampires still use the old-fashioned methods of travel.”
Vlad crept out from behind the tombstone and stared up at the shapes as they came closer. His mother was right – a tight swarm of bats was circling now, each clutching a bag in their claws. In the midst of them was a larger bat.
Vlad couldn’t see very clearly because his night vision was still not as good as it should’ve been. He squinted at the big bat.
It must be Lupus, Vlad thought. Father said he was big and strong. I wish he would turn around and go back home.
Vlad screwed his eyes tight shut. He made himself think about how angry he was. Then he focused on sending Lupus away, using mind control.
He imagined Lupus being surrounded by the carrier bats…
…the bats would swoop him up and turn him around…
…Lupus would be powerless to resist…
…he would be carried back to Transylvania…
Suddenly, Vlad felt the air around him grow even colder. His mind went cloudy. It was as though someone were pushing his thoughts out of his brain, freezing him so that he couldn’t move, couldn’t think…
Vlad tried to concentrate but it was no use. The cloudiness became heavier and darker, and he himself became colder and colder. He found that he couldn’t remember where he was or what he was thinking.
Then…
THWACK!
Something slapped into Vlad, pushing him back into the tombstone. He bumped his head.
“OW!” He struggled to sit up and blinked into the darkness. “What was that?” he cried.
“You should keep your eyes open, mate,” said a voice. “’Specially when you’re in the flight path of an incoming vampire. Mwhahahahaha!”
Vlad shrieked and ducked back behind the tombstone, while Mortemia burst out laughing.
“Bravo!” Drax applauded. “What a landing. Super-fast nosedive!”
“Like a hawk plummeting towards its prey,” added Grandpa Gory approvingly.
Vlad peeked back around the stone to get a good look at his cousin. Lupus was the same age as Vlad, but even in the dark it was clear how much taller and stronger he was.
Vlad groaned inwardly. “Thanks, Uncle D,” Lupus said to Drax. “It’s great to finally get here.”
Uncle D? Vlad thought. Father won’t like that nickname.
But Drax gave Lupus a hearty slap on the shoulder and said, “We’ve been looking forward to your visit, young devil.”
“Did you have a good flight?” Mortemia asked, brushing down Lupus’s cape. “You’re brave to come all this way on your own.”
Drax nodded. “It’s a long way from Transylvania.”
“In my day, young vampires had to have an adult flying with them,” said Grandpa.
“Yeah well, this is the twenty-first century, not the seventeenth,” said Lupus with a grin.
Drax chuckled. “That’s true!” he said.
Vlad gasped. He was speechless at how his cousin had got away with being so cheeky.
Flit gave a disapproving squeak, but Mortemia and Drax didn’t notice. They seemed enchanted by Lupus.
“There was a bit of turbulence on the way over,” Lupus told them, “but I just went with the flow. You know what it’s like – if you relax you can fly through anything.”
Drax looked at Mortemia approvingly. “Just what I always say, isn’t it, my evil one?”
“Indeed,” said his mother crisply. “In fact, perhaps you can take Vlad on a night flight a bit later, Lupus? You’re here to work, after all.”
“Sure. I can show Vlad some tricks,” Lupus replied carele
ssly.
Vlad scowled.
Lupus noticed Vlad’s expression and his grin faltered. “Maybe some other time. I’m pretty hungry now,” he said.
Drax clapped his hands and roared, “Of course! An energetic young vampire like you needs his iron. Let’s get you inside.”
“Yes,” Mortemia said. “Why don’t you dismiss your bats, Lupus? They’re welcome to stay in the belfry. Flit will show them the way.”
The bats began to cluster around Flit.
“Sorry, Vlad!” Flit squeaked. “I’ll come and see you later.”
Then he flew off to the belfry at the far end of Misery Manor with the carrier bats following.
Vlad watched sorrowfully as his bat friend disappeared into the darkness.
“Mulch will bring the bags,” Mortemia was saying. “And Vlad, you can show Lupus your room – you’ll be sharing,” she explained to Lupus.
“What?” Vlad exclaimed. “Why can’t he stay in the West Wing? There are loads of spare coffins there.”
