by Barbara Goss
Carrie! He called me Carrie? Only my closest friends call me Carrie. While it sounded nice coming from him, it didn’t soften her mood toward him.
Caroline, still a bit angry with Simon, sat down on the ground beside him.
“My sister Caroline is called Carrie, do you mind me calling you Carrie?”
“It’s fine,” she said. Why not, she thought. It would make the ruse they created seem more real.
“If you think you can’t handle the chores, now is the time to bail out."
Caroline thought for several minutes before making her decision. She stiffened her back. “I can do it.”
Simon simply nodded.
“I’ll need some aprons,” she said. “The woman over there,” she pointed to the wagon, “told me all the women wear aprons to save the few dresses they own.”
Simon stood. “I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll take you to the hotel for a nice dinner tonight. It will be a long time before we eat a good three-course meal. On the way, we’ll stop and get you whatever you need at the store.”
Now Caroline felt guilty for being angry with Simon. He could be so darned nice when he wanted to be. She smiled at him. “Thank you,” was all she could manage.
Simon had noted that morning how brilliantly blue Carrie’s eyes were. He’d have to be careful, those eyes could melt him if he let his guard down. Romance did not fit in his plans and even if it did, he could not break their rules or her trust. She was an innocent woman without a family and he would see that she arrived in Oregon safely.
He had a lot to think about. Caroline’s cakes that morning were salty and burnt. Yet, she tried so hard he hadn’t the heart to criticize them. She was trying and he vowed to be as patient as he could, although she had a strange effect on him. When she smiled up at him, he felt… he couldn’t find the word he wanted to describe the feeling. It felt like when, years ago, he nursed a bird with a broken wing and the bird flew off after his nursing. He guessed it might be that helping another gave him this euphoric feeling.
He’d had a few romances back in St. Louis, but he’d never felt tied down to one woman. His only passion was his work and becoming successful. As a Christian man, he tried to live a life pleasing to God. There would be time enough for romance and marriage when he’d reached his goal of financial security.
True to his word, Simon escorted Caroline to the general store where he purchased a few minor accessories and four aprons for Caroline. He also bought her a Mackinaw blanket, a shawl, rain gear, and a pair of boots.
Caroline wondered if Simon was a rich man to have so much money to spend. When he paid for the goods, she noted that he pulled out a large wad of bills. He might be rich but he was also generous and kind— when he wanted to be.
4
Simon knocked on the side of the wagon before the sun had even come up on Friday morning. “I’m coming,” she called, so he’d stop knocking. Caroline stretched and moaned. Not only would she have to start a fire in the dark, but cook in it too! It was a challenge enough in the daylight. When she stepped out of the wagon, Simon paced in front of the fire.
“You made the fire!” she sighed with relief.
“I won’t be able to do it for you every morning, but I will help when I can.”
Caroline smiled, “Thank you! I’ll whip us up some breakfast.”
He smiled mischievously and held out his hands. “Eggs," he announced proudly.
“Wherever did you get them?”
Jake and Henry brought them. They thought since this would most likely be the last day for fresh eggs, we’d have a good breakfast to start our journey. “Nice fellas, huh?”
Caroline nodded. She was sure she could cook eggs since she'd done it numerous times. She just had to get used to cooking on open flames. Things burned easily. “Shall I get us some ham to go with them?”
“Great idea.” I’m going to give Jake and Henry some final instructions and bring them back to eat.”
Jake and Henry were introduced to Caroline. Henry seemed friendlier. Caroline’s eggs and ham turned out almost perfect. One yoke broke, but she kept that one for herself.
“C’mon Carrie,” Simon coaxed, clapping his hands together. Word has it that we roll in fifteen minutes. Get those dishes washed. I’ll finish hitching the oxen.”
When at last the wagons began to move, she perched herself inside the wagon and onto her bedroll.
Simon smirked when he saw Caroline jump into the wagon. We’ll see how long she can stand the jostling. He jumped up in the driver’s seat and yelled, “Ha!” And they had begun their long journey.
After being on the road for about an hour, Caroline stuck her head out the front opening behind Simon. “Stop! We have to stop!” she yelled.
Simon turned his head sideways to see her, “We can’t stop! We have wagons in front and behind us! What’s the matter?”
“I feel sick.” she replied.
“I’ll stop long enough for you to jump down and sit next to me.” He brought the team to a halt and turned to help her crawl out of the opening. “What’s wrong?”
“The bumpy ride has upset my breakfast. I think I may…”
“Put your head over the side!” he yelled.
Caroline patted her stomach and said, “I think it feels better now. Can we stop for a while?”
Simon rolled his eyes. “We can but we’ll lose our place in line. The further back your wagon is, the more dust you get.” He started the team moving again. “It’s going to be bumpy here in front too. Look.” He pointed. “The other women are walking.”
“Walking!!!” She exclaimed. “You want me to walk all the way to Oregon?”
Simon sighed. “Maybe try it until your stomach feels better.”
She sighed.
He slowed the wagon enough so he could help Caroline jump to the ground. She walked beside the wagon. “If you get tired,” he yelled, “let me know and I’ll sit you back up here with me for a while.”
And so went the beginning of their two thousand mile journey.
Around noon the wagons halted for what the wagon train people called “nooner” or “nooning”. Caroline brought out some cheese and crackers. “Nooner” meal didn’t allow for time to build a fire and cook.
She liked Henry, but Jake seemed a bit strange. She thought perhaps he might be shy and would warm to her and Simon in time. Henry ate with them, while Jake took his plate back to his wagon and ate alone. He always brought his plate back, handed it to her and mumbled his thanks.
Caroline barely had time to put the supplies away, before the wagons began to roll again. She hadn’t minded the walk too much, although the new shoes pinched her feet. She decided to ride next to Simon, despite the bumps, at least for a while. Simon then pointed out that the other women were collecting firewood as they walked, carrying them in their aprons. “It’s another of your jobs,” he pointed out. Now it was her turn to roll her eyes. She jumped down and started collecting wood. Sometimes she had to veer a bit away from the wagons since the women in the trains ahead had picked most of the ones near the trail, but she always kept the train in sight.
And so went the first week of their journey. Caroline walked some and rode some next to Simon. Picking up firewood as she walked became automatic. She slept nightly in the wagon and he in his tent and no one questioned them or their situation.
During the first week on the trail, Caroline learned and already toughened up to the life. Simon, always considerate, helped whenever he could. When Caroline caught up with her work, she often lent him a hand caring for the animals. The wagon master, Jesse, split the sixty wagons into three groups of twenty, but they traveled fairly close together to ensure safety. Each train appointed a leader. Their wagon stayed in the first train, and Jesse remained their leader.
Some evenings, they sat around the fire with other travelers at the main fire. Stories were told and sometimes they even sang. Caroline thought it would help them get to know each other if they sat before t
heir own fire some nights and chatted. So while Simon tended the animals, she built up a nice fire and dragged a large log near the fire. She sat and waited for him.
“What’s this?” he asked when he returned.
“I felt like having a quieter evening by our own fire. Is that all right?” she asked.
“Sure. Sounds like a good idea. Just let me wash my hands and I’ll join you,” he said.
When Simon got comfortable beside her on the log, she asked, “Did you come from a large family?”
“I had four brothers and two sisters, four cats and two dogs, I’d say that was large, wouldn’t you?”
“Oh, my! Yes. I would have loved that.” She’d often wished for siblings.
Caroline watched the firelight play on Simon’s face. The sound of the crackling fire, the smell of burning wood, and the intimacy all made this a delightful evening.
Silas stabbed the fire with a stick to keep the wood in the center. “What about you? I know that you didn’t have any siblings, and that your mother died during childbirth, but what happened to your father after she died? How did your family fall apart?”