“Vladimir!” Drax exploded. “Lupus is one of the family and will be treated as such. Show him to your room immediately. I’ve already asked Mulch to move a coffin in for him. Why don’t you join us in the dining room for lunch once Lupus has unpacked?”
“Hmm, lunch!” said Grandpa Gory, smacking his lips. “I thought you’d never ask.” He began hobbling towards the house with Mortemia and Drax on either side of him.
Vlad eyed Lupus’s bags. He’d brought so much luggage! It looks as though he’s planning to stay for ever, he thought.
“Come on then, Lupus,” Vlad said gloomily.
He turned and made his way in to Misery Manor with Lupus close behind.
“This is my room,” Vlad muttered, pushing open the door.
Lupus said nothing as he walked around, taking a good hard look at everything.
Vlad meanwhile was taking a good hard look at Lupus! In many ways he looked like a traditional vampire: he had jet-black hair, huge fangs and he wore an expensive-looking black velvet cape lined with red silk.
However, under the cape, Vlad could see clothes that looked distinctly un-vampiric. Curiously, they looked a lot like the clothes Vlad wore to human school. Lupus had human trainers on his feet, too – and they flashed when he walked! Vlad felt a mixture of confusion and envy.
Mother and Father would never EVER let me wear shoes as cool as that! he thought.
Lupus peered at the cobweb-covered ceiling. Then his gaze went to the heavy oak chest where Vlad hid his private possessions.
I hope Lupus doesn’t go and poke his nose in there, Vlad thought.
If he did, he would discover a stash of books which Vlad had borrowed from the school library. And the book report Vlad had written for his teacher, Miss Lemondrop.
I should have asked Mulch to look after them, he thought.
Mulch was the family butler. He was a good friend to Vlad and knew some of Vlad’s secrets – including that he had a best friend called Minxie who was a human!
A cold trickle of horror crept down Vlad’s neck as he thought of what might happen if Lupus ever found out about Minxie. It was just too dangerous having his cousin to stay. Lupus suddenly let rip with the evillest laugh Vlad had ever heard.
“MWAHAHAHAAAAAAA!”
“Eek!” Vlad jumped so high he almost turned into a bat by mistake. He had to reach for his inhaler and take a long puff to recover.
“Sorry,” said Lupus, biting back laughter. “It’s just – this room…!”
“What’s wrong with it?” Vlad asked.
“It’s so old-fashioned!” Lupus exclaimed. He pointed to the coffins. “They’re so last century. In Transylvania we sleep in four-poster beds with duvets and pillows. I should’ve known it would be different here,” he added with a chuckle. “Your parents insisted on sleeping in coffins when they came to my house. It’s so dusty here, too! No wonder you have to use an inhaler,” Lupus went on. “Our family doctor, Dr Sawitov, says ‘if you Hoover each day you keep asthma away’.”
“Hoover?” said Vlad, looking puzzled.
Lupus gaped at his cousin. “You don’t know what a Hoover is? I’m guessing you don’t know what a TV is either?” he added. “Or a computer?”
Vlad bristled. “Actually, I do know what a computer is – oh!” He clapped his hand to his mouth as he realized what he’d said. The only reason he knew about computers was because of human school – but he couldn’t tell Lupus that!
Lupus narrowed his eyes. “You were saying…?” he asked.
Before Vlad could think what to say, two black shapes zipped in through the bedroom door and flew around the room in circles, chasing each other. One of them was Flit.
“Eek! Eek!” the bat shrieked. “Get it off me!”
Vlad scurried behind his coffin and crouched low. “Flit!” he shouted out in bat language. “What’s going on?”
Flit plummeted towards Vlad. “It’s a big black bird!” he squeaked. “Help, hide me!”
The bird swooped down, making straight for Flit. Vlad grabbed the little bat and then dived into his coffin and under the covers. He lay there, clutching poor Flit, the two of them quivering with fright.
“Get it out of here!” came Vlad’s muffled voice from under his bedspread.
“Mwahahahahaa!” Lupus guffawed. “You two are such scaredy-bats. It’s only Claw,” he said.
The large bird came to settle on Lupus’s arm.
“Hell’s bells, you English vampires are strange. Have you never seen a raven before?” Lupus asked.
Vlad poked his head out from under the covers. “A RAVEN?” he repeated. “IN MY ROOM?”
“It’s my room too now, and where I go, Claw goes,” Lupus said stubbornly.
“Caw-caw! I’m not staying in the belfry with those stupid bats,” croaked Claw.
“Stupid?” squeaked Flit. “I’ll show you who’s stupid.” He performed a loop-the-loop and spun around Claw’s head until the bird’s eyes were rolling in their sockets.
“Stop it!” Claw cried. “You’re making me dizzy.”
“You stop chasing me, then,” said Flit.
“Yeah, leave my bat alone,” said Vlad. He felt anger boil up inside him. He wished more than ever that he could make Lupus and the horrible raven disappear.
He closed his eyes and imagined them being sucked outside by a gust of wind…
…out into the corridor and up, up into the Black Tower…
But then the cold feeling that Vlad had had in the graveyard took hold of him again…
…his thoughts became dark and cloudy…
…and he couldn’t think of anything at all!
He opened his eyes and shook his head to get rid of the horrible blackness.
“I’m off!” squeaked Flit, whizzing up from under the covers and out through the crack in the door.
“Flit, come back!” Vlad cried. But the bat had already gone. “What happened…?” Vlad asked, turning to Lupus.
Vlad’s cousin looked strange. He was staring hard at Vlad, his expression fierce. Claw was sitting on his shoulder, cackling quietly.
“What are you doing?” Vlad asked, puzzled.
All at once Lupus’s stern frown relaxed and he gave one of his maddeningly cheeky grins. “Chill, mate!” he said. “You’ll have to work harder on your mind control. You’re far too easy to block.” He winked. “You need to do it without getting all stressy. It’s like flying – the more you relax, the easier it is.”
Vlad snapped with irritation. “Why don’t you just go back to—?” he began.
STOMP-STOMP-STOMP.
Vlad stopped. He recognized that sound…
Claw shot up to the rafters while Lupus looked inquisitively towards the door. Someone or something was pushing it open v e r y, v e r y s l o w l y …
“May I come in?” said a deep and gloomy voice.
“Mulch!” cried Vlad, rushing to greet the huge lumbering butler. At last! Someone who was on his side.
The butler was carrying every single one of Lupus’s bags in his massive muscly arms. He came into the room and dropped them on to the floor by Lupus’s coffin.
“You’re Master Fang, I assume?” Mulch asked.
“Yeah,” said Lupus, flicking his long fringe out of his eyes.
Mulch bowed and turned to Vlad. “Everything all right, Master Impaler?” he asked.
Vlad took a deep breath. He decided that he needed to tell a little fib to get rid of Lupus. Surely Mulch would help him, as he had before now?
“Lupus doesn’t want to share my room,” Vlad said, speaking quickly. “There’s not really enough space—”
“Vlad?” Mortemia’s shrill voice echoed along the corridor.
Mulch held up his hand. “Sorry, Master,” he said. “The Countess has given her orders and I must obey.”
With that, he lumbered out, just as Mortemia appeared in the doorway. She was carrying a tray with a jug of dark red liquid and two tall glasses.
“I thought you two were coming to lunch?” she said, glowering at Vlad and Lupus. “Mulch laid the table ages ago. Your lovely warm blood is getting cold. We must get on with lessons – you can drink your meal in here.”
She poured two glasses of blood.
“What?” Lupus cried. “You guys don’t still drink blood, do you? This gets better and better!”
Vlad was pleased to see that his mother looked insulted. “Yes, Lupus,” she said carefully. “We do still drink blood. Drax and I believe it’s important to uphold the traditional vampiric ways of life.”
Lupus quickly put on a serious face and nodded. “Yeah, I totally get that,” he said, taking a glass.
Vlad watched in astonishment as his cousin swallowed the pint of blood down in one long glug.
“Mmm,” said Lupus, wiping his mouth on the back of his sleeve. “I’d forgotten how delicious traditional vampire food is. Can I have some more, Auntie Morty?”
Mortemia winced slightly at the nickname, but then forced a smile. “Of course,” she said. She poured a second pint.