“My parents were barely married a year when my mother died having me. Naturally, I can’t remember what went on since I was just a baby. However, my aunt told me that he just couldn’t cope with losing her and that he felt it was his fault for getting her ‘with child’. He drank to ease his pain and never stopped. I’m not sure if he couldn’t stop or wouldn’t stop drinking himself into oblivion.”
“So you never lived with him at all?” he asked.
“No. He couldn’t stand to look at me since he also felt I had killed her. I was sent to live with my aunt and uncle immediately after my birth. In my heart, my aunt was my mother, although she was my mother’s older sister. You see my mother was a ‘late in life’ baby for my grandparents. My aunt was much older than my mother. So basically I was reared by two elderly people.”
“That’s very sad about how your father felt.” He shook his head and frowned. “Were you a lonely child?” he asked.
“Very. I wasn’t even allowed a pet. There were no amusements, parties or trips. The only other interaction I had was my cousin Hattie.”
“Your aunt’s daughter?” Simon asked.
“Yes, she is a lot older than I and married and moved to Oregon when I was just ten years old.”
Caroline was touched that Simon was so interested in her life because no one had ever seemed interested before.
“So, this is the family you are going to Oregon to live with?”
She nodded. “And now you can understand why reaching her is so important to me. With my aunt and uncle dead, she’s the only family I have.”
They didn’t talk for several minutes so Caroline changed the subject. “What will you do when you get to Oregon?”
“I’m going to Portland to sell my supplies, and then I have two options— start a lumberyard or take a land grant and become a farmer. I haven’t decided yet.”
Caroline sat mesmerized by the fire, when it crackled loudly, Caroline jumped.
“Are you cold?” Simon asked. “Your coat doesn’t look warm enough.”
“Oh, it is. I’m not cold. The fire just startled me, and I’m feeling tired.” Caroline stood and yawned.
“Me too and the morning comes much too fast on the trail, doesn’t it?” He stood and built up the fire for the night, and dragged the log off to the side. “Goodnight, Carrie.”
Before falling asleep Caroline replayed the evening in her mind. She’d learned about his family, his goals of selling his merchandise and settling down, maybe in Portland. She told him about her family. She fell into a satisfied sleep; glad she’d gotten to know Simon better.
Simon noticed Caroline limping beside the wagon one hot day on the third week of the journey. When they made camp that night, he demanded to see her feet. “Dang!” he exclaimed, as he looked at her bloody feet. “Why didn’t you say something?” He grabbed a clean cloth, dipped it in cold water and gently wiped away the blood from her blistered feet. “That’s it!” he threw the rag into the bucket. “I’m buying you a horse!”
Caroline’s eyes brightened. “A horse?”
“Yes, you won’t be expected to walk again. I’ll make the fire and cook breakfast tomorrow, and I don’t want you to get up until we start to roll.”
“But where will you buy the horse out here?”
Simon rubbed his forehead. He’d seen another woman riding one next to a wagon about five wagons ahead of them. “There are horses owned by some of the families, maybe I could buy one from them. If not, soon we’ll run into Indian’s anxious for a good trade. I’ll try as hard as I can and in the meantime, I want you to ride next to me. I know it’s bumpy, but I can’t let you walk and have your feet bleed like this.”
True to his word, Simon arose earlier than usual and built the fire, cooked breakfast and cleaned up afterward. He had to hurry to hitch the team, but he did it. It softened Caroline’s heart toward him.
The next afternoon they approached a river, but several Indians blocked the way to cross it. They wanted money to allow the train through. After each family paid the fifty-cent fare, they were allowed to cross. Most of the wagons had no problem crossing the shallow water, but a few, due to poor leading, swayed and almost tipped over. Water rushed into some of the wagons, and Caroline knew the families would have a mess to clean up. Their wagon thankfully stayed dry.
Simon had no luck buying Caroline a horse. The few families that had them refused to part with them. He insisted on taking over her jobs until her feet healed. This extra work tired him out and one night he fell asleep at the campfire.
As the trains continued, it became frequent that Indians demanded money to cross over streams and rivers. The families complained and some became short of money, until finally one family approached Simon and agreed to sell him a horse. The man needed the money to help defray the costs of the tolls. Simon paid him a fair price.
“She’s a beauty,” Caroline said with a bright smile. “I’m going to name her Daisy.”
Daisy was a bay roan horse, and she came complete with saddle. She’d always ridden astride on her family’s small farm, and luckily her shoes were high and her dresses full and long enough for her to do so without showing much of her legs.
Caroline rode beside the wagon, and her feet healed nicely. Usually, she rode to the last wagon and back to the first to break up the boredom. She became familiar with a woman named Ella, who walked alongside her wagon each day. They passed words briefly at first and little by little became more acquainted. Ella was quite a bit older than Caroline; she had a husband and teenage son. Caroline enjoyed having a female friend and looked forward to their chats each day.
One morning, they passed an Indian village. Simon explained it as a temporary village the Indians purposely placed near the trail, so they could barter and sell wares. Cringing, Caroline hoped they would soon travel a distance from the village, but one of the trains further ahead broke an axle, so they stopped for an early nooning. The Indians swarmed the train with goods to sell or trade. Simon bought fresh salmon from them and looked forward to a tasty dinner. He placed the Salmon in a bucket of cold water, until they stopped for the day.
Soon the train moved again, and Caroline rode Daisy alongside of Simon and the wagon. Thunder rumbled overhead and soon it began to rain. It rained so hard that the train stopped for the day. Usually, they traveled fifteen to eighteen miles a day, but this day they’d only gone about ten miles.
Simon had no time to erect his tent, so he pulled Caroline under the wagon with him. They still got wet, but not nearly as drenched as they would have. The ground was hard and damp and Caroline’s mouth watered for the salmon dinner. She didn’t mind the cold ground because she loved being this close to Simon. While they didn’t touch under the wagon, she could feel the heat from his body, and it was enough to warm her.
When the rain finally stopped, Caroline tried to gr
ab the firewood from the inside of the wagon, only to discover the wagon bed filled with water. Her bedding was soaked and so was the wood.
Simon crawled into one of his supply wagons and found some dry lumber for their fire. Neither of them could wait to taste the salmon. That evening they finally enjoyed their grilled salmon dinner. And Caroline and Simon both remarked how wonderful it tasted.
Simon helped Caroline remove her bedding, wring it out, and hang it over some nearby bushes to dry. In the meantime, she had no place to sleep.
Simon, once again came to her rescue. “You’ll have to share my tent.”
5
“Share your tent?” Caroline gasped.
“Looks like we haven’t much choice.”
Caroline thought about it for a few moments. “It’s large enough?”
“Plenty large. The problem is… I don’t have a second set of dry linen or another blanket. We’ll have to share.”
Caroline simply stared at him. He’d been the perfect gentleman since the day she met him, so she had no reason not to trust him. She simply shrugged, “Like you said, what choice have we?”
“Good. I’ll check the animals. You make up our bed in the tent.”
Caroline crawled inside the tent and was thankful when she saw that the quilt and blankets were large and took up nearly the whole width of the tent. She breathed a sigh of relief. Being an only child she’d never in her life had to share a bed with anyone… especially a man! Even through the quilt Caroline could feel the hard, cold wet ground underneath.
As Caroline lay in her make shift bed, she heard Simon talking softly. She peeked out of the tent flap and saw that he sat with his Bible on his lap. He was praying.
Caroline had never heard anyone pray before. She tried to listen but his words were too low in volume for her to make out the words, except the “amen” at the end. After that Simon crawled into the tent. He settled himself on the far left as she laid on the right.
